What irritates you most about your closest friends!

Mashyling

Is there such thing as a best friend? We chop and change friendships, best friends and other relationships throughout our lives. People grow out of friendships and move on. Is there anything that really annoys you about your friends. Are they inconsiderate, annoying. Does moving in with friends change how you feel about them? Tell All!! What do you guys think?;)

Nervous Wreck

I don't get to see them nearly as often as I'd like to.

barleybooley

One of my best friends can have the biggest heart but can also be the biggest b*tch.

She never likes any of our bfs and always tries to offer poor relationship advice and tries to push it even thought she's never been in a relationship. She can be very judgemental of what you're wearing and thinks that she's a serious fashionista (she's really not). She would say stuff like "she was so big, about your size or maybe a bit smaller" and I know I'm carrying some weight but I'm a 16 ffs! She gets thick over the smallest thing and she's quite immature compared to the rest of us despite being 3 weeks younger than me. She's obsessed with maintaining friendships with people that clearly have no interest and insists on going to the world and its mother's 21st.

She can just be so bitchy and nasty but then she can turn around and show that she has a heart of gold, it's like she's two personalities.

The_Morrigan

oh when they are all talk about their new BF and going into all the details, forgetting in their excitment you've just had your heart broken.
Its not intentional on their part, as they are very supportive and all about the "getting back out there" - but I really don't want to hear about all the rosemantic things their new beau is up too...

tough__cookie

I hate when they stop making an effort to meet up / ring you and then your the one doing all the ringing and trying to meet up with them. :mad:

That's exactly why I don't hang around with them anymore, you can only do so much.

Lia_lia

Well I'm not saying anything on here. As I know a few of my friends in real life are on boards. Not that I have ANYTHING bad to say :P

stick_figure

I have a friend who can't make a decision to save her life. Everything is "I don't mind, I'm easy, I'll do anything, I don't mind, I don't mind, I don't mind, I don't mind". I didn't ask to be the captain of your ship - grow a spine and make a decision already!!!

Indecision really grates on me, in case you hadn't noticed

pinkpigs

Love my b.f. to bits but lately she is really full on and she thinks that she is always right. I've had to make a lot of tough choices and while I am the one who has to live with them if they go t*its up she loves saying 'I told you so'. Normally I would give as good as I get but I feel very worn down at the mo and couldn't fight my way out of a paper bag. Why do some people have to be opinionated??

P.P

tough__cookie

Oh I just thought of another one, the friend who never puts their hand in their pocket!!!:mad:

Its never her round!! It annoys me even more then when I see her taking drinks from friends of friends that she doesnt know and then never buys one back. This is the kind of girl who comes to a party with her hands empty. I mean supplying the grub is grand but come on like, bring a bottle of wine or something!! Or if you're sharing a taxi she always only has a 50!! ALWAYS!!!

Kitty-kitty

Let's not forget the friend, ladies, who's a size eight and constantly complains that she's SO FAT, generally to her plus-size friends. Yeah, love, it must be so hard for you, what with your size constantly on sale everywhere.

Oh! Or the one who borrows your clothes and then gets upset because they don't fit. "I'm even more fat than YOU!" I'm sorry?

tough__cookie

Or the friend who actually is a lot fatter than you but makes out that you're the fat one :mad:

Kitty-kitty

YES. This is the same friend who squeezes herself into your clothes, stretches them out, probably claims you're the same size and not so privately thinks she's smaller.

Giselle

Dealing with their drunkenness on a night out.

Too many assumptions are made about non-drinkers being happy to be sensible, but many times I'd have liked to leave them to it and go home but as the only sober one I feel too responsible.:(

Other than that, the ones who gossip all night about people you don't even know, and expect you to show actual interest. I. Don't. Care.

And the drama queens who complain about being treated badly by people they allow to treat them badly. If he's that bad, walk away. Don't expect me to listen to the same story every week when you know the cure!

Oh, and the ones who go out and spend all night checking out who's looking at them. The night is usually one long pose.

I've had a bad weekend, sorry for the rant .

tough__cookie

Kitty-kitty wrote: »

YES. This is the same friend who squeezes herself into your clothes, stretches them out, probably claims you're the same size and not so privately thinks she's smaller.

oh my god oh my god do we have the same friend!!!! thats her!!!!!! :eek:

pollypocket10

When they don't realise that I am ALWAYS right, like always, they should know by now :rolleyes:

rebel10

I have great friends, but there are quite a few things that annoy me about them
Friend 1: is a nurse, and yes she does work nights, but my God sometimes it feels like she is the only one working the way she goes on. Ya you work hard, but so do i, i just don't go on about it!

