Would you date a man who's had plastic surgery?

smash

A few posting in AH got my thinking about this. Would a woman date a man who's had some plastic surgery to enhance his body?

It seems perfectly normal and acceptable for women to get lip jobs, tummy tucks, boob jobs etc. so how would you feel if you met someone and found out he'd had something done like pec implants or a penis enlargement?

Susie_Q

smash wrote: »

It seems perfectly normal and acceptable for women to get lip jobs, tummy tucks, boob jobs etc.

I wouldn't agree with this assessment. I wouldn't think it was 'perfectly normal' if my sister told me she wanted a boob job or a facelift. In fact it's so far from perfectly normal that I don't know any women who've had plastic surgery.

Also, it's "pecs" as in "pectoral".

smash

Susie_Q wrote: »

I wouldn't agree with this assessment. I wouldn't think it was 'perfectly normal' if my sister told me she wanted a boob job or a facelift. In fact it's so far from perfectly normal that I don't know any women who've had plastic surgery.

I know a good few women who've got implants now. there's no fuss or taboo about it.

Susie_Q wrote: »

Also, it's "pecs" as in "pectoral".

I was wondering what way to spell it

It would be the reason why someone got plastic surgery that would affect my decision whether to go out with them or not. Some people might have some part of their body which is uncomfortable so therefore they could get plastic surgery...like a breast reduction for example.

If someone had body issues, as in self esteem issues, and got loads of surgery done then...no.

I actually got plastic surgery when I was 9. My earlobe slit in half because my brother pulled an earring out of it (we were only playing!) and I had to get skin taken off my thigh and put on my ear...hardcore! Something like this -> http://www.prplastic.com/New_Folder/photogallery/split-earlobe-1a.jpg

jenizzle

Depends on the reasoning tbh.

For example, if he had lost a ton of weight, and had some excess skin to get rid of in order for him to finally be happy, then that would be great as he would've done everything physically possible to help himself first. Like Lia Lia said, if it was constant, and because of self-esteem issues, I wouldn't be so sure.

smash

jenizzle wrote: »

Like Lia Lia said, if it was constant, and because of self-esteem issues, I wouldn't be so sure.

Examples I gave were pec implants or a penis enlargement. No doubt these would be because of self-esteem issues, in the same way that a lot of women get implants purely because they just want bigger boobs.

Dolbert

smash wrote: »

Examples I gave were pec implants or a penis enlargement. No doubt these would be because of self-esteem issues, in the same way that a lot of women get implants purely because they just want bigger boobs.

Honestly, it would be a total turn-off for me.

smash

Dolorous wrote: »

Honestly, it would be a total turn-off for me.

I guess this was my reason for bringing it up, I had a feeling this would be the popular answer and I'm wondering why it's the case but women are rarely questioned when they get it done.

Dolbert

smash wrote: »

I guess this was my reason for bringing it up, I had a feeling this would be the popular answer and I'm wondering why it's the case but women are rarely questioned when they get it done.

I'm probably the wrong person to ask as I find breast implants equally ridiculous (no offence to anyone who has them). I think there'd be plenty of men out there who'd be put off by fake boobs tbh.

smash

Dolorous wrote: »

I'm probably the wrong person to ask as I find breast implants equally ridiculous (no offence to anyone who has them). I think there'd be plenty of men out there who'd be put off by fake boobs tbh.

Well there's a few things to it. If a woman's breast distort say after childbirth, then getting implants to put them back to how they were previously is not a big deal. And depending on above or below the muscle and if silicone of saline, you'd never know. And she'd be happy.

Then there's those who get them just because they want bigger boobs. But say if a man had a small penis, would cosmetic surgery big that much or a big deal? After all, it would no doubt help his sex life and self confidence.

All this was brought on by a silly post in AH about women's bits after childbirth which was followed up by a comment about how it's always the woman and never the man's inadequate penis size.

