People who think they're brilliant with the opposite sex when they really aren't....

Hotfail.com

I know a guy who thinks every single girl he ever comes across wants to get in his pants, I actually feel embarrassed for him whenever he starts to talk about stuff like that but he's so oblivious to the reality that I just can't help but laugh.. I wouldn't mind, but he's about 15 stone and smells like sweat most of the time :pac: He's come out with some absolute classics to me as well, obviously bullsh*t though..

I was in Dublin at the weekend and these girls kept coming up to me and saying "I want you" (keep in mind he was there on a weekend break with his mother and little sister...)

When I was in the train station earlier this girl sat across from me and spread her legs, I'm too good for her though.

*After buying something in the shop* That girl at the cashier touched my hand when I handed her my money, I think I'll get the shift later.

He also thinks any girl looking in his direction is frothing for him. It would be really annoying if it wasn't cringe The thing that makes it as bad as it is is that he's 19 and I know for a fact he's never have a girlfriend.... :rolleyes:

Now that I look back on it maybe you just had to be there to get how annoying/funny it was but fúck it..

You know anyone like this AH?

Arthur Beesley

Jealous much?

You should take lessons from him, rather that dissing him. Shame on you.

Zed Bank

Maybe he's just messing? Lots of lads (including myself) make a joke about the lack of success with the women :O

Cantremember

Can't say I do. Know a fair few oul b****es though.

beano345

Ha sounds like a fella I work with,even the getting the change handed back to him.he's in his forties and I reckon he's going through a mid life crisis,I swear this man cannot leave the house without unwanted female attention.funny thing is he makes it out like its some kind of affliction!

Hotfail.com

Zed Bank wrote: »

Maybe he's just messing? Lots of lads (including myself) make a joke about the lack of success with the women :O

It's not messing, if he was messing a bit of questioning wouldn't enrage him would it?

Daveysil15

Hotfail.com wrote: »

You know anyone like this AH?

Yeah this guy.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1t01uTnnhcw

urabell

It's funny how its the little things in life
That mean the most
Not where you live or what you drive
Or the price tag on your clothes
There's no dollar sign on peace of mind
This I've come to know

peekachoo

It's funny cause the attitudes you mentioned would repel most women than draw them in.
Or is it a reverse psychology thing. Maybe he's actually a genius.

Shakespeare's Sister

Hotfail.com wrote: »

The thing that makes it as bad as it is is that he's 19 and I know for a fact he's never have a girlfriend.... :rolleyes:

I thought you were gonna say he's 40 or something.

Gannicus

I'll go one better OP.

Most of my mates (in one of my social circles) sit there telling rape and dead hooker jokes (or a combo of the two) till the cows come home and spend most of the night saying how they'd "bang the shít outta" girls they know and how "knee deep in gash" they're going to be at the end of the night if we head out.

When we go out and maybe one or two of them (and on the odd occasion myself) strike up a chat with a girl while the rest are huddled in a corner saying how we (the rest of us) "get so much ass". For the record we get very little, but we try.

Then to make matters worse, they then think its funny to tell girls either you have a gf (when I don't) or some sort of STI or they try and bring the girl home themselves at the end of the night thus wrecking it for the person who was actually chatting her up or trying to get her number.

Hotfail.com

Gannicus wrote: »

I'll go one better OP.

Most of my mates (in one of my social circles) sit there telling rape and dead hooker jokes (or a combo of the two) till the cows come home and spend most of the night saying how they'd "bang the shít outta" girls they know and how "knee deep in gash" they're going to be at the end of the night if we head out.

When we go out and maybe one or two of them (and on the odd occasion myself) strike up a chat with a girl while the rest are huddled in a corner saying how we (the rest of us) "get so much ass". For the record we get very little, but we try.

Then to make matters worse, they then think its funny to tell girls either you have a gf (when I don't) or some sort of STI or they try and bring the girl home themselves at the end of the night thus wrecking it for the person who was actually chatting her up or trying to get her number.

They just sound like cúnts.:p

Zed Bank

Zed Bank wrote: »

Maybe he's just messing? Lots of lads (including myself) make a joke about the lack of success with the women :O

Yeah the one with the girl at a checkout counter sounds like what I would say. Usually I'd combine it with Mark from Peep Show and say that I know she's definitely the one.

