Kids - what's the point?

MrThrifty

smash wrote: »

Yea it is but technologies and sciences are moving faster now than ever so why would you worry about it?

That's kinda everyone's take on oil too - i.e. era it'll be grand and sure they'll come up with an alternative before it's too late... :rolleyes:

smash wrote: »

I have an idea, why don't we just exterminate people at retirement age. That should sort out a lot, it will mean no pensions too!

Well, isn't it a lot more practical for people to be more sensible about if and how many kids they have in the first place?!

smash

MrThrifty wrote: »

That's kinda everyone's take on oil too - i.e. era it'll be grand and sure they'll come up with an alternative before it's too late... :rolleyes:

Hydrogen power will have its day. Anyway, this isn't the thread for that.

MrThrifty wrote: »

Well, isn't it a lot more practical for people to be more sensible about if and how many kids they have in the first place?!

That's what people do, they base the size of their families around what they can afford. If they don't then they're stupid.

BraziliaNZ

smash wrote: »

That's what people do, they base the size of their families around what they can afford. If they don't then they're stupid.

From what I noticed, growing up in Dublin, is that the poorer and less educated the family the more kids they'd have. So I guess all poor people are stupid.

smash

BraziliaNZ wrote: »

From what I noticed, growing up in Dublin, is that the poorer and less educated the family the more kids they'd have. So I guess all poor people are stupid.

Obviously, that's why they're poor!

:P

Teyla Emmagan

BraziliaNZ wrote: »

From what I noticed, growing up in Dublin, is that the poorer and less educated the family the more kids they'd have. So I guess all poor people are stupid.

Ah come on, why do you think that is? Do the words 'child benefit' mean nothing to you?

Frank Black

Kasabian wrote: »

The best thing about having kids is the unconditional love that they show you.

That, and the lego.

I love lego.

Unless I stand on it in bare feet of course.

Ray Palmer

Kasabian wrote: »

The best thing about having kids is the unconditional love that they show you.


It is pure, at least until they grow up and figure you out.

I dog will do that and never grow out of it.

Ray Palmer

Teyla Emmagan wrote: »

For the greater majority of women their fertility doesn't start to decline until after 35. Your friends may have been over reacting a bit with their rabid desire to get pregnant.

Personally I don't think tricking someone into having a baby with you is ever going to prove a good move.

What you missed there was that it isn't just my friends and they didn't agree. The problem was at least 50% admitted it. I think it was Life magazine that did one of the surveys.

They did a show on the radio about it and lots of woman were quite "understanding" that when the desire kicks in that what ever somebody does to get pregnant was fair enough. My mother axctually agreed with it too. It is generally accepted men can be quite driven by their sex drives while ignored that woman have a sex drive and a desire for babies. There will always people who give into their urges. Don't foreget woman lie less than men but are better at it.

saa

BraziliaNZ wrote: »

From what I noticed, growing up in Dublin, is that the poorer and less educated the family the more kids they'd have. So I guess all poor people are stupid.

Ew poor people, so yeah all those flights you've taken and all the electricity you've wasted being on the internet today

you are some eco warrior. :pac:

BraziliaNZ

smash wrote: »

Use your intelligence will you. A decade ago there was no broadband, mobile phones only made calls and sent text messages, VHS were still being sold in shops, hardly anyone had flat screen TV's, there were no wind energy farms etc etc.

It's moving very fkn fast!

Right and how is broadband and people buying i-phones making the world more sustainable? How are you linking this technology with us being more in touch with the planet? Wind energy is hardly lighting up the energy world.

BraziliaNZ

saa wrote: »

Ew poor people, so yeah all those flights you've taken and all the electricity you've wasted being on the internet today

you are some eco warrior. :pac:

I'm not claiming to be one, I just think it's funny that people think our population can just keep growing and growing and it wont have any effect on the planet. It is definitely the number one issue facing the human race IMO.

Dolbert

BraziliaNZ wrote: »

I'm not claiming to be one, I just think it's funny that people think our population can just keep growing and growing and it wont have any effect on the planet. It is definitely the number one issue facing the human race IMO.

I think it's funny that you're claiming this as your reason why you don't want kids! If you don't want 'em, fair enough, but don't pretend it's down to your concern about the planet :pac:

flutterflye

Really can't understand the big debate.
Some people want kids, others don't, others may not want any now but will change their mind.

