Is there "something wrong" with a guy if he...

paddy1990

Doesn't want his future wife to have had sex with 20+ guys?

I was talking to some friends and this came up and the girls were all saying that any guy who has a problem with it (i threw out 20 as an arbitrary number) all had a complex and had issues and "something wrong" with them.

What was funny to me was that some men agreed with the women. I think there was an element of white knighting going on, as the girl that was the most outspoken is absolutely gorgeous, so some of the lads would have been white knighting in the hopes of keeping any hope alive of something happening between them and her on a drunken night. In fact one guy actually admitted this afterwards lol

Personally I would rather marry a girl with as low an amount of sexual partners as possible, with a virgin being absolutely ideal.

johnnyskeleton

paddy1990 wrote: »

Personally I would rather marry a girl with as low an amount of sexual partners as possible, with a virgin being absolutely ideal.

Id rather marry someone who I get along with, but, you know, each to their own.

SparkySpitfire

Well in that case, I hope you come to your future wife with as few notches on your belt as you expect her to have.

Duggy747

Daft outlook to have.

johnnyskeleton

Virginity fetish is it

johnnyskeleton wrote: »

Id rather marry someone who I get along with, but, you know, each to their own.

yea

MagicMarker

paddy1990 wrote: »

Personally I would rather marry a girl with as low an amount of sexual partners as possible, with a virgin being absolutely ideal.

So someone with the same experience as yourself then?

Understandable.

DoYouEvenLift

In4 beta providers being okay with their possible future wives and partners being mothers to their offspring knowing they have previously had sex/blown countless other men.

'Insert lock and key analogy here.'

Those men were more than likely just agreeing because they're afraid of offending the women and think it'll give them a chance to get with them themselves. All women have beta orbiters, you know this.

MagicMarker wrote: »

So someone with the same experience as yourself then?

Understandable.

Ayy lmao

Dr. Kenneth Noisewater

paddy1990 wrote: »

Personally I would rather marry a girl with as low an amount of sexual partners as possible, with a virgin being absolutely ideal.

Nah man she could be a right sack of spuds, you don't want that. A girl who has had quite a few partners is more likely to be good in the bedroom through experience. Obviously this is not always the case, but the odds are improved. She doesn't have to be a complete dirtbird either.

johnnyskeleton

DoYouEvenLift wrote: »

In4 beta providers being okay with their possible future wives and partners being mothers to their offspring knowing they have previously had sex/blown countless other men.

I accept that it matters to some people how many sexual partners their current partner has had. Whether this is right or wrong, rational or irrational, whether they prefer someone with more or less experience than them etc it cant be denied that many people feel that this is an important thing about their lover.

But I got to ask you, how does it impact on their parental abilities?

Surely, without being too glib, these are two very different skill sets.

Mark Tapley

paddy1990 wrote: »

Doesn't want his future wife to have had sex with 20+ guys?

I was talking to some friends and this came up and the girls were all saying that any guy who has a problem with it (i threw out 20 as an arbitrary number) all had a complex and had issues and "something wrong" with them.

What was funny to me was that some men agreed with the women. I think there was an element of white knighting going on, as the girl that was the most outspoken is absolutely gorgeous, so some of the lads would have been white knighting in the hopes of keeping any hope alive of something happening between them and her on a drunken night. In fact one guy actually admitted this afterwards lol

Personally I would rather marry a girl with as low an amount of sexual partners as possible, with a virgin being absolutely ideal.

Is this related to your concerns about insects passing on characteristics of previous sexual partners to their offspring.

gunny558

Galena Rhoades (Ph.D. in psychology) and Research Professor Scott Stanley published a paper through the University of Denver recently enough. I havent read it, but I think the gist of it is the more partners a woman has, the more likely she is to cheat on you. You're better off finding a woman with a low count if you actually plan on having a successful marraige.

DoYouEvenLift

Dr. Kenneth Noisewater wrote: »

Nah man she could be a right sack of spuds, you don't want that. A girl who has had quite a few partners is more likely to be good in the bedroom through experience. Obviously this is not always the case, but the odds are improved. She doesn't have to be a complete dirtbird either.

A high number of previous sexual partners can also be linked with unhappy marriages down the line: www . huffingtonpost . com/2014/08/21/more-sexual-partners-unhappy-marriage_n_5698440.html

Can't embed links yet, sorry.

johnnyskeleton wrote: »

I accept that it matters to some people how many sexual partners their current partner has had. Whether this is right or wrong, rational or irrational, whether they prefer someone with more or less experience than them etc it cant be denied that many people feel that this is an important thing about their lover.

But I got to ask you, how does it impact on their parental abilities?

Surely, without being too glib, these are two very different skill sets.

Parts of my post might sound crude but I'm not sure how else to put it, to be honest.