Spunge

Gannicus wrote: »

how "knee deep in gash" they're going to be at the end of the night if

:pac::pac::pac:

Shakespeare's Sister

Gannicus wrote: »

I'll go one better OP.

Most of my mates (in one of my social circles) sit there telling rape and dead hooker jokes (or a combo of the two) till the cows come home and spend most of the night saying how they'd "bang the shít outta" girls they know and how "knee deep in gash" they're going to be at the end of the night if we head out.

When we go out and maybe one or two of them (and on the odd occasion myself) strike up a chat with a girl while the rest are huddled in a corner saying how we (the rest of us) "get so much ass". For the record we get very little, but we try.

Then to make matters worse, they then think its funny to tell girls either you have a gf (when I don't) or some sort of STI or they try and bring the girl home themselves at the end of the night thus wrecking it for the person who was actually chatting her up or trying to get her number.

They're definitely on Boards!

_Whimsical_

Women do it too but are less sexually crude about it. I know a girl who thinks every man who makes eye contact with her is a "smitten kitten" for her...everyone who says hello or passes and acknowledges her is referenced later in the day as "aww he is such a skitter kitten ,it's so cute but I wouldn't go there". It must be a grand little bubble to exist in all the same though.

Gannicus

Hotfail.com wrote: »

They just sound like cúnts.:p

They're alright bar all of my previous post.

They grew up in very sheltered childhoods. Even to this day all in our late 20's they are still extremely wet behind the ear. Really its laughable until they think you're the subjet of the joke.

Magaggie wrote: »

They're definitely on Boards!

Close (ish) 4chan

Shakespeare's Sister

Gannicus wrote: »

Close (ish) 4chan

Not good.

I heard a girl say once that a guy "must be gay" because he wasn't interested in her. :pac:

DoozerT6

OP, maybe your friend is very aware of his lack of success with women and is just trying to 'talk himself up.' He knows he's talking bull**** as much as you do.

magentis

Fair play to him.
At least he has a pair of balls.
There is a lot of guys out there that could do with his confidence

Riddle101

Yep have a friend like that, or rather I did(Don't really talk to him anymore). But yeah he was one of those types alright. Making up stories about women and all, thinking he was all that with the ladies, even though he had a bad hygiene problem.

One story he told me was that he once had a girl in his room. He heard his mom coming up the stairs so he had her climb out the bedroom window and down a ladder. It was hilariously ridiculous, and we took the p*ss out of him for ages after that. Even made a song about it.

But that's just the tip of the ice berg about him. Guy is crazy. Once he stripped naked and walked into a takeaway and tried to order some food. He also did it on a bus once. The funny thing was, he wasn't even doing it on a bet or anything, he just did it because he thought it was funny.

He also urinated on the door of Marks and Spenser on Mary Street one night and got arrested, and a court summons for it, and while he was dealing with the gardaí he got all confrontational with them as well, calling them "Pigs".

He wrote a book that never got published, but for good reason because the book was really bad and was just about him doing all these mad things, and killing people. He called the book Shotgun 1/2.

He was very quick to anger as well, and countless times he lost the head with people and started shouting at them. He was in the Gym once, and one of the instructors there tried to give him advice because he was doing something wrong, but he just flipped out and started shouting at him.

He threw a rock through someone's window once because he didn't like the guy who lived in his house. Although the guy knew it was him who broke the window, confronted him sometime later on, and gave him a few digs in the face and a black eye.

In secondary school he also threw rocks at another guy's house who he had some beef with. During this beef, one day at school he punched the guy in the back of the head at break-time. They scheduled a fight later on after school, but nothing ever happened. He brought brass knuckles with him to use in the fight, and the other guy decided it was safer not to turn up.

I could go on all day about this guy but i'll leave it there.

Arthur Beesley

_Whimsical_ wrote: »

Women do it too but are less sexually crude about it. I know a girl who thinks every man who makes eye contact with her is a "smitten kitten" for her...everyone who says hello or passes and acknowledges her is referenced later in the day as "aww he is such a skitter kitten ,it's so cute but I wouldn't go there". It must be a grand little bubble to exist in all the same though.

Is she hot?

mad muffin

OP your friend?

Day Lewin

Arrah goodness---

Big mouth = small willy. Everyone knows that. We used to have a saying for them, "all mouth and trousers"
Heaven help him...whenever he finally gets a real woman, if he should be so lucky, he will put a stop to all that talk!

