The worst punishment imposed by your parents

Dudess

curlzy wrote: »

Anyone else hoping Kosseegan never has kids?

Probably just trying to wind people up. Like he'd dare say that in person to someone who recounts to him such a traumatic childhood.
I stand by the view that a light slap on the bum as a last resort is no big deal, but obviously beatings are different and utterly repugnant.
Some beauties of parents out there, going by this thread... :-/

I think a dog licence is required in a lot of places though, not just Ireland.

lividduck

mloc wrote: »

It's not a punishment. It's a crime.

If you can't explain to your children why stealing is wrong and instil in them real morals, instead resorting to abuse and instilling fear, that's simply bad parenting.

Bo***x! Kids sometimes do need a smack, aqnd a little fear can be a good thing, within reason needless to say.

mloc

lividduck wrote: »

Bo***x! Kids sometimes do need a smack, aqnd a little fear can be a good thing, within reason needless to say.

Smacking is really just a crutch for poor parenting technique. If you don't have the time or intelligence to give your kids real understanding of right and wrong, you just hit them instead.

Lazy, poor parenting at best. Sadism at worst.

lividduck

mloc wrote: »

Smacking is really just a crutch for poor parenting technique. If you don't have the time or intelligence to give your kids real understanding of right and wrong, you just hit them instead.

Lazy, poor parenting at best. Sadism at worst.

No, real life parenting, you want to let your kids run wild, thats your business, my kids are well raised, balanced, happy individuals who know that to every action there is a consequence.Your need to both personalize the arguement and ridicule those who disagree shows little intelligence or understanding presumabley you dont have children.

mloc

lividduck wrote: »

No, real life parenting, you want to let your kids run wild, thats your business

Oh hi strawman argument, I was wondering when you would arrive.

lividduck

mloc wrote: »

Oh hi strawman argument, I was wondering when you would arrive.

Another smug smartassed yet inconsequential reply, is it damp under you bridge?

Dudess

lividduck wrote: »

mloc wrote: »

It's not a punishment. It's a crime.

If you can't explain to your children why stealing is wrong and instil in them real morals, instead resorting to abuse and instilling fear, that's simply bad parenting.

Bo***x! Kids sometimes do need a smack, aqnd a little fear can be a good thing, within reason needless to say.

People are talking about sadistic beatings for barely misbehaving on this thread though. Not comparable to a smack for being very badly behaved.

mloc

lividduck wrote: »

Another smug smartassed yet inconsequential reply, is it damp under you bridge?

Your original analogy was a strawman argument.

You implied that not beating children and "letting them run wild" were one and the same, when they are clearly different arguments.

Fox McCloud

This thread shows exactly why corporal punishment for kids can never work, doesn't matter if 99% of parents manage to use it fairly and proportionally to the age and size of a child (eg slap with a wooden spoon), there will be a minority that are totally legally free to abuse and destroy helpless children's lives.

No one should be legally allowed to physically harm another person, particularly if that person is smaller, weaker and depends on you for protection.
The basic premise of corporal punishment is that its administered by people who are primarily concerned for the childs well being and future. This thread proves that parents cannot be trusted by virtue of being parents.

I am truly sorry for the abuse that some of the posters have suffered. Ireland has some serious catch up to do in relation to its screwed up attitude to parent hood and child protection.

Kerry hawk

mloc wrote: »

Smacking is really just a crutch for poor parenting technique. If you don't have the time or intelligence to give your kids real understanding of right and wrong, you just hit them instead.

Lazy, poor parenting at best. Sadism at worst.

My Parents smacked me, but let me tell you, the last thing they were, was lazy. As a kid naturally I got up to ****, that was even very dangerous at times. My parents smacked me to make sure I wouldn't do it again, and by god I didn't even contemplate repeating the act. If they didn't do that I could even be dead by now. Do you seriosly think if they pointed their finger and called me ''naughty boy, don't do that again'', that I'd have taken them seriously. If you call parents that slap kids lazy , you insulting a hell of a lot of people. Kid today are messed up, and are incapable of fighting their own corner in life, and guess what, most of them never got a smack in their lives. I know loads of young people,and they can be seriously messed up. They are the generation of kids who supposedly had everything, yet they are the most miserable generation yet. Why?

DazMarz

I know this is trivial compared to most things, and it's not really a 'punishment' as such, but it really killed me inside and I really honestly thought "What the hell do I have to do???" after this incident...

I'm a fanatical fan of Chelsea Football Club. Have been since I was 6 years old. I go over to see matches in England whenever I can, and absolutely love doing so.

Two years ago, Chelsea were playing Manchester United in Stamford Bridge on the 8th of November. This was going to be one of the games of the season, and would have a huge impact on the destination of the Premier League title. And obviously, tickets were like hens' teeth.

