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Younger man, older woman (in general)

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    #182
    Lou.m
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,532 ✭✭✭Lou.m


    Joya wrote: »
    you are funny but i must not say that because wibbs may think that i am seeking for validation and so its me who's subconsiously selecting guys like you to write messages like that on this topic :D:D:D

    What comes across to be is that you have a naturally capricious personality type. :) You are ebullient yet you like to retain a distance. What others might mistake for intimacy is genuine politeness and warmth on your part. Some people do not express such warmth in acquaintanceships. You do which is lovely. But it puts you in the position of giving a lot whilst needing not much. It lets you stay emotionally uninvested while still attached.

    That is what comes accross.



    You are flirty and playful. What do you want in a man ? Or do you want one?


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    #183
    Lou.m
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,532 ✭✭✭Lou.m


    Joya wrote: »
    ok, thats very clear

    so as i see majority of you guys here thinks that all of these guys are morons or scu*bags since they were indecent over a period of time to me not telling me or secretly having thoughts....

    that's good to know cause i thought those are good people btw..

    and also, that would qualify me to same category then since, (i had a thread on that before that was closed), yes i am attracted to my much younger flatmate.
    haven't told him and i - again - have no clue if all stuff he does for me are just friendly or there is something more.

    i mean, how can you tell? how can you be absolutely certain.

    i wish i can.

    so because i cannot, i decided a week ago that i will cut those feelings from myself, and behave friendly, told myself "he's way out of my league" to make it easier :)

    or you think i SHOULD tell him immediately, just so i am not a scu*bag as my friends. even since we live together it may make things awkward.

    what i wanted to say with the above story is that life is not just black or white...
    what am i missing here???..... :unsure:

    You are a delightful eel mi lady. Or a catfish who knows.


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    #184
    DeadHand
    Registered Users Posts: 2,719 ✭✭✭DeadHand


    on the river wrote: »
    Firstly calm down.
    Secondly stop using the strawman argument to dilute my statement.
    Thirdly after hours is a place to discuss and debate a post NOT the poster .
    Fourthly grow a pair

    Point out where I used a strawman argument and point out where I discussed and debated a poster, please.

    Is the irony lost on you that in your third point you told me to discuss the post not the poster but in your first and fourth you discussed me personally?

    Can you explain exactly what you mean by "grow a pair" and exactly why you feel I need to "grow a pair"?


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    #185
    lennyloulou
    Registered Users Posts: 344 ✭✭lennyloulou


    neighbour female 47 (keeps herself well, good figure, man mad, overdoes it on the bright lip stick, after 4 bottles of Bud will insult everyone and her mother so everyone runs away from her towards end of a night out) is now entering her third year of a relationship with 26yr old quiet chap.
    He looks like a nephew figure- difficult to describe the dynamic between them but they seem happy so best of luck to them. Every female around is delighted she is off the prowl on other men. an element of jealousy. She was a vulture for young lads in the parish years ago-sick really- actually was caught with 2 brothers, 17yr and 19yr within a month of each other a few years ago.


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    #186
    DeadHand
    Registered Users Posts: 2,719 ✭✭✭DeadHand


    Bob.Carcass wrote: »
    Hey john do you like apples?

    Nah i don't like apples i think they are too sweet

    Well your opinion is wrong!!!"

    Get a grip! opinions cannot be wrong, they are formed by individuals and do not have to contain facts they are simply opinions, saying someone's opinion is wrong is the definition of a pretentious ****ing wanker

    Btw is it against the rules to control more than one account wibbs?

    Anyway off to bed, night gents ;)

    I don't know Wibbs. I simply read the thread.

    Opinions can be wrong. Inarguably when they contain a factually incorrect element or, arguably, are totally irrational/insane they are wrong. It's a grey area, one for the philosophers. I will concede I phrased the post badly.

    Your "pretentious ****ing wanker" remark was unnecessary and obnoxious.


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    #187
    Strawberry Swan
    Registered Users Posts: 183 ✭✭Strawberry Swan


    Joya, in answer to your original question of whether there is anything wrong with younger guys going out with older ladies. No of course not. Just as their isn't anything wrong with older guys going out with younger ladies. But what is wrong is leading guys on and pretending you don't have an effect on them.

    All women know from a very early age how attractive they are to the opposite sex. We learn to spot the signs of their interest which mostly involves looking. They act differently to women they don't find attractive. Why cant you spot these signs? Or do you look for them? You know you are attractive by the amount of guys that come onto you yet you say you are surprised when they do. I find this is very disingenuous of you.