I, personally, just wouldn't be comfortable seeing a woman who has a high number of previous sexual partners go on to have a kid and then kiss that child with the same mouth that has had multiple, multiple men blow their loads into. I'm saying this because I've experienced it in real life during school when the village bicycle had sex with over 30 people that we know of, its probably well over 50 to be honest, before she was even 18. Nobody respected her or took her seriously because of this. Now she has a child and it's just uncomfortable seeing it. And that's how I feel about a girl I don't even personally know. It'd be a lot worse if I was to be the one ending up with a girl like that, but I wouldn't allow it to happen and put myself through that in the first place.

Mark Tapley

DoYouEvenLift wrote: »

A high number of previous sexual partners can also be linked with unhappy marriages down the line: www . huffingtonpost . com/2014/08/21/more-sexual-partners-unhappy-marriage_n_5698440.html

Can't embed links yet, sorry.



Parts of my post might sound crude but I'm not sure how else to put it, to be honest.


I, personally, just wouldn't be comfortable seeing a woman who has a high number of previous sexual partners go on to have a kid and then kiss that child with the same mouth that has had multiple, multiple men blow their loads into. I'm saying this because I've experienced it in real life during school when the village bicycle had sex with over 30 people that we know of, its probably well over 50 to be honest, before she was even 18. Nobody respected her or took her seriously because of this. Now she has a child and it's just uncomfortable seeing it.

Not so much crude as evidence of unpleasant thought processes. Why are you uncomfortable seeing this woman with a child?

Sauve

DoYouEvenLift wrote: »

A high number of previous sexual partners can also be linked with unhappy marriages down the line: www . huffingtonpost . com/2014/08/21/more-sexual-partners-unhappy-marriage_n_5698440.html

Can't embed links yet, sorry.



Parts of my post might sound crude but I'm not sure how else to put it, to be honest.


I, personally, just wouldn't be comfortable seeing a woman who has a high number of previous sexual partners go on to have a kid and then kiss that child with the same mouth that has had multiple, multiple men blow their loads into. I'm saying this because I've experienced it in real life during school when the village bicycle had sex with over 30 people that we know of, its probably well over 50 to be honest, before she was even 18. Nobody respected her or took her seriously because of this. Now she has a child and it's just uncomfortable seeing it.

Mod

Tone down your derogatory language. It's not acceptable or necessary in this forum. Also, as per our charter, PUA is not allowed to be discussed here.

Daveysil15

paddy1990 wrote: »

Personally I would rather marry a girl with as low an amount of sexual partners as possible, with a virgin being absolutely ideal.

Coming for the guy who admits been promiscuous and meeting loads of women from dating sites?

Shakespeare's Sister

20 by, say, 28 isn't that many. The thing about the 18-year-old girl, yeh id understand that being a turn-off but that's an extreme. 20 by 28 isn't even slightly comparable.
But yeh I'd understand someone being turned off by a person (male or female) having a number of sexual conquests that indicates addictive behaviour.

DoYouEvenLift

Shakespeare's Sister wrote: »

20 by, say, 28 isn't that many. The thing about the 18-year-old girl, yeh id understand that being a turn-off but that's an extreme. 20 by 28 isn't even slightly comparable.
But yeh I'd understand someone being turned off by a person (male or female) having a number of sexual conquests that indicates addictive behaviour.

Riiiiiggghhhhhtttttt.

eviltwin

Nothing wrong with wanting a virgin but there is no need to constantly run down those with a history as if its a character flaw. You might be able to count your lovers on one hand but it doesn't mean anything. You could have been lucky to find someone young, you could have been so lacking in confidence that you never put yourself out there or you could have been in a long term relationship and had one or two affairs. Personally I prefer to know my partner was having sex responsibly regardless of the number.

astonaidan

Is this really still a thing to be weirded about

moonshadow

Quote,

"Personally I would rather marry a girl with as low an amount of sexual partners as possible, with a virgin being absolutely ideal."

Two questions,
1. Are you 14 years old ?
2. Are you Paddy 147 in disguise ? (How's the briquettes going?)

catallus

This makes sense, if you want your kids not to look like her previous 200 partners!

Ave Sodalis

DoYouEvenLift wrote: »

Riiiiiggghhhhhtttttt.

That's only about two a year...

I really don't see why it's such a big problem. My number is around twenty and that's in a three year period, two if you discount the year I've been with my boyfriend. I'm clean and healthy. I'm not going to cheat on my boyfriend, and he doesn't really want to know my number because it's completely irrelevant so I don't see it causing any problems down the line. In terms of parenting, some people actually do this thing called showering and brushing their teeth so traces of other men are long gone, as are their memories for the most part. The fact that that's what you imagine when you see that girl says more about you than about her.

