Being Shouted at in the Street

Lux23

Azwaldo55 wrote: »

If I were homosexual I might. I'm sure homosexual men enjoy being whooped at by other gays. Not very familiar with how gay men behave toward eachother but I am sure they have their own macho way of acting the maggot.
If a bunch of gay guys were calling after me I would be flattered maybe.:)

I'm telling you, you will feel dirty and embarrassed because having a stranger comment on your looks or body in public is disgusting. You really are clueless!!

Neyite

eviltwin wrote: »

We've evolved a bit since cavemen I hope. Would you condone shouting abuse in general or just towards women?

Pffft. Keep up.

He's moved onto the Gays now. They love it too dontcha know. Next up is probably the disabled. Or black people. Or both.

Lux23

Azwaldo55 wrote: »

You can complain all you want.
Won't change a thing
Boys will be boys.
In the war the British complained about Americans being oversexed overpaid and over here. American boys on leave would wreck the place getting blind drunk fighting each other and fighting over women.
Men in a group act like a band of brothers and behave outrageously.
This kind of carry on goes on stag nights, after rugby and soccer games and when sailors and soldiers are passing through.

If you think this will ever change you might as well ask for water not to be wet.

But this has changed, lots of men are capable of having a good night out without a fight or verbally sexually assaulting anyone.

eviltwin

Azwaldo55 wrote: »

You can complain all you want.
Won't change a thing
Boys will be boys.
In the war the British complained about Americans being oversexed overpaid and over here. American boys on leave would wreck the place getting blind drunk fighting each other and fighting over women.
Men in a group act like a band of brothers and behave outrageously.
This kind of carry on goes on stag nights, after rugby and soccer games and when sailors and soldiers are passing through.

If you think this will ever change you might as well ask for water not to be wet.

do you engage in this kind of behaviour yourself?

Most people are capable of moving beyond the pack mentality, if they choose to.

Make no mistake, men who behave like that do so out of choice. It's not something they're unable to resist. If you behave like an abusive lout, it's because you want to. And you're putting your 'fun' over someone elses sense of security, disrespecting them and intruding on their day in a very unwelcome way.

If you want to keep doing that, I can't stop you. But you can.

Azwaldo55

byrned17 wrote: »

You know what else has been happening since the beginning of time?

Gang rape. Domestic violence. Pedophilia. Marital rape.

Groups of boisterous men who whoop at passing women while on a stag night are the kind of men who would kick the living sh*t out of rapists and pedos and drop concrete blocks on their heads.

You must have a pathological hatred of men if you lump natural boisterous schoolboy exuberance of men on a stag night or some other get together with rapists and scum. For goodness sake.

Just because something has happened for a long time, doesn't make it acceptable.

Ok then. Next time you come across a bunch of drunk guys breaking out the booze and travelling as a group for a sports game or a stag and singing and shouting and whooping at women passing by why don't you go over to them and give them your lecture.
They will laugh you out of existence.

Today, if a husband beats his wife, he is legally culpable.

Too right he is. A man who beats his wife is the lowest of the low. Put him in prison and he will find out what the score is. Most prisoners saw their mothers and sisters beaten black and blue and wife beaters are only a peg above kiddie fiddlers.

It is no longer accepted as part of a guy's nature to want to slap his woman around a bit.

It NEVER was!

Before it was.

No it wasn't. Wife beating was never accepted.
The natural reaction of a group of guys who see a guy beating a woman is to lay him out cold.

And I guarantee there was some Azwaldos saying at the time "sure, what's a guy to do? We can't help getting a bit frustrated sometimes" when a woman raised an objection.

A bunch of drunken mates whooping at a passing woman is not the same as wife beating and rape.

Do you understand that?

People, attitudes and the law have evolved. So should you.

People's attitudes have not evolved. They haven't changed for thousands of years. Rape is wrong. Violence against women is wrong.

How could you possibly compare a group of men having a few drinks and being cheeky with females to men who rape and beat women?

Serious what is up with that?

Azwaldo55

eviltwin wrote: »

do you engage in this kind of behaviour yourself?

Sometimes I do yeah.
I went with my brothers and my future brother in law and his mates down the country and we all got absolutely sloshed and we were whooping and hollering at women and making a spectacle and a nuisance of ourselves.
We all wore fake tan and fishnets and had great fun.

Azwaldo55

Lux23 wrote: »

But this has changed, lots of men are capable of having a good night out without a fight or verbally sexually assaulting anyone.

Sexually assaulting someone???? WHAT???? The overwhelming majority of men go out to have a good time get boozed up and make some noise. If I saw a guy sexually assaulting a woman I would deck him.
Do you think all men are rapists or something?
What the hell?

Neyite

Abuse is abuse.

Whether its verbal or physical it still instills fear and intimidation in the victim.

