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Online Dating
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29-06-2014 4:11pm#1
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Sol.MB, there is an Online Dating forum here on Boards
You have to have (I think) a minimum of 50 posts to get access, and you have to PM one of the moderators of the forum for access also, try PMing Miamee or Knucklehead6. You'll get lots of advice and be able to vent/rant there! 0 -
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OP: Online dating is kinda like real life dating in many ways. There's aholes online just like in real life and there's good guys online just like in real life. It's just an easier way to meet people.
I met my wife online. :P
Be safe, especially if you're female. Always meet in a very public area. Never go anywhere alone with a guy untill you trust him. I'm not saying online dating is dagnerous or anything anymore than normal dating but better safe than sorry is all. Alot of people have met their spouses online.
I was bored once I wanted female company. Like just company, a cute girl to go cinema with so I went on craigslist dublin and a few days later I went cinema with a really sweet girl. Other times, I got msg from gay people saying disgusting things to me which I can't repeat her or else i'd be banned, but if you don't mind the odd dope you'll find someone nice online.
Last time I went on craigslist dublin, I met an American girl (American girls are CRAZY for Irish lads, there's more Americans on craigslist dublin dating than Irish girls, met up with her, been with her ever since. We love each other alot
I hope you meet someone nice. If you need any more advice feel free to PM me. (Mod; I'm not asking anyone to PM me. I'm saying if you should feel the need to, feel free.)0 -
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Don't expect desert before you even go for a meal! lol
Exactly! I went onto POF in the hope of getting a few fun dates, that could lead to intimacy. Why is that soooo hard to find? Do these guys really think that a few dirty messages is going to have you ripping your clothes off and jumping in to bed with them?! It kind of reminds me of the last 20 minutes of Coppers
It's like as soon as you tell them you're not going to be a booty call that their like "ooooh she's looking for a serious relationship". There is a middle ground. 0 -
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Moderators, Social & Fun Moderators, Regional East Moderators, Regional North West Moderators Posts: 12,526 Mod ✭✭✭✭
Join Date:Posts: 11725
Sol.MB, pay close attention to people's profiles. Some people may say they are looking for long-term dating when they aren't but a lot of the time they will fill in that they are looking for "friends" or "casual dating" or similar, i.e. no commitment but they may not explicitly say they are looking for an intimate encounter - even though they are.
Also be very upfront about what you are looking for in your profile (if you haven't already). If you're not sure, maybe get a friend to have a read over it and see what they think.
Unfortunately, no matter how careful you are there will still be people who say they want one thing because they think it's what you want to hear or else they just change their mind. It happens.
There are lots of genuine people on OD however now that it is a lot more mainstream and popular the percentage of people wasting time, boosting their egos and generally just on it for the laugh instead of to find someone has also increased hugely. You have to kiss a lot more frogs to find your prince(ss) these days 0 -
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ShowMeTheCash wrote: »To give one example, I remember meeting a lady for a drink, we met we said hello, we ordered a drink and started chatting usual stuff, but within about an hour I basically had this chick tell me she needs to know if this could go somewhere as she did not want to waste her time......
.:D:D Omg what a looper!! 0 -
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Thought you all would appreciate this. I was supposed to be going on a dinner date with a guy from Pof tonight. He's just messaged me a couple of hours ago saying he was really sorry but he needed to cancel as he's just found out he's got chlamydia ðŸ˜႒ and here was me thinking we where just going for dinner 😜
Oh that's real nice that is!
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Charming!
I was using POF for a while earlier this year, but got a bit tired of it. My last date on it was going very well until the guy pulled a massive sulk because I refused to go home with him on the first date. It's very clear on my profile that I'm looking for dating/ a relationship so he clearly hadn't bothered to check, or maybe he thought that I'd be desperate enough! Needless to say, there was no further contact from either of us after that unpleasant standoff!
As it turns out, I met a lovely random guy who lives in London at Glastonbury a few weeks ago, and he's planning a little visit to Dublin in a few weeks to see me. Watch this space!
So, I agree with castaway_lady; don't abandon your normal standards, and don't use it as your only method of meeting people... and remember, 'Just keep swimming!'0 -
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Another date that was a waste of time. Guy started the night off asking about how Tinder was going for me and basically tips on how to meet people. Grand I said, this is just conversation, a common ground on how we met. Was a funny guy but bordering on smart ass. Started saying if there is no chemistry on dates then there is no point, it's like talking to your sister.... I said to myself, waste of time. Told him about another date where the guy spend the entire time talking about himself and then nothing at the end of the night, no kiss, hug, just basically ran away lol. And he thought that was weird and he ended up doing the same thing really.