Dolbert

As far as I know penile enhancement only makes a difference to how it looks flaccid but doesn't increase it's size when erect (good lord I sound like a spambot)

smash

Dolorous wrote: »

As far as I know penile enhancement only makes a difference to how it looks flaccid but doesn't increase it's size when erect (good lord I sound like a spambot)

No you can get a gel implant to increase width and apparently over time it can increase length, but only marginally, because of the weight.

Ickle Magoo

I think it's all based on personal taste so starting off with the assumption there is an inherent double-standard and waiting for posters to indulge confirmation bias is a bit silly...unless you have means to poll absolutely everyone on their specific tastes regarding whatever gender they are attracted to then there is no way to make the assumption that "women" think X while "men" think Y.

That "some" men have no issue with "some" women who have plastic surgery really has no bearing on whether "some" women have an issue with "some" men who have plastic surgery. Logic dictates that it goes both ways for both genders.

For me, merely the fact they've had plastic surgery would be irrelevant - after all there could be some medical reason that necessitates surgical intervention. Really, it would be how attractive I found the person as a whole (and surgery may well affect that), what impact that surgery would potentially have on our relationship and whatever psychological reasons were behind the surgery which might also impact on our relationship.

Relationships are based on conditional affection and like it not, peoples appearances, the levels they are prepared to go in order to create/recreate their appearances, etc, etc all combine along with a bazillion other things to affect how attractive one person can find another - and that along with all the other personal tastes out there is obviously going to vary from person to person.

Dolbert

^Ickle put it better than I could I guess I'd find it off-putting as I'm pretty much against most cosmetic surgery anyway, but if single me really hit it off with a guy and it turned out he'd had something done, then who knows?

smash

Ickle Magoo wrote: »

I think it's all based on personal taste so starting off with the assumption there is an inherent double-standard and waiting for posters to indulge confirmation bias is a bit silly...

I never did that. I said there's acceptance that women will get these surgeries and people aren't bothered, but you never hear of men getting them, and the question was if a man did, would a woman still date him.

Ickle Magoo wrote: »

That "some" men have no issue with "some" women who have plastic surgery really has no bearing on whether "some" women have an issue with "some" men who have plastic surgery.

Wasn't that the question I asked?

Ickle Magoo wrote: »

For me, merely the fact they've had plastic surgery would be irrelevant - after all there could be some medical reason that necessitates surgical intervention.

But what I've talked about since the op was elective surgery.

Ickle Magoo

smash wrote: »

I never did that. I said there's acceptance that women will get these surgeries and people aren't bothered, but you never hear of men getting them, and the question was if a man did, would a woman still date him.

Whose acceptance? "Never hear of men getting them"? Do you have sources that back up these claims? What you are asking is would "a woman" date "a man" given whatever hypothetical situation you engineer...and I think given those vague parameters it's a completely pointless question.

smash wrote: »

Wasn't that the question I asked?

I don't know - you seem to be less asking a question and more looking for confirmation bias as your post to Dolorous above demonstrates. Really, it's no different to any other question regarding what people are likely to find a turn-off/on for either gender and I'd warrant if given a broad enough pool you'll get the same diversity of responses.

smash wrote: »

But what I've talked about since the op was elective surgery.

Necessitates medical intervention doesn't automatically mean the surgery was not also elective. Removal of potentially carcinogenic or deformatory birthmarks or fixing drooping eye-lids are both elective surgeries, after all - but medical intervention is often considered necessary by the affected party.

krudler

Dolorous wrote: »

As far as I know penile enhancement only makes a difference to how it looks flaccid but doesn't increase it's size when erect (good lord I sound like a spambot)

pfff, whats the point so, its only for peeing once flaccid, some guys are growers not showers :pac:

Dolbert

krudler wrote: »

pfff, whats the point so, its only for peeing once flaccid, some guys are growers not showers :pac:

To impress the other dudes in the showers at the gym :pac:

smash

Ickle Magoo wrote: »

Whose acceptance?

Pretty much everyone. While people may not agree with it, they don't really bat an eyelid at the news that someone has had say a breast augmentation.

