What makes someone a failure at life?

Gee_G

Buttonftw wrote: »

How so exactly? What kind of things should they desire to do?

I think all people should have the desire to achieve. Whether it be through education, work, family, health. You have to have an aim,something to work towards

Killer Wench

Killer Wench wrote: »

They should desire something.

Any examples? I'm gessing they'll generally be similar to things you desire.

Killer Wench

Deleted User wrote: »

Any examples? I'm gessing they'll generally be similar to things you desire.

Anything.

Alactric

Killer Wench wrote: »

I have family members who suffer from clinical depression but most of them realize that something is wrong and they seek medical treatment. That to me is a desire to do something to improve their life. Not the same thing.

Not trying to put words in your mouth or anything...but your not really considering varying degrees of depression at all there man. I can tell you personally, if the people in your family realize there's something wrong they are in much, much better shape than some of the people I've seen.

Meangadh

People who make life more difficult for other people even though it could be avoidable. People like rapists, paedophiles, dole scroungers who make no effort to look for work, robbers, violent people, even people who just moan and bitch for no real reason... there are loads more I'm sure.

Basically if you screw up your own life that's your own choice, but make someone else's life a misery then I say you fail at life.

Having said that, I suppose some people end up in the above list cos somebody else in their lives failed them. Bit of a vicious circle.

Henlars67

Regularly using 'of' instead of 'have'

NoQuarter

Not having a car over 23 and depending on others for lifts! Grow up you bums!

My name is URL

Gee_G wrote: »

I think all people should have the desire to achieve. Whether it be through education, work, family, health. You have to have an aim,something to work towards

No you don't.. that's a relatively new human construct.

Really it comes down to what others would consider as 'failure'... and that's completely subjective.

I'm sure there are plenty of people who have never truly aspired to anything yet have found happiness and fulfillment in their lives, gone on to have kids & grand-kids and live to ripe old ages! I don't think they could be said to have failed in life simply because they lacked ambition or whatever.

13spanner

People who care too much about image, or what others think of them.

Obviously you have to put your best foot forward, but it can't control you

Mr_Spaceman

Does the OP only ever start depressing threads with one line?

At least offer up your own opinion to begin a discussion.

Gee_G

My name is URL wrote: »

No you don't.. that's a relatively new human construct.

Really it comes down to what others would consider as 'failure'... and that's completely subjective.

I'm sure there are plenty of people who have never truly aspired to anything yet have found happiness and fulfillment in their lives, gone on to have kids & grand-kids and live to ripe old ages! I don't think they could be said to have failed in life simply because they lacked ambition or whatever.

I never said they failed! My post was in reply to another poster asking what people should desire!

KegglesMcS

Someone who eats their own excrement.

iamstop

It used to be anything below 40% was a fail. Back in my day anyway.

Killer Wench

Alactric wrote: »

Not trying to put words in your mouth or anything...but your not really considering varying degrees of depression at all there man. I can tell you personally, if the people in your family realize there's something wrong they are in much, much better shape than some of the people I've seen.

I am considering the varying degrees of depression that I have observed. One relative had a stroke, and due to not being able to return to her profession, went through a period of major depression. It lasted for months but during that time, she began experiencing a fluid build-up in her knee and went to the doctor. Then a conversation about depression began.

Another relative suffers from bipolar disorder with a personality disorder, but after the birth of her child, went through a period of postpartum depression. Someone in the family took on caring for the infant while she went through her periods of heavy medication and stays in facilities. There were periods when she attempted suicide. Now, several years after the birth of her child, she still takes medication to control her manic episodes. Recently, she was put on medical leave due to speaking in tongues. In the last month, she has married and is expecting her second child.

There was a degree of family intervention, but there was also something within those people that triggered an alert that they were not like themselves. The person from the first story takes medication and will continue to take medication for the rest of their lives. A few years ago, they began hoarding and their home burned down, and we all thought it would put them back into a downward spiral. Instead, they clung to the idea of rebuilding and returning to their home.

mikehunts

Tom_Cruise wrote: »

What would you consider a failure?