LenaClaire

Azwaldo55 wrote: »

Sexually assaulting someone???? WHAT???? The overwhelming majority of men go out to have a good time get boozed up and make some noise. If I saw a guy sexually assaulting a woman I would deck him.
Do you think all men are rapists or something?
What the hell?

Telling a girl you are going to "tear her up" or that she "looks so good you want to fuck" her it is a type of sexual assault.

So yes, if you are making sexually unwanted comments YOU are the person sexually assaulting a woman. Not all men are rapists, but from your comments, you seem to think all men are pigs.

Neyite

Azwaldo55 wrote: »

Sometimes I do yeah.
I went with my brothers and my future brother in law and his mates down the country and we all got absolutely sloshed and we were whooping and hollering at women and making a spectacle and a nuisance of ourselves.
We all wore fake tan and fishnets and had great fun.

You were commiting public order offences. Breaking several laws. But who cares if you were verbally abusive to women trying to have a nice time, or to hospitality staff just trying to earn a wage, or impinging on the nights out of others. As long as you had your fun eh? :rolleyes:

MissFlitworth

I remember cycling to a friends house, aged 12, and having a group of guys aged 18-21 (student town) shout 'nice tits' at me. HAHAHhahaha, cheeky exhuberant pups!! Boys will be boys yeah? I'm sure it was my own fault that I was so freaked out I spent the next few years wearing huge baggy jumpers and not tshirts, few very sweaty summer for me! If I could go speak to 12 year old me I'd tell me to lighten the fudge up!

Or, waiting by myself at a bus stop, aged 16 and heading horseriding, and having a group of guys I knew from school shout sexually suggestive stuff at me about my riding crop and just riding in general. I know the same guys now and they'd all die of shame if I was to remind them of that day, because they've grown up, copped on and stopped acting like animals. Pity they couldn't have known about it back then because I stopped going horseriding shortly afterwards due to feeling panicky about waiting at that bus stop by myself.

There's nothing amusing about shouting at people in the street, or making suggestive comments to strangers or using your power as a group to make an individual feel small and disgusting and I'm eternally grateful that no men or women that I know or choose to be around would behave that way.

Azwaldo55

LenaClaire wrote: »

Telling a girl you are going to "tear her up" or that she "looks so good you want to fuck" her it is a type of sexual assault.

A sexual assault is when a guy lays a hand on a woman uninvited, gropes her or rapes her.

How is saying something lewd sexual assault?

I like to run and swim and play soccer. Plenty of times girls will shout something lewd at me.

Do I have PTSD?

Don't be ridiculous.

So yes, if you are making sexually unwanted comments YOU are the person sexually assaulting a woman. Not all men are rapists, but from your comments, you seem to think all men are pigs.

How is it sexual assault to say something off color?

It's rude and crude but how can it be an assault? A verbal assault surely. But a sexual assault?

Nuts.

B0jangles

Azwaldo55 wrote: »

Sometimes I do yeah.
I went with my brothers and my future brother in law and his mates down the country and we all got absolutely sloshed and we were whooping and hollering at women and making a spectacle and a nuisance of ourselves.
We all wore fake tan and fishnets and had great fun.

And there we have it.

"I do a shítty thing but I don't want to acknowledge that it a shítty way to behave so I'll keep on bellowing that it is normal and natural and everyone else does it and and and...."

You are bullying and harassing strangers for your own entertainment, that's kind of the definition of a complete and total asshole.

Azwaldo55

MissFlitworth wrote: »

I remember cycling to a friends house, aged 12, and having a group of guys aged 18-21 (student town) shout 'nice tits' at me. HAHAHhahaha, cheeky exhuberant pups!! Boys will be boys yeah? I'm sure it was my own fault that I was so freaked out I spent the next few years wearing huge baggy jumpers and not tshirts, few very sweaty summer for me! If I could go speak to 12 year old me I'd tell me to lighten the fudge up!

Or, waiting by myself at a bus stop, aged 16 and heading horseriding, and having a group of guys I knew from school shout sexually suggestive stuff at me about my riding crop and just riding in general. I know the same guys now and they'd all die of shame if I was to remind them of that day, because they've grown up, copped on and stopped acting like animals. Pity they couldn't have known about it back then because I stopped going horseriding shortly afterwards due to feeling panicky about waiting at that bus stop by myself.

There's nothing amusing about shouting at people in the street, or making suggestive comments to strangers or using your power as a group to make an individual feel small and disgusting and I'm eternally grateful that no men or women that I know or choose to be around would behave that way.

I bet the trauma of Anne Frank or child soldiers in Africa doesn't even measure up!

Are you for real?:D

There are kids with no clothes who would happily wear your baggy clothes or who would eat a horse rather than ride it.

Pathetic!

Just because someone said something nasty to you you had a psychological breakdown?

