Why doesn't the superglue stick to the tube? Life's little mysteries...

admiralofthefleet

how do people get enjoyment out of the x factor

Capt'n Midnight

vektarman wrote: »

Why did Japanese kamikaze pilots wear helmets?

to keep their ears warm

TheUsual

Capt'n Midnight wrote: »

to keep their ears warm

Nah mate. Health and Safety gone mad, end of the Japanese Empire it was too.

Jev/N

JonathanAnon wrote: »

it's justifiable when you scrore a really good goal though..

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7nPrSjrUnpg

Good man Robber Robbie

I thought this was demonstrating a blowjob

EoghanIRL

If money doesn't grow on trees then why do banks have branches?

johndaman66

Why do your workmates ask do you have 2 seconds to spare and then keep you for at least 5 mins...possibly 15.

Why do people say a particular car part is about €20 to buy in the motor factors. When you go to the motor factors it always ends up costing something more like €48

Johro

bluewolf wrote: »

It reacts to oxygen

YES!

Duh...

holystungun9

where does the colour of my food go? I eat lots of different coloured stuff, green peppers, red peppers, bananas, cabbage, eggs, radishes, potatoes, etc. Surely I should be pooing and peeing rainbows.

guppy

holystungun9 wrote: »

where does the colour of my food go? I eat lots of different coloured stuff, green peppers, red peppers, bananas, cabbage, eggs, radishes, potatoes, etc. Surely I should be pooing and peeing rainbows.

You know how if you get lots of different colours of play-doh and roll them all together it goes brown? Same thing.

The One Who Knocks

Omackeral wrote: »

How do the 'Keep Off The Grass' signs get there?

Like This!

Duh..

The One Who Knocks

guppy wrote: »

You know how if you get lots of different colours of play-doh and roll them all together it goes brown? Same thing.

Priceless!

Twee.

FairytaleGirl wrote: »

What do you call a male ballerina?

Danseur, or just ballet dancer.

AdolfHipster

zega wrote: »

The eagles said they wouldn't carry a thing of pure evil(the ring)

Not my own >
I think everyone knows the eagle 'plot hole' in The Lord of the Rings. Why didn't they get the eagles to fly the ring to Mount Doom? My theory is that Gandalf had planned on doing exactly that.
I'll explain chronologically.
Gandalf goes to Saruman looking for help after learning Frodos ring is the One Ring, they need to come up with a plan for destroying it. But Saruman reveals that he's working with Sauron and imprisons Gandalf for not joining him. Gandalf needs to escape and he also now knows he has to come up with a plan for destroying the ring by himself. When he thinks to get the eagles to help him escape it sparks the ideas that he could also have them help get the ring to Mordor. After all, he's not an idiot.
When he escapes on the eagle he doesn't go directly to Rivendell to meet the hobbits, he first goes to meet the eagles where the eagles live which we know from The Hobbit is in the northern parts of the Misty Mountains, on the eastern slopes. Roughly here.
Gandalf and the eagles discus the plan for the eagles to take Frodo and the ring to Mordor and the eagles agree to do it, even though it could be dangerous for them because of the nine dragons the Nazgûl ride - the only things in Saurons defences that could stand in the eagles way. But they would have the element of surprise and much greater numbers if they did end up having to fight the dragons.
They see that their ability to fly is the only advantage Saurons enemies have against him and that this plan is the only plan that has any reasonable chance of success. Gandalf and the eagles agree that the plan should be kept very secret. If Sauron hears about it he'll realise the one weakness in his defences and quickly try to protect himself against it, and there goes the one advantage his enemies have.
Gandalf can't risk losing this advantage so he tells no one when he arrives at Rivendell. Nobody can know the plan until they reach the eagles and are flying on their way to Mordor because if they're captured they could have the plan tortured out of them - in the same way Gollum had the location of the ring tortured out of him. When they leave Rivendell they're a group of nine, not a just Frodo, Sam and himself like he'd planned for. But that's fine, he thinks, there are plenty of eagles to carry them.
Gandalf just has to get the fellowship to the other side of the Misty Mountains and go north to meet the eagles where they live, because meeting them anywhere else would mean a greater risk of being seen by the enemy. He can't take any chances of the his plan being discovered in any way and is being extremely careful because as far as he knows the survival of Middle Earth rests on the secrecy and success of his plan.
There are four main routes across the Misty Mountains, they're marked on this map. From north to south:

