Sneakiest thing you have done???

stalebread

What is the lowest, sneakiest thing you have ever done?

Did you get away/ caught?

Wacker The Attacker

I'm a man of honour. I attack from the front

solomafioso

Limbo'd about three feet. I tripped and hit the bar, so didn't get away with it.

Specialun

Why dont you tell us first op

Autonomous

Crawl on my belly...

Sir Arthur Daley

Wacker The Attacker wrote: »

I'm a man of honour. I attack from the front

You do of course :rolleyes:

Tail Docker

I re-regged BEFORE I closed my last account....












shoot, this isn't public, is it??

Sparklygirl

I always let on to everyone that I am a crap liar and never lie. It is too hard to keep a straight face, to rem what I have said etc. I have had no reason to tell a big lie in many years, but I can lie and very very well (cue evil laughter). Sneaky lol.

EoghanIRL

Put coffee in cup and tell cashier it's tea because it's cheaper.

uch

Sweaty Hole one time, went into Penneys changing rooms and dried me hole with the changing room Curtain

Son Of A Vidic

A hot, silent Guinness fart in a packed lift.

myshirt

Corvus Maximus wrote: »

A hot, silent Guinness fart in a packed lift.

Something definitely very, very sinister indeed there.

You are a bad man sir.

calanus

Pissed into a glass* while dancing with a girl because if I left there was no way I was getting back to this part of the dancefloor as the place was bunged. Didn't get caught until I had zipped up and was setting it down to the side of dancefloor. She thought it was my drink and grabbed it to take a sip...... No idea what happened because I behaved like some kind of quantum particle and found spaces where there were none and was out of there by the time she would have realised wither way

*Realise that it might just be the scummiest thing I have ever done and I have worked in a bar and experienced this more times than I could imagine but... you know, things etc.

deise08

Why, you low down, dirty dog.

fleet_admiral

Corvus Maximus wrote: »

A hot, silent Guinness fart in a packed lift.

I did something similar but much worse years ago.

I was in work after a very heavy night on the guinness followed by a vindaloo and desperately needed to build a log cabin
I went and it was so smelly the paint was peeling off the walls. the toilet was part of the changing room so I plugged in a heater to make it worse. One of the waitresses went in and nearly collapsed at the door when the guinness/indian poo cloud hit her.
I didnt flush either

stalebread

Specialun wrote: »

Why dont you tell us first op

Got really pissed drunk made a drunken move on a mates bird who was rotten lookin

Wasn't a mate for much longer...., ah well

MadYaker

I robbed a bottle of Captain Morgans from behind a bar in a marquee at a wedding. It was sneaky because I wasn't at the wedding, in fact the wedding was over because it was about 6am and the marquee was closed so some stealth was required to avoid detection by the hotel staff that were cleaning up.

Paddy Cow

Corvus Maximus wrote: »

A hot, silent Guinness fart in a packed lift.

That's no laughing matter! Did you hear about the guy who was convicted of manslaughter for holding his wife's head under the pillow after he did a Guinness fart and he suffocated her? :eek:

stalebread

Was in Burger King one faithful day having a quick meal on my own

Just finishing up the burger I farted
Or so I thought it was a warm wet shart.

Being far from home and no spare clothes I finished the burger and drink headed into the jax gave jeans a wash with a little toilet roll water. Cleaned myself up and left scuttery boxers rolled up hidden Behind the bowl. And strolled out like a boss

DVDM93

stalebread wrote: »

Was in Burger King one faithful day having a quick meal on my own

Just finishing up the burger I farted
Or so I thought it was a warm wet shart.

Being far from home and no spare clothes I finished the burger and drink headed into the jax gave jeans a wash with a little toilet roll water. Cleaned myself up and left scuttery boxers rolled up hidden Behind the bowl. And strolled out like a boss

You left out a few sneaky words and punctuation in that story too didn't ya? Made for hard reading :P

stalebread

DVDM93 wrote: »

You left out a few sneaky words and punctuation in that story too didn't ya? Made for hard reading :P

Sorry

keith16

Jurys Hotel charge for wi-fi so I usually just go to the bar and say, "hey man, I left my code up in the room, do you have a spare one handy?"

Works every time, it's amazing how far confidence can get you. In this case, free wifi. So not that amazing I guess. But you see where I'm coming from.

