Physical violence against men in the Irish media...

py2006

LeeHoffmann wrote: »

translation: well now that I don't like the conclusions of our discussion, I'm going to start all over again.

No, I agreed that both men and women laugh at it.

you're generalising and making assumptions. Expected of them by whom? Seen as less of a man by whom?

Again, society! And no I am not making assumptions, I have eyes and ears and experience.

some women yes. Also, some men, didn't we agree? But wait - when women laugh it's cause it's funny; when men laugh it's because they feel the heavy weight of social expectation upon them. See anything wrong with this way of reasoning?

I never said these perceptions were right.

I used the word 'some' for a reason, no need to highlight to generate your own point.

Lets not start on the whole ALL V SOME thing! When I refer to society, I mean it is my observation of what is seen/said/done generally and not by ALL.

LeeHoffmann

No, I agreed that both men and women laugh at it.

You did, but when that led to the conclusion that women take FVAM no less seriously than men, you revised your point and tried to suggest a difference between men and women's reactions again.

I am not making assumptions, I have eyes and ears and experience.

I too have eyes, ears and experience but I don't present my experiences and impressions as though they are universal or widely agreed upon. Instead I'll say things like 'in my opinion' or 'it seems to me' or 'in my experience'. I won't just state my experience as though it were universally true e.g. -

Men laugh because that is what is expected of them.

that sounds like all men laugh for that reason or most men laugh for that reason or it is widely agreed upon that men laugh for that reason; it doesn't sound like it is just your opinion.

I never said these perceptions were right.

They're your perceptions. Why would you say them if you don't think they're right?

When I refer to society, I mean it is my observation of what is seen/said/done generally and not by ALL.

OK maybe you don't mean to suggest that women are more to blame etc etc. I promise you I'm not trying to hound you or interpret your posts unfairly, but a number of your posts on a number of different threads seem to me to suggest that you blame women as a group for many of the problems faced by men as a group. In this thread, some of your posts seem to suggest that women are more to blame than men are for the frivolous attitudes to FVAM. The easiest way to sort out the disagreement between us is to answer whether you think this is the case or not.

py2006

Ok, this is getting annoying now!

This thread is about physical violence against men in the media. It is my opinion, that the portrayal of violence towards men in the media is very different to how they portray violence against women. End of.

LeeHoffmann

It is my opinion, that the portrayal of violence towards men in the media is very different to how they portray violence against women

I agree with that.
Is it your opinion that women are more to blame than men are for the frivolous attitudes to FVAM? That's a simple question. Why not just answer? - yes/no/somewhat/no opinion. I won't push it any further if you don't want to answer but I really don't get your reluctance - surely if you're aware that there's a problem, you want to fix it? And surely figuring out the source of the problem can help?

HellFireClub

What annoys me is that there is this endless ranting going on about equality, even an act of chiverly or kindness towards a woman is now taken up as offensive, as some kind of implied mention of weakeness of their gender, yet we have a massive double standard here, where it is still clearly acceptable for woman to clatter and wallop a man on the face, because "he deserved it"...

I think that this blatant double standard, from the same congregation that are not able to shut up about equality these days, who are actually managing now to find a fault in kindness where it is shown to them, to be stomach churning.

LeeHoffmann

That would be a double standard alright. Some people see it as acceptable for a woman to slap a man but I think that's changing.

You know that I'm one of those people who doesn't like the chivalry stuff (such as men giving up seats for able-bodied women, holding doors open only for women, playing the role of big male protector in situations where there is no physical threat) but who also disapproves of women hitting men...I can't be the only woman who doesn't fit with your correlation of 'anti-chivalry' and 'pro-male abuse'

Eve_Dublin

I don't think it's acceptable at all. I abore violence and any talk of it and whta we'd do to someone else makes us sound like monkeys. My boyfriend was punched in the face by his ex during an argument (he wouldn't and has never hit anyone or even got into a fight) yet this girl is still considered "lovely" among her friends that I know and they know what happened and even my boyfriend excuses the behaviour to some degree but there's not a hope in hell it would be the same if he hit her. It's NOT cool. How dare anyone lay a finger on anyone, particularly someone you supposedly love. I'd have zero tolerance of this from BOTH genders. Disgusting behaviour.

Jimmy Bottlehead

My opinion would echo several others here - you feel happy to throw a slap / punch / kick / drink, you better be prepared to get one back.

Had a girl a few years ago throw the remnents of her drink at me for making a joke about something, so I felt very justified in throwing my almost full drink right over her. I can only assume she wouldn't be so quick to do it again.

Even with my girlfriend (who I love, and get along great with), there's been maybe 2 isolated incidents where she has been annoyed by something I've done and has punched me in the arm... I retaliated with the exact same thing (well, a less powerful punch to the arm) and after being very shocked and annoyed, she seen where I was coming from.
Usually, couples who have a fight will back down on an issue, but on this issue I refuse to as I'd never ever lift my hand to my girlfriend without being physically provoked, and expect the exact same thing of her.

I'll never be the first one to throw a dig at a guy or a girl, but once it's done to me all bets are off.