All ye oul wans and oul fellas out there! Wakey wakey, rise and shine!

Rubecula

Wonder if they would be thick enough to respond lol

BrensBenz

Chucken wrote: »

Dear Customer,
Few days ago we informed you that we started to upgradde our databse to fetch the new security updates and as you might noticed our web site was offline for some of you today.

After the upgrade we lost sensitive information of users accounts.
If you receive this email that means you need to update your billign and payment information, make sure they are correct and equivalent to information on your billing files.

Other way to update your information, you can send us a photo proof of your billing information and a photo of both sides of your credit card.
We will update the account manually and this will take 48 hours.
Please reply to this email to send the files.

Isn't it a little early for April Fools? Hello........Anyone there? Oh, you're all busy photographing both sides of your credit cards.

I don't know whether to get my camera out now or finish my message to the prince of Nigeria first. There's just about enough room in my boatshed for half a ton of gold bullion........whoooooops, I didn't tell yiz that....

Saunters off, hands in pockets, whistling a merry tune and inspecting the clouds.

Kalman

Ah, sure take two, if you want one.:P

Jellybaby1

Sad thing is, some folk will actually fall for that.

BrensBenz

For Oul Fellas only - no peeking from the Oul Wans:

Lads, as you know, I have devoted much of my life experimenting with ways to establish / increase my attractiveness to female type people. Well, I think I've finally cracked it! Forget film star looks, romantic gestures, career prospects, grooming, convertible cars, sense of humour, being good to your Mammy, etc., etc. Here it is, the secret of irresistibility............

Well, the Woof had to go to the vet to have his bandage removed. So there he was in the waiting area, all sad and dejected, huge bald patch, limping heavily, banging his bonnet into the furniture. Naturally, I had pre-scanned the area in detail and had noticed two super models (well, possibly the mammies of two super models, one Irish and one Eastern European) who took one look at Woof and immediately descended on me, holding onto my upper arm, gazing into my bloodshot eyes and offering all sorts of advice about sick woofers. I had been dreading this trip to the vet but found myself becoming very religious, thanking any deity who would listen.

Then, all too soon, the vet arrived and remarked that, because of Woof's temper, he would need assistance to remove the bandage. He called his student, his lady-type student, his seven foot tall, green-eyed, flame-haired student, whose face lit up when she smiled. She spoke to me with a soft, deep voice that came from somewhere around her knees. By this time, even the Woof was enchanted. The bandage was removed without a sedative and with barely a growl. He even allowed some minor physio.

So chaps, get yourselves a sick dog, preferably with a day-glo bandage, a lampshade and sad eyes.

You're welcome.

Jellybaby1

Mrs Brens and I enjoyed a cup of tea together this morning. If Mr. Brens is thinking of returning home from the vet's today, he would be well advised not to. :rolleyes:

BrensBenz

Jellybaby1 wrote: »

Mrs Brens and I enjoyed a cup of tea together this morning. If Mr. Brens is thinking of returning home from the vet's today, he would be well advised not to. :rolleyes:

You.....you.....read my "Oul Fellas Only" post??? Ya divil ya.

Anyway, I've spent countless hours in art galleries all over the world but never ran off with any of the exhibits.

Next vets visit is 23 March. Yippeeee. Ho hum.......sigh.

Layinghen

Sorry Brens had a peek as well:p

The Rooster in this henhouse agrees with you totally regarding the effects a cute woof has on random female persons he happens to bump into on his walk with the hound.

Funny how I walk her on the beach all winter, no delays, quick hello to any other lunatic out in the howling Atlantic wind. Come the balmy days of summer, when the sun is high and the beach is full of scantily clad visitors, dog and Rooster are on the missing list for hours.

Their record is 5 hours missing in action, they met so many people who just had to be greeted by both of them!!!!!!!!!

BrensBenz

Layinghen wrote: »

The Rooster in this henhouse agrees with you totally regarding the effects a cute woof has on random female persons he happens to bump into on his walk with the hound.

