Anti Women

LegacyUser

Hi guys,

I was just wondering about other views on the amount of antiwomen material there seems to be on the net. As a female I have to say it makes me very upset. Like today, I was on a friends page on facebook and I noticed that he had joined a group (I don't want to say the name to give them more publicity) that basically say women should get permission before talking. I know this is probably meant to be a joke and I like a joke as much as the next person. Anyway when I went in to look at this group there were pictures of women with black eyes with captions like "the whore should have kept her mouth shut" and "she left the kitchen". The worst part though is the comments. Loads of guys writing comments like "this is so awesome" "love this ****" kind of stuff and lots of "women are only good for cooking and to use as sex slaves" "I can't **** your college degree so don't bother getting educated bitch" I know this speaks volumes about the type of guys who find this funny and who would write comments like that but scary thing is the guys look "normal" and some of them are married with kids. Should I just lighten up and accept this. I did notice also that one or two females had slammed other girls who had complained about the comments. I think its blatant misogny dressed up as "lighten up and take a joke" Women are even falling into that trap thinking you are uptight if you don't enjpy porn and laugh at sexist jokes. Any views? Should I lighten up? Particulary interested in the male perspective.

LegacyUser

not a guy, but i do find it odd how racist remarks are taboo these days (and rightly so) but sexist ones are fine - and im not talking about the odd light-hearted comment between friends, but that page seems to be a bit far past that.
And yeah i hate that if you dont find it funny, you're a "stuckup b*tch" or "man-hating feminist" or something along those lines.

tenchi-fan

Hi
This isn't really a PI I don't think.
But, yea you probably need to lighten up. These groups are basically trolling for people who are easily offended and go out of their way to be offended.
I saw a group called "99 times it's ok to hit a woman and one time it's not" or something along those lines. the comments are just silly and while it's a bit of a joke, an employer would not find it so funny!
They usually don't last long before they get enough complaints and are deleted by facebook.

liah

I know how you feel. I don't think guys really "get" it, nor particularly want to, because they've never honestly experienced anything like it (though they may think they have.. they just haven't). So they see someone getting upset about something as seemingly innocuous as that (to them) and they get their laugh. The thing they don't understand, though, is that we hear/see stuff like this every single day, all over the entire bloody internet, and a lot of the time in person, depending on your crowd. It's not funny or clever or "taboo," it's as old as it comes, it's boring, and it's offensive simply for the sake of being offensive.

I'm absolutely dead sick of it and really, truly wish people would just cop on. But the worst part is I can't say anything about it, because then I'd just be seen as having no sense of humour or as being stuck up. It's nothing to do with that. It's the fact that literally half the population is completely discredited constantly in the mainstream and nobody thinks twice, like it's okay and acceptable for people to say/think things like that. It's also the fact that men go out of their way to piss us off. As if it's funny. Maybe it is, but I don't really see the joke in trying to hurt other people. Guess it's just lost on me. But who cares who suffers at the expense of your joke, right? Besides, they're only women, they're crazy/probably pmsing/irrational/whatever the latest and greatest is. :rolleyes:

While people will maintain it's all "just jokes guyz lol get over it!!", there's more to it than that. But anyone with a penis isn't particularly likely to understand it.

porschespeedst

guestbhwk wrote: »

I think its blatant misogny dressed up as "lighten up and take a joke" Women are even falling into that trap thinking you are uptight if you don't enjpy porn and laugh at sexist jokes. Any views? Should I lighten up? Particulary interested in the male perspective.

I have never come across this type of site, but speaking as a male and based on your description, I think you are right in viewing it as misogynistic. I would have no interest in looking at such a site, it sounds a bit sad. I'd like to think the majority of guys wouldn't either.

tenchi-fan

liah wrote: »

While people will maintain it's all "just jokes guyz lol get over it!!", there's more to it than that. But anyone with a penis isn't particularly likely to understand it.

That comment is pretty sexist!

I think programmes like Family Guy and Southpark help push the boat out a bit and promote this sort of humour.

But if you don't like being offended and you see a group called "Not all men just want a relationship for sex, Some want their ironing done" or "The awkward feeling you get when a woman speaks without permission"... just ignore it!! Don't click on it and read the comments. Delete the friend who posted it if you like!