Friend 2: moans about not ever having money. She owes me 100eur. Yet she is the first always on wkends away and new clothes:mad:

Friend 3: too insecure. Literally will bring everything back to herself. Gives out to me because i work in the public sector and have a secure (enough) job and she has a job that isin't so secure. My reaction is always, "Well if you didn't feck off to Oz for 2 years, while i stayed at home and worked my ass off for the job, than maybe you might have secured something better."
Rant over

tough__cookie

I have a friend who must have been born on the dole. All he ever does is bang on about how tired he is from nights out drinking :mad: really pisses me off! I never go on about how tired I am from my full-time job and my training. Oh and then he feels the urge to text or ring me at 3am the weekends to tell me gossip when he knows I work the weekends. (always keep phone on silent coz of this but its still annoying)

(not having a go at people on the dole, this guy just doesn't want to work, lazy out)

LegacyUser

Regarding a few, not all of my friends: They don't have enough ambition. They are really intelligent, learn new things so quickly, could have a conversation on any topic under the sun, yet have no interest in getting any formal qualifications, or even a job that would let them learn new things or demonstrate their ability.
They're happy to just stay on the dole, and drink their money away at weekends.[This is even when there was jobs]
It's very frustrating, because they have so much potential, but just were never taught to see themselves as college or career type people. All their life they will just 'settle' for a job they hate, or else just for the easy but repetitive boring type of life of doing nothing everyday, and living for the weekend.
Some of them are happy like this, so that's ok, but some are unhappy so I try to tell them of all the opportunities that are available to them, and to make them see that they ARE capable of doing anything they set their mind to.
It's very hard to change the perception of someone who has no self belief though, and it upsets and frustrates me, but I'll always keep trying.

[Just in case anyone jumps on me,I wouldn't try to change a friend who didn't want to change, but for the ones who do I will offer help and support.
I'm by no ways perfect myself, but am trying my best to get my degree, and hopefully a career I love in the future, and they all support me, so I try to support them too, no matter what job/hobby/dream they decide to follow.]

up for anything

For me, moving in with or going travelling with a best friend usually ended the friendship. I've noticed that is a lot of other people's experience as well.

elleburp

tough__cookie wrote: »

I hate when they stop making an effort to meet up / ring you and then your the one doing all the ringing and trying to meet up with them. :mad:

That's exactly why I don't hang around with them anymore, you can only do so much.

I don't mind if that's the case for the first year of their new relationship but after a year I think it's time to .... throw in the towel?

Kitty-kitty

tough__cookie wrote: »

oh my god oh my god do we have the same friend!!!! thats her!!!!!! :eek:

Nah, we all know one of them. Same friend who is constantly on a diet, constantly not losing any weight and constantly eating around you.

Best mate #1: It's not exactly her fault but she has a severe lack of confidence. Especially when it comes to dating. Even if someone clearly has an interest in her she insists that they must have an ulterior motive. She just doesn't see what a pleasant, attractive person she is.

Best mate #2: He's another story. He's a cocky little so-and-so that always has to tell you everything about his conquests, and expects the same back. His entire routine revolves around whoever he's seeing at the moment - to the point where he'll skip his friends' birthdays and other special occasions. Sometimes I really wish he'd prioritise a bit more
He also leeches his poor parents dry.

It's not that I don't love them. They just irritate me... a LOT

pollypocket10

Ok so my last message was a little in jest but I've honestly been racking my brains for something that annoys me about my friends & can't think of anything.

I am a bit of an introvert and it takes me AGES to get to know people and let them in so I suppose when you get into that group it means you are pretty special. I have only about 7 people that I consider good friends and I think they are great. Of course no-one is perfect, we can call each other on things if needs be but there isn't anyone that has a quality or does something repeatedly that annoys me (maybe I'm the annoying one in the group :eek:)

Of course there are loads of people who I am friendly with that annoy me but I just don't give those people much of my time.

liquoriceall

I wouldnt have that many friends (just not that sort of person) but the ones I do have are fantastic they drive me crazy sometimes with stupid thungs but Im certain that I drive them crazy too so I expect them to say nothing and vice versa!!