    You seem nice but it really isn't nice to lead your doctor friend on for 5 years. That's really pathetic on his part and really not nice on yours. You should stop contact with him but I doubt you will as this seems to be a habit of yours.

    Bob Carcass: Your view that a young woman with an older man is somehow vulnerable looking is so ridiculous it's almost not worth mentioning. There is absolutely nothing to support that belief. You are right, the abuse women suffer is in the media way more than male abuse but that doesn't mean it occurs way more. Have a read of the Amen website and learn of the things women are capable of doing to men.


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    #188
    Lou.m
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,532 ✭✭✭Lou.m


    Strawberry Swan wrote: »
    Joya, in answer to your original question of whether there is anything wrong with younger guys going out with older ladies. No of course not. Just as their isn't anything wrong with older guys going out with younger ladies. But what is wrong is leading guys on and pretending you don't have an effect on them.

    All women know from a very early age how attractive they are to the opposite sex. We learn to spot the signs of their interest which mostly involves looking. They act differently to women they don't find attractive. Why cant you spot these signs? Or do you look for them? You know you are attractive by the amount of guys that come onto you yet you say you are surprised when they do. I find this is very disingenuous of you.

    You seem nice but it really isn't nice to lead your doctor friend on for 5 years. That's really pathetic on his part and really not nice on yours. You should stop contact with him but I doubt you will as this seems to be a habit of yours.

    Bob Carcass: Your view that a young woman with an older man is somehow vulnerable looking is so ridiculous it's almost not worth mentioning. There is absolutely nothing to support that belief. You are right, the abuse women suffer is in the media way more than male abuse but that doesn't mean it occurs way more. Have a read of the Amen website and learn of the things women are capable of doing to men.

    I have never had groups of men chasing me younger or older. So I have never had to worry about making sure they know where they are.

    All I will say Joya is don't take advantage of anyone. I am sure you wouldn't.


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    #189
    bb1234567
    Registered Users Posts: 5,494 ✭✭✭bb1234567


    Just be happy youre on the older side of the dating scene and guys still find you hot!


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    #190
    Egginacup
    Site Banned Posts: 2,922 ✭✭✭Egginacup


    Joya wrote: »
    Ok sorry I wanted to talk generally about this ..

    I wish I can understand what is goin on in the mind of guys of that age in regard the above because I feel in unease whenever it happens..

    I also do not want to hurt anybody but yes i do have to reject them at some point, and i am thinking it is always better earlier than later. I do have a good time with them when we go out etc, but I do try to be clear and to stress that from my side it is friendship only.

    Perhaps I should not even be a friend as it may give the wrong ideas??

    :unsure:

    what's wrong with any male wanting to be with you? If some 6'2 chisell Adonis, as black as coal, is chasing you, or some powerful Viking ginger or some short romantic lad from Sicily, are you going to have the same silly questions?

    Men like you. Get over it.


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    #191
    Wibbs
    Moderators, Science, Health & Environment Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 60,075 Mod ✭✭✭✭Wibbs


    on the river wrote: »
    Just because you have a high post count. Doesn't allow you to pick roles in members views. Everyone is entitled to there opinions
    Yep but when they bring an opinion to a public forum, online or off they have to accept that others may take a different view. It's got nada to do with postcount. It's the nature of the beast. It's called discussion. If I express an opinion I fully expect it to be challenged. Indeed I hope it will be. That way I learn an opposing position and see whether my opinion has a strong case, or is best modified or even discarded in the light of debate and new information. An attack on an opinion I may hold is not a personal attack on me. Too often people get that bit wrong, or use it as a way to close down any opposing view.
    Bob.Carcass wrote: »
    Get a grip! opinions cannot be wrong
    ...

    Rejoice in the awareness of feeling stupid, for that’s how you end up learning new things. If you’re not aware you’re stupid, you probably are.



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    #192
    Maximus Alexander
    Registered Users Posts: 13,080 ✭✭✭✭Maximus Alexander


    Opinions by definition can't be wrong because they deal with the subjective, but what people describe as their opinion is often not an opinion at all.

    Take for example:
    In my opinion, vaccines cause autism.
    The holocaust didn't happen, that's just my opinion man.

    Those are objectively wrong, and aren't actually opinions.


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    #193
    Wibbs
    Moderators, Science, Health & Environment Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 60,075 Mod ✭✭✭✭Wibbs


    Yep subjectively opinions are right, but objectively they can be right, wrong, or somewhere in between and should expect to be challenged.

    Rejoice in the awareness of feeling stupid, for that’s how you end up learning new things. If you’re not aware you’re stupid, you probably are.



