The craziest thing that's happened you on a nite out

Fago!

Posted these on a similar thread a while ago:

Long story short, in one night:

I had 8 bottles of Miller and 10 Jagar bombs, I joined and got banned from a casino, left myself a drunken memo (Via the gift of voicemail) to buy milk and to tell myself I'm cool and to "Never give up", danced with a hobo, vomited on myself, got kicked out of my mate's uncles house because his wife didn't like the cut of me, went home and woke up in my mam's pajamas.

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I remember I was in Q-Bar one night. I was dancing with this girl and was wearin' the face off her on the dancefloor. For some reason she just stopped. I thought nothing of it and put it down to my uglyness. My mate later danced with her too. She, again, abruptly pissed off!

Anywho, I woke up the next day hungover to bits. Checked my wallet to see the damage, there was no money. Not even the usual morning-after-the-night-before pocket full of change. I went out with 150, had like 8 drinks and came home with nothing? My keys, my library card and the back of my phone were gone too.

Called my mate, same thing happened to him. No loose change, no cards or keys.

Turns out the bitch robbed us while we were dancing. She must have been skilled to have dipped her hand in my pocket, into my wallet, took my money and change, keys and cards all while smackin her tongue down my throat.

cosanostra

After the nightclub one night i jumped on a bus assuming all buses at that time of night will take me home fell asleep and woke up at the toll bridge on the m1 heading into Dublin. It was the John McGinleys Donegal to Dublin service!

Nolanger

Went home after a club one night and stayed up watching a couple of DVDs. At about 7 AM the buzzer in the flat went off. Was too tired to see who it was but the lads in the next flat facing the street woke up and the next thing I heard was their shouting (after presumably looking out their window) 'they've got shotguns'! Got some strange looks from the landlord the following week!

jimthemental

Won a few hundred on the horses on Paddy's Day a few years ago. Woke up the following morning in Templetouhy. Gave up drink for a few months after that one.

Biggins

Biggins wrote: »

Started off on a night out in town (Louth) - ended up in London!

seanybiker wrote: »

My brother got pissed one night and ended up in Spain for a week. He was on his way to the airport and met some local one and ended up staying for a few more days. He didn't get in contact until after 4 days. I thought he was up in galway. He tends to head off on some mad ones at times.

Others here might be amazed how often things like that actually happen! :pac:
I used to disappear off for weeks!
Can't do it any more. Bummer!

MajorMax

f0ggy92 wrote: »

Went out for my leaving cert grad night a few weeks ago in Thurles.

I ended my night outside the petrol station waiting for our taxi home when some very drunk guy who shall remain nameless decides to strip almost bollick naked and chased me around the street while doing the party boy. I swear sometimes when i close my eyes I can feel it smacking off of my elbow again

STOP TOUCHING YOURSELF!!!

Adamantium

Seen a girl lose her finger in a well known student accomodation in Galway.... screaming, blood, a ****ing disaster basically!

Drunk fellas came pouring out from blocks, out looking for a finger in the grass,stumbling......."we can't find it, we searched everywhere" paramedic replies "thats because its on the fence"

Happy end though as she got it reattached!

Still get the shivers at the thought of it, so surreal!

flyingoutside

Woke up one night after a great time, loads of drink and that with my pants down and a really sore arse........wait a minute

spunkymunky

A couple of years back I was standing outside a club (as you do at the end of the night) and I noticed a girl walk straight out on to the road and just stand in front of traffic. Cars were beeping swerving around her. I ran out and grabbed and asked her what she was doing and she said was trying to kill herself!!! I eventually got her back on the path and got chatting to her. She was seriously depressed after her cousin dying and she wanted to join him!! She had a kid and all. There was not changing her mind!! So called the gardai, explained the situation to them and they tried to send her home in a taxi!!! She was dead set to kill herself and they wanted to send her home in a taxi!!! Anyways, I convinced them to take her home, which I assume they did (after being dicks to me!!)
Intense night!!
Was a meant to be situation as I remember walking into the pub and seeing her at the bar. I gave her a smile, which she returned!!

dodderangler

Bringing up an old thread but had to say this
Home from work half hour and feeling tired, the gf asleep upstairs and can't smoke in house so watched telly and felt tired so said I'd have a smoke outside
So Outside puffing away and seen my mate in his garden across the road so went over for two mins left front door open, finished the chat and as I got to my door I heard something jingle
Wasn't my keys so turned light on my phone and seen these two dirty green eyes starin at me
Fcukin horrible black cat and it started Hissin and spittin at me the way cats do
Gf is asleep and up at 7 so had to get it out as quietly as possible
10 mins chasin it thru the hall, sittin room, kitchen and babies playroom until it ran out the front door but not before it ran straight into it puttin a crack in the glass on front door
Scared the fcukin sh!t out of me
Blessed it wasn't a fox cuz there's loads in my estate and lucky I heard its bell cuz I was going straight upstairs to bed
Last time I leave my garden at night with door open

I also realise thread title is about nights out but this tops my nights out of craziest **** to happen t me

SusieBlue

Not me, but my boyfriend.