LegacyUser

Guy here,
The answer would be ya lighten up.
guys say stuff like that all the time, seriously a lot more than you think but I can safely say that in 99% of cases it isnt meant. Its like telling racist jokes or whatever and arent intended to be hurtful as they are soo sexist that it is obvious that they are not being serious. Like seriously do you believe that any guy on that site actually believs women need permission to talk? of course not. They say stuff like that to look macho or alpha male or something and I dont think any guy would say that stuff to a womans face unless he knew she would as a joke. Personally Id say I respect women and wouldnt treat them any differently than men but I still find these type of sites hillarious. So ya lighten up.

now get back to the kitchen

Des Carter

liah wrote: »

I know how you feel. I don't think guys really "get" it, nor particularly want to, because they've never honestly experienced anything like it (though they may think they have.. they just haven't). So they see someone getting upset about something as seemingly innocuous as that (to them) and they get their laugh. The thing they don't understand, though, is that we hear/see stuff like this every single day, all over the entire bloody internet, and a lot of the time in person, depending on your crowd. It's not funny or clever or "taboo," it's as old as it comes, it's boring, and it's offensive simply for the sake of being offensive.

I'm absolutely dead sick of it and really, truly wish people would just cop on. But the worst part is I can't say anything about it, because then I'd just be seen as having no sense of humour or as being stuck up. It's nothing to do with that. It's the fact that literally half the population is completely discredited constantly in the mainstream and nobody thinks twice, like it's okay and acceptable for people to say/think things like that. It's also the fact that men go out of their way to piss us off. As if it's funny. Maybe it is, but I don't really see the joke in trying to hurt other people. Guess it's just lost on me. But who cares who suffers at the expense of your joke, right? Besides, they're only women, they're crazy/probably pmsing/irrational/whatever the latest and greatest is. :rolleyes:

While people will maintain it's all "just jokes guyz lol get over it!!", there's more to it than that. But anyone with a penis isn't particularly likely to understand it.

Does someone have PMS?

anyway guys dont mean it to be harmful as the majority of guy dont believe it yet still find it funny. Also they dont seem to say this stuff directly to women unless they are hiding behind a computer.

Victor

lighten-up wrote: »

now get back to the kitchen

Possibly funny.

Des Carter wrote: »

Does someone have PMS? :

Pushing it.

Can we keep the jokes for elsewhere?

porschespeedst

lighten-up wrote: »

Personally Id say I respect women and wouldnt treat them any differently than men but I still find these type of sites hillarious. So ya lighten up.

now get back to the kitchen

See, that's precisely what they're complaining about. Laughing off misyogny and treating as a joke. And though I don't agree with everything Liah, in particular, said in her post, the lack of empathy or basic sensitivity displayed by some men seems a valid complaint, to me.

The_Minister

Maybe move this to TLL?

Nevyn

A lot of people who have never had that crap said to them and it be seriously meant think that nobody ever says that stuff for real so anyone who find it objectionable needs to lighten up.

Unfortunately a lot of people do still say that type of crap for real seriously or worse
as a way of belittling a person or putting them down and pretend it's a joke so that when you call them on it you are thin skinned and have no sense of humor.

I don't agree with 'it's only a joke' be the butt of the joke often enough and it's not funny at all.

A lot of people in their early 20s think there is equality between the genders and spousal/partner abuse and sexism is a thing of the past, unfortunately it's not and it's still such a taboo that people don't speak out about for fear of being told 'lighten up' or 'you are too thin skinned' or ' oh please stop playing the victim'.

Both men and women do this it's not just guys, but men in general tend to be more unaware of how sexist comments even in jest rob women of confidence and are a turn off and with people both men and women not calling them on it, it will continue.

So don't think there is something wrong with you if such things make you feel uncomfortable.

krudler

Theres a big flip side to this, what about the amount of anti-men advertising in the mainstream media? as in whats on ad breaks every night on tv, not on some unknown website or facebook group. Think of the amount of ads portraying men as these feckless morons who cant work washing machines or mind kids or do the shopping or buy the proper household products. That famous ad of the guy who cant wash his own shirt and has to get his mother to do it? if that was an ad showing a woman afraid of a spider or some other cliched crap waiting to be saved by a man there'd be uproar from the "feminists" (most of whom dont even know what that word means). But if a guy complains about this he gets the standard "sure isnt it true?!" attitude from women, yes of course we cant use hoovers or work washing machines (despite the fact it was men who invented them to begin with I might add).

There are plenty of mysoginistic assholes in the world, dont worry yourself thinking about it.

Nevyn

krudler please keep this on topic and helpful to the op.

liah

tenchi-fan wrote: »

That comment is pretty sexist!

