Sexism you have personally experienced or have heard of? READ POST 1

Lemming · 15-12-2015 9:09pm

orubiru wrote: »

It's up to fathers to stop these insults and jokes.

I am reminded of the following quote and the article that went along with it and all of the absuridities within; its use should sum up the seriousness with which placing everything on the shoulders of fathers should be taken. Or taken in so much as the narrative would have us believe:

"Men, don't rape". (courtesy of Una Mullally)

um7y1h83ge06nx · 16-12-2015 1:10pm

This rape culture thing is just hilarious in many ways.

If these people believe there is a rape culture in this part of the world I really do have the ask them the question - who the fcuk do you socialise and associate with?!

These women are either irrational and suffering from some sort of delusions or they are hanging around with the absolute dregs of society.

It's just nuts.

orubiru · 16-12-2015 4:36pm

Darren Incalculable AcrossL wrote: »

This rape culture thing is just hilarious in many ways.

If these people believe there is a rape culture in this part of the world I really do have the ask them the question - who the fcuk do you socialise and associate with?!

These women are either irrational and suffering from some sort of delusions or they are hanging around with the absolute dregs of society.

It's just nuts.

In some parts of the western world, such as the USA, men in prison are raped on a regular basis.

A large percentage prison population are victims.
Perpetrators are rarely punished.
Everyone knows it happens.
The authorities know that it happens.
Not only is it tolerated but in the greater society it is largely treated as no big deal and often joked about.

Compare the reaction to some random criminal male being raped in prison to the reaction to a rape taking place in a college or university (reaction to the Rolling Stone article for example).

THAT is a "Rape Culture".

I'd argue that it's the most obvious example of "Rape Culture" in Western Society.

So when a Feminist says to you that "we need to end Rape Culture" and you ask them if they are talking about the widespread rape of men in the prison system, and the acceptance of that as a normal situation by our society? The answer is generally a resounding "NO".

They will happily claim that sexist jokes or gendered insults "contribute to rape culture". With no evidence to back that up.

They won't hesitate to tell you that objectification of women in movies and magazines "perpetuates Rape Culture". With no evidence to back that up.

Ask them if they think that mothers abusing their young sons for no good reason contributes to Rape Culture. After all, many perpetrators have been victims themselves. One way to stop men from becoming abusers is to stop abusing them when they are young boys, right?

We have a "Dear Daddy" campaign backed and disseminated by Feminist types and accompanied by the snarky "men just need to learn not to be terrible people" rhetoric. Would they be so willing to get behind a "Mothers! Stop physically and mentally abusing your sons!" campaign?

I mean what's more likely? Rapists are formed in a crucible of sexist media messages and jokes or rapists are fostered in abusive, neglectful, households?

Let's be honest here. None of these people are remotely interested in "Ending Rape Culture". They are interested in demonizing men. They hide their bitterness behind a veil of concern. It's sickening.

ancapailldorcha · 17-12-2015 10:53am

maybe

Darren Incalculable AcrossL wrote: »

This rape culture thing is just hilarious in many ways.

I wouldn't call it hilarious at all. It's permeated the one place where free exchange should be encouraged. Now we have censorship, free spaces and have allowed the lunatics to run the asylum in many areas.

LostinBlanch · 17-12-2015 2:38pm

maybe

UCAS, the British equivalent of the CAO, has just pointed out that males are 35% less likely to apply for college places. This widens to 52% in disadvantaged areas.

I wonder are the the figures similar here? Also what moves are going to be instigated to deal with this? Or, more pertinently, what will the reaction from the sisterhood be when they see *gasp* males being given quotas over females?

Will it be anything like the Swedish reaction to gender quotas favouring males over better qualified females after the sisterhood took their case to court.

Tobias Krantz, the Swedish education minister then said

The education system should open doors – not shut them in the face of young women who are motivated to study.

Which in itself is an admirable quote, but notice he said nothing about encouraging young men to do the same.

Carlos Orange · 17-12-2015 2:40pm

No

LostinBlanch wrote: »

UCAS, the British equivalent of the CAO, has just pointed out that males are 35% less likely to apply for college places. This widens to 52% in disadvantaged areas.

Women are 50% more likely to graduate from 3rd level than men in Ireland.
Like a lot of things it would be a headline if the genders were reversed.

DEFTLEFTHAND · 17-12-2015 6:27pm

ancapailldorcha wrote: »

I wouldn't call it hilarious at all. It's permeated the one place where free exchange should be encouraged. Now we have censorship, free spaces and have allowed the lunatics to run the asylum in many areas.

I watched a wonderful interview with author Christina Hoff on Mark Rubin's (ex TYT) channel last night. As a feminist herself she is absolutely disgusted with the current trend on US campuses.