Someone who thinks they are Tom Cruise!!!

BillyMitchel

KegglesMcS wrote: »

Someone who eats their own excrement.

There's a real famous porn star who eats crap for a living and there's an interview with her and she describes why she loves it and how she loves her belly full of crap. Cant think of the link but its the most vile interview I've ever seen.

Complex question OP. Everyone's life situation is different and everyone will make poor choices. Poverty stricken kids who grow up to be a success would be considered successful. So what about a rich kid who inherited their parents money and never worked or actually achieved anything would they be considered a failure?

Catch my drift? As I said complex, philosophical question and I'm not feeling very Plato tonight.

Dwork

I employ/ed a good lot of local men, close to 20 up until recently. Due to "recession", mad taxes(mainly tbh), cut throat(ie dumb and below cost)competition, and non-payers that has dwindled to five not including me. The dwindling has been very rapid and sh1tty. I see all my mates with small businesses suffering the same insidious dwindling, some of them a lot, lot worse. I feel that is a failure on my part. It probably isn't, really, (maybe it is), but it feels like a failure. An awful lot of people/families depend/ed on me to make money for them every week. Now I can only do it for a few. Which is a shitty feeling.

Da Shins Kelly

Killer Wench wrote: »

I am considering the varying degrees of depression that I have observed. One relative had a stroke, and due to not being able to return to her profession, went through a period of major depression. It lasted for months but during that time, she began experiencing a fluid build-up in her knee and went to the doctor. Then a conversation about depression began.

Another relative suffers from bipolar disorder with a personality disorder, but after the birth of her child, went through a period of postpartum depression. Someone in the family took on caring for the infant while she went through her periods of heavy medication and stays in facilities. There were periods when she attempted suicide. Now, several years after the birth of her child, she still takes medication to control her manic episodes. Recently, she was put on medical leave due to speaking in tongues. In the last month, she has married and is expecting her second child.

There was a degree of family intervention, but there was also something within those people that triggered an alert that they were not like themselves. The person from the first story takes medication and will continue to take medication for the rest of their lives. A few years ago, they began hoarding and their home burned down, and we all thought it would put them back into a downward spiral. Instead, they clung to the idea of rebuilding and returning to their home.

In fairness though, and fair play to those who do go and seek help, but there are a lot of people who suffer from depression who are too embarrassed to go and talk to anyone about it due to the stigma attached to mental illness, particularly in this country, and then there are many who may simply not realize that there is a major problem. Going and seeking help for a mental illness is a difficult thing to do.

Gee_G

Dwork wrote: »

I employ/ed a good lot of local men, close to 20 up until recently. Due to "recession", mad taxes(mainly tbh), cut throat(ie dumb and below cost)competition, and non-payers that has dwindled to five not including me. The dwindling has been very rapid and sh1tty. I see all my mates with small businesses suffering the same insidious dwindling, some of them a lot, lot worse. I feel that is a failure on my part. It probably isn't, really, (maybe it is), but it feels like a failure. An awful lot of people/families depend/ed on me to make money for them every week. Now I can only do it for a few. Which is a shitty feeling.

If it's any consolation I would say every person on here would say it definitely is not a failure on your part! I say fair play to you for getting yourself into that position to employ all those people in the first place!

con1421

Someone who refuses to work and instead claims the dole. I know 1 guy in particular who hasn't worked for 4 years and when I offered him a job he wouldn't take it

Dwork

Gee_G wrote: »

If it's any consolation I would say every person on here would say it definitely is not a failure on your part! I say fair play to you for getting yourself into that position to employ all those people in the first place!

Thanks, that actually means a lot. Not having the worlds best week.:)

Killer Wench

Da Shins Kelly wrote: »

In fairness though, and fair play to those who do go and seek help, but there are a lot of people who suffer from depression who are too embarrassed to go and talk to anyone about it due to the stigma attached to mental illness, particularly in this country, and then there are many who may simply not realize that there is a major problem. Going and seeking help for a mental illness is a difficult thing to do.