I don't think so. How are men meant to relate if they don't have to experience it daily like we do?

Maybe I see more of this because I've spent a lot of time gaming and on forums and on the 'net in general and most of my friends are male, but men definitely don't have to deal with half of that type of sexism, not by a long shot.

Angus Og

It's disgusting really. There's nothing funny about this behaviour, and if your friend joins a group like that you should make your feelings known about it. If this was about a friend joining a neo-nazi group would people say lighten up? No.

There isn't much you can do about it, but if any of my male friends were part of a group like that, I'd be asking myself if I ever really knew them.

It's disgusting.

Eve_Dublin

It makes me sad and depressed too. I always believed Ireland was a relatively equal society and I still do but when I joined Boards and logged into AH and saw so much anti-Irish female (and just plain anti-female) b-shyte and it upsets me and I´m almost sure I´m not alone. There´s a whole proportion of Irish men who dislike me purely because I´m female. These same men wouldn´t dream of starting threads condeming immigrants etc because this would be racist. There is absolutely no difference and these men need to put themselves in our shoes for two seconds and try and understand how we might feel. This is only the tip of the iceberg of what we endure on a daily basis though.

And no, I´m not a man-hating feminist for thinking this.

Jenneke87

Yes indeed, those groups are sooo funny, we should all just lighten up and forget that, still, for many women, this is reality. If so don´t believe me go to countries like Somalie, Afghanistan and the like.

To a lesser extent, many women still face comments like that. I was told by a man that I should not speak `because I have tits.` I saw the hurt looks on my mothers face when my father made sexist jokes about women despite her making his dinner every night and his breakfast, even if he had to go up and 04.00 in the morning, never asking for anything in return.


Facebook pages that reduce women to the status of kitchenslaves are not something to celebrate. Guys who say that`we should lighten up`should try to imagine their wifes/girlfriend/sisters on those pictures and see if they still find it funny.....

prinz

Personally I find it's actually women who are far, far worse these days at promoting sexism against women than men. In my, and my OH's experience and she has spoken of this to me many times, she is far more likely to get negative comments from other women about what she likes, what she wants in life etc.

Eoin

That type of stuff isn't on. But you're kidding yourself if you think that men aren't discriminated against, or that there aren't double standards.

irishh_bob

theese ( disgusting ) derogrotory comments are coming from fringe media , when it comes to mainstream media , it is men who are subject to sexism the vast majority of the time , as another poster has pointed out , in advertising on tv or radio , men are potrayed as moronic ( homer simpsons like ) and infantile and usually incapable of opening a can of beans

Vomit

Like most idiotic things on the internet, it's probably written by sheltered, middle class young men who think the world is their playground and that other people and all topics are just toys to be played with.

Cheap Thrills!

I'm a woman and I have to say that type of stuff rolls off me like water off a ducks back. It's just blokes being outrageous/shocking in an ironic way most of the time.

Yes, you'll get the odd freak who actually thinks like that but they'll actually be pariahs amongst men as much as women.

I think its a backlash against the kind of humorless feminism that existed 20-30 years ago. Which by the way I don't think did women many favours. In fact it characterised feminists as aggressive, bitter and unbalanced. As well as blind to their own double standards ('all men are bastards!' 'men are thick') etc

Feminism has moved on from that but you still get the odd bullyish, entrenched feminist and men remember that with distaste. I believe the mysoginistic braggadio you see online and in lads mags now are a kick against those 'feminst' double standards.

I wouldn't take it seriously. Its a banter that goes on with lads but for the most part their tongues are firmly in their cheeks as far as I can make out.

And for those blokes who actually mean that stuff literally well, you can do nothing but pity them really or hope they end up married to Mllie Tant!

prinz

Cheap Thrills! wrote: »

I think its a backlash against the kind of humorless feminism that existed 20-30 years ago.

It still exists, the target it women now as much as men.

Cheap Thrills!

prinz wrote: »

It still exists, the target it women now as much as men.

Yeah, but I ignore those bully type feminists, what never fails to amaze me about them is they can't see the irony of their own hypocritical actions.

They vilify men for certain mindsets/behaviours in the past but they want now to indulge in exactly the same kinds of things.

For that reason I would not identify with a militant feminist at all. Too bitter and unbalanced constantly polishing their chip on their shoulders!

Nevyn

Cheap Thrills! I fail to see how your insulting posts about feminist are helpful to the op and do nothing but insult those posters who do consider themselves feminists, if you which to have such discussions PI is not the place.