He went on a mystery tour a couple of months ago to Limerick, we live in Cork. Anyway, off he went in great spirits, getting absolutely shítfaced in the process.

At about 4am I got a phoncall from a guards station in Limerick saying my boyfriend was there and someone needed to come and get him.

Turns out he got so absolutely shítfaced he forgot he was in Limerick and not at home, got into a taxi, and gave the poor taxi man our address. The taxi man didn't have a clue where to go cause obviously our Cork address isn't in Limerick. After driving around for 15 minutes with boyfriend unable to give directions and the poor taxi man unable to figure out where in Limerick our house was, my boyfriend fell asleep in the taxi so the driver had no choice but to bring him to the guards station.

The guards said I could come and get him there and then, but I was super pissed off at being woken at 4am for my boyfriend doing something stupid, so I let him chill there over night before going down to collect him the next day.

He's an absolute idiot when he's after drinking. :rolleyes:

dodderangler

WhiteRoses wrote: »

He's an absolute idiot when he's after drinking. :rolleyes:

All us men in relationships are idiots when drinkin because we very rarely go out so catching up on lost weekends
Funny story tho op

hatrickpatrick

Met Amy Huberman in the chipper around the corner from Krystle on IFTAs night

Had had a row with my girlfriend that night and she's Amy's number one fan so it went from being a crappy night to the best night ever, and I went from being considered the biggest eejit in the world to being considered the biggest legend for convincing my girlfriend to wait with me while I got my bag of chips

IrishExpat

Started the weekends drinks on a Saturday night in Madrid city centre - following a bit of a blank I woke up Monday morning on a beach in Valencia.

I'd been adopted by a group of friendly Spaniards and Erasmus students after some lengthy drunk talk outside a bar. They were driving back the same day, so all's well that ends well.

Princess Evey Hammond

Sounds like an Epic night !!!!!!!

Chancer3001

Great first post.

bnt

I've only been to Cork once, for the Jazz Festival. While queueing to get in to one concert, some Langer in a car threw an egg at me. So far so normal, but ... the egg just bounced off me, without breaking. I wonder whether the twit boiled it first ..?

Pumpkinseeds

About 10 years ago, just after my husband and I moved to York, we went out on a Saturday night to check out the pub scene. We didn't really know what areas to avoid at that stage. Anyway we were having a drink in a busy pub and the atmosphere was getting a bit dodgy so we decided to leave, but first I needed to use the loo.

Off I went to the ladies and as soon as I'd walked a step or 2 in the door I was confronted by 3 charming(rough, skanky bitches) from Newcastle who were looking for a fight. I don't do physical fights or public slanging matches. I tried to ignore them but it was a fight or flight thing.

There was no way of getting out safely and there was nobody else there to ask for help. 1 of them came at me with a Newcastle brown ale bottle and I had to grab her smack her off a wall and use her as a shield to get out the door. I never saw them before or after, we found out later that it was called Micklegate street and is a rough area known as the Micklegate run. Never went up that way again. Scary bitches:eek:

I_smell_fear

Judging all stories on whether or not they'd get dumped off the Graham Norton red chair.

rainbowdrop

I once went to the shop for a litre of milk on a Friday evening, and arrived home the following Tuesday.

Lets just say, that weekend was like the movie Human Traffic only with a lot more drugs....

cuana

I still cringe at these memories I admit lots & lots of alcohol involved! Anyhow headed out with my buddy for a few drinks headed to a party ended up snogging my ex's friend (morto) scampered off very very quickly! At one point throughout the night I had swopped numbers with a fella who I had a crush on! On my drunken merry way home I got a text from an unknown number thinking it was my crush I was fcuken delighted!! So decided feck it a little fun invited him over when the door bell rang THERE WAS A COMPLETE FCUKEN STRANGER STANDING THERE................devastated I shut the door very quickly! I still cringe at the fact that I was so drunk at some point throughout the night I had very obviously chatted & given my number away to some random dude and to this day have no memory of it

IrishHomer

Woke up one Monday morning in a kids creche still pissed.

