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Ideal woman
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My ideal woman would be as follows
- Attractive
- Intelligent
- Has a decent job (not the type where you work 80hrs a week job but something that can support both of us financially if I lose my job or something happens)
- Has similar interests with me
- Adventurous
- Honesty
- Low maintenance (can't see why some need to have 18 different dresses to choose to wear for one night only and not to wear it again
)
- Has a great appetite and an excellent cooker
- A great sense of humour
- Most importantly, a dog-lover
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Moderators, Science, Health & Environment Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 60,104 Mod ✭✭✭✭
Join Date:Posts: 59033
Oh I'd say a few of us have been there B. I have. It's all too easy to mistake drama for emotions and/or passion, especially when young and especially if the woman is good looking. That crap gets real old real quick though. I don't care how gorgeous you think she is, it will get old and you will get tired of looking at her, among other verbs...
If you're sensible/lucky. Too many guys can get stuck in that rut, especially if it's early on in their romantic journey. They think that's reality. They assume that's how Women(tm) are. Culture and the media doesn't help here. "Bitches be crazy" is a well worn meme, as is "you can never understand women" and all that guff. Hell some never learn. I can think of more than a couple of guys in their 30's and 40's who never learned and now they're married to "girls".
If you keep your eyes and ears and brain open and learn to ignore the one eyed tiny brain in your pants then you come to realise that that type of soul drainer isn't a woman, they're a little girl masquerading as one. Learn the difference and it gets so much easier. There are more women than girls out there. The latter just tend to make the more noise so are the more noticeable. Talk to women, ignore girls(of any age). Never worth it beyond a flingette and even then...
Signs you have a Girlchild(tm)?
It's always about them, how they feel, how they filter life through their internal lens. It's entirely subjective, even when they appear to do something nice. It's all about how it makes them feel. They mistake sentiment and drama for emotion and reality. They have a drama requirement a need for emotional stimulation that needs a constant topup and if they don't get the good healthy kind of topup, they engineer a situation to get that emotional stimulation, even if it's unhealthy. Loyalty is a fluid concept. This goes for mates as well as lovers. If their social circle is updated weekly and confusing as hell, run. If they were checking you out while still with the previous doofus then you're looking into a crystal ball. They abhor personal responsibility. They will always look for another to lay the blame at. As the boyfriend that will fall to you. They're way too quick to accelerate the emotional attachment. If they're saying I love you unbidden within the first month, check out cargo flights to Zambezi as an escape route.
There are other pointers, but if you have ticked a few boxes from above then caveat emptor folks.
Many moons ago in the Ladies Lounge I outlined a few bullet points on gobshíte blokes and signs on how to avoid same, so figured I'd return the favour. Rejoice in the awareness of feeling stupid, for that’s how you end up learning new things. If you’re not aware you’re stupid, you probably are.
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Where's that post on gobshite blokes, Wibbs?
Feel somewhat obliged to check it out and ensure I don't ever tick any of those boxes
PS: Great post above. Fully agree.
Two of my early ventures into the waters of relationships were, in hindsight, with such "girls". Even though they weren't the Marilyn Monroe quoting type, their love for drama and other such things you mentioned became far too much, and rather quickly.
Put me off relationships for a long while, actually.0 -
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Moderators, Science, Health & Environment Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 60,104 Mod ✭✭✭✭ Join Date:Posts: 59033
Where's that post on gobshite blokes, Wibbs?
Feel somewhat obliged to check it out and ensure I don't ever tick any of those boxes god knows how deep in the matrix it is. Must be five years ago. The general gist was avoid emotionally underdeveloped men. Both distant types and overly attached types. The distant type tends to be more appealing though and easier to get sucked into.
Avoid relationships with that type and you'll be grand.Two of my early ventures into the waters of relationships were, in hindsight, with such "girls". Even though they weren't the Marilyn Monroe quoting type, their love for drama and other such things you mentioned became far too much, and rather quickly.
Put me off relationships for a long while, actually.
One thing I find interesting about the whole PUA subculture is they actually describe these self centered types to a tee. They actively preselect them. And IMHO yep the PUA tactics do work on the type, so they are pretty much spot on if you want that type of person.Rejoice in the awareness of feeling stupid, for that’s how you end up learning new things. If you’re not aware you’re stupid, you probably are.
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*tips hatMaximus Alexander wrote: »What can I say? I'm a sexpert.
That's short for search expert.
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gold_bricker wrote: »im not at a level where i would be entitled to the ideal woman , i have a girlfriend who i love and who loves me so im a happy camper , their are things about her im not a fan of but life isnt a fairytale and most people eventually have to settle in some shape or form
Perhaps I'm being harsh, but this post makes me a little sad
Why are you not entitled to your ideal woman, and why do people have to "settle"?
Obviously you need realism, so perhaps I'm taking it too literally, but I could never see myself staying in a relationship just because I feel its the done thing, or that I'm obliged to.0 -
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Perhaps I'm being harsh, but this post makes me a little sad
Why are you not entitled to your ideal woman, and why do people have to "settle"?
Obviously you need realism, so perhaps I'm taking it too literally, but I could never see myself staying in a relationship just because I feel its the done thing, or that I'm obliged to.
Well, to be honest most people if not all are settling, if you compare reality to idealism. If you lived in a town or band of 100 people like people have for tens of thousands of years then you would have a limited scope and yet people still bred.
As they are breeding now though apparently we got way more choice.
For all our wide choice of partner, Infinite choice is no choice.
My ideal woman would be, if I am being flippant, is one who doesn't annoy me. And before someone says I'm being mysogynistjc, people in general annoy me.
Good looking, physically fit/athletic, intelligent and kind.0 -
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