Ickle Magoo wrote: »

"Never hear of men getting them"? Do you have sources that back up these claims?

Do you know of any men who have had elective plastic surgery to enhance their body?

Ickle Magoo wrote: »

What you are asking is would "a woman" date "a man" given whatever hypothetical situation you engineer...and I think given those vague parameters it's a completely pointless question.

That's just your opinion based on you pointlessly picking apart my post for no reason when you knew what the question was.

Ickle Magoo wrote: »

I don't know - you seem to be less asking a question and more looking for confirmation bias as your post to Dolorous above demonstrates. Really, it's no different to any other question regarding what people are likely to find a turn-off/on for either gender and I'd warrant if given a broad enough pool you'll get the same diversity of responses.

Well I'm asking a question about male elective surgeries which are not heard of much and I'm wondering if the reason behind it is because of the stigma which would be associated with them. And I'm asking how women would react to such surgeries.

Ickle Magoo wrote: »

Necessitates medical intervention doesn't automatically mean the surgery was not also elective. Removal of potentially carcinogenic or deformatory birthmarks or fixing drooping eye-lids are both elective surgeries, after all - but they are often considered necessary by the affected party.

Again you're picking apart my post to suit yourself. Once again, I'm talking about pretty big elective surgery to enhance ones body appearance. I even gave examples from the start.

blacklilly

It'd probably be a turn off for me.

There's plastic surgery for vanity reasons and then for disfigurments, skin graphs etc.

I don't intend to put myself through surgery for vanity reasons and wouldn't be into someone that does tbh.

I have a few friends that have had work done, but it's really not my thing.

Each to their own I guess

krudler

Dolorous wrote: »

To impress the other dudes in the showers at the gym :pac:

everyone knows its not the size of the hammer its how good you are at swinging it :pac:

newport2

It's hardly likely to be something that will come up in a first date conversation, is it?

I suspect by the time you find out about any surgery done, you'll have already made up your mind independantly as to whether your interested in this person or not. At that point if you like them are you really going to dump him/her because of something they had done in the past that had nothing to do with you? Most people wouldn't I think.

Ickle Magoo

smash wrote: »

Pretty much everyone. While people may not agree with it, they don't really bat an eyelid at the news that someone has had say a breast augmentation.

Who doesn't? Pretty much everyone? How can you speak for pretty much everyone? I'd certainly bat an eye-lid if someone I knew had plastic surgery & I don't know anyone who wouldn't bat an eyelid at someone they know having surgery so I'm not sure why you keep insisting, without providing a shred of evidence, that that's the case...

smash wrote: »

Do you know of any men who have had elective plastic surgery to enhance their body?

I know several men who have had nose-jobs and cosmetic dentistry - I am not aware of any woman in my circle of family or friends who has had breast augmentation, tummy-tuck or the like...that's not to say they haven't, I'm just not aware of any...mind you, my male friends could have pec implant and penis enlargement galore and I might just not be aware of that either.

smash wrote: »

That's just your opinion based on you pointlessly picking apart my post for no reason when you knew what the question was.

It's not pointless - your posts read like you had already made your mind up what the answer was and then you decided you'd poll tLL for affirmation. As I said earlier, it's not really much of a question, is it? You may as well be asking hands-up who prefers blonde hair or tall guys when you've already convinced yourself the general preference is X, Y or Z.

smash wrote: »

Well I'm asking a question about male elective surgeries which are not heard of much and I'm wondering if the reason behind it is because of the stigma which would be associated with them. And I'm asking how women would react to such surgeries.

I think all surgery for purely aesthetic reasons carry a degree of stigma - I think one which shouts that you have such an incredibly small cock or such warped body image that you are willing to risk surgical enhancement is surely going to carry stigma for very obvious reasons, no?

