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Women and money

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  • Registered Users Posts: 6,645 ✭✭✭IzzyWizzy


    SunnyDub1 wrote: »
    Just because someone gets a loan it doesn't mean that they can't pay their way or are struggling:confused: . What if it's the case that it's coming to the end of the month and one needs to take a loan for an unexpected trip to the doctor.

    I work full time, good paid job and get paid monthly. On a rare occasion an unexpected expense might come up like a bill, medical expense at the end of the month, If I haven't got money in my account , rather then "struggling" I will get a lend and pay it back to who ever soon as I get paid. Doesn't mean that I can't pay my way or manage my finances.

    :confused:

    There's this really cool new idea called savings! I've got this thing called a savings account, which I put money into every month. When I was earning a reasonable wage, I could put away 200-250 a month (no more, because living in London is very expensive) and now that I'm much poorer, I try to put away 20-50 a month if I can. If a medical expense or a bill comes up, what I do is I take the money out of my savings account! That way, I don't need to bother friends and family members who have their own financial issues and lives to worry about.

    On a less sarcastic note, I'd say that saving for a 'rainy day' (which means that unexpected hospital stay or flight home for a funeral or electricity bill, as well as 'fun stuff') is surely one of the most basic parts of managing your finances. What on earth is an adult with a well-paid job doing borrowing money for things they should have budgeted for in the first place? :confused: If you're living paycheck to paycheck when you don't have to, you're not financially responsible.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,439 ✭✭✭SunnyDub1


    IzzyWizzy wrote: »
    :confused:

    There's this really cool new idea called savings! I've got this thing called a savings account, which I put money into every month. When I was earning a reasonable wage, I could put away 200-250 a month (no more, because living in London is very expensive) and now that I'm much poorer, I try to put away 20-50 a month if I can. If a medical expense or a bill comes up, what I do is I take the money out of my savings account! That way, I don't need to bother friends and family members who have their own financial issues and lives to worry about.

    On a less sarcastic note, I'd say that saving for a 'rainy day' (which means that unexpected hospital stay or flight home for a funeral or electricity bill, as well as 'fun stuff') is surely one of the most basic parts of managing your finances. What on earth is an adult with a well-paid job doing borrowing money for things they should have budgeted for in the first place? :confused: If you're living paycheck to paycheck when you don't have to, you're not financially responsible.


    Aren't you bloody marvelous. Good for you! I also do that cool idea and btw it's not new :cool:
    From my first post
    I am in a what some would call a "good" paid job but even at times I may need to take a lend from a parent/ sibling to pay a bill etc. But It doesn't mean I don't save, and think about the future. I know if I dip into my savings I won't but the money back :oso I think it's best to just borrow sometimes - providing it is a short term loan and it's not putting anyone out of pocket by much.

    Everyone is different, and for ME - I prefer to take a lend from someone where I know I'd have to pay it back. Rather then dipping into savings where I most likely won't put the money back. I get a lend on a very rare occasion. I work out a budget each month for myself that I manage fine on, while saving a good chunk and living comfortably.

    You don't know me or anythinng about my finanaces/what I pay on bills, what expenses I have, what I earn so don't judge on what I am responsible for and what I am not, when you have no clue about me!


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 5,844 ✭✭✭Honey-ec


    IzzyWizzy wrote: »
    If you're living paycheck to paycheck when you don't have to, you're not financially responsible.

    Some people do have to, though. That doesn't make them financially irresponsible.

    My sister earns a fucking massive salary, imo. But she lives paycheck to paycheck because she's the sole provider for herself and her two kids and by the time she pays the mortgage, the childminder, the bills, feeds the three of them, etc. there's literally a couple of cent leftover at the end of the month. All the confused smilies in the world doesn't change the fact that some people can't afford to save anything, and it's not necessarily because of bad fiscal management.


  • Registered Users Posts: 17,495 ✭✭✭✭eviltwin


    IzzyWizzy wrote: »



    There's this really cool new idea called savings! I've got this thing called a savings account, which I put money into every month. When I was earning a reasonable wage, I could put away 200-250 a month (no more, because living in London is very expensive) and now that I'm much poorer, I try to put away 20-50 a month if I can. If a medical expense or a bill comes up, what I do is I take the money out of my savings account! That way, I don't need to bother friends and family members who have their own financial issues and lives to worry about.