Nevyn

Cheap Thrills! please pm me rather then dragging this thread further off topic.

Please note this thread is about helping the OP deal with what they are feeling
after encountering a male friend part taking in what she sees as online groups making light of or condoning sexist and anti women material and what she should do about it.

LegacyUser

I have received demeaning comments from men while I've been out in the daytime on the way to the shops, (and no I wasn't wearing a short skirt or attracting attention to myself). It can be baffling and hurtful but the men (they are always men not school boys) who do it are never on their own they are always with a group and what they are really doing is shouting their insecurities from the roof tops. It's the same online. It's best just to accept that these men are scared and/or stupid and grow a thick skin o.p. It's clear to see that there is a problem with after hours it attracts the lowest common denomentor Irish Sun/Mirror/Daily Mail reader types, but I don't know what the moderators can do, where exactly do you draw the line? You do have to wonder though when you are standing at the bus stop looking at the Hunky Dory adverts how backward Irish society is.

Sorry

I notice it all the time, everywhere. Even on Boards. At the end of the day, there's nothing you can do but try to counter it as often as you can, e.g. reporting comments on youtube. The sad fact of the matter is that these young men are mildly retarded and if they weren't foaming at the mouth talking of how many 'bitches' they wanted to 'fúck' they would be in the garden running around with their pants down throwing beefburgers at frightened cats.

I am a man by the way, and I don't think the important point is about how men will never understand what it is like. You don't have to experience sexism personally to be abhorred by it. I'm not black, so while I will never truly feel what it's like to suffer a racist attack such as being called the n-word, it doesn't mean I can't relate in a sense that I understand it must be hurtful, frustrating and upsetting, and we have all felt these feelings .

So anyway, I hate that nonsense sexism, but it's usually coming from immature idiots (Even though it's still entrenched to the degree that people who should know better engage in sexist behaviour).

Also, I think that you should defriend these people. People have to start standing up to it. Perhaps if a lot of female friends deleted him he would assess his actions and maybe learn a lesson.

MagicSean

Without knowing your friend I can't really tell you what to do. But you know him. So if you know he has joined it as a joke you should lighten up. If you think he is in any way serious maybe you shouldn't be his friend. If he is only joking and you still find it offensive maybe you shouldn't be friends as you obviously aren't compatible.

These joke and emails are just as common in relation to men. I often get emails about our stupidity and uselessness. But I think that this kind of comedy helps to break barriers and perceptions. It usually highlights how ridiculous these kinds of sexist views are.

Mrmoe

There are lots of things out there that I do not agree with and infuriate me at times. This will be the way with everyone, there will always be something that they find offensive that other people do not. It would be better to avoid these kind of things unless you can change them. This is a lesson to learn in life, people think differently, it is best to just move on at times.

WesternNight

People joke about this kind of stuff all the time. A woman gets annoyed about it, says so, and we all know how quickly it turns into "Sure it was just a joke, relax, jeez!" like it's the woman's problem for taking issue with a comment.

It would be a real joke if it were the case that people didn't actually believe a lot of this stuff. Way too many people still do, men and women, and until that's not the case, I think women have every right to tell people to cop themselves on if they think it's ok to joke about it.

LegacyUser

I agree with Western night.

Other men are afraid to not laugh at sexist jokes etc as they would be shunned by the lads or perhaps they find them funny. the thing about jokes are though is that there is always a grain of truth in them. What would be the point of them otherwise. But women also are to blame in that they don't challenge these jokes/sites etc when they come across them because they don't want men to disapprove. So its a win -win for men. they can say what they like and then say "it was joke". They set the rules and women (some not all) try to please them. Why is it ok to have anti-woman sites on fb but not anti black, gay etc. Because people know that it will be tolerated by men and women (trying to please men by being all "liberated".) Its sick and pathetic. I stood up to sexism when I saw it in my last job. Ended up not being supported by either men or women and people made comments that I had no sense of humour. When I was going to an interview my boss who was female told me to wear a low cut top as it would increase my chances! Its heartening to hear from some decent men here who obviosuly see that misogny for what it is. Misogny hurts men also now women - forces men into that masculine steroetype that discourages feminine attributes (talking about feelings etc). I don't think we have come far in terms of gender equality. I think it has been forced on society in terms of equal opportunities etc so men go underground to vent their hatred of women so called promotion. We were probaly better off in the 1950s!

liah

eoin wrote: »