LittleBook

How bad they are with their money/finances

midlandsmissus

Kitty-kitty wrote: »

Let's not forget the friend, ladies, who's a size eight and constantly complains that she's SO FAT, generally to her plus-size friends. Yeah, love, it must be so hard for you, what with your size constantly on sale everywhere.

Oh! Or the one who borrows your clothes and then gets upset because they don't fit. "I'm even more fat than YOU!" I'm sorry?

To be honest I do this (the first one). I'm thin but I would say I'm unhappy with my figure cause I've a really massive stomach, I just put all the weight on there.

So if there's a bigger girl around and she say she's unhappy with her weight, I say 'yeah me too' and I'm greeted with scornful looks of"you? There's not a pick on you!"

Would they prefer me to go around saying "I have such a great body don't you agree"??

Annoying! I'm not happy with my body and I don't think any woman ever is!

tough__cookie

I agree with you about not everyone is happy with their bodies but a size 8 is nowhere near fat!

If a girl is an 8 I and she's moaning about being fat to her friend who's double her size, how big do you think that makes her friend feel??

Maple

tough__cookie wrote: »

I agree with you about not everyone is happy with their bodies but a size 8 is nowhere near fat!

If a girl is an 8 I and she's moaning about being fat to her friend who's double her size, how big do you think that makes her friend feel??

I don't think this is fair, it's all relative to the individual.

I might want to be a size 8 but if my size 8 friend is whining about having a fat day i'm not going to dismiss her feelings just because i'm a bigger size than her. Just because she's a size 8 doesn't mean that she's not allowed have some insecurities about her body shape.

Kooli

maple wrote: »

I don't think this is fair, it's all relative to the individual.

I might want to be a size 8 but if my size 8 friend is whining about having a fat day i'm not going to dismiss her feelings just because i'm a bigger size than her. Just because she's a size 8 doesn't mean that she's not allowed have some insecurities about her body shape.

But it is just so insensitive to talk about being fat to someone who is clearly and objectively fatter than you? It's just common decency?

Would you moan about not having enough spending money to someone on the dole? Would you give out about your mum being annoying to someone who's mother has just died? Those feelings are real too, but there's a time and a place!

Maple

Kooli wrote: »

But it is just so insensitive to talk about being fat to someone who is clearly and objectively fatter than you? It's just common decency?

Yes, but you're assuming that the larger person has issues with their own size. What if they don't?

And I don't think it fair that someone more slender than you (not you personally Kooli) not be allowed have a fat day and have a moan about feeling fat.

Obviously there is a difference between having a genuine I'm having a fat day moan and a fake I'm having a fat day moan. But I don't think that a skinnier person shouldn't be allowed have a moan too.

Kooli wrote: »

Would you moan about not having enough spending money to someone on the dole?

Again, within reason yes I would. Just because i'm not on the dole doesn't mean that i'm not allowed have a whinge about being skint. Times are tough and alot of people have been affected by cuts.

Again using common sense, I wouldn't start moaning about only being able to afford a 30 euro mascara instead of my usual 50 euro one. That's just ridiculous, but no I don't see any harm in having a genuine rant about things.

Kooli wrote: »

Would you give out about your mum being annoying to someone who's mother has just died? Those feelings are real too, but there's a time and a place!

That, I think is an extreme example and of course discretion would be required in this circumstance.

midlandsmissus

No matter how thin you are I don't think anyone ever thinks they are thin. Hands up who here has ever thought they were thin? I certainly haven't, its in our nature to pick at ourselves. To focus on what needs fixing and what needs changing.

It's like when I am talking to my mother about getting wrinkles, she said to me once "god will you stop, if you look old what do I look like!", and I wasn't even thinking of her at all, she was thinking I was implying: "wow she's REALLY old" .it was me I was picking at. We always pick at ourselves!

If there's a bigger girl near me saying how fat she feels, I never EVER think "HA yes you're really fat, I'm thinner than you haha!, instead I IMMEDIATELY think of what I don't like about my own body.

Similiarly the odd time I might come out with a comment first, something along the lines ofL "ugh I really want to tone up my stomach" I wouldn't even think of other bigger girls in the room, cause ya know that's their body and this is mine. It doesn't matter to me in the slightest if they're bigger than me, I'm still not happy with my body! People are only ever thinking of themselves, we're all insecure.