She told a bizarre story of how 30 or so girls from a university fem soc staged a walkout from a talk she was giving and marched to their 'safe space' room. In this room they had a comfort dog, birdsong on the sound system and lots of arts and crafts materials. They stated that by having somebody like Hoff speak, certain girls could get triggered and be in danger of suffering from PTSS. I really wish I was making this up.

Instead of promoting being strong and independent like Hoff and her generation of Feminists did, these delusional paranoid girls are behaving like infants living in a make believe cloud cuckoo land.

Sleepy · 17-12-2015 6:31pm

That honestly sounds more like a sensory room for special needs kids than something on a college campus...

Wibbs · 17-12-2015 6:56pm

maybe

It's getting to farcical levels in US and Canadian campuses. Have a read of this from Psychology today Declining Student Resilience: A Serious Problem for Colleges
College personnel everywhere are struggling with students' increased neediness.

A year ago I received an invitation from the head of Counseling Services at a major university to join faculty and administrators for discussions about how to deal with the decline in resilience among students. At the first meeting, we learned that emergency calls to Counseling had more than doubled over the past five years. Students are increasingly seeking help for, and apparently having emotional crises over, problems of everyday life. Recent examples mentioned included a student who felt traumatized because her roommate had called her a “bitch” and two students who had sought counseling because they had seen a mouse in their off-campus apartment. The latter two also called the police, who kindly arrived and set a mousetrap for them.

Christ. Oh it goes downhill from there:

Faculty at the meetings noted that students’ emotional fragility has become a serious problem when it comes to grading. Some said they had grown afraid to give low grades for poor performance, because of the subsequent emotional crises they would have to deal with in their offices.

So now it's affecting grades and the learning process itself. How does the Onion remain relevant these days? Scary stuff. It's clearly starting with the coddling parents, throw in mounting pressures to be successful and a side order of media and and social media offering support for this kinda thinking and here we are.

ancapailldorcha · 17-12-2015 7:10pm

maybe

DEFTLEFTHAND wrote: »

I watched a wonderful interview with author Christina Hoff on Mark Rubin's (ex TYT) channel last night. As a feminist herself she is absolutely disgusted with the current trend on US campuses.

She told a bizarre story of how 30 or so girls from a university fem soc staged a walkout from a talk she was giving and marched to their 'safe space' room. In this room they had a comfort dog, birdsong on the sound system and lots of arts and crafts materials. They stated that by having somebody like Hoff speak, certain girls could get triggered and be in danger of suffering from PTSS. I really wish I was making this up.

Instead of promoting being strong and independent like Hoff and her generation of Feminists did, these delusional paranoid girls are behaving like infants living in a make believe cloud cuckoo land.

I don't know how I feel about him but I just watched him interview Milo Yiannopoulos and he suggested that he (Rubin) interview Hoff-Sommers.

Sadly, that story does not surprise me at all. Universities are meant to be a crucible of ideas and a melting pot of innovation. Instead we have people clutching to their supposed victimhood like vestigial teddy bears.

Pawwed Rig · 17-12-2015 7:42pm

DEFTLEFTHAND wrote: »

Instead of promoting being strong and independent like Hoff and her generation of Feminists did, these delusional paranoid girls are behaving like infants living in a make believe cloud cuckoo land.

This is why I hated the Dear Daddy video. It really victimises women to the extent that they are poor oppressed creatures cowering under the yoke of the domineering male. This is so far from the truth of what women in my life (past and present) are like. It seems a very peculiar way to portray women too from a feminist standpoint. It looks like demonising men is now more important than empowering women

The Black Oil · 17-12-2015 10:01pm

To be honest, I don't read a lot about college "safe spaces" because it's like fingernails on a blackboard. The problem with it, imo, is where do you draw the line? Is there some sort of promised land of safe spaces these people are going for, what's the end game?

Check out some of the bother Maryam Namazie ran into recently.

deaddonkey15 · 18-12-2015 8:43pm

Page 18 of today's Irish Independent, the picture accompanying the story about the ban on smoking in cars with children shows a child holding a sign that says "IT'S AGAINST THE LAW DAD".

Do women/mothers not smoke anymore?

mattP · 19-12-2015 9:34am

I just heard an ad on the radio offering support for people in situations of domestic abuse. It started off well using gender neutral words like "person" or "someone" and I smiled a little at the subtle progression, then it regressed rather quickly - "protecting women and children......for all women" -_-

silverharp · 20-12-2015 10:53am

a lot of sexism in this video :pac:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2jWBvtnS358

Carlos Orange · 22-12-2015 10:37am

No

Women in the office lobbying the boss that the person being hired for maternity cover(with an eye to a permanent role) be a women 'for gender balance'. They didn't seem too bothered about that the last time we were hiring when I would often be the only guy in the office with 3 or 4 women.

