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Time off for funeral

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    #62
    Beaucoupfish
    Registered Users Posts: 173 ✭✭Beaucoupfish


    Tell your manager that your grandmother is dying. Being truthful is the best policy.


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    #63
    Polo_Mint
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,504 ✭✭✭Polo_Mint


    Ask your manager what she would do if one of her loved ones was dying.


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    #64
    Iecrawfc
    Registered Users Posts: 213 ✭✭Iecrawfc


    Gringo180 wrote: »
    What is the employer coming to when you cant even take a day off to attend a grand parents funeral. A disgraceful way to be treated OP.

    Absolutely, if the OP's employers care at all for their employees then this should not be an issue, the fact that people are suggesting they postpone the funeral or get the person to pay someone else out of their own pocket to do the work the company should be paying for shows that things have become seriously skew ways in regards to work, surely to god it's not a life or death job that the organisation can't manage to give a day off for an employees relatives funeral? Could the manager step in for a day and do the job? The fact they've neglected to replace a person on maternity leave and now find themselves in this situation is the employers fault not the employees, sounds like an awful place to work...


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    #65
    smcgiff
    Closed Accounts Posts: 5,943 ✭✭✭smcgiff


    RainyDay wrote: »
    She might actually be happy to get back in touch with people for a day.

    Doubtful, going by the OP's comments about his workplace and said colleagues, they'll be lucky if they ever see her again.

    Don't know how you're fixed financially and your commitments, OP, but I would find it inconceivable not going to a grandparent's funeral.

    IF I were somehow forced to miss such a funeral I would absolutely work to rule until I found a new job as soon as possible. That would mean taking the lawful time away from my desk in the morning and the full half hour lunch time away from my desk (even if this was an inconvenience to me).

    This is perfectly legal, and you cannot be sacked for it. You might even want to make your manager aware of this in advance.

    I know times are tough out there jobs wise, but I don't think I could tolerate that working environment.


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    #66
    Lux23
    Registered Users Posts: 7,134 ✭✭✭Lux23


    I always got time off for family funerals, my father died last week and I still haven't returned to work. They sound like a terrible shower to work for.


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    #67
    Polo_Mint
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,504 ✭✭✭Polo_Mint


    Lux23 wrote: »
    I always got time off for family funerals, my father died last week and I still haven't returned to work. They sound like a terrible shower to work for.

    Sorry to hear that

    When My dad died I was given time off from when he was in his final days to after the funeral.


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    #68
    Mrs OBumble
    Registered Users Posts: 25,704 ✭✭✭✭Mrs OBumble


    Whiplashy wrote: »
    no phone calls over Christmas even if it's urgent!

    You're over-thinking it.

    If it's urgent, you still ring. But for routine matters, you can email, and your manager will be checking even though she's not working herself. (So really she's in as bad a position as you - is there anyone to cover her if she has a family emergency?)

    Is there a reasonable chance that anyone is going to die or be seriously injured if the office is not staffed? If the answer's yes, then your job clearly has some responsibilities which are greater than your family, and I hope you're well paid for them.

    But if it's "no" then that's a chance that the manager might just have the office unstaffed for some time. Make sure that's her call, not yours. But be very clear with her about your family responsibilities as you see them, too.

    One of the joys of working in modern Ireland - where technology makes it possible to work for an overseas company from the comfort of home - is that you will likely be managed according to a combination of Irish law and another culture's norms. Despite how inconceivable some people find this, Irish law doesn't require leave for a grandparent's funeral, and that's what guides the multi-national managers. So I wouldn't necessary totally condemn the manager.


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    #69
    SpaceTime
    Closed Accounts Posts: 9,088 ✭✭✭SpaceTime


    I'll tell you one thing though: refusing time off for a funeral can be a very very poor HR decision.

    I saw it happen once. A guy was refused time off for the death of a grandparent. He spent the day in foul humour, broke down crying at his desk at one stage. Then bore a grudge against the manager, got a new job and left with minimum notice and provided minimum handover info. Even clients heard about the incident via his family.