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    #194
    pickarooney
    Moderators, Arts Moderators Posts: 35,101 Mod ✭✭✭✭pickarooney


    Isn't everything subjective though, as we can never know how another perceives the world?


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    #195
    Maximus Alexander
    Registered Users Posts: 13,080 ✭✭✭✭Maximus Alexander


    pickarooney wrote: »
    Isn't everything subjective though, as we can never know how another perceives the world?

    No, coz like, the holocaust did happen.


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    #196
    pickarooney
    Moderators, Arts Moderators Posts: 35,101 Mod ✭✭✭✭pickarooney


    Maximus Alexander wrote: »
    No, coz like, the holocaust did happen.

    No doubt, but without having been there, man, every event that doesn't involve you directly is dependent on your perception of someone else's perception. The sky might be blue but you'll never know what blue looks like to anyone else.


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    #197
    Maximus Alexander
    Registered Users Posts: 13,080 ✭✭✭✭Maximus Alexander


    Not taking the bait. :p


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    #198
    Temporal Loop
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 27 ✭Temporal Loop


    pickarooney wrote: »
    Isn't everything subjective though, as we can never know how another perceives the world?

    Some opinions are subjective some aren't.

    You can have an opinion about the cause of the downed Malaysia plane over Ukraine which can be proved wrong.


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    #199
    pickarooney
    Moderators, Arts Moderators Posts: 35,101 Mod ✭✭✭✭pickarooney


    Maximus Alexander wrote: »
    Not taking the bait. :p

    Grand, I was hoping I wouldn't have to type any more nonsense in any case. Did you watch the cricket last night?:pac:


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    #200
    on the river
    Registered Users Posts: 1,527 ✭✭✭on the river


    DeadHand wrote: »
    Point out where I used a strawman argument and point out where I discussed and debated a poster, please.

    Is the irony lost on you that in your third point you told me to discuss the post not the poster but in your first and fourth you discussed me personally?

    Can you explain exactly what you mean by "grow a pair" and exactly why you feel I need to "grow a pair"?

    The burden of interest is upon you in the way you conduct yourself in this thread.

    You are using the strawman argument continuous to undermine other posters.
    You brought all this upon yourself.
    The last sentence in my previous post speaks for itself.


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    #201
    on the river
    Registered Users Posts: 1,527 ✭✭✭on the river


    Wibbs wrote: »
    Yep but when they bring an opinion to a public forum, online or off they have to accept that others may take a different view. It's got nada to do with postcount. It's the nature of the beast. It's called discussion. If I express an opinion I fully expect it to be challenged. Indeed I hope it will be. That way I learn an opposing position and see whether my opinion has a strong case, or is best modified or even discarded in the light of debate and new information. An attack on an opinion I may hold is not a personal attack on me. Too often people get that bit wrong, or use it as a way to close down any opposing view.

    ...

    Typical. Your posts are stirring up chaos as usual.


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    #202
    DeadHand
    Registered Users Posts: 2,719 ✭✭✭DeadHand


    on the river wrote: »
    The burden of interest is upon you in the way you conduct yourself in this thread.

    You are using the strawman argument continuous to undermine other posters.
    You brought all this upon yourself.
    The last sentence in my previous post speaks for itself.

    I have no idea what a "burden of interest" is or why it is "upon me". Is it a banking term? The burden of proof is on you since you made a claim without offering any evidence or argument to back it up.


    Can you point out where in the thread I employed a strawman man argument. If I'm doing so "continuous" it should be easy, right?

    No, I don't believe the last sentence does "speak for itself". Can you explain how it pertains to me and this thread as it seems like a fairly random statement to me.

    Cheers!


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    #203
    Ken Shamrock
    Registered Users Posts: 3,192 ✭✭✭Ken Shamrock


    This thread is becoming so tedious, not even going to quote anyone, again like MA stated opinions cannot be a wrong, if you say IMO China is in Europe the statement is wrong, because it is an incorrect fact, not an opinion.

    So i really don't know what anyone is trying to get at? "There is nothing to support MY belief?" "Opinions can be wrong when they are insane" what are you people on? This thread was about Joya wanting advice and instead it's become an argument because people have inflated ego's and want to look intelligent on the internet.

    Unlike Wibbs i will actually have no further involvement in this thread because my ego is not going to hurt by someone's comments :rolleyes:

    I'll end on a few facts, Wibbs and Deadhand have never been online at the same time, Deadhand has never started a thread on here, Deadhand only posts in threads that Wibbs is involved in and has no personality or recurring traits other than commenting to back up Wibbs opinions.

