Boards.ie guide to stereotyping cars

mondeo

I had BMW's for 26 years and I never knew they were RWD until my main dealer told me after I paid him 150 euro to change my wiper blades.

stevenmu

Fiat Panto: Suffers from terrible head gasket problems.

"Oh no it doesn't!"

"Oh yes it does!"

...

...

etc...

Boskowski

Stevie Dakota wrote: »

Toyota - Kill me now styling but reliable in between recalls, and they change your engine without telling you when servicing it.

slightly OT but strangely enough I just read about a new worldwide recall. Something about fuelpipes.

EPM

Covered here.

http://m.boards.ie/vbulletin/showthread.php?p=70290285#post70290285

Padraig Mor

5 litre luxobarges are actually really cheap to run - much more so than a 1 litre supermini. And they are in no way prone to eye wateringly expensive repair bills or an insatiable thirst for fuel and tyres.

pajo1981

People who call road tax, motor tax are being pedantic.

Civic drivers are knackers, whereas Teg drivers are enthusiasts.

shogunpower

i have the mechanical knowledge of gay byrne, what car should i get,

inevitable answer: alfo romeo or tvr, because they are really reliable:rolleyes:

opinion guy

Gay Byrne knows how to solve the problem of deaths on our roads.

Leonard Hofstadter

The VW 1.9 TDI regularly out performs 535ds, Evo 8s and Impreza turbos. It eats them all for breakfast and does 100 mpg while it's at it.

If you're not content with merely outdoing these cars, then there is a quick and easy solution. Go to your VW dealer, which will supply you with a TDI badge and now your TDI will be quicker than a Lamborghini Gallardo. That is a FACT.

For just a little more you can buy a TDI badges, but you really need to be careful now, because even a Veyron cannot keep up with a VW TDI. TDI's are the quickest cars in the world. FACT:pac:.

Fey!

All BMWs are pointless because their about to bcum FWD.

Da head gasket on a Freelander will melt b4 you drive it out of the garage, and has absolutely notin 2 do wit the driver not ev-er checking the water level in it.

I is a mecanic, specalising in tires an breaks.

The Skoda Suberb is the ultimate answer to everyones car needs.

They're driving lights, not foglights, despite them coming on at ALL times instead of just with main beams!

(spelling & txtspk are on purpose to illustrate points).

OP; great thread!

opinion guy

There is a car abandoned outside my house - can I take ownership ? Its got one wheel on my driveway.

The neighbours left it there ages ago. I can only assume that they have left the country. They all got into a taxi with some bags and some skis. One of them said see you next week but its been 8 days now, so I can only assume they are not coming back.

I was wondering since its clearly abandoned forever, and it has a wheel on my driveway, surely I must be entitled to some sort of ownership or squatters rights. How do I go about claiming ownership and get a new VLC. Its a BMW M3 by the way.

Skoda vRS drivers are motor enthusiasts who are subsidised by posers who drive VW GTis :pac:

R.O.R

RoverJames wrote: »

Skoda vRS drivers are motor enthusiasts who are subsidised by posers who drive VW GTis :pac:

Hold on - I thought this thread was for outrageous lies, rather than the truth?

(remember, there is now a mod to back this up )

hplp

Fey! wrote: »

Da head gasket on a Freelander will melt b4 you drive it out of the garage, and has absolutely notin 2 do wit the driver not ev-er checking the water level in it.

This is brilliant! Could be applied to everything too!

BlackWizard

Old Japanese car with the seat leaning back means a scumbag criminal drives it.

Big Nasty

Driving wearing a hoodie (up) will not impair my hearing or vision in any shape or form and makes me look posh behind the wheel of my civic.

HAMMERCURRENT

Cade Happy Advisor wrote: »

The car I currenty own is the best and anyone with a lesser car then me is a joke and anyone with a better car is wasting money and is pointless on Irish roads.

I have never driven that car but i have an opinion and it is that of top gear.[/B]

Totally agree.

Mr.David

One that gets me:

"I know that all the major tyre manufacturers recommend putting the fresher tyres on the rear rather than the front of the vehicle and that there are numerous tests to demonstrate why.

But I think this is advice for "ordinary" motorists who are but passengers in their own vehicles. I on the other hand could embarrass Schumacher with my incredible car control and as such can make a vehicle perform better with the better tyres on the front. Fact."
:rolleyes:

Voodoomelon

For sale. Honda Civic partially emerged in my local river.

kyote00

I know absolutely nothing about cars (or any mechanical or electrical device) but I regularly give advice on the boards motors forum....

dr.fuzzenstein

Alfas are proper cars for real petrolheads, this is despite, or even because they will fall to pieces, have rustholes the size of your fist within 6 months and none of the electrics ever work

Renaults are pointless sh*te cars, strangely enough for pretty much the same reasons

Mercs have all the mechanical and electrical maladies, but at least won't rust (much). But they're expensive, that makes them better.