That type of stuff isn't on. But you're kidding yourself if you think that men aren't discriminated against, or that there aren't double standards.

irishh_bob wrote:

theese ( disgusting ) derogrotory comments are coming from fringe media , when it comes to mainstream media , it is men who are subject to sexism the vast majority of the time , as another poster has pointed out , in advertising on tv or radio , men are potrayed as moronic ( homer simpsons like ) and infantile and usually incapable of opening a can of beans

k_mac wrote: »

These joke and emails are just as common in relation to men. I often get emails about our stupidity and uselessness. But I think that this kind of comedy helps to break barriers and perceptions. It usually highlights how ridiculous these kinds of sexist views are.

No. They're not just as common. Sorry.

1) Nobody is saying men aren't discriminated against on a lot of things. What I am saying is that there is no equivalent on such an absolutely massive scale for men as what's going on here. There just isn't.

2) This is a very specific type of discrimination. This isn't a debate about men's rights with their children or about how men are portrayed in television ads or whatever else. This is about what ultimately amounts to (indirect in the cases of the facebook pages) internet bullying that's seeped into the mainstream.
You can bring up ads and things like that, but it's completely, wholly groundless-- those ads you're referencing that are placing men as useless idiots are the exact same ads stereotyping women as being the ones who should do the childcare, laundry, dishes, etc. And what about the fecking Lynx ads? Ads do not belong in a responsible debate. At all. Ever. They're sexist to both genders in equal amounts. This? This is not.

This is a list of some of the more common facebook groups displaying sexism towards women. Please note that there ARE a lot of "equivalent" groups targeting men, but that they were only created after the flood of the original anti-women pages-- as retaliation from the irked females. Childish, yes, but not quite the same thing.

This is just Facebook. Facebook is pretty well-censored, for the record. Word for word.

-The New Apple Device for Women - The iRon
-Why do women buy watches when there's a clock on the oven?
-FACT!! All women are mental..
-The awkward feeling you get when a woman enters a room without a sandwich
-You can bate the wife but you can't bate the craic
-If shawty can't take a dick she best be able to make me a sandwich
-'if i were a boy'... well your not and i dont see my dinner on the table!!
-Women are instantly more attractive when they shut up and make sandwiches
-I laugh at women that work at Subway cuz they HAVE to make me a sandwich
-Women only have orgasms because it's another chance for them to moan.
-OMG It's the WOMEN'S EDITION OF CoD!!! (CoD = a videogame called Call of Duty, page features a picture of an iron)
-Women cant drive? Its okay, theres no road between the kitchen and bedroom
-My mind was blown when i realised "Women" spelt backwards is "Kitchen"
-Why is Alice in wonderland? She should be in the fu*king kitchen.
-Girls have no reason to moan about COD. Can't even see it from the kitchen.
-Girls only fancy Cook (a character from the TV show 'Skins') because he reminds them of the kitchen.
-Hey baby, here have a turn on COD... LOL jk, go back to the kitchen
-girls think giving birth is hard, try playing COD on a laggy connection.
-Girls should make the first move, and that first move should be a sandwich.

As you can see, these are all bastions of hilarity and originality. Clearly women should never get tired of seeing or hearing things like that.

On websites like Digg (massive user-generated news website), the exact same shít is regurgitated on any article at all that involves women/a woman. And dugg up into oblivion (digg equivalent of boards' thanks).

Example:
http://digg.com/people/What_10_000_Women_Really_Think

First few comments:

They all lied about their parallel parking skills

+1179 diggs.

blah... blah... blah... blah... blah... blah... blah... blah... blah... blah... blah... blah... blah... blah... blah... blah... blah... blah... blah... blah... blah... blah... blah... blah... blah... blah... blah... blah... blah... blah... blah... blah... blah... blah... blah... blah... blah... blah... blah... blah... blah... blah... blah... blah... blah... blah... blah... blah...

+858 diggs.

They can think whatever they want, as long as they are doing their thinking in the kitchen.

+832 diggs.