Oh drat and double drat! I thought I had discovered something completely new. Silver medal instead of gold and hats off to "Rooster".

Hmmm, I wonder if I could start a business, renting injured woofers to sad and lonely oul fellas. www.duffwoofs4U.ie? I hope Rooster hasn't beaten me to that too!

Layinghen

Nah, work away Brens, the field is clear for your business idea.


The Rooster would hate competition on his route:D:D:D

BrensBenz

Well, all talk here is about the solar eclipse - saw it / couldn't see it / the whawww?

I caught a glimpse before the clouds closed in but what never ceases to amaze me is the fact that someone can figure all this stuff out, with unfailing accuracy and reliability. Yes, I hear yiz all saying that compewhers do it but eclipses have been forecast for yonks before compewhers. I was fairly good at sums in school but I wouldn't know where to start to calculate a solar eclipse, exactly where and when visible, to the minute, and decades before it happens.

I wonder if the person who actually does the sums ever thinks about working for the Met Office instead.

Jellybaby1

On St. Patrick's Day we went for a walkie in Glendalough. Heather came too. It was a lovely day. We popped into the Visitor Centre. Unfortunately Heather embarrassed us something awful. Can't bring her anywhere.

looksee

What a beautiful day today, warm and springlike. Got loads of 'gardening' done (not so much gardening as clearing a winter's accumulation of all sorts of random rubbish from the garden!)

Rubecula

looksee wrote: »

What a beautiful day today, warm and springlike. Got loads of 'gardening' done (not so much gardening as clearing a winter's accumulation of all sorts of random rubbish from the garden!)

And even better yet, 6 nation's was fantastic

Layinghen

Brilliant day of rugby. Roll on the World Cup.

looksee

Layinghen wrote: »

Brilliant day of rugby. Roll on the World Cup.

Ah right! That's why I kept hearing national anthems from the other room.:P

Rubecula

Layinghen wrote: »

Brilliant day of rugby. Roll on the World Cup.

This is true

OldGoat

Oooh, double rainbow. Nice cheerful view, a break from the usual dullness of the office window.

BrensBenz

Need a little favour from yiz: See, there's a vacancy in a car programme on BBC TV and I've applied. My CV includes Os&Os as referees so you might get a call from BBC's HR Department sometime soon.

They're looking for a loud, ugly, bigoted, self-obsessed, opinionated, WW2 obsessed, xenophobic, misogynistic, bullying lout, preferably with beige teeth and velcro hair, who can drive cars sideways. With the possible exception of misogyny, I satisfy these requirements in all areas. In fact, I might be slightly over-qualified. So, if they call you, all you have to do is tell them how perfectly I fit the profile.

OK?

Many Thanks.

Layinghen

If you promise to love Jaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaags the same way as the last occupant I'll sing your praises to them:)

Jellybaby1

I might have applied myself but being a girl I just know they wouldn't let me anywhere near one of their mo-mo's!

Rubecula

Jellybaby1 wrote: »

I might have applied myself but being a girl I just know they wouldn't let me anywhere near one of their mo-mo's!

Jody Kidd presents "Chasing Classic Cars"

BrensBenz

Rubecula wrote: »

Jody Kidd presents "Chasing Classic Cars"

And.......Jodie Kidd can really drive a car!

Unlike "Top Gear", "Chasing Classic Cars" is actually about cars (as opposed to a weekly bickering session between presenters) but, having perfected recording and fast forwarding through the tedious bits of "Top Gear", I now find this skill useful on CCC too because the other presenter on CCC, Quentin Willson, speaks so............slowly that..........I...........lose patience waiting...............for him..............to.............finish every............sentence. Perhaps he's..........flirting with.......Ms. Kidd...........or...........camera-hogging but.............it's............really annoying.