    On a less sarcastic note, I'd say that saving for a 'rainy day' (which means that unexpected hospital stay or flight home for a funeral or electricity bill, as well as 'fun stuff') is surely one of the most basic parts of managing your finances. What on earth is an adult with a well-paid job doing borrowing money for things they should have budgeted for in the first place? If you're living paycheck to paycheck when you don't have to, you're not financially responsible.


    You do realise not everyone has the means to save these days don't you?


  • Registered Users Posts: 6,645 ✭✭✭IzzyWizzy


    SunnyDub1 wrote: »
    Aren't you bloody marvelous. Good for you! I also do that cool idea and btw it's not new :cool:
    From my first post


    Everyone is different, and for ME - I prefer to take a lend from someone where I know I'd have to pay it back. Rather then dipping into savings where I most likely won't put the money back. I get a lend on a very rare occasion. I work out a budget each month for myself that I manage fine on, while saving a good chunk and living comfortably.

    You don't know me or anythinng about my finanaces so don't judge on what I am responsible for and what I am not!

    I'm going by what you posted. You said asking other people for money doesn't mean you can't manage your money. I beg to differ. That's my opinion. I would feel very, very bad asking someone else for money except in the most extreme circumstances. I wouldn't consider it an option to ask family or friends for money just because I didn't feel like dipping into my savings and my parents wouldn't stand for it. This is what the thread is about, isn't it?
    Honey-ec wrote: »
    Some people do have to, though. That doesn't make them financially irresponsible, it means they're earning a rubbish wage.

    My sister earns a fucking massive salary, imo. But she lives paycheck to paycheck because she's the sole provider for herself and her two kids and by the time she pays the mortgage, the childminder, the bills, feeds the three of them, etc. there's literally a couple of cent leftover at the end of the month. All the confused smilies in the world doesn't change the fact that some people can't afford to save anything, and it's not necessarily because of bad fiscal management.

    Which is exactly why I added when they don't have to. I'm well aware that some people genuinely CAN'T save. But there are a lot of people making good money who seem unable to foresee anything remotely unexpected happening.

    My ex-flatmate used to claim that she budgeted really well, yet EVERY SINGLE MONTH, there would be some 'emergency' that she had to borrow money for. Gas bill, doctors bill, car repairs. She didn't seem to get that these 'emergencies' are also known as 'life' to most of us. This stuff happens to everybody. She was 10 years older than me and had a good job (as an accountant - hah) but just didn't seem to get the concept of not spending every cent of your wages and leaving yourself completely broke each month. She used to ask me how I always had so much left over every month when I had such a crap job - my answer of 'because I don't spend it all' left her baffled.


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  • Registered Users Posts: 6,645 ✭✭✭IzzyWizzy


    eviltwin wrote: »
    You do realise not everyone has the means to save these days don't you?

    Yes, I do and I think I addressed that. I'm talking about adults who are well-paid (and say so themselves), but borrow money from other people because they don't want to save, or don't want to dip into their savings.


  • Registered Users Posts: 173 ✭✭Nymeria


    Morag wrote: »
    Princess syndrome can happen and there is a mentality of some parents, paying car loans or insurance ect for their adult daughters so that the daughters can keep up a certain lifestyle or 'look' until they find the right caliber of husband who and then pay their way.

    Again with the annoying stereotypes. And with the assumption that women only borrow money or get into debt to maintain a superficial lifestyle - who are you or who am I to say what someone should or shouldn't get off their parents.

    If it was mum and dad paying a deposit on a house or university fees would that be acceptable by your standards? Most parents help out their children when they can. Plenty of parents give their sons handouts as well, without being given a ridiculous moniker of 'princess syndrome'.


  • Registered Users Posts: 8,423 ✭✭✭Morag


    Nymeria wrote: »
    Again with the annoying stereotypes. And with the assumption that women only borrow money or get into debt to maintain a superficial lifestyle - who are you or who am I to say what someone should or shouldn't get off their parents.

    If it was mum and dad paying a deposit on a house or university fees would that be acceptable by your standards? Most parents help out their children when they can. Plenty of parents give their sons handouts as well, without being given a ridiculous moniker of 'princess syndrome'.