I honestly wouldn't have time for a man who has such a big problem with it. It shows immaturity and a backwards mindset, that hints on sexism and a controlling nature, particularly if they have a high count themselves and the same rules don't apply to men. I happen to know that my partner has only had potentially three girls max, including me but if his count was higher, I wouldn't care as long as he was healthy.

Wompa1

Personally, 20 is a bit off putting to me. No matter what age the lady is.

Not judging anyone but no thank you.

Doom

paddy1990 wrote: »

Doesn't want his future wife to have had sex with 20+ guys?

I was talking to some friends and this came up and the girls were all saying that any guy who has a problem with it (i threw out 20 as an arbitrary number) all had a complex and had issues and "something wrong" with them.

What was funny to me was that some men agreed with the women. I think there was an element of white knighting going on, as the girl that was the most outspoken is absolutely gorgeous, so some of the lads would have been white knighting in the hopes of keeping any hope alive of something happening between them and her on a drunken night. In fact one guy actually admitted this afterwards lol

Personally I would rather marry a girl with as low an amount of sexual partners as possible, with a virgin being absolutely ideal.

If you are Muslim you will get 20 virgins when you die.... Why not still wait till then?

DoYouEvenLift

sup_dude wrote: »

That's only about two a year...

I really don't see why it's such a big problem. My number is around twenty and that's in a three year period, two if you discount the year I've been with my boyfriend. I'm clean and healthy. I'm not going to cheat on my boyfriend, and he doesn't really want to know my number because it's completely irrelevant so I don't see it causing any problems down the line. In terms of parenting, some people actually do this thing called showering and brushing their teeth so traces of other men are long gone, as are their memories for the most part. The fact that that's what you imagine when you see that girl says more about you than about her.

I honestly wouldn't have time for a man who has such a big problem with it. It shows immaturity and a backwards mindset, that hints on sexism and a controlling nature, particularly if they have a high count themselves and the same rules don't apply to men. I happen to know that my partner has only had potentially three girls max, including me but if his count was higher, I wouldn't care as long as he was healthy.

Well that's kind of a given seeing as he also probably wouldn't have time for you since 20 would more than likely fall above what's an acceptable number to him.

If someones number is high enough that they personally don't feel comfortable disclosing the honest truth in fear of the relationship ending or that one partner suspects the others of being too high to personally be able to accept that they fear even knowing the truth then it's just a tad bit sad that two people in a relationship cannot be completely open and honest with one another. If I was in that kind of situation I wouldn't settle until I was with someone I could be truly honest with and be accepted. Also, someone not being comfortable telling the truth about their number of previous partners seems a little insecure in my opinion. I mean, if women are going to try to be like certain men when it comes to having high numbers of sexual partners, which isn't actually very common I might add, then women should also be as confident about their high numbers as men are and be prepared to be open about it...[sarcasm]unless, of course, the woman feels guilty about it for some odd reason.[/sarcasm]

gunny558

eviltwin wrote: »

Nothing wrong with wanting a virgin but there is no need to constantly run down those with a history as if its a character flaw.

I dont think people are saying its a black mark on your character. They'd probably still be friends with you (and even have a one night stand) but when it comes to settling down with a long term partner then its just something they wouldnt fancy in a woman.

J Mysterio

DoYouEvenLift wrote: »

Now she has a child and it's just uncomfortable seeing it.

Bahahaha!

Bepolite

gunny558 wrote: »

Galena Rhoades (Ph.D. in psychology) and Research Professor Scott Stanley published a paper through the University of Denver recently enough. I havent read it, but I think the gist of it is the more partners a woman has, the more likely she is to cheat on you. You're better off finding a woman with a low count if you actually plan on having a successful marraige.

Firstly who says a successful marriage has to be monogamous?

Secondly what ever two people decide works for them one constant holds in the vast majority of cases and that's honesty and trust, if you don't have that then there's not really much else to worry about; you're doomed to fail.

Thirdly, 1951 would like this thread back.

endacl

paddy1990 wrote: »

Personally I would rather marry a girl with as low an amount of sexual partners as possible, with a virgin being absolutely ideal.

Odd attitude, Paddy. I wouldn't be advertising it if you want any girl to take you seriously, unless you're a virgin too.

Which of course would be none of her business, unless you chose to tell her.

endacl

Bepolite wrote: »

Firstly who says a successful marriage has to be monogamous?

I do. But only for me, of course. Don't really care what other people do.

Bepolite

endacl wrote: »

Odd attitude, Paddy. I wouldn't be advertising it if you want any girl to take you seriously, unless you're a virgin too.

Which of course would be none of her business, unless you chose to tell her.

I know a fair few who would take him seriously, generally all to be found gathered in one place on a Sunday and the very best of luck to all of them. The only thing I have an issue with is the hypocrisy of a guy who goes out every week end on the pull and then expects to marry little miss demure, shrinking violet. I'm not suggesting that's the case with the OP only he knows the truth on that one.