Problem with drink or over reaction from others?

Gringo180

Sounds like your in denial mate, why do you have to drink 8 cans a nite could you not just drink 1 or 2 and leave it at that?

willmunny1990

December2012 wrote: »

Did your own parents drink that much?

How is your self esteem?

I wonder why you can't see the problem you are creating for your son - you're stopping him from having a home with you.

My self esteem is fine and I never lived full time with the child and girlfriend as we have a fairly rocky past.

Gringo180 wrote: »

Sounds like your in denial mate, why do you have to drink 8 cans a nite could you not just drink 1 or 2 and leave it at that?

I just don't see the point in drinking one or two, id rather not drink at all. If I'm out for a match or event and I know I'll only be there for one or two I wont bother drinking.

Dave McDavis

willmunny1990 wrote: »

My self esteem is fine and I never lived full time with the child and girlfriend as we have a fairly rocky past.



I just don't see the point in drinking one or two, id rather not drink at all. If I'm out for a match or event and I know I'll only be there for one or two I wont bother drinking.

Will, as you get older you will find your drinking will naturally thin out and you won't be drinking as much. Jarring in your early 20s is just blowing off steam and having the craic

Gringo180

willmunny1990 wrote: »

My self esteem is fine and I never lived full time with the child and girlfriend as we have a fairly rocky past.



I just don't see the point in drinking one or two, id rather not drink at all. If I'm out for a match or event and I know I'll only be there for one or two I wont bother drinking.

8 cans is alot to drink, I wouldnt be able to function properly the next day after that many. I cant believe your not drunk after 8 cans either unless you have grown a high tolerance for alcohol which in itself should ring alarm bells.

Gringo180

Dave McDavis wrote: »

Will, as you get older you will find your drinking will naturally thin out and you won't be drinking as much. Jarring in your early 20s is just blowing off steam and having the craic

Having the craic? Downing 8 cans every second night alone wouldnt be my idea of having the craic :O

willmunny1990

Gringo180 wrote: »

8 cans is alot to drink, I wouldnt be able to function properly the next day after that many. I cant believe your not drunk after 8 cans either unless you have grown a high tolerance for alcohol which in itself should ring alarm bells.

Id have the 8 spaced out over a few hours, I wouldn't be downing them like there is no tomorrow.

Stavro Mueller

So what do you think about the HSE guidelines regarding alcohol consumption? If you put your details into the calculator on www.drinkaware.ie you'll see that your consumption of alcohol is gone well beyond its recommendations. You're at the 50 mark at least...

I've edited the details for men into this table - Hope it makes sense

Risk|Men|Common Effects
Low Risk|17 standard drinks or fewer per week with two alcohol-free days|Increased relaxation. Sociability
Increased Risk|18 to 40 standard drinks per week|Less energy. Depression/stress. Insomnia. Impotence. Risk of injury. High blood pressure
High Risk|41 or more standard drinks per week|All of the above and… Memory loss, Risk of liver disease, Risk of cancer, Risk of alcohol dependence

Gringo180

willmunny1990 wrote: »

Id have the 8 spaced out over a few hours, I wouldn't be downing them like there is no tomorrow.

All the best mate amyways hope you eventually see that you are drinking to excess and knock it on the head before it gets much worse because believe me it can as I have seen people close to me go downhill rapid on the drink. Remember its a great servant but a bad master!

Meangadh

willmunny1990 wrote: »

A lot seem to think I put drink ahead of my son, this is not the case. I never miss events, miss seeing him, let him see my drunk or drinking. I don't think it's fair to say I put drink first. Its the girlfriends choice not to stay over with him anymore which I think is a bit much, I don't get abusive, fall around, make loads of noise or anything like that.

If I was told in the morning that if I didn't cut down or give up drink that id never see my child again id obviously stop, no question. I just don't it's fair for me to be put in that position.