BMW's have built in right of way. It's a little black box under the bonnet and comes as standard with all beemers.

Fords are still brilliant, simply the best cars you can buy, the best value, most reliable and fastest and cheapest to run, this has nothing to do with the fact that I drive one...:D

Micras have been designed by octogenarians for octogenarians

(According to Top Gear) all British cars are brilliant despite being designed and build in a shed for 6 pence and a cup of tea.
German cars are boring and sh*te because they are built in proper factories and where designed by proper engineers for millions.
(love TG but Jezza can be a prat)

All Korean cars are better because they are cheaper and you get another grand off if you scrap your perfectly good car for less than it's worth for a pointless tin box that will be worth 5 cent in 6 months time. (Wait, is that a cliché?)

johnos1984

Here is a fresh live wire taken from this thread in which someone wants buying advice about getting a Passat

Hi guys i have a problem here my car will not move in reverse or forward (obv handbreak is down) .. the thing is i have last started it back in september. And today it wont even move! any 1 with an idea what might be causing this?
cheers

http://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/showthread.php?p=70302094&utm_source=notification&utm_medium=email&utm_campaign=notify#post70302094

Mc Love

Anyone know anything about PF auto's?

cjmcork

loving this thread peeps!:p

Bigus

Boards on PRius

Don't buy a prius because they're

so so complicated the batteries cost 8k and need to be replaced every year!

You need a nerd with a computer degree to look under the bonnet.

and they really only do 20 mpg in the real world. A skoda driving taximan told me.

and they'll infect all the other cars in Ireland specially the fast ones.

Not a lot of people know this but they're probably the least eco friendly cars on the planet (a hummer was scientifically proven by GM to be more eco friendly)

and FFS you can't even get a manual one (real driver's wouldn't even consider an AUTO).


No listen to me, and buy a three cylinder diesel Fabia ,bigger ,faster, and more street cred then a PIOUS cos at least the Fabia has a Turbo.

and if you want an auto learn how to drive !

shogunpower

Bigus wrote: »

Boards on PRius

Don't buy a prius because they're

so so complicated the batteries cost 8k and need to be replaced every year!

You need a nerd with a computer degree to look under the bonnet.

and they really only do 20 mpg in the real world. A skoda driving taximan told me.

and they'll infect all the other cars in Ireland specially the fast ones.

Not a lot of people know this but they're probably the least eco friendly cars on the planet (a hummer was scientifically proven by GM to be more eco friendly)

and FFS you can't even get a manual one (real driver's wouldn't even consider an AUTO).


No listen to me, and buy a three cylinder diesel Fabia ,bigger ,faster, and more street cred then a PIOUS cos at least the Fabia has a Turbo.

and if you want an auto learn how to drive !

but but but some of those statements have an element of truth:cool:

Bigus

shogunpower wrote: »

but but but some of those statements have an element of truth:cool:

Go on ?

shogunpower

Bigus wrote: »

Boards on PRius

Don't buy a prius because they're

so so complicated the batteries cost 8k and need to be replaced every year!

You need a nerd with a computer degree to look under the bonnet.

and they really only do 20 mpg in the real world. A skoda driving taximan told me.

and they'll infect all the other cars in Ireland specially the fast ones.

Not a lot of people know this but they're probably the least eco friendly cars on the planet (a hummer was scientifically proven by GM to be more eco friendly)

and FFS you can't even get a manual one (real driver's wouldn't even consider an AUTO).


No listen to me, and buy a three cylinder diesel Fabia ,bigger ,faster, and more street cred then a PIOUS cos at least the Fabia has a Turbo.

and if you want an auto learn how to drive !

a lump hammer and 13 spanner won't do ya underneath the bonnet,

wasn't it proved that the damage to the environment mining nickle for the batteries is huge? and out weighs the good it does to the environment?from dust to dust i mean.

motor enthusiast's shiver at the thought of an automatic coupled to a 1.6, don't tell me otherwise.autos suit 2.5+ engines end of.

and finally the likes of the passat blue motion and BMW's 316d hammer the prius in every single imaginable way.

Bigus

shogunpower wrote: »

a lump hammer and 13 spanner won't do ya underneath the bonnet,

wasn't it proved that the damage to the environment mining nickle for the batteries is huge? and out weighs the good it does to the environment?from dust to dust i mean.

motor enthusiast's shiver at the thought of an automatic coupled to a 1.6, don't tell me otherwise.autos suit 2.5+ engines end of.

and finally the likes of the passat blue motion and BMW's 316d hammer the prius in every single imaginable way.

No mention of Octavia ?

shogunpower

Bigus wrote: »

No mention of Octavia ?

Octavia's are simply better with manual boxes. better mpg, better driving experience etc.unless your 90 and want driving to be as easy/lazy as possible or your american and can't drive a manual.