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Do you ever think about your loved ones dying?

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2

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    #32
    John Doe1
    Registered Users Posts: 2,921 ✭✭✭John Doe1


    Millicent wrote: »
    Don't be sorry at all. Just make sure you're talking care of yourself. :)

    Thanks:)


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    #33
    brummytom
    Registered Users Posts: 10,572 ✭✭✭✭brummytom


    I often think about what I'd say at other peoples' funerals...


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    #34
    uch
    Registered Users Posts: 7,008 ✭✭✭uch


    My Ma died two weeks ago and my biggest dread was people coming up to shake hands with me after the service, was glad my missus knew the undertaker and got him to arrange to take my Ma's remains out straight away when the priest was finished, it was nice when anybody in the Cemetery wanted to give their condolences because I knew them all.

    21/25



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    #35
    s14driftking
    Registered Users Posts: 646 ✭✭✭s14driftking


    im 30 and tbh if family died in the morning i dont think it would affect me. i have a bad relationship with bro and sis and not much better with mother. To be far only one i think id miss would be my dad


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    #36
    DEFTLEFTHAND
    Registered Users Posts: 16,500 ✭✭✭✭DEFTLEFTHAND


    I try not to, but its something in life that most unfortunately will have to experience.


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    #37
    uch
    Registered Users Posts: 7,008 ✭✭✭uch


    s14driftking wrote: »
    im 30 and tbh if family died in the morning i dont think it would affect me. i have a bad relationship with bro and sis and not much better with mother. To be far only one i think id miss would be my dad


    Wanna Bet?

    21/25



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    #38
    Dave147
    Registered Users Posts: 3,235 ✭✭✭Dave147


    The only reason I still live in this country is because I want to spend as much time with my mom as possible because I know she won't be around forever, she is also unwell at the moment so it makes me think about it a lot more, it's really really difficult as I'm very close to my parents, especially my mother.. When I was a child I used suffer sleepless nights over it.

    I just hope all my family reach old age, can't ask for anything more than that..


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    #39
    ottostreet
    Closed Accounts Posts: 4,987 ✭✭✭ottostreet


    I often have times where I realise that in 50 years time, very few people I know now will still be alive. In 100 years, there will be an entirely new set of 6-7 billion people inhabiting our world, and we will all have been dead & gone quite a while. It's depressing, but realism.

    I hate the fact that life exists, simply because it also includes death. And no, I'm not depressed or a negative type of person, I am atheist, and it's at times when I think like this, I understand why so many people embrace religion, it is so comforting and warm by comparison.


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    #40
    ballsacky
    Closed Accounts Posts: 461 ✭✭ballsacky


    Always worried about it growing up then I lost my father a year ago this Monday. Never thought I would cope with something like that,but I did.


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    #41
    Chuck Stone
    Closed Accounts Posts: 13,030 ✭✭✭✭Chuck Stone


    I'm very lucky to not have lost anyone who I've been very close to. Parents are getting older now and it's there in the back of my mind regular enuf.

    Jesus this is a fierce sad thread. :'''(


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    #42
    LH Pathe
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,515 ✭✭✭LH Pathe


    Sometimes I suspect a mother may be a greater loss but then da wasn't really around in later yrs and probably needed to be taken out of his misery tbh.. too many emotional and physical ailments at 50, old beyond his years of course the his side will say he died of a broken heart but in truth death by sclerosis of liver suggests peg leg was awful fond of the booze. And shouldn't have played away


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    #43
    TentCrasher
    Closed Accounts Posts: 80 ✭✭TentCrasher


    After losing a few close friends, I try to stay well clear of thinking of death. Iam lucky enough to still have my parents, siblings and partner. It be a true test if I lost any of them.


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    #44
    davemc180
    Registered Users Posts: 286 ✭✭davemc180


    i lost a friend was devastating , my mam was diagnosed with breast cancer 5 year ago when i was sitting my leaving cert, its had me in bits, but she pulled threw, but then last year she was diagnosed with bone marrow cancer and had to have a Hysterectomy done due to side effects...

    i love her to bits and shes always on my mind, shes on the mend again now though thank god

    id be devastated if i lost her and have thought about it many times


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    #45
    beks101
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,802 ✭✭✭beks101


    No way. I won't survive any such loss, it will be the death of me. So I refuse to think about it.


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    #46
    KeithAFC
    Closed Accounts Posts: 10,239 ✭✭✭✭KeithAFC


    ottostreet wrote: »
    I often have times where I realise that in 50 years time, very few people I know now will still be alive. In 100 years, there will be an entirely new set of 6-7 billion people inhabiting our world, and we will all have been dead & gone quite a while. It's depressing, but realism.

    I hate the fact that life exists, simply because it also includes death. And no, I'm not depressed or a negative type of person, I am atheist, and it's at times when I think like this, I understand why so many people embrace religion, it is so comforting and warm by comparison.
    Being an Atheist or Agnostic does not mean you need to have such a miserable out look. And being religious can often bring the opposite to comfort. Religious people are constantly discussing what happens after death and death isn't far from the mind.

    A person who doesn't give a shyte is often in the best position.


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    #47
    zenno
    Closed Accounts Posts: 5,377 ✭✭✭zenno


    This is a question that can never be simply answered, and i have thought about this as well in the past.

    all you can do is do your best to look after the people you love and treat them with respect and spend plenty of time enjoying their company and making them happy. we will all go sometime but remembering the good memories after they do pass away is the key to recovering from the loss.


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    #48
    AeoNGriM
    Registered Users Posts: 712 ✭✭✭AeoNGriM


    SEPT 23 1989 wrote: »
    "And I am not frightened of dying. Any time will do. I don't mind. Why should I be frightened of dying?"