DVDM93

stalebread wrote: »

Sorry

I love you x

csallmighty

So one night I was texting a girl I knew at about 2 in the morning. She tells me she's home alone and wants the d but she lives miles away. So I sneak into the kitchen and get the keys to my mums car and climbed out my room window and pushed the car a few metres away so nobody would hear me starting it up. Spent the next two hours at her house then drove back and pushed the car perfectly back into place and climbed back in the widow. Got up for school the next morning completely wrecked but it was worth it.

DVDM93

keith16 wrote: »

Jurys Hotel charge for wi-fi so I usually just go to the bar and say, "hey man, I left my code up in the room, do you have a spare one handy?"

Works every time, it's amazing how far confidence can get you. In this case, free wifi. So not that amazing I guess. But you see where I'm coming from.

Sneaky ****ers charging for wifi.

keith16

DVDM93 wrote: »

Sneaky ****ers charging for wifi.

Actually yeah.

I love you too x

Crumpets

Puked all over a new Penney's dress at a college party last year. Decided I didn't like the dress anymore and wasn't arsed washing it. Somehow managed to successfully return it to Penney's for a full refund. :pac:

DazMarz

I wore sneakers (for sneaking!) and stole the world's largest Cubic Zirconia out from under the nose of the vigilantes guarding the place. Then, once captured, I convinced everyone in the town that there were millions of dollars buried under a big "T". I made my escape thereafter.

F1ngers

EoghanIRL wrote: »

Put coffee in cup and tell cashier it's tea because it's cheaper.

I'll see your coffee and raise you two sausages, two rashers and a hash brown.

Sam Kade

When my brother and I were young we decided to cut each others hair. I said that I would cut his first which I did and made a complete b@lls of it, he said right your turn now I declined and ran away

Duff

Years ago when WWF: Smackdown and Resident Evil 2 were just out for the Playstation, my uncle brought me home the games from America. However, as the Playstation games in the US and Europe are different, they wouldn't play on my Playstation. So I had this brainwave - went into Xtravision, rented the games out and swapped them out for my US region games. Poor sods who rented them out next.

Brego888

Duff wrote: »

Years ago when WWF: Smackdown and Resident Evil 2 were just out for the Playstation, my uncle brought me home the games from America. However, as the Playstation games in the US and Europe are different, they wouldn't play on my Playstation. So I had this brainwave - went into Xtravision, rented the games out and swapped them out for my US region games. Poor sods who rented them out next.

That is genius.

Un Croissant

Duff wrote: »

Years ago when WWF: Smackdown and Resident Evil 2 were just out for the Playstation, my uncle brought me home the games from America. However, as the Playstation games in the US and Europe are different, they wouldn't play on my Playstation. So I had this brainwave - went into Xtravision, rented the games out and swapped them out for my US region games. Poor sods who rented them out next.

I do that when I accidently hit my Xbox and it eats the disc up something awful.

Years back when I was with my first ever girlfriend I had three other girls on the go at the same time. Felt like an absolute boss at the time. When found out I only ever admitted to the one she found out about. Kept going with the other two.

God that was nasty nasty **** to do.

Celly Smunt

I don't like chocolate desserts,she does. So when in M&S I sneak a toffee one into the packet and put the other chocolate one in a different pack, she gets her chocolate one and I get a toffee one.

The next person buying them will be left with the same combo.

indigo twist

Celly Smunt wrote: »

I don't like chocolate desserts,she does. So when in M&S I sneak a toffee one into the packet and put the other chocolate one in a different pack, she gets her chocolate one and I get a toffee one.

The next person buying them will be left with the same combo.

That's kind of a nice sneaky thing though! Your deed means that the next loving couple can have a choice of desserts!

(Or a fight over who gets what ... one or the other ...!)

Mint Aero

Ran out of toilet paper so wiped my ass with the housemates towel

Mint Aero

Celly Smunt wrote: »

I don't like chocolate desserts,she does. So when in M&S I sneak a toffee one into the packet and put the other chocolate one in a different pack, she gets her chocolate one and I get a toffee one.

The next person buying them will be left with the same combo.

Why don't you just buy two?

The Purveyor of Truth

Feel bad about this now, genuinely, but..

One night, when I was 16, myself and my mates popped the bonnet on my Dad's car and disconnected the distributor cap so that when he got up for work the next morning, the car wouldn't start. Four or five of us went on the bounce that following day and waited down the end of the road until we seen him now being able to start the car and then ten minutes later someone who was on the same shift as him pulled up and gave him a lift to work.

Then we reconnected the distributor cap and headed off on a road from North Dublin to the Dublin mountains and Tallaght to see The Square which had just been built. Was an insane day and we nearly got killed a few times as I could only just about drive and at least three Guards in different squad cars gave us funny looks. Just about made it back in time before my Dad came back.