I'm also not convinced that penis enlargement is the equivalent to a tummy tuck or breast implants. Unlike a penis, breasts are sometimes viewed as having no other function than being decorative and no exercise is going to help them magically and permanently balloon from an AA to a DD whereas exercise can create defined pecs on a guy. I imagine penis enlargement requires much more intricate and risky surgery or at the very least greater risk of destroying all sexual function which clearly isn't the case when getting implants or a tummy tuck...my initial reaction to hearing a man has risked all the nerve endings and sexual pleasure they derive from their perfectly functioning penis just in order to make it look bigger would be to think there is something seriously amiss going on behind the scenes - and that wouldn't be something I'd instantly find attractive. For the record, I'd view any woman looking for clitoral enlargement the same way.

But even with that said, unless he whaps it out on the table or gets his fake pecs out on date one then any decision on whether to continue onto or with a relationship is going to based on far more than whatever surgeries have been done - as the parts of my posts you selectively ignored clearly state.

smash wrote: »

Again you're picking apart my post to suit yourself. Once again, I'm talking about pretty big elective surgery to enhance ones body appearance. I even gave examples from the start.

So, really you aren't asking about elective surgeries, you aren't asking about surgeries for aesthetics as you've ruled out the examples I gave about eye-lids and moles. You should re-name the thread "would you date a man who's had his penis surgically enhanced" if that's all you mean - but it would still be hypothetical and subjective to the point of meaningless.

I have to agree with newport2; I don't think many people would actually refuse to date someone they otherwise were attracted to because that person didn't fit exactly to whatever exacting set of preferences they have held previously - that goes for anything, including surgery. There are lots of things we consider critical to our tastes for attraction but for the most part they go out the window when any meaningful connection is made.

Catari Jaguar

smash wrote: »

so how would you feel if you met someone and found out he'd had a penis enlargement?

Niiiiice. We can both benefit from that.

I would have no problem with plastic surgery. I hate my own quirks, and would have/ and have had cosmetic fixes. But I love to analyse other people's faces, you know when you love them to bits and the way they have their little faults that you adore, and notice things like how their eyes light up when they speak, how they cock an eyebrow without realising, or have a little chip on a tooth or adorable freckles that they hate... I would be a little upset if my fella say, got a bump on his nose shaved down because I like it, and he wouldn't look like him anymore. But if he wanted it done I'd understand and be supportive.

Not cool to judge on their self esteem, when it's peer's criticisms and society's pressure to look a certain way that probably gave them the self conciousness in the first place...

Catari Jaguar

Dolorous wrote: »

As far as I know penile enhancement only makes a difference to how it looks flaccid but doesn't increase it's size when erect

Wait! What?

What's the point so??

smash

Ickle Magoo wrote: »

but it would still be hypothetical and subjective to the point of meaningless.

Hey, if you want to keep attacking my posts to throw your weight around or make yourself feel more intelligent go ahead. Water off a ducks back. I asked for an opinion, you muddied the waters.

magentas

I would find it an absolute turn off if he'd had cosmetic surgery purely for reasons of vanity.

Maple

smash wrote: »

Hey, if you want to keep attacking my posts to throw your weight around or make yourself feel more intelligent go ahead. Water off a ducks back. I asked for an opinion, you muddied the waters.

Back off there please. Personal attacks such as yours are absolutely uncalled for.

Maple

BadGirl

Smash, just tell us what you've had done already...... photo evidence would be good too :pac::pac::pac:

Maple

BadGirl wrote: »

Smash, just tell us what you've had done already...... photo evidence would be good too :pac::pac::pac:

I appreciate the attempt at humour but lets not drag the thread off topic please.

Maple

smash

Maple wrote: »

Back off there please. Personal attacks such as yours are absolutely uncalled for.

I didn't personally attack.

jaffacakesyum

I wouldn't date a man or woman who's had plastic surgery*

I don't know why you're insinuating a double standard here either; there are plenty of men out there who wouldn't date a woman who's had plastic surgery.



*unless the plastic surgery was due to a medical reason

smash

jaffacakesyum wrote: »

I don't know why you're insinuating a double standard here either; there are plenty of men out there who wouldn't date a woman who's had plastic surgery.

As has been pointed out by mods a few times:
"This forum is for the discussion of topics from a woman's point of view."

