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HeartBreak.What/Who were your comforts to get you through

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    #32
    ArtyC
    Registered Users Posts: 1,504 ✭✭✭ArtyC


    Baileys amd brandy poured over icecream-Ben and jerrys


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    #33
    AnnyHallsal
    Registered Users Posts: 4,117 ✭✭✭AnnyHallsal


    I'd also add Boards itself. For some reason reading PI threads can have a therapeutic effect. Maybe because you see other people going through similar, and much worse.


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    #34
    supermouse
    Registered Users Posts: 793 ✭✭✭supermouse


    I would never wish heartbreak on my worst enemy. It's one of the worst experiences to go through and as some posters have said, you never completely get over it, the pain just dulls.

    I spent 5 months being a fool, drinking to oblivion, crying myself to sleep, wailing to anyone that would listen, hooking up with boys years younger than me. looking back now I was definitely on the path to self destruct.

    I cut contact with him 3 months after our breakup and it sped things up a bit. A couple of months later I was starting to feel normal again. However, looking back on it now, I can honestly see a period of about 18 months immediately afterwards the break up that I was anything but myself. I believe my actions directly after the break up led to more destruction than the actual breakup itself.

    If I ever go through anything similar again my first port of call will be a councillor. I discovered a lot of thing about myself since that time, and one of those most valuable lessons is that in times of stress, I need to talk to someone.

    Oh, now in answer to your OP (sorry for getting sidetracked!) exercise, friends, travel and chocolate :)


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    #35
    Wompa1
    Registered Users Posts: 8,170 ✭✭✭Wompa1


    Threw myself into work and became a bit of a prick. Going to have to work on the latter


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    #36
    dave3004
    Registered Users Posts: 621 ✭✭✭dave3004


    Im "once bitten twice shy".

    Was heartbroken once and will never let myself be that vulnerable again.


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    #37
    Napper Hawkins
    Registered Users Posts: 1,903 ✭✭✭Napper Hawkins


    I became an obnoxious, weird, aggressive, drunk, self hating asshole and was on a dangerous slippery slope of self destruction that I will never forget for as long as I live.

    Worst experience of my life so far? Definitely. But I learned so much from it that I'll never allow myself to lose the plot like that again.

    My deepest sympathy for anyone going through this ****e.
    You'll get better eventually.


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    #38
    Ilyana
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,931 ✭✭✭Ilyana


    Eve_Dublin wrote: »
    What I actually did is not what I would advise (drinking too much, bottling it all up and talking to nobody about it, sitting in listening to horrifically sad music, not eating and losing a shed load of weight, playing back a voice message on phone repeatedly, reading old emails from them, keeping in contact with them) but I'm ready for it now if it happens again.

    That's the way I went when my ex and I broke up the first time. I was an absolute wreck - and I broke up with him! We got back together, it didn't work and now I have to readjust to life before I met him.

    The hardest thing for me is disentangling his life from mine. After nearly three years, everything reminds me of him. Right now, seeing a counsellor (for other things also), Ben & Jerry's, and having some new hobbies lined up will be how I cope with it.

    As for drowning one's sorrows, it seems like a good idea at the time. Not such a good idea when you're wailing down the phone to your ex at 5am, drunk as a skunk on cheap vino.


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    #39
    Eve_Dublin
    Closed Accounts Posts: 8,884 ✭✭✭Eve_Dublin


    Ilyana wrote: »
    As for drowning one's sorrows, it seems like a good idea at the time. Not such a good idea when you're wailing down the phone to your ex at 5am, drunk as a skunk on cheap vino.

    Argh the memories!! They buuuurn! Funny how I can laugh now at those drunken, pathetic phone calls from parties where I should've been enjoying myself. Never thought it'd get to a stage where I could laugh at my behaviour.


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    #40
    Ilyana
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,931 ✭✭✭Ilyana


    Eve_Dublin wrote: »
    Ilyana wrote: »
    As for drowning one's sorrows, it seems like a good idea at the time. Not such a good idea when you're wailing down the phone to your ex at 5am, drunk as a skunk on cheap vino.

    Argh the memories!! They buuuurn! Funny how I can laugh now at those drunken, pathetic phone calls from parties where I should've been enjoying myself. Never thought it'd get to a stage where I could laugh at my behaviour.

    That phone call usually follows a horrible kiss with some creep, and you're despairing that your ex was the only decent, good looking man in the world!

    In general, I think it's important to eventually find a balance between remembering someone fondly, but not pining for them.

    And maybe not listening to 'your song' for a couple of months!


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    #41
    thequieterone
    Registered Users Posts: 13 ✭thequieterone


    my best friend was there when i wanted. she gave out stink about him while i spent time defending him (like a fool!)
    i had few nights out letting off steam , let my best (guy) friend tell me what a plonker he was and assure me he wasnt good enough for me.
    Ate loads, luckily xmas happened so i had an excuse.
    Talked loads and loads and loads.
    Keep yourself distracted as much as you can.. anytime u find yourself alone you'll just think about it. so get out and do something with anyone.


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    #42
    Augmerson
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 6,162 ✭✭✭Augmerson


    Ben & Jerry's Cookie Dough and my sisters. Don't know where I'd be without them!


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    #43
    Honey-ec
    Closed Accounts Posts: 5,844 ✭✭✭Honey-ec


    Ilyana wrote: »
    As for drowning one's sorrows, it seems like a good idea at the time. Not such a good idea when you're wailing down the phone to your ex at 5am, drunk as a skunk on cheap vino.

    Thankfully I never did that. I wouldn't give the prick the satisfaction.


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    #44
    Ellsbells
    Closed Accounts Posts: 985 ✭✭✭Ellsbells


    Honey-ec wrote: »
    Thankfully I never did that. I wouldn't give the prick the satisfaction.

    Yeah I am the same as you. I would never chase someone who finished it. If they managed to say the words it over, begging isnt going to fix what was wrong.


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    #45
    kylith
    Registered Users Posts: 17,736 ✭✭✭✭kylith


    My dogs. They cuddle up when I'm upset, and as far as they're concerned I'm always right.


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    #46
    Augmerson
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 6,162 ✭✭✭Augmerson


    Honey-ec wrote: »
    Thankfully I never did that. I wouldn't give the prick the satisfaction.

    Easier said than done unfortunately. For some of us, it's hard to let go, especially if you've been with someone a long time and have a lot of genuine feelings for them. It depends on the circumstances. If it's anything like "I met someone else/cheated" along those lines then whoever it is can **** 100% off. Now that I'm 28 and a bit more mature though, if someone broke it off, I'd just say OK and try and move on, as they obviously (or should have) put some thought into their decision...but I am getting off topic!


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