• High pass
• Redhorn pass
• Moria
• The Gap of Rohan

Being closest to the eagles the High pass would have been ideal for Gandalfs plan, but he decided against it because it was the obvious route for crossing the mountains (for whatever plan they might have) so Saruman was watching it. It was also infested with goblins and orcs who could see them travelling north after the pass, inform Sauron or Saruman who might then realise they were going north to meet the eagles thus discovering the plan.
The next most northern pass is what Gandalf settled for, even though it's a very dangerous pass and even though it would mean a long journey north to meet the eagles, it is still the safest route for his plan to remain secret and that is all that's important to him now. Keeping his plan secret was the main reason for him choosing the Redhorn pass. But Saruman was watching here too and sent storms to stop them.
The Gap of Rohan would take them far too close to Isengard, and more importantly too far south. Which was no good for the plan as they'd have to travel the whole length of the Misty Mountains up the eastern side to meet the eagles. So the Gap wasn't an option for Gandalf and the only way left was Moria. Which he didn't like at all and we see he's very reluctant. We think it's only because of the Balrog but it's also because of the risk of goblins and orcs seeing them go north on the eastern side (like the High pass) and because it was further south than he'd planned for which meant it would take longer to reach the eagles.
They almost get through Moria but Gandalf ends up fighting the Balrog and falling down the chasm. When he's about to fall he realises he has to tell them the eagle plan quickly before he falls, and in a way that any nearby orcs and golbins won't understand. He says ''Fly, you fools'' hoping at least one of the fellowship understands what he really means... but they don't. He falls and fights the Balrog. Meanwhile the fellowship escapes Moria and carries on with the only plan they've known - get the ring to Mordor.
Gandalf the Grey dies in the battle against the Balrog, but he comes back later as Gandalf the White. When he comes back he has forgotten a lot of things about his previous life. Even his own name, until he's reminded of it when Aragorn calls him Gandalf. And he even forgot his plan to meet the eagles.
At the end when he needs to get Frodo and Sam away from the erupting Mount Doom he knows only one way to do it - calling the eagles to fly them out of there. This is when he remembers the plan, calling the eagles reminds him of it in the same way Aragorn calling him Gandalf reminded him of his name. But by this time the ring is destroyed and the plan is redundant.

Bravo_Zulu

What would happen if you hired two private investigators to follow each other? Not privy to the information that one is following the other and visa versa of course.

Shryke

@AdolfHipster You're rekindling the LotR nerd within me. Great post, whoever made it. Cheers for sharing. It could very well be spot on too.

The One Who Knocks

Why do websites like this one exist?

newmug

Anyone wrote: »

The blue whale

Why are sperm whales called sperm whales???

fasttalkerchat

The world is £4 trillion in debt.

Just exactly which planet do we owe it to?

JustAThought

What exactly would have happe.ed if we'd let Anglo go to the wall.

And why didnt we?

not yet

Why the fcuk do I let the cost plus sofa's or beds etc ads annoy me to the point of a mild stroke.

newmug

JustAThought wrote: »

What exactly would have happe.ed if we'd let Anglo go to the wall.

The banking system would have collapsed. Peoples savings in Anglo would have been obliterated trying to plug the hole that the taxpayer is now plugging gradually. Then other banks would start falling one by one from a combination of people withdrawing their savings in panic to store it under the matress, and creditors demanding the banks pay back what they owe them immediately. We would wake up one morning and it would be like a scene from 28 days later. Back to trading in cigarettes again.

