What is fate? Does it exist?

ilovebiology

Ladies,
Has anyone had any incidences of "Fate" be it with a man or a woman? I would love a discussion on this, and to get your opinions. A man from my past keeps coming up, and appearing in my life. Anytime I am not thinking about him/am over him, something about him appears, and he ends up back on my mind again. Its driving me nuts!

Have any of you ladies experienced anything like this, or have an opinion as to why this is happening to me?

If I am in the wrong forum, let me know, or transfer this thread. Thanks

coffee_cake

Lots of coincidence, it's a small world

Acoshla

Not just with man/woman relationships, but I do believe in fate, I have had some things happen to me that are just too strange to be coincidences, specifically a lucky number that crops up a lot for me in positive ways, and in the people I've met and the way things have happened so far in my life.

I know a lot of things are just coincidence, but I definitely think there's more to some things than coincidence.

ilovebiology

I have had a stream of coincidences with this person, from the first time we got chatting. When I met him in person it was like electricity went through me, I was instantly attracted, and we got on really well. Things changed, he is no longer in my life. The past while I haven't been thinking about him, and now again, he has re entered my life in a strange way again.
What do you think? Its really odd, and hasn't happened before. Has anything like this happened to any of you?

TheNewMee

I once read a book that dealt with the subject of coincidences pretty well. The problem is that "improbable event happening" is much more noticeable than "improbable event not happening" so we put a lot more emphasis on the coincidences we see without thinking about all of the ones that didn't happen.
In short, no, fate does not exist.

Asphyxia

I like to keep and open mind on things so I do believe in it as Spadina said I've had too many weird coincidences happening sometimes. I like to think some things happen for reasons because it makes me keep positives in bad situations

Acoshla

The series of events that have happened me with my lucky number have freaked out the most level headed people I know, I didn't quite believe how weird it was until they said it.

But OP as my Grandad says what's for you won't pass by you, so if you and this person keep cropping up in each other's lives then maybe it's for reason, but at the same time from the other point of view maybe it means nothing at all but you might as well give it a shot, barring any major reasons not to.

ilovebiology

Spadina wrote: »

The series of events that have happened me with my lucky number have freaked out the most level headed people I know, I didn't quite believe how weird it was until they said it.

But OP as my Grandad says what's for you won't pass by you, so if you and this person keep cropping up in each other's lives then maybe it's for reason, but at the same time from the other point of view maybe it means nothing at all but you might as well give it a shot, barring any major reasons not to.

Thanks Spadina. Its freaking me out this evening, as he was out of my mind for a while. I joined a website, and who was there, he was. Its odd!

jellie

ilovebiology wrote: »

Thanks Spadina. Its freaking me out this evening, as he was out of my mind for a while. I joined a website, and who was there, he was. Its odd!

with websites if you have any connections in common or email addresses in your email contacts and things like that its not necessarily a coincidence but the internet knowing too much about you. Obviously it depends on the website etc., but ive had similar before, like creating a youtube account and getting suggested videos uploaded by my ex because he was in my gmail contacts - not a coincidence, google trying to be clever.

mood

If it's a dating site is just means you are both single and looking to meet someone. That's not fate IMO.

ilovebiology

jellie wrote: »

with websites if you have any connections in common or email addresses in your email contacts and things like that its not necessarily a coincidence but the internet knowing too much about you. Obviously it depends on the website etc., but ive had similar before, like creating a youtube account and getting suggested videos uploaded by my ex because he was in my gmail contacts - not a coincidence, google trying to be clever.

No, its nothing like this at all. I have nothing on the internet, and there is no way I knew he was there, and he had no idea I was there. Its pure coincidence, and odd

Ickle Magoo

I don't think there is any such thing as fate - we notice certain people more than others. There are many occasions when people we know happen into our lives or our paths cross but unless we put any importance on them, we tend not to notice. If it's someone we really like then I think we look harder for them and place more emphasis on any random coincidence because we'd really love for there to be some cosmic reason for it happening that will eventually mean us getting what we want - but I think it more wishful thinking than fate. :cool:

Giselle

Fate, like luck, is a more exciting way to explain the very random machinations of coincidence.

No, I don't believe in it. If we look for things, we see them. Even if we don't realise we're looking.

Gerry Manderer

Spadina wrote: »

But OP as my Grandad says what's for you won't pass by you, so if you and this person keep cropping up in each other's lives then maybe it's for reason, but at the same time from the other point of view maybe it means nothing at all but you might as well give it a shot, barring any major reasons not to.

I've never bought into this fallacy that there is some master plan that you are somehow "guided" along for your eternal benefit. Things that may be "for you" (whatever that actually means) do and will pass you by. That's the harsh reality of life

I think people take comfort in believing that some things were "meant/not meant to be", in a sense it absolves them of personal responsibility for things turning out in certain ways or a reality which they find hard to accept

Acoshla

Gerry Manderer wrote: »

I think people take comfort in believing that some things were "meant/not meant to be", in a sense it absolves them of personal responsibility for things turning out in certain ways or a reality which they find hard to accept

So what if it helps them? People believe in all sorts (religion being the first thing to comes to mind) to help them deal with life.