silverharp · 22-12-2015 11:40am

I noticed the xmas VdeP advert is full of stereotypes and all the "victims" shown are girls , we have the mean male landlord coming for his rent and it all hinges on whether the man in the video says yes or no to giving a donation.
oddly its the only video on their site with the comments and likes switched off so I wonder were they getting some heat?
was thinking of sending them a sarkey email saying that the advert was excellent and I wish to donate but can they guarantee that no men or boys are helped :pac:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hc13HDA-z1g

The Black Oil · 23-12-2015 5:01pm

ancapailldorcha wrote: »

Thanks for posting that, Black Oil. I'm not going to watch that yet as I can't stand that woman. The reason that I despise Jessica Valenti, Hadley Freeman or other trendy, white, wealthy, elitist Guardian feministas isn't down to hurt feelings on my part or that I think that they're sexist though the latter is certainly a contributing factor. No, the reason is that they've made me cynical towards women's issues and that's wrong. I read a good post on Facebook recently about how women in the third world struggle with menstruation. It's clearly something that needs action. Ms. Valenti has also written on this topic but with a slight difference. Instead of bringing attention to the suffering of women in developing nations, she opts instead to moan about how she has to be for feminine hygiene products which she feels should be free. At the end, we're treated to a Gloria Steinem quote: "if men got periods, they “would brag about how long and how much"". This is just one example of the kind of insipid nonsense she continually espouses (1). Valenti identifies the most minor aspect of the issue which I suppose isn't surprising given the Guardian's readership and goes in for the kill. It's sad. I've caught flak for saying that the world still needs feminism on Facebook but I think that's true. However, when I see a piece on the Guardian, Buzzfeed or elsewhere else about feminism, I'm immediately dismissive in the same way I would be about an article promoting homeopathy.

Did you watch it in the end? Or maybe try slamming your hand in the car door, about the same as reading Valenti.

23-12-2015 5:06pm

Grabbed in crotch/ass repeatedly and expected to be fine with it.
pushed in front of at bars
Expected to, as night club security, defend myself against a glass wielding maniac by gently disarming her.
Told that I was, as a man, probably earning more than female colleagues and that I should be ashamed.

Societal one is the white ribbon campaign but hey, let's say all men are abusers (potential abusers) and ignore women abusing men (had one crazy ex think that it was ok, in a social setting, to say "I could hurt you" while digging her nails into my my cheeks and jaw

ancapailldorcha · 23-12-2015 9:07pm

maybe

The Black Oil wrote: »

Did you watch it in the end? Or maybe try slamming your hand in the car door, about the same as reading Valenti.

I... actually forgot completely about it. I might give it a go when I get back from the parents' house next week. Can't guarantee I'll watch the whole thing because, y'know, Valenti....

EDIT: I've had a go at watching the Valenti portion. She reorts to anecdotes constantly and also uses ambiguous language such as "According to the department of justice, someone is sexually assaulted every 2 minutes". I got as far as her bringing up the Carry That Weight incident as some feat worthy of repetition and mimicry by others along with the usual cries for censorship and other nonsense. A lot of fishy stuff went down in the CTW incident and it's telling that Valenti finds it inspirational.

I'm not surprise that the likes of Milo Yiannopoulos are gaining popularity and influence. I find him odious and smug. However, he does question the prevailing narrative of patriarchy, rape culture and safe species albeit in a patronising manner. Did anyone watch BBC Three's documentary last week about this by any chance? It wasn't as balanced as I'd have liked but it's nice to see the other side getting some sort of mainstream attention.

The Black Oil · 24-12-2015 12:09am

I searched for the quote you referenced - "According to the department of justice, someone is sexually assaulted every 2 minutes". Given the size of the US population, it wouldn't surprise me if it's accurate, but it's not to say Valenti's reporting or narrative can't be questioned. The quote is noted on some sites supporting those who've been sexually assaulted or raped. It seems to be from a 2010 report with 2007 data. I haven't really got the time to examine it in detail and it's a general crime report, not a rape specific one.

What might be more interesting, and considering the headlines there have been about rape on college campuses, is this more recent report, which looks at the period from 1995-2013. A large percentage of those who've been raped or assaulted don't seem to get treatment, which is worrying. Of course, there's non-reporting too. There are methodological variations with the data, which are probably more varied than what's used in this country, I'm guessing. I still find it a bit crazy that colleges have any investigatory role for such a serious crime.

As to CTW, that's the type of story that takes on a life of its own because of the web. When I read about it a while back I thought it was a bit of a head scratcher.

Do check out the other speaker in the video, though. She wraps her piece with "Do not build justice for women on injustice for men". Tonally, that's world away from Valenti who bemoans the challenging of the existence of rape culture. We're going to get a point now, if we're not there already, where questioning* RC as a seemingly ideological standpoint driven by certain entrenched feminists is seen not as reasonable debate, but as tolerating RC in the first instance. And men who question it will be tarred as unsympathetic and thereby likely facilitators of RC.