You need to toughen up. When I was a kid a lot worse happened to me. I'm not crying about it.

LenaClaire

Azwaldo55 wrote: »

A sexual assault is when a guy lays a hand on a woman uninvited, gropes her or rapes her.

How is saying something lewd sexual assault?

I like to run and swim and play soccer. Plenty of times girls will shout something lewd at me.

Do I have PTSD?

Don't be ridiculous.

Have you read the multiple comments of women here, who have been on thier own, when men (solo and in groups) have made derogatory, threatening, hateful comments at them? Have you heard how many times this has happened?

How slimy of person do you have to be, to think it is acceptable to behave in this manner? How do you think your mother would feel if she was waiting for a bus, and three young men surrounded her and told her she had nice tits, and she should smile for them?

Azwaldo55 wrote: »

How is it sexual assault to say something off color?

It's rude and crude but how can it be an assault? A verbal assault surely. But a sexual assault?

Nuts.

If you are making sexual comments that scare or threaten someone, then hell yes, I consider it sexual assault.

MissFlitworth

I know! Imagine me complaining about something bad that happened to me and changed my life for the worse, living with me till I was old enough to see people who shout at women and think it's hilarious for the dullards that they are, when worse things happened to other people. State of me.

LenaClaire

MissFlitworth wrote: »

I know! Imagine me complaining about something bad that happened to me and changed my life for the worse, living with me till I was old enough to see people who shout at women and think it's hilarious for the dullards that they are, when worse things happened to other people. State of me.

Don't worry your pretty head, he is a man. He knows that our experiences can never be valid or true. We should just go be pretty dolls that men can shout at and grunt over.

Azwaldo55

LenaClaire wrote: »

Have you read the multiple comments of women here, who have been on thier own, when men (solo and in groups) have made derogatory, threatening, hateful comments at them? Have you heard how many times this has happened?

Sticks and stones. Ever heard of that old phrase.
I've been verbally abused all my life and I give as good back.
How can words hurt? People need to toughen up.

How slimy of person do you have to be, to think it is acceptable to behave in this manner? How do you think your mother would feel if she was waiting for a bus, and three young men surrounded her and told her she had nice tits, and she should smile for them?

My mother is in her sixties. When she was young the miniskirt made its debut. She wore it just like other women. She was and is well able to stand up for herself.

Do you know the British gave us two words that work quite well in combination. One begins with F and the other begins with O.

If you are making sexual comments that scare or threaten someone, then hell yes, I consider it sexual assault.

So you want to put every stag crew on the sex offenders list? Do you want to arrest all the builders in the country? How about arresting an entire football stadium because they made a risque remark?
What a joke!

B0jangles

Azwaldo55 wrote: »

I've been verbally abused all my life

I wonder why...

Azwaldo55

B0jangles wrote: »

I wonder why...

Oh for godsake!

Ok then! What's the solution? A fascist police state that arrests men for sexual assault for saying "nice ass" or "nice tits" to women? Really? Do you want a police state or what?
As sure as night follows day, dogs will chase cats, bears will sh*t in the woods, the Pope is a Catholic and men will whoop and whistle and shout after women in the streets.

iwantmydinner

It's actually about time some right-thinking, sensible, red-blooded man landed in here to put us all in our places. I, for one, am actually relieved he's here to tell me what I can and cannot be upset or intimidated by and how I should feel when my personal space is aggressively invaded.

Now, back to thinking about the important things. Shoes, and how to bag myself a rich hubby, mainly.

LenaClaire

Azwaldo55 wrote: »

Sticks and stones. Ever heard of that old phrase.
I've been verbally abused all my life and I give as good back.
How can words hurt? People need to toughen up.

Good for you, i am glad you can give back. But imagine, you are now 5 ft nothing, and a smaller person. There are 2-4 larger people being loud and aggressive towards you. Currently it is verbal, but you have no idea when that will shift to them deciding that they want to touch or grab you. This can be scary, and unfortunately, is usually a common experience for most women.

Would you not have preferred that people DID NOT verbally abuse you? Do you not think that we can have better expectations of people? Or should we assume that people will always live down to their baser wants?

My mother is in her sixties. When she was young the miniskirt made its debut. She wore it just like other women. She was and is well able to stand up for herself.

But she should not have to deal with that crap in the first place, you should ask her if she liked it or not, rather than if she just dealt with it. We all deal with it, we would just rather not have to put idiots in their place all day.

So you want to put every stag crew on the sex offenders list? Do you want to arrest all the builders in the country? How about arresting an entire football stadium because they made a risque remark?
What a joke!