JustAThought wrote: »

And why didnt we?

So the above wouldn't happen.

Green Mile

Why do we make a weird noise when we hear/see something funny? The thing we call laugh. Why do we make the sounds at all?

Also, why do we move when there’s music? The thing we call dance?

Does it come from a previous trait in our evolution?

MrCreosote

newmug wrote: »

The banking system would have collapsed. Peoples savings in Anglo would have been obliterated trying to plug the hole that the taxpayer is now plugging gradually. Then other banks would start falling one by one from a combination of people withdrawing their savings in panic to store it under the matress, and creditors demanding the banks pay back what they owe them immediately. We would wake up one morning and it would be like a scene from 28 days later. Back to trading in cigarettes again.



So the above wouldn't happen.

Just like what happened in Iceland then.

2ndcoming

Why do Manchester City have 3 stars above their crest?

mitosis

Why was Jesus' family poor when they were given gold and other precious goods at his birth?

sheesh

mitosis wrote: »

Why was Jesus' family poor when they were given gold and other precious goods at his birth?

I don't think it says in the bible he was poor.

his father had a trade I don't think he was poor just not rich.


Alternative reason: you think its cheap bringing up the son of God?

They used it to pay for Josephs Silence.

sheesh

newmug wrote: »

Why are sperm whales called sperm whales???

their big bulging heads are full of spermacetti oil which they use to change their bouyancy

Duggy747

Utterly pointless but if you point a remote control like a TV's one at you and press a button while looking at the IR receiver on it, you won't see anything.

But, if you do it through, say, the camera on your phone you'll see the IR receiver flash.

Outrageous!! :pac:

BrensBenz

Also,

• Why doesn't rain hurt? It falls from thousands of feet; on its way down, it forms itself into the perfect aerodynamic shape so, by the time it hits your head, it's going like the clappers. It has mass / weight and velocity / acceleration but, when struck by millions of the bu&&ers, we only feel wet. Hail can be uncomfortable so why not rain?
• Also, why does everybody moan about their allocation of good looks, money, etc. but think their share of common sense is perfect? Even those who WE know are as thick as bricks, think they have optimum common sense.
• Same question for sense of humour, fashion sense, etc.
• Why do we claim to like all sorts of music when we actually only like a few similar bands from a very narrow period?
• Why is the majority always vast?
• Why are Jeremy Kyle's DNA and lie detector results always "all important"?
• Why do 21st century PCs still depend on Ctrl Alt Delete to start?
• Why do I have to wait ages, at MY expense, listening to "your call is important to us"?
• Why, in this digital age, do people still hope the photo "will come out"?
• Why are weather forecasts on RTE delivered by meteorologists who have no training or talent for public speaking?
• Who at RTE changed Gardai to Gorthee?
• Where is Southern Ireland or, in BBC-speak, Southern Awland?
• Why is it AfghAnistAWn?
• OP, why did you get me started on this?

--Kaiser--

AdolfHipster wrote: »