Anyway, now that I'm ready to return to the ranks of the employed, do yiz think I should apply for the job in One Direction, i.e. a fairly well-known(?) musical combo? Apparently, they're fabbalus but they don't have a ukulele player. Yet!

PS: Woof had his check-up today at the vets. All good - so good that his bonnet can come off. BEFORE bonnet removal, three lady-type people in the waiting area engaged me in conversation. AFTER bonnet removal, NONE, i.e. not any approaches. I'm keeping the bonnet - it might be useful sometime.

Jellybaby1

BrensBenz wrote: »

.......I'm keeping the bonnet - it might be useful sometime.

Perhaps if you don the bonnet yourself Brens.......after all, Easter is coming and you will need a bonnet!

Rubecula

Pity you mentioned employment BB. It is a sore point with me just now. Allow me to explain:

A couple of years ago (2013) I took ill with a pretty bad condition. Bybad I mean I am still counting my blessings at being an Oulfella.

Anyway I was unable to return to work for some time (Lots and lots of surgery) BUT despite being told it could take up to 5 years to return to work, (And here I feel really proud of myself and my stubborn attitude) I was able to return to work within a year. Sadly, I was not able (physically) to return to my normal duties BUT I did my best. AND I still am. However it is not enough for my boss. He sent me to the company doctor for a second opinion last week. He was upset when the doctor confirmed in writing what I had told him. So upset in fact he called a meeting to which I was invited yesterday. Present were himself, The Personnel Manager and the company nurse. (Plus me of course) The upshot of all this was I either took a pay cut and a demotion (I can not do my job at a lower grade) OR I will be taken to a disciplinary hearing where they will arrange for me to be sacked.

I have worked there with NO complaints and plenty of compliments for 20 years I have been in the industry for 40 years. Iam not the best in the business but I am pretty damned good. Good enough to be one of only 6 in the entire world who was qualified to do the job a couple of years ago.

And now I have the heartbreaking choice on whether to apply for a lower paid lower grade jobor wait to be sacked, which at my age and medical history would be the end!

On the good side though, it was sunny today

looksee

Ah Rube, that's a bummer. I'm so sorry you have had that kind of treatment, its a bit of a kick in the teeth after all the stuff that has been going on. I'd love to be able to say something useful, but all I can do is send sympathy and hope that something a bit more positive comes out of it. All the best and keep on fighting!

Rubecula

Aww thanks hon. Not sure why I posted it to be honest you folks don't need to hear my problems.


Sorry

looksee

Rubecula wrote: »

Aww thanks hon. Not sure why I posted it to be honest you folks don't need to hear my problems.


Sorry

Don't be sorry, sometimes you have to talk or bust! There is a 'support thread' somewhere down the list if you want to talk there without feeling you are putting a downer on the OT thread, but going there initially could feel a bit clinical. If anyone can cope Rube, its you, but feel free to grouse if it helps

Jellybaby1

Aw bloody hell! What a way to treat a person like yourself Rube. After all these years I have learned such a lot about people, and employers in particular. They feel they can treat people like XXXX!!!! Really sorry you find yourself in this position Rube after everything you've been experiencing. I know you'll get through somehow but it really is crappy of them. 'Scuse my French! (Yiz know I don't usually swear!)

Layinghen

Rube, that is an appalling way you have been treated. Are you a member of an Union? If so you need to make contact with them straight away and not just the local union rep but with the main office where they have access to experts in this type of situation.

Not sure about legislation on your side of the pond but as we are all EU members think it should be fairly similar to what we have here, anyway there is a lot of protection out there against discrimination on grounds of 'disability' (don't like that word). Your Union would have info on this or failing that citizens advice might be able to guide you in the right direction.

The last thing I can think of is for you to check out your pension scheme to see if there is an arrangement under it for early retirement on grounds of ill health - this is probably not what you want but the most important thing is to make sure you have an income coming in, if they are anxious to get rid of you.

Treating a long term employee like this is disgraceful but you have to meet it head on and protect yourself and your income.