But is being too embarrassed to seek help the same thing as lacking a desire to get help? That's really what this string of conversation is about.

I have never met a failure at life. I have never met someone who didn't desire something. I have met people who have failed at something, but we all experience failure at some point.

Those two people I was speaking about were my own mother and one of my sisters. I, myself, suffer from anxiety disorder with agoraphobia. I understand the stigma attached to mental illness.

MiseryMary

Tom_Cruise wrote: »

What would you consider a failure?

Bronies guys in their 20s liking little girls cartoon my little ponys and collecting pony toys,wearing my little pony t shirts etc Its so sad seriously men.

Adult people who live off the welfare ,makes NO effort to find a job or do course what so ever they live with the parents ,they get everything handed to them on a silver plate (pampered by mommy and daddy) strangely enough they go on holidays enjoying themselves thinking they earn it ,the excuse for them not having a job they blame foreigners which i think is bull**** .

Backstabbers people who are friends with you at first and then become your enemy the next but its not just with friends it could be love a person man /woman you like and Who spitefully toy with your emotions to the point you get hurt bad, used , humiliated by these selfish individuals absolute **** or bitches because they haven't the respect to tell someone their not interested and break up in good terms , please don't lead people on if you have no interests what so ever .

thingamagig

You learn from your failures or misfortunes- you might even gain a bit of wisdom. If you're arrogant but successful you'll learn nothing only how to make money.

MickFleetwood

By not being happy or enjoying their life.

Stinicker

con1421 wrote: »

Someone who refuses to work and instead claims the dole. I know 1 guy in particular who hasn't worked for 4 years and when I offered him a job he wouldn't take it

You have to ask yourself though is it worth it? Working a horrible sh1tty job for minimum wages and then being taxed, the insane cost of fuel to commute to a job and then the massive loss of time which you previously had being unemployed. Then you factor into it the loss of entitlements like a medical card and social housing etc. I don't blame people who suck money from the state, the state sucks far too much money from working people and provides no incentive to go out to work, the Minimum wage in Ireland is €8.65/hour and should be at least €10/hour. The people on the dole have better lives than the drones in sector 7b working for peanuts in jobs they hate with no better prospects.

I consider these people as underachievers and the failures in life wheras the unemployed on the dole are smart people enjoying their lives better, basically cute hoors, making the best of a bad situation. Why go to work so the state can take all your earnings away and use it to bailout Fianna Fail cronies. The poor don't owe a penny while the rich all live in debt, to be very honest it is only a fool works today unless he/she is earning at least greater than €15/hour.

Scruffles

beings are not failiures;beings can always change,its the actions they do that may fail-seperate the person from the action.
seeing the self or someone else as a failiure is like saying will never get any better so just accept the person being a failiure.
but everyone has control to improve themselves,so how are they a failiure if the ability to
do better is there?
if people didnt fcuk up and make failiures they woud learn wrongly,people need to learn that things wont always go the way they want them to and that it can take a lot of hard work to get something right.

people who are on the dole and dont want to work,theyre not failiures,its the lack of motivation that them sitting on their arses all day can create as well as their attitude that makes them be like that.

maidie

The father of a beautiful clever little girl that he hasn't bothered with since she was couple of months old, because alcohol is number 1 on his list, even gave up work because the childs mother was pushing for maintainence. What a loser has no clue what he is missing and will never get back, plenty of invitiation for contact but always a no-show... Waste of space...

Alactric

MiseryMary wrote: »

Bronies guys in their 20s liking little girls cartoon my little ponys and collecting pony toys,wearing my little pony t shirts etc Its so sad seriously men.

This bothers you to the degree that you'd brand them literal failures?

MiseryMary

Alactric wrote: »

This bothers you to the degree that you'd brand them literal failures?

Well ya I mean these are adult men in their 20s walking around wearing a my little pony t-shirts and watch cartoons of them on youtube and stuff, I know of a guy who is like 24 years old I think he has My little pony T-shirts, posters on the wall and toys of my little ponys , goes to college wearing it , light green top with a big pink my little pony written bronie brothers for life.