So why on earth would I ask about men dating women with plastic surgery? There is no insinuating a double standard here. There is a major stigma involved with men getting cosmetic surgery for aesthetic purposes that isn't there with women. Every day in magazines so and so had a boob job etc but you rarely see articles like that about men. There's the people like Mickey Rourke who will pop up again and again but every day there's gossip about women getting it done.

I feel a lot of men wouldn't get it done because they'd get slagged or put on the spot about it. And I'm wondering would it hold any judgement for a woman knowing a man she liked had something like pec implants.

newport2

smash wrote: »

There is a major stigma involved with men getting cosmetic surgery for aesthetic purposes that isn't there with women. Every day in magazines so and so had a boob job etc but you rarely see articles like that about men. There's the people like Mickey Rourke who will pop up again and again but every day there's gossip about women getting it done.

In fairness, that's exactly where it happens really. In magazines. Has rarely happened in my world.

It's not just stigma for men. I imagine if a woman in work got breast implants there'd be a fair bit of stigma attached to it, people talking etc. I'd go as far as to say irregardless of how much she wanted it, it would take a brave woman to follow it through and get it done. Arriving into work with breasts suddenly doubled in size is not going to go unnoticed! So by no means a free ride for her either (no pun intended).

Ickle Magoo

smash wrote: »

Every day in magazines so and so had a boob job etc but you rarely see articles like that about men.

Who are all these men that the articles should be covering? Serious question...

Articles pop up about mickey rourke not because of some unbalanced stigma but because he looks a complete mess and such articles usually include people like Pam Anderson, Dolly Parton and Jocelyn Wildenstein - that along with the oodles of column inches given over to trout pouts, implant scars, dodgy boob and nose jobs would suggest there is a stigma attached to anyone getting obvious plastic surgery when it comes to the media.

smash

newport2 wrote: »

In fairness, that's exactly where it happens really. In magazines. Has rarely happened in my world.

It's not just stigma for men. I imagine if a woman in work got breast implants there'd be a fair bit of stigma attached to it, people talking etc. I'd go as far as to say irregardless of how much she wanted it, it would take a brave woman to follow it through and get it done. Arriving into work with breasts suddenly doubled in size is not going to go unnoticed! So by no means a free ride for her either (no pun intended).

But like I said earlier I know quite a few women with implants, and they're all quite proud of them.

Maple

You've been around long enough to know the that it's against the charter of all forums to argue against moderators onthread.

Your last post was out of order and you know it. If someone accused you of the same you'd hardly appreciate it.

Rein it in.

Maple

smash wrote: »

I didn't personally attack.

Chickabic

Well if looked like Brad Pitt, yes I would

smash

Ickle Magoo wrote: »

Who are all these men that the articles should be covering? Serious question...

Serious answer... that's my point! So like I said in the post you just quoted:

"I feel a lot of men wouldn't get it done because they'd get slagged or put on the spot about it. And I'm wondering would it hold any judgement for a woman knowing a man she liked had something like pec implants."

Remmus

depends on the surgery... nothing over the top. eg. wouldnt find it strange dating a man who has had surgery for vanity purposes...

Ickle Magoo

smash wrote: »

Serious answer... that's my point! So like I said in the post you just quoted:

"I feel a lot of men wouldn't get it done because they'd get slagged or put on the spot about it. And I'm wondering would it hold any judgement for a woman knowing a man she liked had something like pec implants."

No, my point is perhaps male plastic surgery doesn't permeate the media to the same extent it does for women because its much more unlikely for a guy to want/need pec implants Vs working out/want their tackle filled with cadaver tissue than women want saline bags implanted to create an effect they just cannot simulate naturally...rather than some deep statement about societal pressures/unjust stigmatism?