    May be a massive coincidence but if alt accounts are not allowed on boards i suggest a mod look into the IP Address used on both accounts.

    Joya best of luck with your situation.


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    #204
    neamhspleachi
    Closed Accounts Posts: 347 ✭✭neamhspleachi


    Bob.Carcass wrote: »
    Wibbs and Deadhand have never been online at the same time, Deadhand has never started a thread on here, Deadhand only posts in threads that Wibbs is involved in and has no personality or recurring traits other than commenting to back up Wibbs opinions.

    May be a massive coincidence but if alt accounts are not allowed on boards i suggest a mod look into the IP Address used on both accounts.
    Conspiracy theory forum >


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    #205
    DeadHand
    Registered Users Posts: 2,719 ✭✭✭DeadHand


    Bob.Carcass wrote: »
    I'll end on a few facts, Wibbs and Deadhand have never been online at the same time, Deadhand has never started a thread on here, Deadhand only posts in threads that Wibbs is involved in and has no personality or recurring traits other than commenting to back up Wibbs opinions.

    May be a massive coincidence but if alt accounts are not allowed on boards i suggest a mod look into the IP Address used on both accounts.

    Joya best of luck with your situation.

    Sure, we're like Superman and Clark Kent that way.

    Most of those aren't facts. If you'd look at my post history closely you'd discover that I've posted on several threads Wibbs was not involved in, we've been online at the same time often and I present my own opinions far more than I backup Wibbs'. In fact, as far as I recall, this thread has been the first time I've backed him up on anything. You're talking nonsense, I'm afraid.

    Anyways, if you have allegations or complaints to make, bring them to the mods instead of grandstanding and ranting on the thread to undermine other posters.


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    #206
    Muise...
    Closed Accounts Posts: 4,512 ✭✭✭Muise...


    neamhspleachi wrote: »
    Conspiracy theory forum >

    :pac:

    Meanwhile the OP watches the knights jousting under her window, twirling a lock of her hair with one hand, scrolling pm's with the other...


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    #207
    Wibbs
    Moderators, Science, Health & Environment Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 60,075 Mod ✭✭✭✭Wibbs


    on the river wrote: »
    Typical. Your posts are stirring up chaos as usual.
    by offering an opposing opinion to some? That's chaos? Well I never.
    Muise... wrote: »
    :pac:

    Meanwhile the OP watches the knights jousting under her window, twirling a lock of her hair with one hand, scrolling pm's with the other...
    I was just thinking that. Get out of my head. :pac: Then again you might be another one of my aliases... >_>

    Rejoice in the awareness of feeling stupid, for that’s how you end up learning new things. If you’re not aware you’re stupid, you probably are.



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    #208
    Maximus Alexander
    Registered Users Posts: 13,080 ✭✭✭✭Maximus Alexander


    Wibbs wrote: »
    I was just thinking that. Get out of my head. :pac: Then again you might be another one of my aliases... >_>

    Wibbs, I really enjoy our discussions but could you not just do it all under one account? Pretending that it's not just the two of us in this thread is getting tiresome.

    :pac:


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    #209
    Muise...
    Closed Accounts Posts: 4,512 ✭✭✭Muise...


    Maximus Alexander wrote: »
    Wibbs, I really enjoy our discussions but could you not just do it all under one account? Pretending that it's not just the two of us in this thread is getting tiresome.

    :pac:

    What? Don't be so paranoid...

    Sh1t, wrong log-in. O-o


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    #210
    Joya
    Closed Accounts Posts: 6,365 ✭✭✭Joya


    Muise... wrote: »
    :pac:

    Meanwhile the OP watches the knights jousting under her window, twirling a lock of her hair with one hand, scrolling pm's with the other...

    hahah, yea i just got up /o\ and well i have to say i will have to go through the thread all over again to figure out what's happening here as who is thinking what and who said what as it became a little hard to follow for me i have to admit :-)


    edit: i mean i do not mind watchin' (read: reading) a good fight :d)) as long as at least the participants know what they are fighting for :d))
    i hope they do! :)


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    #211
    Muise...
    Closed Accounts Posts: 4,512 ✭✭✭Muise...


    Joya wrote: »
    hahah, yea i just got up /o\ and well i have to say i will have to go through the thread all over again to figure out what's happening here as who is thinking what and who said what as it became a little hard to follow for me i have to admit :-)


    edit: i mean i do not mind watchin' (read: reading) a good fight :d)) as long as at least the participants know what they are fighting for :d))
    i hope they do! :)

    TL;DR:

    well done silvermilftroll.


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