Personal choice really, although it becomes a big issue when you are in a serious relationship with a person who wants kids and you don't, or visa versa.

Anyway, my kids are little bastards - they were 3 and 7 at our wedding

karaokeman

What if no one in the world wanted kids, we would all become extinct:eek:?

Meow_Meow

karaokeman wrote: »

What if no one in the world wanted kids, we would all become extinct:eek:?

You don't need to want kids to get pregnant :pac:

kincsem

kincsem wrote: »

Last time I was in a nursing home (Saturday) most of the residents were married. People do not mind their incontinent, demented, confused parents at home.

Exactly.....Offspring know they are entitled to your hardearned.
It is the heirless, who are beating off the helpful types in their dotage.


I want babies.....but only if they are ginger.

bbam

BraziliaNZ wrote: »

Hi all. I was reading on personal issues about women worrying about being too old to have kids etc, how they want them so badly, and their life would never be complete without them. I also know a few girls in their 30s that are deeply depressed by the fact that they're single and still don't have kids, it seems they want kids to make their lives complete. Why is this such an issue? Is there something programmed into women that make them broody and depressed if they don't have kids? Isn't it a bit dangerous to be pinning your happiness on the birth of a child?
I'm 31 and never want kids, I don't see the appeal. In fact, the appeal of never having any just seems fantastic, hassle free life without the horrible little bastards ruining everything and sapping your resources.

In fairness with an attitude like that it's a sensible decision... Maybe a pity your parents didn't think the same...

Surely you can see the problem with your statement if everyone didn't bother having kids or are you too short sighted and inward looking to see that too:rolleyes:

pragmatic1

I think most people would like to have kids OP. Its a kinda natural urge. I personally dont want them but I can see the appeal.

Abi

pragmatic1 wrote: »

I think most people would like to have kids OP. Its a kinda natural urge. I personally dont want them but I can see the appeal.

I dunno. I can see the entertainment side of an evil one..

I'd get hours of entertainment outta this lil broad

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XF7b_MNEIAg

sam34

Paparazzo wrote: »

And find someone with kids that regrets having them. You'll have a hard time.

.


I know quite a few. my sister. a friend of mine. and lots that I encounter through my work. and those that I meet professionally often tell me that they could never admit their regret to their family/friends but can only do so to me as it will be confidential.

Abi

sam34 wrote: »

.


I know quite a few. my sister. a friend of mine. and lots that I encounter through my work. and those that I meet professionally often tell me that they could never admit their regret to their family/friends but can only do so to me as it will be confidential.

Are we talking regretting having children at a certain time of their lives, or is it full on resentment? I pity any child in the last bracket.

dj jarvis

BraziliaNZ wrote: »

I don't expect anyone to mind me. Anyway I have bupa, and the girls in Thailand always stay young.

so you are going to be a gruby old fart who pays post op children for sex :eek:

you keeps reaching for the stars champ !!

Eric Cartman

it seems these days that kids are just something that poor / uneducated people do most. It just seems that the smarter / more successful you are the less kids you have.

I cant understand the appeal, its an 18 year minimum ball and chain that drains everything out of you, wont be for me.

sam34

Abi wrote: »

Are we talking regretting having children at a certain time of their lives, or is it full on resentment? I pity any child in the last bracket.

full on resentment. people that had unplanned pregnancies or those who had kids because it was what was expected of them, or to try keep a relationship intact. and yeah, I pity those kids too.

Immaculate Pasta

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0vBpcSEdcRc

:cool:

Son Of A Vidic

summerskin wrote: »

Kids don't ruin anything, they make things many times better. Nothing comes close.

You don't get out much do you?

boomkatalog

Children are awesome.

They're like little drunk people: talk a lot of amusing rubbish, full of hugs but may have mood swings, likely to wee themselves and vomit, and fond of boobs.

Think of a conversation you've had drunk, replace the word 'fcuk' with 'silly' and Bam! You're 3. Awesome.

suzzi

kids - what's the point?

my humble opinion as follows;

if you don't want children don't have them
if you are trying to have children best of luck to you
if you do have children give them all the love and support you can

But..please, don't call them "kids".....we're talking about little people here - not the "are we there yet? goat"...