Not my own >
I think everyone knows the eagle 'plot hole' in The Lord of the Rings. Why didn't they get the eagles to fly the ring to Mount Doom? My theory is that Gandalf had planned on doing exactly that.
I'll explain chronologically.
Gandalf goes to Saruman looking for help after learning Frodos ring is the One Ring, they need to come up with a plan for destroying it. But Saruman reveals that he's working with Sauron and imprisons Gandalf for not joining him. Gandalf needs to escape and he also now knows he has to come up with a plan for destroying the ring by himself. When he thinks to get the eagles to help him escape it sparks the ideas that he could also have them help get the ring to Mordor. After all, he's not an idiot.
When he escapes on the eagle he doesn't go directly to Rivendell to meet the hobbits, he first goes to meet the eagles where the eagles live which we know from The Hobbit is in the northern parts of the Misty Mountains, on the eastern slopes. Roughly here.
Gandalf and the eagles discus the plan for the eagles to take Frodo and the ring to Mordor and the eagles agree to do it, even though it could be dangerous for them because of the nine dragons the Nazgûl ride - the only things in Saurons defences that could stand in the eagles way. But they would have the element of surprise and much greater numbers if they did end up having to fight the dragons.
They see that their ability to fly is the only advantage Saurons enemies have against him and that this plan is the only plan that has any reasonable chance of success. Gandalf and the eagles agree that the plan should be kept very secret. If Sauron hears about it he'll realise the one weakness in his defences and quickly try to protect himself against it, and there goes the one advantage his enemies have.
Gandalf can't risk losing this advantage so he tells no one when he arrives at Rivendell. Nobody can know the plan until they reach the eagles and are flying on their way to Mordor because if they're captured they could have the plan tortured out of them - in the same way Gollum had the location of the ring tortured out of him. When they leave Rivendell they're a group of nine, not a just Frodo, Sam and himself like he'd planned for. But that's fine, he thinks, there are plenty of eagles to carry them.
Gandalf just has to get the fellowship to the other side of the Misty Mountains and go north to meet the eagles where they live, because meeting them anywhere else would mean a greater risk of being seen by the enemy. He can't take any chances of the his plan being discovered in any way and is being extremely careful because as far as he knows the survival of Middle Earth rests on the secrecy and success of his plan.
There are four main routes across the Misty Mountains, they're marked on this map. From north to south:

• High pass
• Redhorn pass
• Moria
• The Gap of Rohan

Being closest to the eagles the High pass would have been ideal for Gandalfs plan, but he decided against it because it was the obvious route for crossing the mountains (for whatever plan they might have) so Saruman was watching it. It was also infested with goblins and orcs who could see them travelling north after the pass, inform Sauron or Saruman who might then realise they were going north to meet the eagles thus discovering the plan.
The next most northern pass is what Gandalf settled for, even though it's a very dangerous pass and even though it would mean a long journey north to meet the eagles, it is still the safest route for his plan to remain secret and that is all that's important to him now. Keeping his plan secret was the main reason for him choosing the Redhorn pass. But Saruman was watching here too and sent storms to stop them.
The Gap of Rohan would take them far too close to Isengard, and more importantly too far south. Which was no good for the plan as they'd have to travel the whole length of the Misty Mountains up the eastern side to meet the eagles. So the Gap wasn't an option for Gandalf and the only way left was Moria. Which he didn't like at all and we see he's very reluctant. We think it's only because of the Balrog but it's also because of the risk of goblins and orcs seeing them go north on the eastern side (like the High pass) and because it was further south than he'd planned for which meant it would take longer to reach the eagles.
They almost get through Moria but Gandalf ends up fighting the Balrog and falling down the chasm. When he's about to fall he realises he has to tell them the eagle plan quickly before he falls, and in a way that any nearby orcs and golbins won't understand. He says ''Fly, you fools'' hoping at least one of the fellowship understands what he really means... but they don't. He falls and fights the Balrog. Meanwhile the fellowship escapes Moria and carries on with the only plan they've known - get the ring to Mordor.
Gandalf the Grey dies in the battle against the Balrog, but he comes back later as Gandalf the White. When he comes back he has forgotten a lot of things about his previous life. Even his own name, until he's reminded of it when Aragorn calls him Gandalf. And he even forgot his plan to meet the eagles.
At the end when he needs to get Frodo and Sam away from the erupting Mount Doom he knows only one way to do it - calling the eagles to fly them out of there. This is when he remembers the plan, calling the eagles reminds him of it in the same way Aragorn calling him Gandalf reminded him of his name. But by this time the ring is destroyed and the plan is redundant.

When I read this I thought, here's a massive Tolkien nerd....then I saw you refer to the flying steeds of the Nazgul as dragons...they were never described as such and definitely were not dragons. I'm not certain if there were any dragons left Middle-Earth at that point (Smaug being the 'last great dragon')