Now everyone reading this probably thinks I pounced or scared them off in someway but I really don't think I did. I was interested in him and now I'm just pissed off with myself. These dates etch away at your confidence whether you like it or not. A first date basically requires you to give a run down of yourself. After doing six"First" dates in two months I wonder what I am doing wrong. Is it my height, weight, hair, teeth, and worst of all my personality. I can;t change who I am! I don't try too hard on these dates where I would seem like I'm bordering on eager.
I just hope there is someone decent out there to share the good times with 0 -
Another date that was a waste of time. Guy started the night off asking about how Tinder was going for me and basically tips on how to meet people. Grand I said, this is just conversation, a common ground on how we met. Was a funny guy but bordering on smart ass. Started saying if there is no chemistry on dates then there is no point, it's like talking to your sister.... I said to myself, waste of time. Told him about another date where the guy spend the entire time talking about himself and then nothing at the end of the night, no kiss, hug, just basically ran away lol. And he thought that was weird and he ended up doing the same thing really.
Now everyone reading this probably thinks I pounced or scared them off in someway but I really don't think I did. I was interested in him and now I'm just pissed off with myself. These dates etch away at your confidence whether you like it or not. A first date basically requires you to give a run down of yourself. After doing six"First" dates in two months I wonder what I am doing wrong. Is it my height, weight, hair, teeth, and worst of all my personality. I can;t change who I am! I don't try too hard on these dates where I would seem like I'm bordering on eager.
I just hope there is someone decent out there to share the good times with
If you wanted to kiss him, why did you leave it to him to initiate it? You could have made the first move and he would most likely have responded positively.
I'm an online dater in my mid 30's and it amazes me how women keep their cards so close to their chest on these dates, I'm chatty and personable so my dates tend to go well, I've no problem getting dates, although am not looking for anything hugely serious at the mo, but it never fails to amaze me how women I go on dates with these days, and these tend to be proper dinner dates, they're often obviously very nervous, up tight, one huge romance killer I have to say, is that they are often highly suspicious/paranoid/cynical, a lot of this may stem from the sheer number of arséholes and liars that are online these days, people pretending they are single when they are actually married or in a relationship.
If guys are not pursuing a 2nd date with you, then you should step back and examine where the problem might be. If your pics are recent and are clearly a fair and reasonable reflection of what you look like, then the cause of the poor results you are seeing, is unlikely to be anything to do with your appearance, but more to do with how you are presenting on a date. Guys pick up on the tiniest of things, if you are nervous, it's a romance killer on a date, as is cynicism and boring conversation. I'm not saying that you are any of these things, but my best advice to you is don't be afraid to loosen up a bit on a date, don't be afraid to flirt a bit too, guys need signals and when it comes to internet dates, the barriers for some reason are often kept up very high, I've been on dates where it felt more like an interview. Don't forget that it is a date, it is meant to be romantic, flirty, giddy, mischievous and basically it's meant to be fun!
Also, if you don't get a kiss on a first date, if the conversation was good and if you thought the guy treated you respectfully, basically I suppose the best way of putting this is that if you haven't regretted giving him 2-3 hours of your life that evening for a date, don't be afraid to suggest or explore the option of meeting him again, I personally find first date kisses notoriously difficult for all the reasons I set out above, I'm warm and personable and chatty but underneath when it comes to first kisses, I'm a bit shy, women rarely legislate for how difficult it can be to initiate a first kiss, because it is always left to the guy!0 -
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Moderators, Social & Fun Moderators, Regional East Moderators, Regional North West Moderators Posts: 12,526 Mod ✭✭✭✭ Join Date:Posts: 11725
Another date that was a waste of time. Guy started the night off asking about how Tinder was going for me and basically tips on how to meet people. Grand I said, this is just conversation, a common ground on how we met. Was a funny guy but bordering on smart ass. Started saying if there is no chemistry on dates then there is no point, it's like talking to your sister.... I said to myself, waste of time. Told him about another date where the guy spend the entire time talking about himself and then nothing at the end of the night, no kiss, hug, just basically ran away lol. And he thought that was weird and he ended up doing the same thing really.
Now everyone reading this probably thinks I pounced or scared them off in someway but I really don't think I did. I was interested in him and now I'm just pissed off with myself. These dates etch away at your confidence whether you like it or not. A first date basically requires you to give a run down of yourself. After doing six"First" dates in two months I wonder what I am doing wrong. Is it my height, weight, hair, teeth, and worst of all my personality. I can;t change who I am! I don't try too hard on these dates where I would seem like I'm bordering on eager.
I just hope there is someone decent out there to share the good times with
I know some people can be nervous on dates but talking about previous dates on a first date is usually not a good idea. A bit like not complaining about your previous employer in a job interview :P
However - if you want kisses, hugs or anything else at the end of a date, you need to either a) initiate it, b) ask for one (usually works :pac:) or c) make it plainly obvious that you are interested so that he might make a move. And I mean VERY obvious. Perhaps your idea of not trying too hard looks to others like you just aren't interested?0 -
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