But in the meantime, it would be the action of a true friend to -
A. mention tactfully that regular bathing is a lot more attractive to women, and
B. - that pointless boasting makes him sound like a bigmouth and is nearly as off-putting as the poor hygiene.

Wishiwasa Littlebitaller

Reminds me of this Boardsie:

http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?=743264506

GalwayGuy2

Meh, I guess until you've been with a women you'll find it very hard to separate politeness/friendliness from flirtatiousness.

Hotfail.com

mad muffin wrote: »

OP you're friend?

Mad Muffin, I am friend.

Fiolina

Wishiwasa Littlebitaller wrote: »

Reminds me of this Boardsie:

http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?=743264506

I fall for this every time:o

mad muffin

Hotfail.com wrote: »

Mad Muffin, I am friend.

:P

Spunge

Id rather be ignorant to the fact that im bad with the opposite sex than horribly aware of it

yournerd

I hate guys who crave attention.

Lou.m

I don't think there is such a thing as being good with the opposite sex.

There are just people who are good together. Chemistry or whatever.

Sexy feelings between ya.

If you are good with people and understand them and care about them that helps.

And being attractive helps.

But yeah usually people who actually think this is a ' thing ' are just not very aware and yes have led very sheltered lives.

They get to 35 and still have never had a long term relationship.

I know girls who think any guy who does something nice for them fancies them. And guys who think antics impress women.

Shock horror ...being a nice person being happy with yourself and kind to the other person helps !! But you also need the chemistry.

And you can't be good at it ....just let it happen...love is easier if you believe in it. And you don't have a chance at true love if you don't believe in it.

Day Lewin

@Lou.m - I would respectfully beg to disagree

Social norms of behaviour are subtle, and not at all as visible to some people as to others.
It is possible to suffer for years with loneliness and failure, just for want of being taught some simple rules.
They are really not apparent to everyone, although those who have the gift of social confidence are usually unaware of this fact: they may think that the behaviour is inherent or "natural", they may deny that there are any rules, they may blithely recommend "being yourself"; but to a person who is socially clumsy, gauche and unsuccessful, being taught the rules - and most acceptable customary practices - can make a world of difference. #voiceofexperience

- and can certainly make a HUGE difference to one's success rating with the opposite sex!

Daveysil15

Lou.m wrote: »

But yeah usually people who actually think this is a ' thing ' are just not very aware and yes have led very sheltered lives.

katemarch wrote: »

but to a person who is socially clumsy, gauche and unsuccessful, being taught the rules - and most acceptable customary practices - can make a world of difference. #voiceofexperience

Or... maybe they just haven't met anyone compatible. Not everyone who has been single for a long time has a problem that they need to work on. A lot of it can be just down to bad luck.

Fat Christy

:cool:

Fat Christy

GalwayGuy2 wrote: »

Meh, I guess until you've been with a women you'll find it very hard to separate politeness/friendliness from flirtatiousness.

Ah come on, I've been best friends with 2 guys since I was 13 and I didn't get into a relationship until I was 19. You don't have to get with someone to know the difference between flirting and friendliness.

Lou.m

Louis108 wrote: »

Sweet Jesus, how can anyone think "there is no such thing as being good with the opposite sex"?

It is blatantly obviously some people are better at flirting with and attracting the opposite sex. It's a skill that you can get better at.

No they aren't. And no you can't.

You are who you are. And it is YOU that someone will truly feel for.

You can be good with people and you can be a nice person. That will by default make you better with the opposite sex.

Believe it or not flirting is 1% of being 'good with the opposite sex'.

Most flirting is done WITHIN a relationship..not to start one.

If someone is responding to flirting they are responding to the person doing it.

Anyone who uses the term success rating with the opposite sex has issues quite frankly.

Believing in true love really DOES make love easier.

And agreed Daveysil15 a lot of singles have NOTHING wrong with them.

Really being a nice kind confident and happy person is the best you can do.

humberklog

Woohoo! It's gotta be the school summer holidays!

Louis108

Lou.m wrote: »

No they aren't. And no you can't.

You are who you are. And it is YOU that someone will truly feel for.

You can be good with people and you can be a nice person. That will by default make you better with the opposite sex.