Ok OP, just put the fact that you have a child aside for a second and just consider you and the amount you drink. Nothing else. Not family commitments, not work, nothing else. Just you and the amount of alcohol you are consuming weekly. It's way too much. You may think it's not, but to deny that is to deny scientific fact. Maybe saying you are an alcoholic is premature, but keep going the way you are and I guarantee you will end up one. Never mind the amount of money you are literally peeing away every week that could be spent on something far more worthwhile. I say all this as someone who enjoys a drink, and of course sometimes over indulges every now and again-but you are over indulging 4 times a week at least. That's a problem, plain and simple.

And as for adding a child into that equation- there is absolutely no way in hell I would be allowing my child to be around someone like you regularly OP. That might sound harsh, but I just wouldn't want my child to be in the company of someone who thinks that amount of alcohol is acceptable. If you want to have a normal healthy relationship with your child as they grow up, then you need to re-evaluate your relationship with your drinking.

gordongekko

Gringo180 wrote: »

Having the craic? Downing 8 cans every second night alone wouldnt be my idea of having the craic :O

so?? Do you own the rights on craic? If he wants to have a few drinks he is doing nothing wrong. He is well aware that the volume is large and has taken steps to reduce the volume. There is a major overreaction by the mother teresas on this forum.

foxinsox

Hi op,

Just felt the need to reply.

Fair play to you for posting in the first place. I hope you will think about the answers you have got here.

I personally think you are drinking to much and that it is a path that can only lead to trouble.

But it's up to you, only you can change these habits.

Please do..

Best of luck :-)

Stavro Mueller

You know, it really doesn't matter what any of us think about your drinking. We're anonymous strangers on the internet. In your real life your mum and your girlfriend have a real problem with it and that's all that matters. If you want to ignore all the advice that has been given to you here and continue down the road you're going, then that's your choice.

ivytwine

cymbaline wrote: »

You know, it really doesn't matter what any of us think about your drinking. We're anonymous strangers on the internet. In your real life your mum and your girlfriend have a real problem with it and that's all that matters. If you want to ignore all the advice that has been given to you here and continue down the road you're going, then that's your choice.

^^^^ this.

Nobody can take control of this situation but you OP. But the way you're going, it'll be a lonely life.

I also would like to make the point that the people concerned about the OP's drinking around his little boy are being labelled "mother Teresa" really reinforces how much of a problem we have with drink in this country. FFS, drink yourself stupid in college, I did it, many did it, but if you have a kid it's time to stop.

SpaceTime

OP: You wouldn't be posting this if you didn't know that it was a problem.


Your relationship aside, that amount of drink will do you serious physical damage. You can look forward to your liver failing and various other rather nasty consequences. Even just from a looks point of view it will have a major impact.

You should go seek help from your GP or if you're not keen on speaking to them, your university medical service or just find a random GP that you can just discuss this with.

You clearly realise it's a problem yet you are arguing that it isn't both with your GF and with this random bunch of online strangers...

Seek help sooner rather than when it's done physical damage or wrecked your relationship / undermined your academic or work prospects.

With that amount of drinking, I would be very surprised if you could do well at university or hold down a job. It's *WAY* too much.

December2012

Look OP we are strangers to you, you don't know if anybody here has experience or is trained to deal with alcohol dependency or drinking to excess and we are not professionals.

The best thing you should do is go to a medical professional who deals with alcohol and ask them the question you originally posted here - they will tell you if it's too much.

If you think that your girlfriend is using your child as a bargaining chip you should go and talk that out with a family therapist.

Taltos

OK OP

after now reaching page 6 of this thread I am closing it.
You came here asking for advice and confirmation that folk were over-reacting but this thread has served it's purpose I believe as you continue to be in denial that your family are rightly concerned for you.

Please have a look at our charter - there are some resources at the end that would be helpful. None of us can help you accept you have a problem only you can make the decision to seek the help you need. If you won't do this for yourself do it for your family. As someone who has a parent who had an issue with alcohol I cannot stress enough how destructive this is to the child even if you think you are in control and managing it.

All the best, hoping you can come to accept you need help and will seek it.
Taltos