Anxiety and/or depression discussion.

NightOwl88

I think some doctors are far too keen to push certain meds,even wen your telling them these plain not working for me.. Confusing till u so all the notepads,mouse pads pens and other miscellaneous drug company muck.. Not sayin that's all docs,but some at very least...just my 2 cents on that folks...

Gremlinertia

You could say the same about antibiotics or aspirin type painkillers over the years. Most docs will try to refer you to some form of talk therapy or at least someone on the psych side of things for more specifically tailored help.. But sometimes all some people need is a few months assistance from medication to get over a hump.. My doc tried with me but it became apparent pretty rapidly that I needed a heather level of intervention and so he sent me to hospital..

I don't want to go into a 'big pharma' type thing because it'll derail the thread a bit I think.

drugstore cowboy

Gremlinertia wrote: »

I don't want to go into a 'big pharma' type thing because it'll derail the thread a bit I think.

I have issues with psychs and the drug companies as well. There are times they still try and push Zyprexa on me for short term anxiety I suffer instead of a benzo (which a GP will provide to me) which is off the charts madness when you consider how much trouble Eli Lilly were in trouble over regarding that drug and the payouts they have given to people who became physically ill due to it.

Maybe a separate thread for big pharma opinions could work?

Roquentin

drugstore cowboy wrote: »

I have issues with psychs and the drug companies as well. There are times they still try and push Zyprexa on me for short term anxiety I suffer instead of a benzo (which a GP will provide to me) which is off the charts madness when you consider how much trouble Eli Lilly were in trouble over regarding that drug and the payouts they have given to people who became physically ill due to it.

Maybe a separate thread for big pharma opinions could work?

i read alright that the durg companies have the colleges in their pockets with regards the publicity for drugs. There is big controversy with olanzapine alright

Joya

when my therapist referred me to drugs she could not stress more how important is for me to understand that they are just a part of recovery path, and that the other part which incledes my effort to for example meditate, eat properly, sleep properly, reduce stress wherever i can, attend therapy sessions, do go out when asked by good friends etc, and also communicate about my state with family (as i was hiding it from everyone) is very very important.
actually drugs would only help me to cope and not to resolve situations or issues.
...

Joya

Spanish Eyes wrote: »

Anyway, I wondered if anyone's anxiety is like mine. I don't get the panicky attacks where you feel you're going to die, but it is deeply unpleasant.

I hope the counselling will help. I think I have a lot of anger and sadness in me that's still to come out. I am looking forward to retirement, but this anxiety is clouding it for me.

Thanks for listening.

Hi Spanish Eyes,
i presume everyone's anxiety is similar and unique at the same time..
i have anxiety as well, specially social one for the last year, but also experienced for the first time in my lif real panic attacks due to stress last December..
Bereavement of loss of loved ones is difficult to bare, I lost my mom 4 years ago and I still miss her, I miss so much to talk to her, and also I am so sorry that she died suddenly while in hospital for some tests, she died in the middle of the night all alone.. and she gave so much to us, my family of 5, I felt that night that something is happening even I was in Ireland, and I could not sleep, I was crying, my bf at the time told me that it is all going to be okay, around 2pm he said okay, lets try like to feel that we are hugging her, and so we did, while in bed, asif she is there with us, and that is how I fell asleep.
needles to say while just got to work next morning, i got a phone call, from my dad.. my mother died that night.. she was 64..
so many things left i wish i said to her when i saw her last time.. if i only knew it would be the lst time i will see her.. i don't think it will ever ease, i just kind of am trying to learn to live with it..
i ve heard it could help to write a letter to that person as if she is alive and to bring it to the grave, perhaps read it and then burn it symbolically release it.. i didn't try that i feel like id die just writing it.
anyway not sure i am answering your question at all, ....but
thank you for sharing your story .........

avnol

Hey all I'm new to this tread so wanted to say hello to all. Brief history I've been suffering from anxiety depression on and off for a good 12 years. Have flair ups but currently ( since aug 2013 ) going through the worst flair up. Getting stronger day by day still have bad days. Am on meds-150mg Effexor and was in day hospital for 3 months there end of March to June. Working part time through it all, very difficult but lucky work are very supportive with my hours been cut back for me. I just wanted to say I know how awful this illness is. I know how crippling it feels. I also know how guilty you can feel when you see the hurt and pain in your loved ones eyes. I want to try activity post here cause I do have my awful days and would love some support. I also would love to give others support on their bad days. One thing though I've learnt is to not be ashamed of what we have. It is a recognised illness, it's a valid condition that causes awful pain. Don't ever be ashamed of who you are. A quote I read which is so true is the problem with us is that we care too much. We are not selfish people we are all wonderful. Through meeting others with similar conditions to me I was amazed how beautiful they where, absolutely lovely people. Look forward to chatting with you all