TheNewMee

Spadina wrote: »

So what if it helps them? People believe in all sorts (religion being the first thing to comes to mind) to help them deal with life.

The problem is that buying into the whole "what's for you won't pass you by" thing can lead to people not taking opportunities that present themselves because they believe that even if they don't take the risk at that point it'll still work out in the end.

Gerry Manderer

Spadina wrote: »

So what if it helps them? People believe in all sorts (religion being the first thing to comes to mind) to help them deal with life.

Yeah if it helps them, fine, but in answer to the question of whether the concept of fate actually exists, no I don't believe there is such thing as fate

Giselle

Spadina wrote: »

So what if it helps them? People believe in all sorts (religion being the first thing to comes to mind) to help them deal with life.

Believing in lies or illusions prevents people from dealing with the realities, and thats the only way to really get a grip on life.

The only purpose it serves is to delude people into believing they have control over things they don't, by praying for example.

Thats not dealing with life, its hiding from the truth.

Acoshla

Ok so by liking the idea of fate some bit I'm deluding myself and not dealing with life. It is possible to have some belief in fate but also have the maturity and the general cop on to know that you can't just sit back and wait for things to be handed to you and them blame "a higher power" when things go wrong.

I don't mean that I think every single thing in life is due to fate and not actual decisions but I do think that some things are, or might be, sure who are any of us to say for definite what happens.

But I do like how this so quickly went from a light hearted thread to those who believe in fate being dillusional and hiding from the truth. :rolleyes:

Giselle

Calm down:)

My reply was just in response to this:

Spadina wrote: »

So what if it helps them? People believe in all sorts (religion being the first thing to comes to mind) to help them deal with life.

You're reading too much into it.:)

IrishEyes19

TheNewMee wrote: »

I once read a book that dealt with the subject of coincidences pretty well. The problem is that "improbable event happening" is much more noticeable than "improbable event not happening" so we put a lot more emphasis on the coincidences we see without thinking about all of the ones that didn't happen.
In short, no, fate does not exist.

I think it would be nice for once in a while instead of throwing a hell of a lot of scientific logic and reasoning at something which is the new faze these days, that nothing sweet or slightly mystical could happen, maybe people could let go and maybe give "possibility" and "fate" a chance too.

TheNewMee

IrishEyes19 wrote: »

I think it would be nice for once in a while instead of throwing a hell of a lot of scientific logic and reasoning at something which is the new faze these days, that nothing sweet or slightly mystical could happen, maybe people could let go and maybe give "possibility" and "fate" a chance too.

Yes how dare people throw logic and reasoning at something, it must surely be a faze :rolleyes:

krudler

Giselle wrote: »

Believing in lies or illusions prevents people from dealing with the realities, and thats the only way to really get a grip on life.

The only purpose it serves is to delude people into believing they have control over things they don't, by praying for example.

Thats not dealing with life, its hiding from the truth.

I saw a demotivational poster once that said something like "praying: how to think you're doing something while doing absolutely nothing" and that sums it up perfectly. I hate when people say things like "please god I'll get that job" whatd god got to do with it? surely a higher being has better things to do than interfere in your cv?

kerryman12

These numbers you speak of;

[specifically a lucky number that crops up a lot for me in positive ways/QUOTE]

The series of events that have happened me with my lucky number have freaked out the most level headed people I know

are they; 4/8/15/16/23/42 - if so I would advise against any flights across the pacific!

Sorry, couldnt resist that one.

Ilovebiology in your case I would think that because this person is on your mind a lot you are making these connections where they dont really exisit.

As for fate in general, I dont really buy that.

Grasshoppa

I'm aware of the explanations for the seeming existence of fate; apophenia, confirmation bias, self-fulfilling prophecies etc, and thus the unlikelihood of fate existing, yet I'm still drawn to the romantic notion that it does.

cdaly_

Spadina wrote: »

The series of events that have happened me with my lucky number have freaked out the most level headed people I know, I didn't quite believe how weird it was until they said it.

Have you considered how many events that have happened to you with other numbers? Or do you just not notice those?

metrovelvet

I don't equate coincidence with destiny. Destiny is a whole other concept, which can range from Calvinistic pre-determinism, to the Shakespearean character as destiny, to Jungian archetypes and paradigms, to psychiatric diagnosis, to self fulfilling prophecies.

IrishEyes19

TheNewMee wrote: »

Yes how dare people throw logic and reasoning at something, it must surely be a faze :rolleyes:

Your sarcasm is hillarious, "thenewmee," :rolleyes:

I was just making the point, not everything has to be so serious!! I apologise if my post didn't click well with you :rolleyes: but theres nothing wrong either with believing in fate.

Giselle

IrishEyes19 wrote: »

Your sarcasm is hillarious, "thenewmee," :rolleyes:

I was just making the point, not everything has to be so serious!! I apologise if my post didn't click well with you :rolleyes: but theres nothing wrong either with believing in fate.

Nothing wrong with it in the same way as theres nothing wrong with believing in faeries or angels or unicorns, but that still doesn't make it true or reasonable.

Which is more important, to believe in something because its true, or believe in something because its nice?

metrovelvet

Do you believe in imaginary numbers?

Red Hand

metrovelvet wrote: »

Do you believe in imaginary numbers?

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