My father's birthday is on the 4th of November, and perhaps in a pathetic attempt by me for some affection or approval, I gave him the match ticket I had gotten for the game, booked flights for the two of us to go over for the day and all that.

My father is something of a Man U fan, not really fanatical, but would throw his lot in with them.

For anyone who would support either team, to be given a ticket to such a fixture is unbelievable. And for someone like me to give up a ticket to a game like that is equally unbelievable, but there you go.

I watched the game in a pub near the ground while my father went to the game.

What was the reaction? No thanks, no nothing. Complaining, giving out and being miserable the whole time. I was stunned. It was a cracking game, Chelsea won it 1-0 all that. I was walking on air before meeting up with him, then I was cut down. I was so upset that my gift meant so little. I had literally given up a ticket to a game that people would have given their fúcking eye-teeth for, and didn't get any thanks or anything. I sat in silence on the Tube, the Gatwick Express, the plane... trying not to burst into tears. I was upset that I had done something so, so huge and sacrificed my own ticket and got nothing for it. I was bitter and I was fuming.

I know it's so trivial in the grand scheme of things, but it was like a kick in the stomach for me. It was also partly a horrible realisation that I had attempted to buy love in a pathetic way. But it doesn't work.

Any time I want to go to a match now, I'm going to bring my best friend... who actually loves me for who I am and has been there for me so much.

Sorry for another rant, but I'm finding it a bit theraputic...

Dudess

It's a well known phenomenon for those who don't receive the love they deserve to do whatever they can to get it.

DazMarz, your posts to this thread are heartbreaking. In my opinion, say it to them and then cut them out.

Friel

limklad wrote: »

As much as the feeling to put one over him, it is not worth it. By standing up to him taking his punishment actually does more harm to him in the long run, because of the Law in protecting children from abusive Fathers and the punishment on him are far more severe nowadays, in the short term you will suffer but your bruises and bones can heal and the older you grow and hit 18 your free to do as you will. You be legally an adult and physically still getting to your prime strength. Yet retaliation will get you no where. Revenge is treat badly in Court.

Umm, I might of put across the wrong picture. That was the one time anything remotely physical has every happened to me. Me and my dad are best friends, love him to bits. I deserved to be put back in place. He didn't hit me, just restrained me because I thought I was a big man.

Conall Cernach wrote: »

I still remember fondly the time I left my da on the floor. It's a warm fuzzy feeling that never quite leaves you. He hasn't attempted to raise a fist to me since (mind you I'm near 40 now but that was 20 odd years ago).

Could never do that. Couldn't forgive myself if I hit my dad.

Robdude

mloc wrote: »

Smacking is really just a crutch for poor parenting technique. If you don't have the time or intelligence to give your kids real understanding of right and wrong, you just hit them instead.

Lazy, poor parenting at best. Sadism at worst.

Mankind has struggled with the concept of right and wrong since it's inception. There are entire fields of study where professions dedicate their life to the topic.

My university has seven classes that contain the word 'Ethics' in the title - four of which are at a graduate level. If you include the class description, (classes that focus on the topic of ethics enough for it to be included in the 2-3 sentence summary of the class) that number skyrockets to nearly 100.

I'm very impressed that you have the time and intelligence to give children a real understanding of right and wrong. I'm still struggling to get my four-year-old to pass her Calculus midterm

Milk & Honey

Kerry hawk wrote: »

Kids getting smacked is believe it or not still legal. I.

I would have my doubts about that.

http://www.endcorporalpunishment.org/pages/hrlaw/judgment-avuk.html

mloc

Robdude wrote: »

I'm still struggling to get my four-year-old to pass her Calculus midterm

vixen chaser

I got a right good hiding off my Dad, when I was found smoking in 4th clas in primary school. Never touched a cigg again, so a punishment that paid off, no doubt.:)

kneeler

Deleted User wrote: »

Is this recent, or are we talking a few decades ago? I remember hearing stories from aunties of things like this happening in the 1930s

It was in the 70s. Spanking was a popular punishment back then. A lot of my schoolfriends were spanked. Caning was also popular. Daddy had a cane but didn't use it very often. It was nearly always mom and her spank and paste punishment. After I was about 14 i dedcided that I didn't like having my bare bottom beaten so I decided to obey all of my parents rules and do as they wiashed. i wasn't punished vey often after that, just when I made a mistake.
My best friend used to have the daylights caned out of her. her father was a teacher and used to keep canes standing in water to ensure they were supple. Once when she was 16 her coat went missing at a school disco. She had to hang around for half an hour after it was over to get her coat back. When she got home she got 15 strokes on her bare bottom for being late!. If she had not brought the coat home she would have been caned also.