Roquentin

avnol wrote: »

Hey all I'm new to this tread so wanted to say hello to all. Brief history I've been suffering from anxiety depression on and off for a good 12 years. Have flair ups but currently ( since aug 2013 ) going through the worst flair up. Getting stronger day by day still have bad days. Am on meds-150mg Effexor and was in day hospital for 3 months there end of March to June. Working part time through it all, very difficult but lucky work are very supportive with my hours been cut back for me. I just wanted to say I know how awful this illness is. I know how crippling it feels. I also know how guilty you can feel when you see the hurt and pain in your loved ones eyes. I want to try activity post here cause I do have my awful days and would love some support. I also would love to give others support on their bad days. One thing though I've learnt is to not be ashamed of what we have. It is a recognised illness, it's a valid condition that causes awful pain. Don't ever be ashamed of who you are. A quote I read which is so true is the problem with us is that we care too much. We are not selfish people we are all wonderful. Through meeting others with similar conditions to me I was amazed how beautiful they where, absolutely lovely people. Look forward to chatting with you all

InReality

Off work and been in bed for a couple of days now. Thought it would be relaxing but feel ****e now. Feck it anyway.

Last few weeks have been up and down. Had been doing really well for a few months then last week I got rejected for the first time in a while. I think what made it harder than usual to take was that I actually thought I had a shot. :P Since then I've re-joined online dating and having the usual response, very little. Really hard when ya change things up but the **** stays the same.

avnol

Deleted User wrote: »

Last few weeks have been up and down. Had been doing really well for a few months then last week I got rejected for the first time in a while. I think what made it harder than usual to take was that I actually thought I had a shot. :P Since then I've re-joined online dating and having the usual response, very little. Really hard when ya change things up but the **** stays the same.

I know you hear this so much but really it's so true. I myself can vouch for that. You really really need to love you before you can love someone else. You need to feel comfortable in your own skin and accept who you are. I've been in the situation where I really wanted someone and really just to have someone settled for guys who really were not good enough for me. I eventually learned to accept being single and to look after me. My confidence started to increase then very randomly met a guy and well he's now my hubby. Things where different with him it just seemed to flow. I hear from my brother that the dating scene is difficult. I really believe there is someone out there that will find us and things will work out. You have to realise how wonderful you are. I really wish someone lovely and worthy of you will come your way.

Hugo Stiglitz

avnol wrote: »

You really really need to love you before you can love someone else. You need to feel comfortable in your own skin and accept who you are.

That's me ****ed so! :pac::o

avnol

InReality wrote: »

Off work and been in bed for a couple of days now. Thought it would be relaxing but feel ****e now. Feck it anyway.

I know that feeling all too well. I know when the bed seems like your safe place and all you wanna do is stay there but it's a vicious cycle. Take baby steps to getting out of the bed and maybe move to the couch in your pjs some day then maybe the next day get dressed but stay on the couch. Little by little build yourself up and trust yourself you can do it. I know exactly how it feels but I know the importance of having stability and a routine. Routine really is so import at for us. Plus I also know sleep at night gets affected of I sleep during the day. It's the worst ever being awake during the night. The night can be very lonely and dark and great for the thoughts to race. I wish you well I really do. Have faith in yourself.

avnol

Hugo Stiglitz wrote: »

That's me ****ed so! :pac::o

Your not ****** trust me

avnol

avnol wrote: »

I know you hear this so much but really it's so true. I myself can vouch for that. You really really need to love you before you can love someone else. You need to feel comfortable in your own skin and accept who you are. I've been in the situation where I really wanted someone and really just to have someone settled for guys who really were not good enough for me. I eventually learned to accept being single and to look after me. My confidence started to increase then very randomly met a guy and well he's now my hubby. Things where different with him it just seemed to flow. I hear from my brother that the dating scene is difficult. I really believe there is someone out there that will find us and things will work out. You have to realise how wonderful you are. I really wish someone lovely and worthy of you will come your way.