Frank Black

boomkatalog wrote: »

Children are awesome.

They're like little drunk people: talk a lot of amusing rubbish, full of hugs but may have mood swings, likely to wee themselves and vomit, and fond of boobs.

Think of a conversation you've had drunk, replace the word 'fcuk' with 'silly' and Bam! You're 3. Awesome.

They also keep unsociable hours, often waking up in the middle of the night demanding drink.

10 years ago, I was like a lot of the posters on here, couldn't see the appeal, would have been just as glad to remain childless.

Now I wouldn't swap my two for anything.

Though I'd gladly give them away for a couple of hours every now and then

Abi

sam34 wrote: »

full on resentment. people that had unplanned pregnancies or those who had kids because it was what was expected of them, or to try keep a relationship intact. and yeah, I pity those kids too.

Jesus o_O

Children don't ask to be born, I pity the parents they're born to. I suppose you can't tell them to take certain actions, but if a parent shows a child resentment day in day out, they'd want to be thinking of giving the child up for adoption. I suppose they'd have little interaction or affection towards their kids, and thats very unfair. Depriving a child of love and affection is so wrong.

In cases like these, do you know of any that gave up their children, or are they just continuing dragging them up? I hate to think of kids growing up in that kind of an environment.

Sorry for picking your brain on this one, just genuinely interested.

Kasabian

Ray Palmer wrote: »

I dog will do that and never grow out of it.

Are they made by Apple?

sam34

sam34 wrote: »

full on resentment. people that had unplanned pregnancies or those who had kids because it was what was expected of them, or to try keep a relationship intact. and yeah, I pity those kids too.

Do you think it is mostly unhappiness with the situation.
Or do you think that there is something else wrong mentally with those parents.
Even if you couldn't see any good in the situation.
I can't fathom not eventually coming to terms, with a disappointment like that. Especially when it redfines your life. Surely you would lose the will to resist in the long run.

travelledpengy

black francis wrote: »

They're very handy for cleaning chimneys this time of year in fairness.

LOL

I'm a bit young to be worrying about kids, maybe some day. my former roommate in college just learned she is pregnant.

bbam

Abi wrote: »

Children don't ask to be born, I pity the parents they're born to.

Seriously, you make it sound like having a child is imposed on some people... I'd say there are multiples of children to feel sorry for compared to the number of crappy parents we should feel sorry for...

It's so common to see parents shout/swear and hit their kids and generally treat them like crap, some parents are a bloody disgrace..
As selfish and narrow-minded as OP is at least they made a wise decision not to bring a child into the world only to resent it for changing their lifestyle.

nlgbbbblth

BraziliaNZ wrote: »

Hi all. I was reading on personal issues about women worrying about being too old to have kids etc, how they want them so badly, and their life would never be complete without them. I also know a few girls in their 30s that are deeply depressed by the fact that they're single and still don't have kids, it seems they want kids to make their lives complete. Why is this such an issue? Is there something programmed into women that make them broody and depressed if they don't have kids? Isn't it a bit dangerous to be pinning your happiness on the birth of a child?
I'm 31 and never want kids, I don't see the appeal. In fact, the appeal of never having any just seems fantastic, hassle free life without the horrible little bastards ruining everything and sapping your resources.

HIPSTER ALERT. :rolleyes:

DEFTLEFTHAND

Someone has to inherit my vast business empire.

Abi

bbam wrote: »

Seriously, you make it sound like having a child is imposed on some people...

What are you talking about?

I'd say there are multiples of children to feel sorry for compared to the number of crappy parents we should feel sorry for...

I never said otherwise, I was talking about a very specific circumstance here, resentment.

Acoshla

I'm a girl and I can't have kids....because I hate them.

Can't stand the feckers, as it is now unless the "I'm 30!" hormone switch suddenly flicks in my head I won't be having them, I like my sleep, my relationship, my freedom, and my ability to cough without peeing. Without the biological urge to reproduce kicking in I will still think they are noisy, dirty, annoying, expensive and boring, that does not make a good mother.

Kiera

Acoshla wrote: »

I'm a girl and I can't have kids....because I hate them.

Can't stand the feckers, as it is now unless the "I'm 30!" hormone switch suddenly flicks in my head I won't be having them, I like my sleep, my relationship, my freedom, and my ability to cough without peeing. Without the biological urge to reproduce kicking in I will still think they are noisy, dirty, annoying, expensive and boring, that does not make a good mother.

