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Choose between Career and Mortgage

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    #92
    iguana
    Moderators, Entertainment Moderators Posts: 12,909 Mod ✭✭✭✭iguana


    Millicent wrote: »
    There's no need to go twisting her words. It was very clear what she meant and it's reaching to imply that she was trying to insult SAHMs.

    I thought it was very clear and did in fact find it extremely insulting.


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    #93
    Millicent
    Registered Users Posts: 4,559 ✭✭✭Millicent


    iguana wrote: »
    I thought it was very clear and did in fact find it extremely insulting.

    Really? Even though the poster was talking about potentially losing their career skills and ending up on the dole out of lack of choice/availability of childcare? I don't see that as a pop at all SAHMs, to be honest, just one mother pointing out that the system does not encourage working mothers as it is now.


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    #94
    Ice Storm
    Registered Users Posts: 938 ✭✭✭Ice Storm


    Millicent wrote: »
    Really? Even though the poster was talking about potentially losing their career skills and ending up on the dole out of lack of choice/availability of childcare? I don't see that as a pop at all SAHMs, to be honest, just one mother pointing out that the system does not encourage working mothers as it is now.
    I don't think anyone is taking issue with that part of the post.

    It was the phrase "non productive member of society" that seemed to be used as a description of stay at home mothers that is causing offence. And in no way were these words twisted.

    Edit: Maybe it's not what she intended but it's certainly how it came across to me.


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    #95
    meeeeh
    Registered Users Posts: 11,624 ✭✭✭✭meeeeh


    I think that non-productive member of society was meant in the context of paye and prsi contributions. And there is no doubt that it's better for taxes and the state if less mothers are staying at home. It might not make much difference financially to them but with their money another person could be employed minding the kids. It's overly simplified argument because it excludes inflation etc but in general is higher employment better.


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    #96
    iguana
    Moderators, Entertainment Moderators Posts: 12,909 Mod ✭✭✭✭iguana


    And how was I don't want my child to see his mum not working, not providing.... meant to be taken? Her implication was clear.


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    #97
    pwurple
    Closed Accounts Posts: 12,449 ✭✭✭✭pwurple


    The solution has got be be tax credits I think. If it's subsidised childcare by the govt, then it is forcing SAH parents into the workforce, which they may not want.

    If I pay full time 9-5 childcare here it would cost me 14500 net euro per annum. After tax. Then the creche pays the childcare workers out of that, and they pay tax on that again. (Plus their other expenses, insurance, property etc). If there was even a partial tax credit it would make a massive difference to making work more feasible for those on lower and middle income.

    And let's face it, most of us have children in our late 20's or 30's. we are not likely to be at the top of our careers at that point. So many women who have ability and ambition to get to the top, earn big wages, employ people of their own and pay huge taxes, are just cut off at the pass by prohibitive childcare costs.


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    #98
    ash23
    Closed Accounts Posts: 4,791 ✭✭✭ash23


    iguana wrote: »
    And how was I don't want my child to see his mum not working, not providing.... meant to be taken? Her implication was clear.

    How is that any different to the usual "I don't want to leave my child in a creche all day"? We all do what is right for our own families and our own beliefs and principles.

    I am my childs only parent so yes, I want her to see me working and providing rather than at home on welfare living off the state. I would feel like a bad example were I to be sat home all day not working and not providing for my little family. It's not what I want for myself or my child. It's not to say any parent who is at home or on welfare is "bad". I make my own choices.

    I would also be pretty adamant that I want to be a good example for my child and show her that she can work and be independent.
    If she chooses to be a sahm that is her choice. But I would want it to be of her choosing and not enforced because of finances.
    Surely we all just want to be the best we can for our kids and we shouldn't have to make apologies if our choices or priorities are different, nor should we have to justify them.


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    #99
    iguana
    Moderators, Entertainment Moderators Posts: 12,909 Mod ✭✭✭✭iguana


    ash23 wrote: »
    How is that any different to the usual "I don't want to leave my child in a creche all day"? We all do what is right for our own families and our own beliefs and principles.

    I don't think it is different and I'd expect someone who posted that to be pulled up for insulting mothers/parents who choose to place their children in the care of a crèche. We can all do what is right for our own families but if we justify those choices in a way that holds other people's choices in a negative light then it's to be expected that we'll insult people.


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