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    #70
    smcgiff
    Closed Accounts Posts: 5,943 ✭✭✭smcgiff


    SpaceTime wrote: »
    Even clients heard about the incident via his family.

    Even multi-nationals are not immune to bad PR.


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    #71
    Whiplashy
    Registered Users Posts: 2,097 ✭✭✭Whiplashy


    Thanks for all the advice guys. It's not life and death if we leave the office unmanned, but it is a major breach of our contract with our client, so it's really not an option.

    I firmly believe that the woman on maternity leave isn't going to be coming back, so that's definitely not an option.

    There is no way I'd put my job before my family, so if I can't organise the funeral for a day I'm not working, I will be attending, even if that means the office is left unmanned and I get my P45.


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    #72
    handlemaster
    Registered Users Posts: 6,003 ✭✭✭handlemaster


    In short the OP must work with a right shower of .....#@€;#


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    #73
    Mr E
    Registered Users Posts: 55,456 ✭✭✭✭Mr E


    Sometimes we have to leave the office unmanned (often it can't be helped). When it happens we can forward the main line to one of our mobiles, so if anyone calls, at least you have the chance to be able to pick it up (or let it go to VM and you can respond where possible). If you want to go the extra mile, change your personal voicemail message to a work voicemail message for the day.


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    #74
    Deenie123
    Closed Accounts Posts: 481 ✭✭Deenie123


    Whiplashy wrote: »
    I rang my manager today and told her that I wanted to give her prior notice that my grandmother is very unwell and I could be looking for time off for the funeral before the end of the year. Her answer? "We'll cross that bridge when we come to it. Don't forget I'm finishing up for Christmas on Wednesday but if you need to contact me urgently you can of course email me. I'll probably be checking it most days."

    I definitely should have went with the sickie! Now I've basically been told, in a roundabout way, no phone calls over Christmas even if it's urgent!

    Is it possible you're misinterpreting it? Or that you can deliberately interpret it as she's said you can contact her via email if you need her?

    "My grandmother has died and the funeral is a day I've been rostered to work, we need to find a solution to this urgently"...?

    On the other hand, life would be easier for you in work if you make this as easy on the manager as possible...

    For example, it's absolutely not unreasonable to time the funeral according to availability. I've done it in the past - it's not right for close family to not be there and the stress of getting a working day off is unreasonable when the funeral can simply be arranged for a day off.

    I'm sure your family will understand and wouldn't want to see you putting yourself at risk of being fired when they can just decide on a day that suits. [On a more personal level I think it's actually better to leave it a couple of days before having the funeral. In my case there were three full days between the day of death and the funeral. It meant that the day of the death was ours to let it sit a bit, the next two days were spent at the undertakers and trying to get a hotel for the afters and organizing all kinds of bits and pieces that just seem to be a nightmare to organize! The third day was spent getting ourselves ready and just unwinding slightly from all the organizing. I think it left us in a better place on the day of the funeral than if it had been dead on day 1 and undertaker to be sorted that day, wake the next day and burried on the third day. I remember being at a family funeral like that and it was such a whirlwind that after it everyone just felt a bit dazed. But I'm digressing.]

    You might want to consider suggesting to your manager that your days off are staggered rather than consecutive? So for example you might get Monday and Thursday off, meaning that no matter what day of the week your nan dies, the funeral can be arranged to be held on either one of those days. I think your manager, nasty as she sounds, will appreciate if you approach her with a mutually workable situation rather than just pulling a sickie and leaving her to deal with it.

    It sounds like an awful situation to be in, I can't imagine how stressful for you and I would also consider a grandparent's funeral to be an absolute that I would not miss, barring being stranded on the other side of the world with no money or credit cards! But it also sounds like you've been a great employee working in a really bad situation. Don't lose the good reference you deserve and have earned. This is a workable situation.


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