Made me laugh out loud

Aurum

Choosing to have children is a very personal thing, and people should think very carefully before deciding to have them. Unfortunately, it's impossible to know how you're going to react to parenthood until you've actually had children, and then it's too late to decide that it wasn't for you after all.

I've never wanted children, I'm completely devoid of maternal instinct. To be honest, I've always actively disliked them. People who believe that people never resent their children are incredibly naive. I know two women who have told me that, if given the option, they would prefer to have their pre-children lives back and to have taken a different path in life. It wasn't said in a moment of despair or anger either, they were quite serious. Also, it wasn't because they wanted more sleep or disposable income, it's just that they realized too late that motherhood just wasn't for them.

And the "at least you won't be alone when you die" argument is stupid. Both because, as others have said, very few children actually care for their elderly parents on a permanent basis. And even if they do, why would it be considered a good idea to spend one's life caring for children if it's something that you really don't want to do, and get minimum enjoyment or fulfillment from, just so you can spend the last few months of your life not lonely. Do what makes you happy for the many decades before decrepitude sets in, don't plan your entire life focusing on the last short part of it.

bbam

Abi wrote: »

What are you talking about?

.

Perhaps I misread your comments but you seemed to be showing pity for people who were crappy parents?? I'd tend to pity the children and throttle the parents

AudreyHepburn

I want children some day and in general I won't judge anyone who doesn't. It's a personal choice OP and not one you should look down on anyone for.

However if all you can say about children is they ruin your life and are pointless then perhaps you are better off without them.

wandatowell

What the point of having kids???


Why free social housing and vast handouts from the government................... all in the name of the unwanted b@stard children of this country.

God bless Ireland and its fatherless children

Kiera

wandatowell wrote: »

What the point of having kids???


Why free social housing and vast handouts from the government................... all in the name of the unwanted b@stard children of this country.

God bless Ireland and its fatherless children

Bastards.

saa

wandatowell wrote: »

What the point of having kids???


Why free social housing and vast handouts from the government................... all in the name of the unwanted b@stard children of this country.

God bless Ireland and its fatherless children

Social housing isn't free, you'll be glad to know having a kid doesn't necessarily get you a house anymore, plenty of homeless bastard children.

Don't worry I detected your sarcasm.

Sittingpretty

It's perfectly ok not to want children. It's not selfish, it is responsible not to have children if you don't really really want them.

What is not ok is to condescend to those of us that do have children, to suggest that they are all dirty brats and lives with them are lives somehow compromised.

As a mother I find that deeply insulting, I know this is AH but statements suggesting that mothers are only holding onto their continence by a thin thread make my blood boil.

CathyMoran

I love watching a little person grow up and trying to help them as much as possible along the way. There is also the baby stage which while tiring is incredibly enjoyable - seeing your child smiling is wonderful.

I have always wanted to be a parent, I only dated men who wanted children. I was petrified that I would not be good enough.

We went through a lot to have ours and I am loving being a parent.

krudler

I'm indifferent to having them tbh, if I wound up marrying someone (something else I'm indifferent to) and we had one I wouldnt be opposed to it, but I dont think its essential I have kids either, its not like the world is underpopulated or anything.

Acoshla

Sittingpretty wrote: »

As a mother I find that deeply insulting, I know this is AH but statements suggesting that mothers are only holding onto their continence by a thin thread make my blood boil.

Some women are! A relative of mine has had two surgeries to help her attempt to hold onto her continence with not much success, I wasn't exaggerating. But y'know, you used the "as a mother" line, so I must be the wrong one.

Edit: Also, I said I think kids are all those things, I never said they actually were, perfect example of my perception of parenthood, not the reality.

Frank Black

Acoshla wrote: »

I'm a girl and I can't have kids....because I hate them.

Can't stand the feckers, as it is now unless the "I'm 30!" hormone switch suddenly flicks in my head I won't be having them, I like my sleep, my relationship, my freedom, and my ability to cough without peeing. Without the biological urge to reproduce kicking in I will still think they are noisy, dirty, annoying, expensive and boring, that does not make a good mother.

They sure are, at least I've found everyone else's kids are.

Mine are obviously adorable though.