    Kudos for the Floyd quote, and I would agree. I'm not frightened of dying, but I'm absolutely terrifiied of a family member going though.


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    #49
    stovelid
    Closed Accounts Posts: 27,252 ✭✭✭✭stovelid


    I go through stages of terror that something would happen to my kids - usually inspired by stories you hear about but like Biggins said, you have to try not to think about it or you'd go mad.

    Obviously as my parents are both hitting 70 now, their mortality has been on my mind a lot more of late.


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    #50
    IvyTheTerrible
    Closed Accounts Posts: 14,949 ✭✭✭✭IvyTheTerrible


    I never used to think about it, til my brother died, and then the possibility became more "real". Also, my parents are getting older so they are getting more health problems, which made me realise they won't be here forever.

    I try not to dwell on it though, and to enjoy our time together. Otherwise you are wasting time.


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    #51
    Mr Benevolent
    Closed Accounts Posts: 12,456 ✭✭✭✭Mr Benevolent


    Yeah I do, for years now. No fun, but I'm getting better at blocking the thoughts out or distracting myself.


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    #52
    LeeHoffmann
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,770 ✭✭✭LeeHoffmann


    I've had to think about it because so many family members were dying and/or died. (I'm 27, both parents deceased and six family members died in the last 6 years). It's normal to fear the death of your loved ones, particularly if somebody close to you is sick or dies. The thing is though, no matter how much you try to 'prepare' yourself for losing them, it doesn't hurt any less when you do. And no matter how much you try to hold onto and savour the moments, eventually those moments run out. So what I'm saying is...it's normal to think about it but it doesn't do any good. Just have compassion for others who experience the loss and try to make the time you have with your loved ones the best it can be.


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    #53
    Son Of A Vidic
    Registered Users Posts: 32,370 ✭✭✭✭Son Of A Vidic


    Deleted User wrote: »
    I just had to endure a loved one dying tuesday.

    I knew the end had been coming for her for awhile.. But I honestly thought she'd live forever.. as childish as that may seem.

    I'm trying not to think of anything morbid at all right now, or else.. it will lead to me to break down.

    The one thing I would seriously advise you to do, is to never bottle up your grief or emotions. That will definitely lead you to break down. There are a number of stages involved in the grieving process we all will go through. From shock to anger, denial, pain, ect ,ect. There is no time scale for how long this process takes and no particular order involved. Just accept it and don't fight it.


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    #54
    ottostreet
    Closed Accounts Posts: 4,987 ✭✭✭ottostreet


    KeithAFC wrote: »
    Being an Atheist or Agnostic does not mean you need to have such a miserable out look. And being religious can often bring the opposite to comfort. Religious people are constantly discussing what happens after death and death isn't far from the mind.

    A person who doesn't give a shyte is often in the best position.

    Thing is...I don't have a miserable outlook, I'm quite a happy chappy. But I am realistic about life and the ultimate pointlessness of everything, which just means I want to enjoy my life as much as I can!


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    #55
    noddy78779
    Registered Users Posts: 76 ✭✭noddy78779


    wow.. Reading this thread brought up a lot of memories of past loves one who are long gone. From the cousins in their teens to my grandparents. But i take solace in the fact that i remember only the good times i had and have to think hard to find a bad experience that i may have had with them.<br />
    <br />
    But sure, death is the only certainty in life that will afflict us all. I think from time to time at the thought of losing more close ones, and sometimes im reduced to tears. But makes me get over the stupid arguments we have so that we can enjoy each others company for that while longer.


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    #56
    KeithAFC
    Closed Accounts Posts: 10,239 ✭✭✭✭KeithAFC


    ottostreet wrote: »
    Thing is...I don't have a miserable outlook, I'm quite a happy chappy. But I am realistic about life and the ultimate pointlessness of everything, which just means I want to enjoy my life as much as I can!
    Why is it pointless?


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    #57
    ottostreet
    Closed Accounts Posts: 4,987 ✭✭✭ottostreet


    KeithAFC wrote: »
    Why is it pointless?

    What is the purpose behind every action? Beyond looking after the needs of yourself or other people?


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    #58
    mackg
    Registered Users Posts: 3,938 ✭✭✭mackg


    ottostreet wrote: »
    What is the purpose behind every action? Beyond looking after the needs of yourself or other people?

    Is that not enough?


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    #59
    Kasabian
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,689 ✭✭✭Kasabian


    This thread has inspired me to visit or ring all the people I love today, just to tell them I love them.


    My Mum will call a family meeting tomorrow to check if I have told anyone whether I am sick, depressed, in trouble, lost my job. :)


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    #60
    Jamie Starr
    Registered Users Posts: 1,498 ✭✭✭Jamie Starr


    Thinking about death is really important. It makes you want to go out and do things, hug everyone you know and tell them how much they mean to you. The actual inhibitor for all this behaviour is life. We're constantly confronted with life, so we sit around thinking there's plenty of time for everything. Even when we do have those moments of clarity about death, I know I always revert back to my usual, lazy self after awhile. Much better to think about your own and other's mortality, it might actually compel you to use your life in a much better way.

    *continues to lurk around boards.ie*


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    #61
    John Doe1
    Registered Users Posts: 2,921 ✭✭✭John Doe1


    Kasabian wrote: »
    This thread has inspired me to visit or ring all the people I love today, just to tell them I love them.


    My Mum will call a family meeting tomorrow to check if I have told anyone whether I am sick, depressed, in trouble, lost my job. :)

    Ha nice one:), after i started this thread me and my mother had a great heart of heart in which i told her I loved which i dont do often enough.


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