Believe it or not flirting is 1% of being 'good with the opposite sex'.

Most flirting is done WITHIN a relationship..not to start one.

If someone is responding to flirting they are responding to the person doing it.

Anyone who uses the term success rating with the opposite sex has issues quite frankly.

Believing in true love really DOES make love easier.

And agreed Daveysil15 a lot of singles have NOTHING wrong with them.

Really being a nice kind confident and happy person is the best you can do.

You're living in cloud cuckoo land.

Some people are just better at attracting the opposite sex, they say the right things, they have the right body language, they read signals well etc.

PS What the fup is up with your weird paragraphs?

wretcheddomain

Hotfail.com wrote: »

I know a guy who thinks every single girl he ever comes across wants to get in his pants, I actually feel embarrassed for him

You know anyone like this AH?

You're probably describing yourself OP, did you forget what you chose as your username by the way? :rolleyes: That pretty much gave it away.

Yurt

Lou.m wrote: »

No they aren't. And no you can't.

You are who you are. And it is YOU that someone will truly feel for.

You can be good with people and you can be a nice person. That will by default make you better with the opposite sex.

Believe it or not flirting is 1% of being 'good with the opposite sex'.

Most flirting is done WITHIN a relationship..not to start one.

If someone is responding to flirting they are responding to the person doing it.

Anyone who uses the term success rating with the opposite sex has issues quite frankly.

Believing in true love really DOES make love easier.

And agreed Daveysil15 a lot of singles have NOTHING wrong with them.

Really being a nice kind confident and happy person is the best you can do.

Thats cute...

PS what's with the paragraphs

Fat Christy

wretcheddomain wrote: »

You're probably describing yourself OP, did you forget what you chose as your username by the way? :rolleyes: That pretty much gave it away.

I don't think so. I can safely say, Hotfail does not fit into the category he describes. :cool:

Czarcasm

Louis108 wrote: »

PS What the fup is up with your weird paragraphs?

Yurt wrote: »

PS what's with the paragraphs

What's

wrong

with

Lou's

paragraphs?

I

can

read

them

easily.


OP I've known plenty of guys like your friend, and I've known plenty of guys who laughed at them, while not realizing that's really all the person wanted - somebody to notice them, didn't matter what their reaction.

Simply stop giving your friend attention for his stupidity and he'll cop himself on...





eventually.

Chancer3001

Lou is living in dream land.

Even the guy with 5 posts knows what's up

Lou.m

Czarcasm wrote: »

What's

wrong

with

Lou's

paragraphs?

I

can

read

them

easily.


OP I've known plenty of guys like your friend, and I've known plenty of guys who laughed at them, while not realizing that's really all the person wanted - somebody to notice them, didn't matter what their reaction.

Simply stop giving your friend attention for his stupidity and he'll cop himself on...





eventually.

Awh thanks ...


From now one know that I will write them that way for you.

:)


Oi you two..
Louis108 Yurt ...cranky pants

PEACE and chill.

I have a differing opinion to you both and it stands. You are free to disagree of course. You would do in graciously if you had enough confidence in your opinions and conviction that they would stand up without pettiness.

Flirting is 1 % of how you get into a relationship ..I really think that people have to be good with PEOPLE in general and relationships (like with family and friends) and have good emotional intelligence and vast life experience to draw on.

You can't read that. Or improve on it in a few weeks. It takes life to teach you how to be good at some things. The short cuts of self help mumbo jumbo will end up making the journey longer.

Chancer3001

Reading posts like that makes me feel smug.

I have a big smug head on me right now.

Lou.m

Chancer3001 wrote: »

Lou is living in fairyland.

Even the guy with 5 posts knows what's up

Fixed your post.

FAIRYLAND

AND DON'T F**K WITH FAIRIES MOTHE****ERS.....

SH*T gets sparkly

Chancer3001

Ok.....

Lou.m

Chancer3001 wrote: »

Ok.....

You want some sparkle with that OK?????

lertsnim

Wishiwasa Littlebitaller wrote: »

Reminds me of this Boardsie:

http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?=743264506

I got a login page. Who is it?

Lou.m

lertsnim wrote: »

I got a login page. Who is it?

Login in to your facebook to see....

It is all of us...poetic ...IT IS ALL OF US

WOW..... that is like ...deep