    I don't think it's a sterotype, I know of a few young women which this has been the case for, I disagree with parents who don't bring up their kids to be self reliant.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 829 ✭✭✭xLexie


    Morag wrote: »

    I don't think it's a sterotype, I know of a few young women which this has been the case for, I disagree with parents who don't bring up their kids to be self reliant.
    Yes but it doesn't mean they're wrong and you're right.


  • Registered Users Posts: 173 ✭✭Nymeria


    Morag wrote: »
    I don't think it's a sterotype, I know of a few young women which this has been the case for, I disagree with parents who don't bring up their kids to be self reliant.

    Fair enough, however the example you gave in your original post seemed to infer that the money was being give for frivolous items to maintain a certain lifestyle, and that these women were biding their time until a husband came along. It just seems an unnecessarily judgmental observation of what they spend money on and where they get it.

    My point is that plenty of young men get hand outs from their parents too, and that would not necessarily elicit the same type of 'princess syndrome' response, as though these women spend their whole lives expecting to be taken care of.


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  • Registered Users Posts: 8,423 ✭✭✭Morag


    Nymeria wrote: »
    Fair enough, however the example you gave in your original post seemed to infer that the money was being give for frivolous items to maintain a certain lifestyle, and that these women were biding their time until a husband came along. It just seems an unnecessarily judgmental observation of what they spend money on and where they get it.

    My point is that plenty of young men get hand outs from their parents too, and that would not necessarily elicit the same type of 'princess syndrome' response, as though these women spend their whole lives expecting to be taken care of.

    Actually they do/did, went to college more in mind of getting an MRS then a degree. They think that is how life is as their parents have reared them that way.

    It's not every young woman, but there are some, and I think they're parents do them a disservice
    .


    I don't have an issue with parents helping out, it's nice and unexpected, but that is different then being dependent on them to pay for the every day expenses such as rent/car loan when you are a grown up and working.


  • Registered Users Posts: 12,373 ✭✭✭✭mariaalice


    Honey-ec wrote: »
    Some people do have to, though. That doesn't make them financially irresponsible.

    My sister earns a fucking massive salary, IMO. But she lives paycheck to paycheck because she's the sole provider for herself and her two kids and by the time she pays the mortgage, the child minder, the bills, feeds the three of them, etc. there's literally a couple of cent leftover at the end of the month. All the confused smilies in the world doesn't change the fact that some people can't afford to save anything, and it's not necessarily because of bad fiscal management.

    I realised maybe my thread is not very clear.

    Its not about people such as the above or any situation like that, or anyone financing their education etc. or people who do not earn a lot of money or who are at the start of the careerer.

    I suppose its about how people make their choices when they are in a position to choose. Lifestyle and living in the here and now verses providing for the future.

    As for parents helping the children even when the "child" is in their thirties of course its totally their own choice to do so..... but I am allowed to have an opinion about this and having an opinion is not the same as making a judgement about something, this is a discussion site.

    I would help my children with major life transitions such as buying their own house ( but I would not provide the deposit for a house if they had not saved for the deposit themselves ) I have paid for college for my children and I have paid the college fees for someone who's parents are not a in a position to do it for them, they paid me back from their part time job, This person walked 10k home from their part time job one evening because they had no money for the bus.

    Or maybe I am just an old crank:P


  • Registered Users Posts: 13,261 ✭✭✭✭fits


    In one way I think education at school could be a lot better. Budgeting and financial planning is a basic skill everyone should have. Transition year could be used for this type of education.

    On the other hand nearly everyone I know was an eejit with their money at one stage or another. Some learn their lessons and some don't.

    If you've a good job, expecting your parents to pay your car insurance is not really on. Its not like you don't see that expense coming.


  • Registered Users Posts: 11,624 ✭✭✭✭meeeeh


    A former friend of mine (there was no falling out, we just drifted apart) had great lifestyle. At twenty three she was living in her own flat, she had great clothes and buying them all the time. She was going out a lot. I was wondering a bit because she was working for hr father who was insurance broker and I thought her pay was ok but not great. It turned out she wasn't passing on all the insurance money people paid. She even kept money two of her oldest friends paid for car insurance. The insurance company that they were mostly working for found out and it almost destroyed her father. He had to get a sizeable loan to pay them back.