Amazing how much of that can be projected by a couple of carefully-selected pictures of myself. :P

avnol

Hugo Stiglitz wrote: »

That's me ****ed so! :pac::o

I know it's the hardest thing to do is accept yourself. What I was told to do in the day hospital was ask your closest family and friends what they see in you that's positive and what they admire. You'd be amazed at what they say. I know it's so easy for us to look in the mirror and pick out all those bad things about ourselves. I'm starting to realise though that all the negativity is in our heads not others. This is a huge thing for me considering the paranoia I had 6 months ago where I couldn't leave the house cause I thought everyone outside was judging me and laughing about me behind my back, that wasn't fun

Hugo Stiglitz

Thanks for the reply. I was just poking some fun at myself

avnol

Hugo Stiglitz wrote: »

Thanks for the reply. I was just poking some fun at myself

Hugo Stiglitz

You did make a lot of sense there Avnol I must admit. Thanks for sharing.

Keep the chin up Buttons. Good things will come.

InReality

Thanks avn, I was surprised at how bad I am after just a couple of days out of the routine of getting up. Not as bad now although still a way off my normal mood.

Roquentin

I remember reading on another forum about a guy who used beat himself up after nights out because all his friends were getting girls and the girls were rejecting him. Some people are just so caught up in this rat race of being popular, that when their expectations are not met, they implode. Ireland with the boom has become more materialistic, wherein you have to be privileged and look smart in the eyes of others.

You can get involved in this petty competition or you can accept yourself for who you are. You cant be what you are not. In the professional environment some peoples expectations are so great, that the minute they fail, they collapse. They are putting too much pressure on themselves to succeed.

I have seen quite a number of posters who say their jobs is stressful. If thats the case, maybe you need a new job or new career. Now if you havent a mortgage or loans or family, you have the luxury of choice.

One of the big problems i see (not with everyone) is that they have this dream of what their life should be and when that dream is not realized, they get depressed. Again they are looking at the destination rather than the journey. You dont need to do what everyone else is doing. You need to be yourself and find your own voice.

So I should never leave the house? Got it. :pac:

avnol

Roquentin wrote: »

I remember reading on another forum about a guy who used beat himself up after nights out because all his friends were getting girls and the girls were rejecting him. Some people are just so caught up in this rat race of being popular, that when their expectations are not met, they implode. Ireland with the boom has become more materialistic, wherein you have to be privileged and look smart in the eyes of others.

You can get involved in this petty competition or you can accept yourself for who you are. You cant be what you are not. In the professional environment some peoples expectations are so great, that the minute they fail, they collapse. They are putting too much pressure on themselves to succeed.

I have seen quite a number of posters who say their jobs is stressful. If thats the case, maybe you need a new job or new career. Now if you havent a mortgage or loans or family, you have the luxury of choice.

One of the big problems i see (not with everyone) is that they have this dream of what their life should be and when that dream is not realized, they get depressed. Again they are looking at the destination rather than the journey. You dont need to do what everyone else is doing. You need to be yourself and find your own voice.

I agree we tend to put so much pressure on ourselves to conform with what society wants and what they consider right. You only have to look at those stupid trashy mags (yes I do read them at times) to see the air brushed pics and how we should be all skinny and beautiful. It really annoys me that there is such a emphasis on what society wants. We shouldn't be told how to look. Also we shouldn't be told what's beautiful or not. I also agree that when it comes to dating/settling down everyone is different. There shouldn't be any pressure put on people to do it now. Everyone should do what's best in their own time. Looks are only skin deep of course you need to be physically attracted to someone but my god what they have on the inside and how amazing they make you feel that's what's important. I know in my teens I always went for the pretty boys. I think it was to try tell myself that I'm pretty but it didn't do me any good. They messed me around and I didn't feel any better about me.

avnol

Deleted User wrote: »

So I should never leave the house? Got it. :pac:

I get ya. It is amazing how quickly you can be knocked off course. Babysteps are the way forward though. I do always have the flicker of a thought every morning going stay in bed you ll be safer here. I just tend to force my feet out of the bed and literally look at both feet moving one in front of the other. I just then think ok take it step by step it's just a case of putting one foot in front of the other. I also do that in a crowd or when I'm feeling overwhelmed, I tend to look at my feet when I walk lol

avnol

avnol wrote: »

