are you a Tough Guy?

Cody Pomeray

This morning I put my hand into the laundry basket, Saturday laundry time, and fished out a fistful of broken glass. I didn't know there was glass in there,so I had grabbed it real hard.

Crystals of a shattered wine glass were crushed into to my palm, great shards hung there with gathering globs of blood.

My hand is cut pretty bad but I don't need a doctor*. I just picked most of the the glass out of my hand, bandaged it up with a rag, and did the laundry.

Tough Guy here.

How about you? Tell AH why you're a Tough Guy


*terrified of needles

mfceiling

I'm just sitting here with a glass of poitin while stoking the red hot embers of the fire with my cock...

RoyalMarine

I wash my self with a rag on a stick

caustic 1

I'm just sitting here with a glass of poitin while stoking the red hot embers of the fire with my cock...

That image just made my day .. laughing at thought.

.Henry Sellers.

I'm so tough I pretend no one is here when there's a knock at the door.

Antisocialiser

I'm tough cause i don't play by anyone's rules, not even my own.

The One Who Knocks

Not really, but sometimes I like to dress up with a pork pie hat and knock on peoples doors and stuff.

WoollyRedHat

I once killed a bear with my bare hands. The bear begged for mercy, but I showed none.

The Pheasant2

.Henry Sellers. wrote: »

I'm so tough I pretend no one is here when there's a knock at the door.

And don't forget: YOU MADE THE BBC!

The One Who Knocks

.Henry Sellers. wrote: »

I'm so tough I pretend no one is here when there's a knock at the door.

Oh, that explains it then... I thought I could hear someone shuffling around but presumed it was just my imagination.

uch

I put witch Hazel on my Hemorrhoids

endacl

Yeah. I lift, bro.

Sunnyisland

I am so tough I have a grisly bear carpet in my room, the bear Isent dead it's to afraid to move....












Shamelessly stolen from chuck Norris jokes.

The One Who Knocks

uch wrote: »

I put witch Hazel on my Hemorrhoids

I don’t believe you, continue.

timthumbni

I once went on holiday to the Virgin Islands. They are now simply referred to as the Islands.

beardedmaster

After cutting your hand fairly badly, as you say yourself, not going to a Doctor because you're afraid of needles is a bit... confusing to me.
It's a cut hand... you'll get some stitches or steri-strips put on, with some antiseptic dabbed on. No needles!

Frosty McSnowballs

I'm as tough as cotton wool

timthumbni

I went to the same school as Chuck Norris and Bruce lee. After slapping them around I used to steal their dinner money every day.

stoneill

Cody Pomeray wrote: »

This morning I put my hand into the laundry basket, Saturday laundry time,

Saturday laundry time
Saturday laundry time
Saturday laundry time
Saturday laundry time
Saturday laundry time
Saturday laundry time

Tough guy is it?

jimmii

I'm not terrified of needles. Tough guy.

timthumbni

I was once up in court on an attempted murder charge. The judge walked in and on seeing me immediately dismissed the case and I walked free.

His words to the assembled press was that everyone knows that timthumbni would never "attempt" murder.

I'm so tough like. :-)

timthumbni

Can we not just change the thread title to best Chuck Norris jokes. It would make it easier for the lot of us and otherwise it may indeed offend Chuck Norris.

Rayne Wooney

Cody Pomeray wrote: »

This morning I put my hand into the laundry basket, Saturday laundry time, and fished out a fistful of broken glass. I didn't know there was glass in there,so I had grabbed it real hard.

Crystals of a shattered wine glass were crushed into to my palm, great shards hung there with gathering globs of blood.

My hand is cut pretty bad but I don't need a doctor*. I just picked most of the the glass out of my hand, bandaged it up with a rag, and did the laundry.

Tough Guy here.

How about you? Tell AH why you're a Tough Guy


*terrified of needles

If you were a tough guy you'd fill your sink with salt and some water and put your hand in until the wounds heal

Sir Osis of Liver.

Im so fcukin tough my wife irons my shirt while im wearing it.
Tough.

Maximus Alexander

I'm so tough that I will do a shot of tequila without licking salt off my hand first, and drink milk on the use-by date.

Kilgore__Trout

I'm so tough I can crack a walnut between my ass cheeks.

timthumbni

I'm so tough that I eat after eights at half past seven.

Cody Pomeray

beardedmaster wrote: »

After cutting your hand fairly badly, as you say yourself, not going to a Doctor because you're afraid of needles is a bit... confusing to me.
It's a cut hand... you'll get some stitches or steri-strips put on, with some antiseptic dabbed on. No needles!

Last time I damaged my hand pretty bad (around the nail), not only did the doctor put a needle in my hand, it was a HOT needle and it went *into my nail*!

Seriously. Tough Guy. For a trypanophobe.

Also stitches usually go in with needles.

Banjo String

mfceiling wrote: »

I'm just sitting here with a glass of poitin while stoking the red hot embers of the fire with my cock...

Mmmmm.. :mad:

MRnotlob606

im so tough linda martin is scared of me. and hes tough.

Starscream25

I once put my fingers up a chickens ass to loosen a stuck egg.

Burky126

Sometimes I just like to crack my knuckles.


For the craic like.

razorblunt

I tell women their arses are fat in skirts, when they are of course.

Sunnyisland

timthumbni wrote: »

I once went on holiday to the Virgin Islands. They are now simply referred to as the Islands.

:):D:D

Doom

I broke my two legs...I cycled to the hospital

sonny jim bob jones

I eat pieces of **** like you for breakfast.

Skill Magill

Howard Juneau

I use a cheese grater when having a ****

sonny jim bob jones

Doom wrote: »

I broke my two legs...I cycled to the hospital

I broke both arms and both legs. I swam over to France for a work meeting before swimming home and doing a triathlon. I'll go to hospital in March if needed.

Banjo String

I did the back stroke up The Niagara falls.

ytpe2r5bxkn0c1

I'm so tough that I haven't seen a doctor over these persisting symptoms.
I'm so tough, I typed this with just one finger.
I'm so tough that I've cut back to one night-light.
I'm so tough that I don't cry when I stub my toe.
I'm so tough I played Russian roulette with a loaded Glock and won.
I'm so tough that I can drink water neat.


there's a million of them out there!

DEFTLEFTHAND

Cody Pomeray wrote: »

Last time I damaged my hand pretty bad (around the nail), not only did the doctor put a needle in my hand, it was a HOT needle and it went *into my nail*!

Seriously. Tough Guy. For a trypanophobe.

Also stitches usually go in with needles.

Ah yes the hot needle through the nail, I get dizzy even thinking about it. It's called lancing and is done to relieve the pressure the bleeding under the nail causes. Incredibly painful as I'm sure you know.

EazyD

Dry shaving the chin, back and sack

canadianwoman

Banjo String wrote: »

I did the back stroke up The Niagara falls.

You're not so tough. If you were then you'd know it's called Niagara Falls....not the Niagara Falls.:P

Karl Stein

I'm not afraid of butterflies any more.

Once I got the key of a Spanish petrol station customer loo, and when I unlocked the door there was a rat sitting on the rim of the hole-in-the-floor-type toilet.

I'm so hard that I didn't scream.


I did pee a bit though.:(

Agricola

When Martin O Neill heard I was in line to be his No.2, he shít himself and went with Roy Keane instead.

Too Tough To Die

Maybe, maybe not. Not the type to go on about it.

kirb42

mfceiling wrote: »

I'm just sitting here with a glass of poitin while stoking the red hot embers of the fire with my cock...

Behind You All the Way....

Mint Aero

I smell minty

deadybai

I'm so tough, I spray lynx on my cock