    Some people just think they are entitled to certain lifestyle regardless of their means. They are minority but you would just like to shake them up and tell them to cop on.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 5,987 ✭✭✭Legs.Eleven


    I haven't come across any women that you're referring to and that's the honest truth. Irish women, compared to women of other nationalities (the States, Spain, Italy, Eastern Europe) are the most self-sufficient I've ever come across.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 4,390 ✭✭✭clairefontaine


    I haven't come across any women that you're referring to and that's the honest truth. Irish women, compared to women of other nationalities (the States, Spain, Italy, Eastern Europe) are the most self-sufficient I've ever come across.

    Ive come across women and men whose parents support them through internships while others are working as baristas to pay off student loans.

    I've also come across families that invest only in the males, often the first born.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 3,802 ✭✭✭beks101


    I sort of had it beat into me as a kid that it's important to have a nest egg of savings at all times and I feel uneasy when I don't have at least three months' wages in my savings at all times.

    But I think if you're in a position to, it's important to enjoy yourself too, and not be riddled with Catholic guilt every time you put your hand in your pocket and splash out on something you've worked hard to afford.

    I work bloody hard, I've earned every cent that goes into my bank account and I'll be damned if I'm going to skip the nights out, the trips away, the blow-dries, the occasional shopping trips...to be completely prudent when I'll spend the rest of my life doing that anyway. I'm single, in my twenties and living abroad during what will probably be the most free and most fun years of my life. I'm lucky enough to have full time employment and few responsibilities, why shouldn't I enjoy it?

    I don't think you can judge these things. Everyone has different priorities in life, their spending habits will reflect that. Mine isn't to settle down and buy a house any time soon; I've got a few more years of travel in me before I settle anywhere. I think the Irish obsession with home ownership is a bit outdated anyway, we should adjust our attitudes on that in accordance with the massive disaster we've just gone through.

    My financial priorities are to pay my bills, rent, daily and weekly expenses, have enough to socialize and travel outside of that, and have enough savings to be fine if it all goes pear-shaped in the morning. I'm not interested in counting my pennies, but I've not been raised to not know its value either.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 4,390 ✭✭✭clairefontaine


    It would be productive if those who are very good with savings and money were to share their methods, particularly if you are car dependant. Like a recessionist's handbook.

    I got a second hand Christmas card this year. Something I had never thought of. At first I thought, wow, that's a new one, but really it's not a bad idea.


  • Registered Users Posts: 6,649 ✭✭✭Catari Jaguar


    I know a girl who is just spoiled rotten, come pay day is all "Oh thank god, I am sooo broke, thank god for credit cards, blah blah whinge...", she lives at home like, not worrying about rent/ bills. Then says things like "Yea, I want a new car, just feel like another change. Want my old jeep back. Would love a 2 litre or more. My tax now is €1200 a year for 1.8 ltr." Another girl called her an ass saying she could buy a car for that price, but the girl wants what she wants. "Yea, you know when you're shopping and you go in to Penneys for a few things and then it's like, oooh these are nice jeans, so you just fire a pair in every colour into your basket and grab loads of little things and it ends up being over a hundred quid." She has hundreds of pairs of shoes. Just yea, I don't know what planet she lives on. I don't intend to ever visit!


  • Registered Users Posts: 12,373 ✭✭✭✭mariaalice


    A stereotype doesn't mean it doesn't exist. There is many a truth in a stereotype [just look at the Irish and drinking for an example], it's just dangerous when you slur an entire group of people with it.

    If I titled this THE JEWS AND MONEY.... yes I would be banned.

    And said "I know a fair few Jews where this has been the case..." blah blah blah...

    I am completely confused now are you saying we cant have any threads that says...woman and x ( x being any issue ) because it excludes men or it might lead to a a reply from another boardsie that allude to a clichéd stereo type?....

    I though this thread might lead to a discussion about woman reflections on money.

    I looked this up earlier and apparently woman do have a different emotional response to money than men do.


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  • Registered Users Posts: 6,691 ✭✭✭Lia_lia


    Ha! This is funny because in my family my brother is the spoiled one. He is 21 and has never had a job in his life. My Mother and Father pay for his college/rent/living money/car insurance/everything. I've been working since I was 15 and since then I've been expected to pay for everything myself. I pay for college myself. Bills/food/etc. I get a grant alright but also have to work 2 jobs to stay on top of things. Even paid €4,000+ this year to get braces because my parents would never get them for me when I was younger.