I'm sure alot of women can agree with me on this.

Shellygoose

I reckon I must be the luckiest girl ever cos I have 2 of the greatest friends anyone could wish for!! Now dont get me wrong, there have been times when the annoy me, but I know I do the same.

My best friend has been away for almost the last 2 years travelling and I miss her soooo much. She was home for a couple of weeks not long ago and it was brilliant to have her around "in person". I miss the everyday banter with her (obviously phone calls to Oz everyday would NOT be very cost effective!) Even though there are thousands of miles between us our friendship hasnt changed. They say that absence makes the heart grow fonder.....it definately does!

My other friend is always there for a bitch and a moan, but also there to offer advice and support. We love each others children like they are our own. I cant imagine letting 2 or 3 days go by without speaking with her or seeing her.

I've learnt that friendship is a 2 way street. I've spent far too much time worrying why so and so hasnt returned my calls...is it something i did or say etc. Like any relationship both parties involved must put the work in.

Celtise

I'm glad that only one of my close female friends has extreme issues with her weight (I mean, she's the only one that verbalises it). It is beyond annoying and makes everyone around her paranoid about their weight. I love her to bits other than this problem she has but I have to assess sometimes if I am able psychologically to see her if I have other issues going on. I know on the one hand this might seem rather selfesh of me but it has been going on a long time. I have tired to help her before to admit there is a problem and try to start a road to recovery but until she realises a problem exists, all I can do is make sure I am around to help her then and maintain my own mental health.

lisaface

Mashyling wrote: »

Is there such thing as a best friend? We chop and change friendships, best friends and other relationships throughout our lives. People grow out of friendships and move on. Is there anything that really annoys you about your friends. Are they inconsiderate, annoying. Does moving in with friends change how you feel about them? Tell All!! What do you guys think?;)

What annoys me most at the present moment is; one of them fair enough has alot going on or had, as have I but it's all built around HER and HER NEEDS, and my crap (just as bad) is just pushed to one side, also she picks at any man I'm friends with or have had any kind of date/thing with at present. Ie: look he ignored me you don't want to be friends/have a bf like that. He hasn't done this yet... bla bla bla

Her sh*t is man related, but when I'm going through crap and she's knows this I've NEVER bitched about a guy she's had a thing with, or complained about situations she's in ect ect. It's like I'm getting the feeling her friends can't be happy unless she is, ie: job wise, man, house ect. I want to work abroad and she keeps trying to put me off, because all her other friends are tied down in some situation be it children or their partners. I just think it's very unfair of her and selfish. I've been there for the past 3 years with this person and have done everything I can to cheer her up when he's let her down, but i'm about to crack. I also want time to hang out with other people and she's always here, like she pops out when her other friends are busy, it's very annoying. I've had to tell her to bugger off on saturday night because it was my actual best friends 21st, and she was trying to get me to cancel just so we could do what we seemingly do every bloody Friday, stay in get drunk and watch ****ty chick flicks.

I need a break - I grew up with this girl, and at times I find it hard to just tell her to piss off LOL I sound very harsh right now, but I've still got to deal with my own crap. I have to stop taking on own peoples sh*t and maybe then I'll learn!! It just makes me want to scream!

TheBunk1

My friends starting stupid fu*ckin threads like this irritates me!

Fu*ckin moany bitches

Rockery Woman

One of my closest friends is bulimic. I want to help her, I really do, but if anyone mentions anything about it to her there is a big row. I try to turn a blind eye - but its so hard. I love her so much and its breaking my heart seeing her, with her bones sticking out, referring to herself as fat!

My best male friend is fantastic. Funny, smart, cute - everything!!! He is Polish.... I love him to bits - sometimes things get lost in translation - his english is improving every day though!!!

I love my friends - if they were perfect - they wouldn't be my friends as I am far from perfect myself.

Celtise

Rockery Woman wrote: »

One of my closest friends is bulimic. I want to help her, I really do, but if anyone mentions anything about it to her there is a big row. I try to turn a blind eye - but its so hard. I love her so much and its breaking my heart seeing her, with her bones sticking out, referring to herself as fat!

Going through the same thing. We noticed it first about two years ago. It gradually got worse and worse. Now all she talks about is food and exercise or about other peoples. At the time, we did subtly mention things and try to bring it up. Other times, things got so intolerable we tried harder to help her realise there was a problem but she would shut us out more and more then or ignore us completely for a time.