Somehow I always got the feeling he knew I did it but he never said anything about it. Sorry Dad.

Miss Lizzie Jones

When I was a teenager my mom had bought a carton of buttermilk and put it into the fridge and she was planning to have some the next day.

Now in our house, buttermilk was a very rare commodity that was bought only when the moon was full on an Indian Summer night in the midst of October after it had rained for 3 full days and 3 full nights. Buttermilk was a magical elixer of life and I loved it. I lusted after it like a teenage boy lusted after his Farrah Fawcett poster in the 70s.

Well there it sat in the refrigerator overnight and it haunted my dreams.

After a restless sleep and a hearty breakfast the next morning, I suddenly found myself alone in the kitchen before heading to school. Now was my chance!!

I downed that container of buttermilk, rinsed the carton out with water, filled it with more water and sat it in the fridge just as if it had never been touched or opened. Then I took off out the door to school.

Let's just say mom wasn't too happy with me when I got home from school and it still makes me laugh to this very day thinking about it.

wp_rathead

When younger put about 40 penny sweets in brown bag.
Tell person at till you have 30 in bag.
Save 10p.

The guilt made them taste better

DVDM93

Miss Lizzie Jones wrote: »

When I was a teenager my mom had bought a carton of buttermilk and put it into the fridge and she was planning to have some the next day.

Now in our house, buttermilk was a very rare commodity that was bought only when the moon was full on an Indian Summer night in the midst of October after it had rained for 3 full days and 3 full nights. Buttermilk was a magical elixer of life and I loved it. I lusted after it like a teenage boy lusted after his Farrah Fawcett poster in the 70s.

Well there it sat in the refrigerator overnight and it haunted my dreams.

After a restless sleep and a hearty breakfast the next morning, I suddenly found myself alone in the kitchen before heading to school. Now was my chance!!

I downed that container of buttermilk, rinsed the carton out with water, filled it with more water and sat it in the fridge just as if it had never been touched or opened. Then I took off out the door to school.

Let's just say mom wasn't too happy with me when I got home from school and it still makes me laugh to this very day thinking about it.

Buttermilk? You dirty dirty bastard.

Titzon Toast

A used to set my own alarm to go off really early in the morning and I'd sneak into the hall, switch off the house alarm, and then hit the trip switch on the ELCB board, thus resetting my Mothers digital alarm clock.
More often than not this would earn me and my brother a day off school.

Also, I used to carefully open all the Christmas crackers and steal the toys and trinkets from them.

That's all I'm willing to admit to at this stage. I'm saving the rest for my death bed.

Teyla Emmagan

Crumpets wrote: »

Puked all over a new Penney's dress at a college party last year. Decided I didn't like the dress anymore and wasn't arsed washing it. Somehow managed to successfully return it to Penney's for a full refund. :pac:

That is just scummy.

Miss Lizzie Jones

DVDM93 wrote: »

Buttermilk? You dirty dirty bastard.

I have no regrets.

Celly Smunt

Mint Aero wrote: »

Why don't you just buy two?

This is marks and spencers here,you buy two.

Mint Aero

Celly Smunt wrote: »

This is marks and spencers here,you buy two.

no no no you're not listening to me, listen, listen now ok you listening? right like why don't you buy the double pack of chocolate and the double pack of toffee?

Celly Smunt

Mint Aero wrote: »

no no no you're not listening to me, listen, listen now ok you listening? right like why don't you buy the double pack of chocolate and the double pack of toffee?

Because then its 15 euro or something for two desserts (well 4). That **** don't sit right with me.

FairytaleGirl

One year I went on sabotage at Easter.

Ate half of alllllll the eggs, kept the uneaten half wrapped in foil at the 'window' of the box so you couldnt tell.


The chocolate coma combined with the confused faces of my brothers and sister on Easter Sunday was completely worth it!

RollieFingers

Celly Smunt wrote: »

I don't like chocolate desserts,she does. So when in M&S I sneak a toffee one into the packet and put the other chocolate one in a different pack, she gets her chocolate one and I get a toffee one.

The next person buying them will be left with the same combo.

Such a **** thing to do and then pass off as "sneaky" when you are too cheap to actually buy the products you want!

Unknown Soldier

My current sneaky thing is to take pictures of crosswords in some newsrags, then print them off in work to do during my lunch.

Miss Lizzie Jones

Unknown Soldier wrote: »

My current sneaky thing is to take pictures of crosswords in some newsrags, then print them off in work to do during my lunch.

Now that is living dangerously!!