    It does often depend on the situation, though. My family could never really afford much anyway and once I proved I am self-sufficient they were kinda like..yay..less money to find to for kids!

    But I don't think in any way it's a gender thing. Not in this country anyway.


  • Posts: 50,630 ✭✭✭✭ [Deleted User]


    So I just wing it.

    Mod

    That's not winging it, that's trolling, and it's not welcome here - or anywhere on this site. This is your only warning on the matter.


  • Registered Users Posts: 11,624 ✭✭✭✭meeeeh


    I haven't come across any women that you're referring to and that's the honest truth. Irish women, compared to women of other nationalities (the States, Spain, Italy, Eastern Europe) are the most self-sufficient I've ever come across.
    Yes because they are better paid. It's a lot easier to be self sufficient when you have decent wages. It's hard to generalise, statistically some nationalities have bigger savings, some would consider stay at home mums a big no no, in some countries family supplements social welfare... Even the definition of self sufficiency could differ from couture to couture. The same goes for men.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,439 ✭✭✭SunnyDub1


    IzzyWizzy wrote: »
    I'm going by what you posted. You said asking other people for money doesn't mean you can't manage your money. I beg to differ. That's my opinion. I would feel very, very bad asking someone else for money except in the most extreme circumstances. I wouldn't consider it an option to ask family or friends for money just because I didn't feel like dipping into my savings and my parents wouldn't stand for it. This is what the thread is about, isn't it?

    It's not a case of just "dipping into my savings" though.
    My money is saved into a Credit Union account, that isn't near my job and only opens Monday-Friday 9-5. So if I wanted to take money out of my savings to pay a bill etc it would involve taking a day off or half day from work - all for the sake of say for example €50 to cover a bill :rolleyes:
    when my family/friends are kind, obliging and don't see any issue with helping a friend/sibling out with a lend for a couple of days until I get paid.
    Just like the way if it was the other way around I'd happily help out.
    Nothing to feel bad about, If you would feel bad about something simple like that well then that's just petty. That's my opinion :cool:


  • Registered Users Posts: 6,645 ✭✭✭IzzyWizzy


    beks101 wrote: »
    I sort of had it beat into me as a kid that it's important to have a nest egg of savings at all times and I feel uneasy when I don't have at least three months' wages in my savings at all times.

    But I think if you're in a position to, it's important to enjoy yourself too, and not be riddled with Catholic guilt every time you put your hand in your pocket and splash out on something you've worked hard to afford.

    I work bloody hard, I've earned every cent that goes into my bank account and I'll be damned if I'm going to skip the nights out, the trips away, the blow-dries, the occasional shopping trips...to be completely prudent when I'll spend the rest of my life doing that anyway. I'm single, in my twenties and living abroad during what will probably be the most free and most fun years of my life. I'm lucky enough to have full time employment and few responsibilities, why shouldn't I enjoy it?

    I don't think you can judge these things. Everyone has different priorities in life, their spending habits will reflect that. Mine isn't to settle down and buy a house any time soon; I've got a few more years of travel in me before I settle anywhere. I think the Irish obsession with home ownership is a bit outdated anyway, we should adjust our attitudes on that in accordance with the massive disaster we've just gone through.

    My financial priorities are to pay my bills, rent, daily and weekly expenses, have enough to socialize and travel outside of that, and have enough savings to be fine if it all goes pear-shaped in the morning. I'm not interested in counting my pennies, but I've not been raised to not know its value either.

    That's the thing, though, you can afford to do it on your own. No issues. I know people well into their thirties who try to have the lifestyle you describe (new shoes all the time, meals out, weekends away every few weeks) when they are earning a low salary. They then expect their parents to subsidise them. One 37-year-old at my old job asked her parents to pay almost 3 grand for her to do her teaching diploma. When I expressed surprise that she was still being supported by her parents at her age, she basically said it wasn't her fault she didn't have the money. :confused: I wanted to tell her that if she'd skipped the 2 trips to Majorca, the Louboutin shoes, the weekly manicures and waxing, she would have probably saved that money in under a year, but she wouldn't have understood. Some people really do have that sense of entitlement. Let the parents pay for the 'boring' stuff. That attitude drives me mad.


