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Women and money
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Just because someone gets a loan it doesn't mean that they can't pay their way or are struggling
. What if it's the case that it's coming to the end of the month and one needs to take a loan for an unexpected trip to the doctor.
I work full time, good paid job and get paid monthly. On a rare occasion an unexpected expense might come up like a bill, medical expense at the end of the month, If I haven't got money in my account , rather then "struggling" I will get a lend and pay it back to who ever soon as I get paid. Doesn't mean that I can't pay my way or manage my finances.
There's this really cool new idea called savings! I've got this thing called a savings account, which I put money into every month. When I was earning a reasonable wage, I could put away 200-250 a month (no more, because living in London is very expensive) and now that I'm much poorer, I try to put away 20-50 a month if I can. If a medical expense or a bill comes up, what I do is I take the money out of my savings account! That way, I don't need to bother friends and family members who have their own financial issues and lives to worry about.
On a less sarcastic note, I'd say that saving for a 'rainy day' (which means that unexpected hospital stay or flight home for a funeral or electricity bill, as well as 'fun stuff') is surely one of the most basic parts of managing your finances. What on earth is an adult with a well-paid job doing borrowing money for things they should have budgeted for in the first place? If you're living paycheck to paycheck when you don't have to, you're not financially responsible. 0 -
There's this really cool new idea called savings! I've got this thing called a savings account, which I put money into every month. When I was earning a reasonable wage, I could put away 200-250 a month (no more, because living in London is very expensive) and now that I'm much poorer, I try to put away 20-50 a month if I can. If a medical expense or a bill comes up, what I do is I take the money out of my savings account! That way, I don't need to bother friends and family members who have their own financial issues and lives to worry about.
On a less sarcastic note, I'd say that saving for a 'rainy day' (which means that unexpected hospital stay or flight home for a funeral or electricity bill, as well as 'fun stuff') is surely one of the most basic parts of managing your finances. What on earth is an adult with a well-paid job doing borrowing money for things they should have budgeted for in the first place? If you're living paycheck to paycheck when you don't have to, you're not financially responsible.
Aren't you bloody marvelous. Good for you! I also do that cool idea and btw it's not new :cool:
From my first postI am in a what some would call a "good" paid job but even at times I may need to take a lend from a parent/ sibling to pay a bill etc. But It doesn't mean I don't save, and think about the future. I know if I dip into my savings I won't but the money back
so I think it's best to just borrow sometimes - providing it is a short term loan and it's not putting anyone out of pocket by much.
Everyone is different, and for ME - I prefer to take a lend from someone where I know I'd have to pay it back. Rather then dipping into savings where I most likely won't put the money back. I get a lend on a very rare occasion. I work out a budget each month for myself that I manage fine on, while saving a good chunk and living comfortably.
You don't know me or anythinng about my finanaces/what I pay on bills, what expenses I have, what I earn so don't judge on what I am responsible for and what I am not, when you have no clue about me!0 -
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I sort of had it beat into me as a kid that it's important to have a nest egg of savings at all times and I feel uneasy when I don't have at least three months' wages in my savings at all times.
But I think if you're in a position to, it's important to enjoy yourself too, and not be riddled with Catholic guilt every time you put your hand in your pocket and splash out on something you've worked hard to afford.
I work bloody hard, I've earned every cent that goes into my bank account and I'll be damned if I'm going to skip the nights out, the trips away, the blow-dries, the occasional shopping trips...to be completely prudent when I'll spend the rest of my life doing that anyway. I'm single, in my twenties and living abroad during what will probably be the most free and most fun years of my life. I'm lucky enough to have full time employment and few responsibilities, why shouldn't I enjoy it?
I don't think you can judge these things. Everyone has different priorities in life, their spending habits will reflect that. Mine isn't to settle down and buy a house any time soon; I've got a few more years of travel in me before I settle anywhere. I think the Irish obsession with home ownership is a bit outdated anyway, we should adjust our attitudes on that in accordance with the massive disaster we've just gone through.
My financial priorities are to pay my bills, rent, daily and weekly expenses, have enough to socialize and travel outside of that, and have enough savings to be fine if it all goes pear-shaped in the morning. I'm not interested in counting my pennies, but I've not been raised to not know its value either.
That's the thing, though, you can afford to do it on your own. No issues. I know people well into their thirties who try to have the lifestyle you describe (new shoes all the time, meals out, weekends away every few weeks) when they are earning a low salary. They then expect their parents to subsidise them. One 37-year-old at my old job asked her parents to pay almost 3 grand for her to do her teaching diploma. When I expressed surprise that she was still being supported by her parents at her age, she basically said it wasn't her fault she didn't have the money. I wanted to tell her that if she'd skipped the 2 trips to Majorca, the Louboutin shoes, the weekly manicures and waxing, she would have probably saved that money in under a year, but she wouldn't have understood. Some people really do have that sense of entitlement. Let the parents pay for the 'boring' stuff. That attitude drives me mad. 0 -
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It's not a case of just "dipping into my savings" though.
My money is saved into a Credit Union account, that isn't near my job and only opens Monday-Friday 9-5. So if I wanted to take money out of my savings to pay a bill etc it would involve taking a day off or half day from work - all for the sake of say for example €50 to cover a bill :rolleyes:
when my family/friends are kind, obliging and don't see any issue with helping a friend/sibling out with a lend for a couple of days until I get paid.