*Not to say there aren't huge issues around how rape is dealt with and factors underlining it, of course there are.

ancapailldorcha · 24-12-2015 12:19am

maybe

The Black Oil wrote: »

I searched for the quote you referenced - "According to the department of justice, someone is sexually assaulted every 2 minutes". Given the size of the US population, it wouldn't surprise me if it's accurate, but it's not to say Valenti's reporting or narrative can't be questioned. The quote is noted on some sites supporting those who've been sexually assaulted or raped. It seems to be from a 2010 report with 2007 data. I haven't really got the time to examine it in detail and it's a general crime report, not a rape specific one.

What might be more interesting, and considering the headlines there have been about rape on college campuses, is this more recent report, which looks at the period from 1995-2013. A large percentage of those who've been raped or assaulted don't seem to get treatment, which is worrying. Of course, there's non-reporting too. There are methodological variations with the data, which are probably more varied than what's used in this country, I'm guessing. I still find it a bit crazy that colleges have any investigatory role for such a serious crime.

As to CTW, that's the type of story that takes on a life of its own because of the web. When I read about it a while back I thought it was a bit of a head scratcher.

Do check out the other speaker in the video, though. She wraps her piece with "Do not build justice for women on injustice for men". Tonally, that's world away from Valenti who bemoans the challenging of the existence of rape culture. We're going to get a point now, if we're not there already, where questioning* RC as a seemingly ideological standpoint driven by certain entrenched feminists is seen not as reasonable debate, but as tolerating RC in the first instance. And men who question it will be tarred as unsympathetic and thereby likely facilitators of RC.

*Not to say there aren't huge issues around how rape is dealt with and factors underlining it, of course there are.

It's about 26:55 into your video. I'll watch it in full at some point though not now as I've nearly been up for 24 straight hours going home for the holiday.

I wouldn't call myself someone who'll come out with guff like "feminism's done its job" and "women have achieved equality". There is still work to be done. However, given her record, Valenti and her ilk are the last ones who should be entrusted with such crucial responsibility.

NachoBusiness · 29-12-2015 11:33pm

New law being brought into effect in the UK to deal with "Controlling or coercive behaviour" in relationships. From what I can tell this law appears to not be gender specific, but almost all media reporting it are reporting it as if the legislation has been solely drafted to deal with men.

Women's Aid for example said:

"Coercive controlling behavior that reduces a WOMAN'S freedom to act.

In a sense it takes HER fundamental human rights.

It takes away HER life.

SHE has no space for action."

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Jq4uWP0qM3Y

Even the so called 'woman hating' Daily Mail have taken that tack.

Although they did at least mention the fact that men also are victims of domestic violence whereas most of the others did not.

Lemming · 29-12-2015 11:52pm

Whilst it gives a positive sign that all of the (official) literature around this new legal framework is deliberately gender-neutral, the question that remains to be answered is just how accepting the powers that be will be for a woman coming forward vs. a man doing the same under this new legal framework, and what burden of proof will be accepted in both instances in order to see action taken against their alleged abuser.

At the back of my head, I suspect that this law will see a lot more women prosecuted than men as they [women] would seem - anecdotally at least - far more likely to use emotional abuse rather than physical abuse against a partner in order to control them. If that is the case, there is a cynical volce off to one side of my head that expects said legal framework to be quietly shelved.

Edit: At the end of the day though, all of the above may be quite moot given the difficulty of proving some of what has been mentioned as control without deferring to "he said, she said" arguments, so it all may just end up being a bit of a feel-good exercise for politicians, quangos, and civil servants.

py2006 · 06-01-2016 7:42pm

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QarafroHL44

JRant · 09-01-2016 12:59am

Quite possibly one of the most patronizing ads I've seen in a long time.

GloHealth doing their bit to keep the tender years doctrine alive and well.

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=0DZtiXk5U64

tommyboy2222 · 09-01-2016 4:01pm

Not offended by this ad but could you imagine the outcry if the genders were reversed.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YdHfF4PEaFE

um7y1h83ge06nx · 13-01-2016 1:51pm

JRant wrote: »

Quite possibly one of the most patronizing ads I've seen in a long time.

GloHealth doing their bit to keep the tender years doctrine alive and well.

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=0DZtiXk5U64

Some sh*te alright. My OH and I commented about it when we saw it on TV.

They are aiming the service as almost exclusive for mother's, what if a father wants to use it or has to as they are a single parent family. :rolleyes:

Mothers, You’re amazing. Here at GloHealth we know just how much you do for your family, so let us do something for you.
Introducing GloDoc. A doctor who’s there 24/7 on phone & online.

Someone should be a pr!ck, email them and say their partner, the mother of their kids is dead and could they access the service too. Stupid marketing.