  • Registered Users Posts: 6,645 ✭✭✭IzzyWizzy


    SunnyDub1 wrote: »
    It's not a case of just "dipping into my savings" though.
    My money is saved into a Credit Union account, that isn't near my job and only opens Monday-Friday 9-5. So if I wanted to take money out of my savings to pay a bill etc it would involve taking a day off or half day from work - all for the sake of say for example €50 to cover a bill :rolleyes:
    when my family/friends are kind, obliging and don't see any issue with helping a friend/sibling out with a lend for a couple of days until I get paid.
    Just like the way if it was the other way around I'd happily help out.
    Nothing to feel bad about, If you would feel bad about something simple like that well then that's just petty. That's my opinion :cool:

    I don't think it's petty. I don't like to inconvenience people and most of the time, it IS an inconvenience to lend someone money. My family would ask me why I couldn't put money for bills etc (hardly that unexpected) into an accessible account. It isn't your family or friends' problem that your money is in the Credit Union and you can't get to it easily!

    I don't know, I was brought up to look after my own issues and not bother other people with things I should sort out myself. I've never met anyone who truly enjoyed lending money to other people. It's one thing if it's a total emergency and/or something unforeseen (like a family member stranded abroad after being robbed), but most people I know wouldn't have much patience for being asked for money to cover other people's bills. Whether they said it to the person's face or not. Guess we'll have to agree to disagree.


  • Registered Users Posts: 3,706 ✭✭✭seenitall


    SunnyDub1 wrote: »
    It's not a case of just "dipping into my savings" though.
    My money is saved into a Credit Union account, that isn't near my job and only opens Monday-Friday 9-5. So if I wanted to take money out of my savings to pay a bill etc it would involve taking a day off or half day from work - all for the sake of say for example €50 to cover a bill :rolleyes:
    when my family/friends are kind, obliging and don't see any issue with helping a friend/sibling out with a lend for a couple of days until I get paid.
    Just like the way if it was the other way around I'd happily help out.
    Nothing to feel bad about, If you would feel bad about something simple like that well then that's just petty. That's my opinion :cool:

    It's all a matter of perspective, a matter of individual inclinations, if you will.

    So no-one is right or wrong, petty or unwise, for how they handle their finances, as long as their way works for them. IMO.

    But the problem is, money is a very sensitive subject, as in our brain this subject is tied up with survival, so judgments on other people's handling of money are very easy to come by.

    For my part, I'd infinitely rather be owing money to myself (in the way of going into my savings for anything unexpected), than to any other person, be they family, friend or foe.

    Perhaps it is that I know I have the self-discipline to put money back into my savings account ASAP, or maybe it is the way I was raised; my mother, for example, is almost 70 now, a pensioner back home with a regular enough job while she was working, and she has only once ever gone into the 'red' with anyone/anything in all her life (it was about a big purchase). Managing money well is like second nature to her.

    It doesn't stop at individual differences either, I'd say plenty of issues are cultural here (as already touched upon). (Also, I don't want to come across as horribly up myself as concerns this topic, so I have to say, as I grew up in a communist country, if there is anything to be said for that, is that people had to know how to budget to their last penny. There wasn't any surplus money lying around for anyone but those most astute at budgeting and scrimping and saving [not talking about the higher-echelons top-brass commie honchos of course! :)]. That's what I saw growing up, and that's the approach to money I assimilated and acquired, whether I'm earning or not, whether I'm able to save a few thousand a year or a mere couple of hundred.)

    (^^ Also, I have to say, it was all made easier by the fact that there were no consumer goods to speak of, to 'tempt' people. biggrin.png)

    Saving money is almost like my own personal law issued to myself; it has to be sustained in all but most destitute times.

    When I see something I want, I ask myself a few questions: "Do I really need this dress/those shoes/that cream?" The answer is NO in 90% of the cases. Sometimes I'm not happy with the answer, so I ask myself: "Can you afford this if you want it so badly?" The answer could well be YES, THIS IS ALLOWED at that point in time, so then I add on the caveat to myself that I will buy this item but I will abstain from buying anything else non-essential for the next few weeks, just to satisfy my inner balance-keeper.

    And so on.

    I know, I'm completely bonkers. :P But it works for me.