According to Citizens.ie that is verbal assault and it IS a crime:

- Threatening, abusive or insulting behaviour in a public place
Section 6 of the Criminal Justice (Public Order) Act 1994 makes it an offence for any person in a public place to use threatening, abusive or insulting words or behaviour with the intention of causing a breach of the peace. A typical example of this would be where a person, by their words or actions, was likely to cause a fight with the person or persons they were insulting. It would also cover the situation where groups of youths were looking for trouble by their threatening behaviour towards other people. Again, the Garda may confiscate alcohol.

So, yes, if every stag party is being insulting to women and causing trouble, they should all be talking to the Garda.

Maybe, if people stopped thinking that their right to act that maggot trumped everyone else's right to live in peace we would have a better society.

B0jangles

Azwaldo55 wrote: »

Oh for godsake!

Ok then! What's the solution? A fascist police state that arrests men for sexual assault for saying "nice ass" or "nice tits" to women? Really? Do you want a police state or what?
As sure as night follows day, dogs will chase cats, bears will sh*t in the woods, the Pope is a Catholic and men will whoop and whistle and shout after women in the streets.

Yes, that is exactly what I want.

(No I want you to get it through your head that your ideas about "what all guys do" are actually limited to a very loud and obnoxious minority of deeply insecure men who feel the need to assert their masculinity to their peers by harassing women in the street.)

Mark Tapley

Azwaldo55 wrote: »

Sticks and stones. Ever heard of that old phrase.
I've been verbally abused all my life and I give as good back.
How can words hurt? People need to toughen up.



My mother is in her sixties. When she was young the miniskirt made its debut. She wore it just like other women. She was and is well able to stand up for herself.

Do you know the British gave us two words that work quite well in combination. One begins with F and the other begins with O.



So you want to put every stag crew on the sex offenders list? Do you want to arrest all the builders in the country? How about arresting an entire football stadium because they made a risque remark?
What a joke!

How hard would it be for you to moderate your behaviour? Its not fun if one party is embarrassed or intimidated.
Using false analogies (Anne Frank) is just ridiculous.
Why should people have to " toughen up" to withstand a verbal assault from you.

eviltwin

Azwaldo55 wrote: »

Sometimes I do yeah.
I went with my brothers and my future brother in law and his mates down the country and we all got absolutely sloshed and we were whooping and hollering at women and making a spectacle and a nuisance of ourselves.
We all wore fake tan and fishnets and had great fun.

Why am I not surprised? So you do this because its part of your make-up as a male, I bet you're able to control it though.I doubt you'd do this in work, in a church or outside a school, so why can't you control yourself the rest of the time?

anewme

Azwaldo55 wrote: »

Sometimes I do yeah.
I went with my brothers and my future brother in law and his mates down the country and we all got absolutely sloshed and we were whooping and hollering at women and making a spectacle and a nuisance of ourselves.
We all wore fake tan and fishnets and had great fun.

Whoever said holler monkeys (that comment made me laugh so much)

Great fun????? I'd like to know the combined IQ on that trip!!!:pac::pac:

This has to be a wind up, no one could be that much of an empty vessel! I know everyone has their own idea of fun, but that's just off the scale.

The old saying "scarlah for ya" , springs to mind! Cringe!

Lucyfur

MOD

Aswaldo55, while you are entitled to your opinion, we would appreciate you taking some time out to read the forum charter before posting in tLL again. Harassment is NOT and never should be a case of ''boys will be boys''. Maybe take some time out to look at the way you behave in real life, also.

Can everyone else remember to use the report post function.

Thank you.

EDIT;

Aswaldo55 is taking a few days off. Posters do not need to be told to ''toughen up''. Jesus.

kiffer

Azwaldo... you and your brothers sound like fine upstanding gentlemen... by which I mean in fact the opposite.

Many of us manage to get through the day without shouting and hollering at people even whilst drunk.

I'm male, 6 foot tall and not exactly light, I still get the odd bit of trouble from groups of young men/boys (and increasingly women/girls)... it's very annoying for me*.
I can only imagine** that it's worse for women simply because they no doubt attract more attention, and appear more vulnerable.

It is objectification at it's purest.
"I can shout what I like, my mates will laugh, I don't care or even think of how it makes you feel".
It shows a shocking lack of empathy..
"I don't feel that way so you don't really feel that way, or you shouldn't."

Their maybe a core of actual friendlyness to things like "Cheer up luv, might never happen, give us a smile"...
It may even be honestly well meaning.
but there is no way "get your tits out", "can I've a go!?" type shouting is anything but for the entertainment of the shouters and their friends.
In closing... Bus ****... thoughtless pointless upsetting crap.



*it seems to come in waves and is generally harmless, even if it's annoying. I say harmless but I also accept that I only consider it mostly harmless because I'm tallish and male and so I just assume I'm 900 times more combat capable than I probably am. Still annoying though.
**imagine was a turn of phrase... technically I guess I don't need to imagine as we're being told about it...

Lucyfur

MOD

As aswaldo55 can't respond, kindly quit quoting him.

Moving on....