And like I said in most of my posts - surely your initial question depends on the bloke and woman - and not specifically the pec implants? Everything about people is assessed and judged when it comes to finding someone attractive. Like fake boobs, or whatever other physical trait there are going to be those who are fans/apathetic/dead against fake pecs...

smash

Ickle Magoo wrote: »

No, my point is perhaps male plastic surgery doesn't permeate the media to the same extent it does for women because its much more unlikely for a guy to want/need pec implants Vs working out/want their tackle filled with cadaver tissue than women want saline bags implanted to create an effect they just cannot simulate naturally...rather than some deep statement about societal pressures/unjust stigmatism?

And like I said in most of my posts - surely your initial question depends on the bloke and woman - and not specifically the pec implants? Everything about people is assessed and judged when it comes to finding someone attractive. Like fake boobs, or whatever other physical trait there are going to be those who are fans/apathetic/dead against fake pecs...

Ok, well would you think it would in any way emasculate him?

Ickle Magoo

I don't know - I don't think a man's masculinity is tied up in one aspect of their physicality. It might make him look silly, it might make him look vain, it might make him look like he has moobs - all of which might emasculate him...then again, it might make him look yummy, without pics to judge it's impossible to say.

smash

Ickle Magoo wrote: »

I don't know - I don't think a man's masculinity is tied up in one aspect of their physicality. It might make him look silly, it might make him look vain, it might make him look like he has moobs - all of which might emasculate him...then again, it might make him look yummy, without pics to judge it's impossible to say.

Well they're not exactly great looking: https://www.google.ie/search?q=pec+implants&um=1&ie=UTF-8&hl=en&tbm=isch&source=og&sa=N&tab=wi&ei=b36xT9f4KoHLhAf91KmfCg&biw=1920&bih=965&sei=cn6xT4L2IMODhQfZgLGfCQ

I saw a guy on a documentary before who got them done after the removal of breast tissue which he had grown and he thought he looked great but he looked completely ridicules.

Ickle Magoo

Well, if you think there is a high risk of looking rediculous then you kind of answer your own question...

smash

Well I'm not looking to get any surgery done. Like I said, just a question inspired by a few comments thrown around AH today. So while I think the results will more than likely look ridiculous, others might not and will still proceed.

Hooked

Meh... I'm a bloke and I've had my ears done. Wasnt too shy about admitting it either. Had it done in my late twenties when it was far too late to stop the slagging in school (dumbo, ear-lingus). Stop laughing!!!

Guess I did it for vanity reasons. Was after a bad breakup, had lost over 4 stone and they'd always bugged me.

Confidence increased ten fold. Told my now girlfriend pretty much straight away. Didn't bother her in the slightest.

Though she does threaten to pull them back out when I piss her off. Gives me an awful doing when she sees old pics of me. Not sure if that's the weight or the ears?

Either way. Cosmetic surgery to me was no different than getting braces to correct crooked teeth or laser corrective eye surgery. They weren't right and now they are. It was more corrective than cosmetic.

And no girl I told gave 2 hoots, so they say anyway...

smash

Hooked wrote: »

Meh... I'm a bloke and I've had my ears done.

Slight difference do you not think from the likes of pec implants or a penis enlargement?

Minor corrective or even cosmetic procedures are really not a big deal. I personally have had my nose reset twice after I broke it and had to get my lip sown back onto my face after it split. That's corrective and cosmetic surgery but it's not a big deal in the slightest.

newport2

Hooked

I would have said I wouldn't get any PS done, but I think yours is a valid case to do it and I think I would have done the same thing in your position. Likewise if my teeth were all over the place. Good decision and it sounds like it paid off!

Ickle Magoo

smash wrote: »

Minor corrective or even cosmetic procedures are really not a big deal. I personally have had my nose reset twice after I broke it and had to get my lip sown back onto my face after it split. That's corrective and cosmetic surgery but it's not a big deal in the slightest.

Tell that to Jennifer Grey.

Hooked

smash wrote: »

Hooked wrote: »

Meh... I'm a bloke and I've had my ears done.

Slight difference do you not think from the likes of pec implants or a penis enlargement?

Slight difference alright! If I'd had the same op performed on my penis, I'd be sitting down for ones and twos!

Couldn't resist sorry!