Just like the way if it was the other way around I'd happily help out.
Nothing to feel bad about, If you would feel bad about something simple like that well then that's just petty. That's my opinion :cool:
It's all a matter of perspective, a matter of individual inclinations, if you will.
So no-one is right or wrong, petty or unwise, for how they handle their finances, as long as their way works for them. IMO.
But the problem is, money is a very sensitive subject, as in our brain this subject is tied up with survival, so judgments on other people's handling of money are very easy to come by.
For my part, I'd infinitely rather be owing money to myself (in the way of going into my savings for anything unexpected), than to any other person, be they family, friend or foe.
Perhaps it is that I know I have the self-discipline to put money back into my savings account ASAP, or maybe it is the way I was raised; my mother, for example, is almost 70 now, a pensioner back home with a regular enough job while she was working, and she has only once ever gone into the 'red' with anyone/anything in all her life (it was about a big purchase). Managing money well is like second nature to her.
It doesn't stop at individual differences either, I'd say plenty of issues are cultural here (as already touched upon). (Also, I don't want to come across as horribly up myself as concerns this topic, so I have to say, as I grew up in a communist country, if there is anything to be said for that, is that people had to know how to budget to their last penny. There wasn't any surplus money lying around for anyone but those most astute at budgeting and scrimping and saving [not talking about the higher-echelons top-brass commie honchos of course!
]. That's what I saw growing up, and that's the approach to money I assimilated and acquired, whether I'm earning or not, whether I'm able to save a few thousand a year or a mere couple of hundred.)
(^^ Also, I have to say, it was all made easier by the fact that there were no consumer goods to speak of, to 'tempt' people.
)
Saving money is almost like my own personal law issued to myself; it has to be sustained in all but most destitute times.
When I see something I want, I ask myself a few questions: "Do I really need this dress/those shoes/that cream?" The answer is NO in 90% of the cases. Sometimes I'm not happy with the answer, so I ask myself: "Can you afford this if you want it so badly?" The answer could well be YES, THIS IS ALLOWED at that point in time, so then I add on the caveat to myself that I will buy this item but I will abstain from buying anything else non-essential for the next few weeks, just to satisfy my inner balance-keeper.
And so on.
I know, I'm completely bonkers. :P But it works for me.0 -
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It's all a matter of perspective, a matter of individual inclinations, if you will.
So no-one is right or wrong, petty or unwise, for how they handle their finances, as long as their way works for them. IMO.
But the problem is, money is a very sensitive subject, as in our brain this subject is tied up with survival, so judgments on other people's handling of money are very easy to come by.
For my part, I'd infinitely rather be owing money to myself (in the way of going into my savings for anything unexpected), than to any other person, be they family, friend or foe.
Perhaps it is that I know I have the self-discipline to put money back into my savings account ASAP, or maybe it is the way I was raised; my mother, for example, is almost 70 now, a pensioner back home with a regular enough job while she was working, and she has only once ever gone into the 'red' with anyone/anything in all her life (it was about a big purchase). Managing money well is like second nature to her.
It doesn't stop at individual differences either, I'd say plenty of issues are cultural here (as already touched upon). (Also, I don't want to come across as horribly up myself as concerns this topic, so I have to say, as I grew up in a communist country, if there is anything to be said for that, is that people had to know how to budget to their last penny. There wasn't any surplus money lying around for anyone but those most astute at budgeting and scrimping and saving [not talking about the higher-echelons top-brass commie honchos of course!]. That's what I saw growing up, and that's the approach to money I assimilated and acquired, whether I'm earning or not, whether I'm able to save a few thousand a year or a mere couple of hundred.)
(^^ Also, I have to say, it was all made easier by the fact that there were no consumer goods to speak of, to 'tempt' people.)
Saving money is almost like my own personal law issued to myself; it has to be sustained in all but most destitute times.
When I see something I want, I ask myself a few questions: "Do I really need this dress/those shoes/that cream?" The answer is NO in 90% of the cases. Sometimes I'm not happy with the answer, so I ask myself: "Can you afford this if you want it so badly?" The answer could well be YES, THIS IS ALLOWED at that point in time, so then I add on the caveat to myself that I will buy this item but I will abstain from buying anything else non-essential for the next few weeks, just to satisfy my inner balance-keeper.
And so on.
I know, I'm completely bonkers. :P But it works for me.
A very insightful post. And I think it illustrates that poor budgeting/financial management are more to do with generational rather than gender specific habits. My parents didn't have half the disposable income that I have at the same age and were far more prudent on what they spent their money on. I remember when my mother first got a credit card, she just couldn't get her head around the idea of spending money you didn't have in your purse. It was a totally alien concept.
I put about 200 euro a month into my credit union account each month. Sometimes I feel bad cause I proabably could save more but its better than nothing. As regards spending, I keep an excel spreadsheet and list off each paydate for the next year. Beside each date I itemise each large bill/treat, cost, etc so I can budget for it. This cuts out impulsive buying as I know what each paycheque is being spent on. If I do have a month where I have a splurge then that item is put in the spreadsheet and another item gets bumped down the list. It really makes you think about where and how you are spending your money.0 -
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