I get ya. It is amazing how quickly you can be knocked off course. Babysteps are the way forward though. I do always have the flicker of a thought every morning going stay in bed you ll be safer here. I just tend to force my feet out of the bed and literally look at both feet moving one in front of the other. I just then think ok take it step by step it's just a case of putting one foot in front of the other. I also do that in a crowd or when I'm feeling overwhelmed, I tend to look at my feet when I walk lol

Nah I was just being glib.
For me it's not about what society thinks or any of that rubbish. I may as well be celibate at this stage but it ain't by choice. I got my head sorted and still had the same result. I've been losing weight lately, taking better care of myself, all that stuff. Same result as before. Really failing to see the point in trying at this stage, it's always been the same.

avnol

Deleted User wrote: »

Nah I was just being glib.
For me it's not about what society thinks or any of that rubbish. I may as well be celibate at this stage but it ain't by choice. I got my head sorted and still had the same result. I've been losing weight lately, taking better care of myself, all that stuff. Same result as before. Really failing to see the point in trying at this stage, it's always been the same.

I was a size 8 with depression and felt sh** about myself. I'm now a size 14 with depression and still feel crap about myself. Starting to accept myself a bit. I've learned though that no matter what size you are the problem is still with how we see ourselves. I was told it's cause we are so used to thinking negatively about everything that we actually can't really think positive or believe positive things. It's like our brain has to be reprogrammed to think more positivity or something like that

avnol

avnol wrote: »

I was a size 8 with depression and felt sh** about myself. I'm now a size 14 with depression and still feel crap about myself. Starting to accept myself a bit. I've learned though that no matter what size you are the problem is still with how we see ourselves. I was told it's cause we are so used to thinking negatively about everything that we actually can't really think positive or believe positive things. It's like our brain has to be reprogrammed to think more positivity or something like that

If things changed and I still thought the same then I would accept that.
I took a break for a while from thinking about all that stuff and sorted my head out and was happy. Until the same pattern as a couple of years ago emerged once again. I try to judge things on outcomes and while I can change lots of other stuff if the outcome stays the same (and bad) then it's kinda hard to not get a bit hacked off about it.

Roquentin

avnol wrote: »

I was a size 8 with depression and felt sh** about myself. I'm now a size 14 with depression and still feel crap about myself. Starting to accept myself a bit. I've learned though that no matter what size you are the problem is still with how we see ourselves. I was told it's cause we are so used to thinking negatively about everything that we actually can't really think positive or believe positive things. It's like our brain has to be reprogrammed to think more positivity or something like that

People i think believe that once they achieve they will be happy. So a man may say that once he has the degree and the family, it will all come together. It may and it may not, nothing is certain. Like you say, you have to be happy within yourself. If you dont accept yourself, then no matter what you do, it will not be good enough.

Freud said love and work, but you have to be comfortable in both environments. You must understand your own limitations and ask yourself can i do this or that. If you are in a job, where you are struggling with anxiety for a while, well then you may have to accept that this isnt the job for you. The same with relationships.

You must find your equilibrium/comfortable zone in life and that comes from accepting who you are. What you can do and cannot do. We are all human and all have strong points and weak points. And if it means perhaps settling for a life of lower value in the eyes of others, then so be it. It is your life, not theirs.

avnol

Deleted User wrote: »

If things changed and I still thought the same then I would accept that.
I took a break for a while from thinking about all that stuff and sorted my head out and was happy. Until the same pattern as a couple of years ago emerged once again. I try to judge things on outcomes and while I can change lots of other stuff if the outcome stays the same (and bad) then it's kinda hard to not get a bit hacked off about it.

Ye I agree it's true if you feel your trying your hardest and not getting anything back in return. The only thing I can say which is do frickin hard I know is to have patience. Good things will come your way. Yes a lot of crap can and does go on. I know that too well but as hard as it is too we have to let those horrible things go and also not let past hurt stop you from taking chances and living your life. The thing with love well it does find you when you least expect it.

Hugo Stiglitz

I complain about my lot so much but I'm not actively doing anything to change. Feel like a bit of a hypocrite. I'm lazy and while sad it is easier to stay the same and suffer than it is to face up my issues and change.