The girl i went back with owned a creche but i woke up on my tod in the kids playroom.

dinorebel

Some random bitch gave me her number so sent her a text later that night she sent back a very flirty text inviting me to her house.Rang the doorbell and she swore blind I was a complete stranger and that she'd never seen me before.

cuana

dinorebel wrote: »

Some random bitch gave me her number so sent her a text later that night she sent back a very flirty text inviting me to her house.Rang the doorbell and she swore blind I was a complete stranger and that she'd never seen me before.

Too funny!!

Larianne

Too many people here know me to tell!

Temptamperu

I woke up surrounded by an Asian family and they would not stop screaming.

ThunbergsAreGo

Mystery Bus tour back in the day. Bit of a black out and ended up walking the countryside around Carlow with one shoe on. Had myself convinced i was in Swords and i could walk home.

That was one expensive taxi!

strobe

Was out one morning at 3am with some lad from Clare or Lietrim or somewhere else that wasn't Dublin, can't remember where. He had a big mad beard on him and people called him "Jesus" because of it... Anyway... we were wandering around looking for a taxi after leaving some club thinking it'd be great if we could get some weed from somewhere. So Jesus, being an extroverted kind of guy, tapped on the window of a car that two twenty-something girls were sitting in. Rather than speed off at the sight of the drunkin bushy bearded notDubliner the girl in the driver seat, much to my surprise, wound down the window and asked what she could do for him in her Australian accent. An Australian accent was what was to be expected cause we were in Australia. I probably should have mentioned that... although it really has no relevance so maybe not...

Anyway, she asks what he wants and he says "Any weed around girls?" or words to that effect and she says "no, **** off" and winds back up the window.

So we start to walk away and she winds the window back down and says "we can get a bit of meth guys, if you have the money, fix us up for getting it for you". So naturally I think, "**** that" and start to walk away. But Jesus says "yeah, all right girls" and hops into the car.
Now I was farily drunk and maybe a couple of other things and one of the girls reminded me so so much of a slightly hotter and younger Sienna Miller so I figured I better go along with Jesus to make sure he was all right.

So we're driving along and after a minute the car pulls up at a payphone and the driver girl jumps out (no recollection of what she looked like other than she was fat and had collyflowered ears) and makes some call and we're on our way again. Driving along all chatting away and laughing and listening to music, when the pretty passenger girl pulls a bag of pills out from under her seat and starts handing them out like sweeties. Well I suppose myself and Jesus figured at this stage "in for a penny, in for a pound" and took one each. Then before I realise it (my eyes and attention being full of young Australian Sienna miller girl) we are driving down a middle of nowhere country road with no street lighting or any of that craic, god knows where. I'm half thinking "this is dodgy as ****" and half thinking "god she's so pretty and this seat is so smooth and soft and this is a great great song". But then we pull up to some house that appears in the headlights suddenly one second like a ****ing apparition.

So fat collyflower girl turns off the engine and says "ok guys, give us the money there and wait out here in the driveway and we'll drive on up to the house and pick up the stuff". To which Jesus, (who had either been completely quiet {which would be very out of character} the whole time, or perhaps I only had ears for passenger miller girl) pipes up and says "**** that! C'mon Strobe!" and hops out of the car and starts walking towards what I only presume he thought was the general direction of Perth city.

Without much of a conteneder for a plan B I hoped out and did the same. We got about 60 seconds down the road when the car came screaming down after us and nearly mowed the two of us over. Then the girls jumped out and fatty runs up and punches Jesus square in the jaw. He didn't really see this coming and was floored for a second. So your one is standing there over him then shouting "gimme the ****ing money!" and doing a little kind of half dance thing. Jesus scrambles to his feet, throws his arms out wide and shouts "peace and love sweetheart!". So she smacks him again.

Sieanna had gotten out of the car, and was now over beside me politely asking "c'mon, give me the money there and we'll both drive up to the house". Now I hadn't a penny on me even if I'd have wanted to give her something... come to think of it I don't think Jesus had much if anything either as we had spoken of one of us staying with the taxi driver while the other went inside to get the fair when we got back to where we were staying.

So I do the first thing that comes to my mind, I drag Miller to the ground and hop into the car. Struggle to figure out how to put the automatic gear lever into reverse, finally get it and reverse back up to where Jesus has taken on a kind of slick boxing stance and is keeping his distance from Fatty Wierd Ears. I stop and he scrambles in the back window despite the passenger door hanging open for him, and I drive off into the darkness, reach the road and keep driving till I finally hit the city again. We dump the car and walk back to the digs without saying a word.

But... would have been some story if I'd have banged the Sienna Miller one while high on meth.

uberalles

Went out out drinking in Dublin and woke up in New Zealand on a beach the next day.

redtapestyl

Drank so much one night I actually woke up the next morning on the moon. Must have bought one of those space tourist packages or something. Was one expensive trip home I'll tell you that!