What's your best piece of (romantic) relationship advice?

Ellsbells

I definitely think mine is not to run after someone who has finished with you. From my experience, it never ends well.

What have you learned good and bad about relationships?

keng66

Stay away from women with big hands- they make your dick look small

Rosy Posy

You can't change people- either accept them as they are or move on.

Just because you win every argument doesn't mean you're always right, or that you've changed their mind.

syklops

Try and find one hobby you can do together that you both enjoy.

jaja321

Pick your battles and learn to let the other stuff go.

xDramaxQueenx

Dont get attached.

eviltwin

Fight for a relationship worth keeping but always know the point its better to walk away

Never compromise yourself or your values for your partner, always seek advice from people you trust and remember there is no such thing as the "perfect" partner or relationship

Wibbs

keng66 if you want to post in this forum please read the charter and get a feel of the place before hitting "submit reply". FYI your last post is NOT of the standard expected around here. Thank you.

Princess Peach

Don't have a "type". Just cause a guy isn't your ideal type or what you normally go for doesn't mean it can't be amazing.

The Big Red Button

Don't hold grudges. Life is simply too short for that!!

Chazz Michael Michaels

If your friends advise you to avoid someone, there is probably a good reason why. Trust their judgement, they don't have rose-tinted glasses on.

leonidas83

If your gonna bang someone outside of the relationship make sure ya wrap up big time

deelite

Remember there is a reason why they are your EX - don't just remember the good things....

krudler

Time apart can be as important as time together. don't stop going out with friends or doing stuff just because you're in a relationship.

Go on dates, just because you're in a relationship spending time together shouldn't equate to just being slouched on the couch watching tv every night. Go for drinks, days out, hell even a drive to nowhere for a chat, time together and quality time together are two different things. Be spontaneous and remember that being with someone is meant to be fun.

Honey-ec

Never go to sleep on a fight.

Jerrica

Love your own company. If you can't do that how can anyone else?

cantdecide

Don't get lazy.

cassiedoll

i know this might sound corny, but my bf isnt big on the slow dancing, will act the eejit dancing when he's drunk so when we are at home, i move the table out of the way and we dance to one of our songs. I can tell he thinks its cheesy but he does it for me.

To me, it's the little things that i find romance in, coming home in freezing cold after a day in work and ur pj's are on the rad and ur dinner is ready.

So i don't think it has to be an amazing, out of this world gesture.

byronbay2

The best piece of advice I ever received about marriage is the following:
"Men marry women hoping that they won't change but they do.
Women marry men hoping that they will change but they don't."
This doesn't mean that I am bitter and cynical about relationships (quite the contrary) but people need to enter them with their eyes open. Ladies, if you think you can turn your man into your idea of the perfect partner you are mistaken - either he is that way naturally or it will never happen!

gara

Communication is key -talk honestly and listen carefully

miamee

Not my own personal advice but this letter from Noel Coward to Marlene Dietrich is full of relationship advice that I would definitely give the thumbs up to!

From the Letters of Note website.

Bubblefett

My favourte piece of advice came from Captain Corelli's Mandolin by Louis de Bernières.

“Love is a temporary madness. It erupts like an earthquake and then subsides. And when it subsides you have to make a decision. You have to work out whether your roots have become so entwined together that it is inconceivable that you should ever part. Because this is what love is. Love is not breathlessness, it is not excitement, it is not the promulgation of promises of eternal passion, it is not the desire to mate every second minute of the day, it is not lying awake at night imagining that he is kissing every cranny of your body. No, don't blush, I am telling you some truths. That is just being "in love" which any fool can do. Love itself is what is left over when being in love has burned away, and this is both an art and a fortunate accident. Your mother and I had it, we had roots that grew towards each other underground, and when all the pretty blossom had fallen from our branches we found that we were one tree and not two.”

ArtyC

Dont bitch about your partner to other people- majority of the time it's nothing but a tiff but you're friends will only think the worst of your other half- because sure that's all they know from you- causes heartache in the long run when you want to hang with your friends and your partner

Ilyana

Always defend your partner if someone speaks ill of them, but don't dismiss a friend's concern either.

Don't compromise your own hobbies and interests. It'll lead to loneliness when he's not there, and resentfulness when he wants to do things without you.

And +1 on Bubblefett's post.

Neyite

Honey-ec wrote: »

Never go to sleep on a fight.

I agree with this, but would add the caveat: sometimes it may suit better to park an issue and revisit it when emotions are less heated - i dont mean to ignore each other and go to bed angry, but to agree to put it aside and talk about it when the dust has settled.

It works with me very much because I sometimes need to calm down and regroup my thoughts, and once I have slept on an issue, it usually is never as bad as I initially imagined, and I may have came to a compromise or solution.

My relationship advise snippets:

*Never demand as a right what you can ask as a favour*
Assumptions and implied behaviour are the death of a relationship. No point in getting thick over him not taking the bins out if he never knew you assume it to be his job in the first place. Asking someone to do something is respectful and you should never be disrespectful to the person you love the most.

*the best revenge is your own happiness*
If someone has broken your heart, or treated you badly, the best way you can get your own back at them is to be truly happy. Nothing better than bumping into the ex when you love your life despite their best efforts.

*The best relationship is the one you would walk away from if you had to*
This is one I think I heard here on Boards. This is about self respect. If you respect yourself to walk away when someone, no matter how much you adore them, does something unforgivable then you will be treated with respect. Its a healthier relationship.

*Forever does not exist, relationships are on loan*
Even successful couples reach a time in their life where they part ways. It may be after 60 years of bliss and one dies, it might be after a year or a few years and you move onto other relationships. Point is always remember its a loan for a while.

IvyTheTerrible

Don't assume your partner is psychic and sit there seething when he or she doesn't realise what you are annoyed about or want them to do.

Communication is the most important thing, IMO.

LeeHoffmann

Only be with somebody who treats you with love and respect, and who makes your life better.

Never take your partner for granted.

When you fight, fight fair. Always try to see things from your partner´s perspective, and always try to see the best in them.

sam34

do not put up with a partner who is jealous, possessive and tries to isolate you from your friends/family. they will not change, no matter how often they promise they will

NegativeCreep

I would say, don't say "I love you" too quickly. People feel like they have to say it for some reason. I've had it said to me a few times a few weeks into a relationship and it kills things if you don't feel the same way.
Also, don't feel obliged to text them constantly. It's suffocating and scares me off

sambuka41

If you are having problems don't sit with everyone of your friends looking for their opinions, TALK to your partner. I still (in my 30's) have friends who try to dissect their partners behaviour "what do you think he mean't when he said this" or "he didn't call for 2 days, what do you think that means" That is DEATH to a relationship, pointless self doubting.

Like others have said involving friends in your relationship woes is not fair, it usually is the friend who suffers when all is said and done.

Novella

If you're with somebody and you think they're treating you in a way you don't deserve, you are probably right. It's okay to stand up for yourself and walk away.