The last straw was when she collapsed in the shower one morning last year and even when I didn't know this I refused to let her go to work because she looked so frail. She hadn't eaten in three days straight either. When I found out these plus about this risky diet drugs she'd been taking, I decided I needed to create some distance for my own mental health. I am still in her life but not to the same extent. I am here for her when she realises the problem but I can't do anymore to help her until then, especially when her mother is the main influence in her life and approves of her current "lifestyle".

Sorry for oversharing.

All my male close friends are amazing and some of the best people I have ever known. As someone above already said, no one is without faults, but they also make a person who they are.

Kooli

midlandsmissus wrote: »

No matter how thin you are I don't think anyone ever thinks they are thin. Hands up who here has ever thought they were thin?

I wouldn't even think of other bigger girls in the room, cause ya know that's their body and this is mine. It doesn't matter to me in the slightest if they're bigger than me, I'm still not happy with my body! People are only ever thinking of themselves, we're all insecure.

I am baffled by the first point, it is definitely not normal for people to never ever think they are thin no matter how thin they are!! There was one time in my life I was thin, and I knew I was thin and I knew I looked great! (I wasn't too thin or anything, I was just thin).

And to say that everyone is only thinking of themselves and not about the bigger people in the room - that may be true but doesn't make it OK! It is why this behaviour has made it on to this thread in the first place, it is irritating to friends. And as others have said, it can and does make other people feel bad about their own bodies when they mightn't otherwise.

optogirl

TheBunk1 wrote: »

My friends starting stupid fu*ckin threads like this irritates me!

Fu*ckin moany bitches

Did anyone invite you in here? No? See ya.

perri winkles

ONe of my friends is the biggest drama queen ever. Especailly with new relationships.
She manages to create drama with even the most nicest and easy going guys. Dunno how she does it. Love her to bits tho

Also really REALLY bugs me when they all go on about their boyfriends/potential boyfriends. I don't talk about my boyfriend 24/7 so why would I want to listen to mundane details about yours?!

Mashyling

Seriously, reading through all your replies, I am not surprised. Women seem to be constantly in competition with each other. Even good friends. I notice that when I dress for a night out, yes I like to look good for my boyfriend, but yes I do like to dress up to look better than my friends. I think its human nature. Now dont get me wrong, I dont rub the fact that I dress better than some of them in their faces or anything. I just happen to be friends with a group of really laid back girls. I would be the girly one so we do dress differently. Its amazing though I see other girls looking me up and down when I walk into a pub, and I look back at them and think, wow they look really good, or wow id love to look like her. I dont know are we all just kidding ourselves worrying about how we look compared to our friends!

Fiii

Maybe it's just me, but I don't really get this thread.

My closest friends are my closest friends because I think they are the greatest people on this planet and I am hopelessly in love with every single one of them, otherwise they wouldn't be my closest friends.
Nothing irritates me about them, and if it did I'd probably talk to them about it.

I had a lot of issues with 'friends' growing up, and lost almost all of them when I went to college, but in a way I think it was a good thing, because when my TRUE friends came along during/ after college I knew just how wonderful and important they were and have been friends with them ever since.

Kooli

Fiii wrote: »

Maybe it's just me, but I don't really get this thread.

My closest friends are my closest friends because I think they are the greatest people on this planet and I am hopelessly in love with every single one of them, otherwise they wouldn't be my closest friends.
Nothing irritates me about them, and if it did I'd probably talk to them about it.

I had a lot of issues with 'friends' growing up, and lost almost all of them when I went to college, but in a way I think it was a good thing, because when my TRUE friends came along during/ after college I knew just how wonderful and important they were and have been friends with them ever since.

While I see what you're saying I take the view that you love your best mates despite their irritating flaws, you don't love them because they don't have any!! And I don't believe all their irritating habits are things that need to be 'talked about'.

From my point of view, one friend will happily go along with any plan I make, but will NEVER come up with a plan of her own. Basically of the 'I don't mind' sort mentioned earlier.

Another is ALWAYS late. Always. In fact two of them are. I definitely talk to them about that one, but nothing changes!

Another is a bit passive aggressive, in the sense that she won't tell you directly if something is annoying her, but she will make it very clear in other ways.