Owen_S

It's nothing compared to some of the stories here, but I'll talk about it anyway. I was born and raised in the west of Ireland. Years ago me and a few friends were playing basketball down by the playground, but a couple of older lads were up to no good. They started causing trouble, and I got into a fight. Me ma' went mental and told me You're movin with your auntie and uncle in Bel-Air!'.

plasmaguy

Forced to watch Fair City.
No-one should have to go through that.

bath handle

kneeler wrote: »

Deleted User wrote: »

Is this recent, or are we talking a few decades ago? I remember hearing stories from aunties of things like this happening in the 1930s

It was in the 70s. Spanking was a popular punishment back then. A lot of my schoolfriends were spanked. Caning was also popular. Daddy had a cane but didn't use it very often. It was nearly always mom and her spank and paste punishment. After I was about 14 i dedcided that I didn't like having my bare bottom beaten so I decided to obey all of my parents rules and do as they wiashed. i wasn't punished vey often after that, just when I made a mistake.
My best friend used to have the daylights caned out of her. her father was a teacher and used to keep canes standing in water to ensure they were supple. Once when she was 16 her coat went missing at a school disco. She had to hang around for half an hour after it was over to get her coat back. When she got home she got 15 strokes on her bare bottom for being late!. If she had not brought the coat home she would have been caned also.

i can't imagine caning and spanking being popular with the recipients .

pickarooney

At least it's good to see that most of the abused children in this thread recognise what has happened to them and are unlikely to replicate the torture on their own kids but there are one or two individuals who unfortunately have been brainwashed as well as physically and psychologically abused and who are now perpetuating the same on their own offspring. It's absolutely tragic to see this.

Mr. Presentable

Three younger sisters

Kosseegan

kneeler wrote: »

My best friend used to have the daylights caned out of her. her father was a teacher and used to keep canes standing in water to ensure they were supple. .

Quite right too. Canes which dry out can shatter and cause serious injury. It is shocking when people say they were hit with a bamboo, which may have been dried out months before.

Kosseegan

Kosseegan wrote: »

Quite right too. Canes which dry out can shatter and cause serious injury. It is shocking when people say they were hit with a bamboo, which may have been dried out months before.

The former headmaster at my secondary school was one of those who left them dry, an older brother of a friend was caned by him just before he retired, broke six canes and the boy had to go to the doctor afterwards.:eek:

kneeler

kneeler wrote: »

It was in the 70s. Spanking was a popular punishment back then. A lot of my schoolfriends were spanked. Caning was also popular. Daddy had a cane but didn't use it very often. It was nearly always mom and her spank and paste punishment. After I was about 14 i dedcided that I didn't like having my bare bottom beaten so I decided to obey all of my parents rules and do as they wiashed. i wasn't punished vey often after that, just when I made a mistake.
My best friend used to have the daylights caned out of her. her father was a teacher and used to keep canes standing in water to ensure they were supple. Once when she was 16 her coat went missing at a school disco. She had to hang around for half an hour after it was over to get her coat back. When she got home she got 15 strokes on her bare bottom for being late!. If she had not brought the coat home she would have been caned also.

You're about the same age as me so, I was brought up in the UK where caning went "out of fashion" in the 1960s.

Milk & Honey

Kosseegan wrote: »

Quite right too. Canes which dry out can shatter and cause serious injury. It is shocking when people say they were hit with a bamboo, which may have been dried out months before.

Water would also make the cane heavier so causing more damage when delivering its payload. But that is alright I suppose? Heaven forbid the cane should break before tearing and the bum flesh of the children on the receiving end.

lividduck

Deleted User wrote: »

You're about the same age as me so, I was brought up in the UK where caning went "out of fashion" in the 1960s.

Usually agree with you, but your wrong there, I am in my late 40's and felt the cane often enough in my youth , most of which was in england.

lividduck

lividduck wrote: »

Usually agree with you, but your wrong there, I am in my late 40's and felt the cane often enough in my youth , most of which was in england.

I suppose it really depends on where you were and what type of school you went to.

Where I went the cane was seldom used, you had to do something really bad to get it, had friends who went to another school and most got caned at some time.

bath handle

dolanbaker wrote: »

lividduck wrote: »

Usually agree with you, but your wrong there, I am in my late 40's and felt the cane often enough in my youth , most of which was in england.

I suppose it really depends on where you were and what type of school you went to.

Where I went the cane was seldom used, you had to do something really bad to get it, had friends who went to another school and most got caned at some time.

School punishments are different. This thread is about parental punishments . I would think Irish parents were using canes and straps beyond the 70 s.