  • Registered Users Posts: 71 ✭✭hedgehog21


    Whispered wrote: »
    I live day in day out, it's through necessity at the moment. It doesn't bother me too much at all. I'm currently building a career in a whole new industry and I had to decide if it was worth taking a hit on my wages. Well a few months in and it absolutely was. I can't save, and I have no money left for myself after paying bills, contributing to the mortgage and other necessary stuff.

    I have genuinely never been less financially secure in my life, but I have never been happier.
    Some people are living pay day to pay day, but what bugs me is the people who are apparently broke but still going on holidays 2/3 times a year.
    In my experience these people always do manage to meet somebody who will bail them out. I have met a lot of women in particular like this down through the years. They spend like there is no tomorrow and never think of the 'rainy day' and yet when the rainy day arrives there is always somebody around to help them so they actually never learn from the experience. Maybe they are right not to be too concerned about the future and just live in the moment, I don't know.
    You cant take it with you,
    unfortunately I do have very bad spending habits and Im usually broke 2 weeks after pay day, but for me, I just find shopping a stress reliever and it also comes from a childhood where money was tight, so possibly I ve gone nuts.


  • Registered Users Posts: 1,028 ✭✭✭Daisy78


    seenitall wrote: »

    It's all a matter of perspective, a matter of individual inclinations, if you will.

    So no-one is right or wrong, petty or unwise, for how they handle their finances, as long as their way works for them. IMO.

    But the problem is, money is a very sensitive subject, as in our brain this subject is tied up with survival, so judgments on other people's handling of money are very easy to come by.

    For my part, I'd infinitely rather be owing money to myself (in the way of going into my savings for anything unexpected), than to any other person, be they family, friend or foe.

    Perhaps it is that I know I have the self-discipline to put money back into my savings account ASAP, or maybe it is the way I was raised; my mother, for example, is almost 70 now, a pensioner back home with a regular enough job while she was working, and she has only once ever gone into the 'red' with anyone/anything in all her life (it was about a big purchase). Managing money well is like second nature to her.

    It doesn't stop at individual differences either, I'd say plenty of issues are cultural here (as already touched upon). (Also, I don't want to come across as horribly up myself as concerns this topic, so I have to say, as I grew up in a communist country, if there is anything to be said for that, is that people had to know how to budget to their last penny. There wasn't any surplus money lying around for anyone but those most astute at budgeting and scrimping and saving [not talking about the higher-echelons top-brass commie honchos of course! :)]. That's what I saw growing up, and that's the approach to money I assimilated and acquired, whether I'm earning or not, whether I'm able to save a few thousand a year or a mere couple of hundred.)

    (^^ Also, I have to say, it was all made easier by the fact that there were no consumer goods to speak of, to 'tempt' people. biggrin.png)

    Saving money is almost like my own personal law issued to myself; it has to be sustained in all but most destitute times.

    When I see something I want, I ask myself a few questions: "Do I really need this dress/those shoes/that cream?" The answer is NO in 90% of the cases. Sometimes I'm not happy with the answer, so I ask myself: "Can you afford this if you want it so badly?" The answer could well be YES, THIS IS ALLOWED at that point in time, so then I add on the caveat to myself that I will buy this item but I will abstain from buying anything else non-essential for the next few weeks, just to satisfy my inner balance-keeper.

    And so on.

    I know, I'm completely bonkers. :P But it works for me.


    A very insightful post. And I think it illustrates that poor budgeting/financial management are more to do with generational rather than gender specific habits. My parents didn't have half the disposable income that I have at the same age and were far more prudent on what they spent their money on. I remember when my mother first got a credit card, she just couldn't get her head around the idea of spending money you didn't have in your purse. It was a totally alien concept.

    I put about 200 euro a month into my credit union account each month. Sometimes I feel bad cause I proabably could save more but its better than nothing. As regards spending, I keep an excel spreadsheet and list off each paydate for the next year. Beside each date I itemise each large bill/treat, cost, etc so I can budget for it. This cuts out impulsive buying as I know what each paycheque is being spent on. If I do have a month where I have a splurge then that item is put in the spreadsheet and another item gets bumped down the list. It really makes you think about where and how you are spending your money.


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  • Registered Users Posts: 3,706 ✭✭✭seenitall


    Yes, I agree a spreadsheet (as already mentioned on thread, I think) is a really good idea for people who may find it challenging to stay on top of things.

    Edit: ... and a good idea generally, really. I'd just never thought of it before!


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