During my more active competitive gaming days, this was the kind of stuff I had regurgitated at me multiple times a day, every single day. Except this is the censored version. Generally what I would hear would be a lot more crass, vulgar, demeaning. Everything about me would be criticized-- how I looked, how I sounded, how I played. If I played well, I apparently had a guy playing for me or was cheating. I was constantly called ugly, bitch, whore, slut, idiot. Told that if I put a bag over my head and shut up I'd be okay for a lay. Any time I had an opinion on a topic that was against the grain, I was being irrational and told to go back to the kitchen. Any time I spoke with any emotion about anything, I was PMSing and again, was told to go back to the kitchen. If I posted anything, anything at all, I was branded an attention whore. If I posted my picture in a "know your nerds" style thread, at the same rate as any other male, I was branded an attention whore. If I had a group of male friends hanging out in ventrilo (voice communication program), I was accused of flirting or again, attention whoring. Sure I've even had them take photos off my facebook and photoshop dicks onto my face or in my mouth.

Most people saying these things were males who were generally 18+. In fact, the younger ones were often more polite.

Now please try and tell me men experience this exact same thing to this all-encompassing, everywhere-you-look level online. It just doesn't exist. It's absolutely rampant here on boards, go look for yourself. Don't use this thread to soapbox about men's rights because you're butthurt that we're sick of these "jokes."

LegacyUser

Liah,

+ 1

you go girl!!!

Does complaining to FB help btw?

prinz

liah wrote: »

No. They're not just as common. Sorry.
1) Nobody is saying men aren't discriminated against on a lot of things. What I am saying is that there is no equivalent on such an absolutely massive scale for men as what's going on here. There just isn't.

There is. Women against women. It just isn't as in your face but is far more pervasive on a subconscious level.

Ickle Magoo

Hmmm, I'm not sure if there are very many men - or women - who are really anti-women.

There is a really, really, really fine line between ironic and stereotypical humour and crossing the boundary and sounding seriously misogynistic, sexist and demeaning and I think a lot of people just don't have the ability to decipher where the boundary is, often either because of the large chip they carry on their shoulder because of real life dealings with women and others who have only been close to a real woman when their mammy cuddles them.

I seriously don't think there is malice involved, for the most part. I think it's driven mostly by ignorance and a significant lack of EQ and that's why folks get so defensive when they are pulled up for crossing the line, they're embarrassed. I think there are a lot of posters aiming for the funny, socially aware comments who miss by a country mile and just come across as childish, churlish and rather inexperienced. I wouldn't let it bother you.

liah

prinz wrote: »

There is. Women against women. It just isn't as in your face but is far more pervasive on a subconscious level.

"massive scale for men". Not women against other women.

prinz

Ickle Magoo wrote: »

Hmmm, I'm not sure if there are very many men - or women - who are really anti-women.

It's no so much ant-women/anti-men but the creation of an image of what they should aspire to do/to be. As someone said earlier all this macho male nonsense is a tongue in cheek (for the most part) response to other people who take things to an opposite extreme IMO.

Ickle Magoo

prinz wrote: »

It's no so much ant-women/anti-men but the creation of an image of what they should aspire to do/to be. As someone said earlier all this macho male nonsense is a tongue in cheek (for the most part) response to other people who take things to an opposite extreme IMO.

I was answering the OP re men being anti-women.

prinz

liah wrote: »

"massive scale for men". Not women against other women.

The point is that it exists, just far more cleverly, and it also needs to be addressed. Often times it's the very people who will lash out at idiotic things like those fb groups who will simultaneously have a blind spot when it comes to other forms of gender conditioning.

liah

prinz wrote: »

The point is that it exists, just far more cleverly, and it also needs to be addressed. Often times it's the very people who will lash out at idiotic things like those fb groups who will simultaneously have a blind spot when it comes to other forms of gender conditioning.

This thread isn't about that though. It's specifically about sexist comments from men towards women over the medium of the internet and how it's becoming more prevalent in face-to-face situations. I'm not arguing that what you mentioned was an issue-- it is, trust me, a very major one that I have a lot of time for-- but it's not one being covered here.

To the OP/Mods: I apologize. I know I'm kind of hijacking this thread but this is something that has been bothering me since I started gaming back in 2000. That's ten years of it. I need to blow off a little steam, and hopefully make some potential readers realize that this shít just is not funny or big or clever anymore and that these comments can be incredibly hurtful and upsetting.

WesternNight

liah wrote: »

-The New Apple Device for Women - The iRon
-Why do women buy watches when there's a clock on the oven?
-FACT!! All women are mental..
-The awkward feeling you get when a woman enters a room without a sandwich
-You can bate the wife but you can't bate the craic
-If shawty can't take a dick she best be able to make me a sandwich
-'if i were a boy'... well your not and i dont see my dinner on the table!!
-Women are instantly more attractive when they shut up and make sandwiches
-I laugh at women that work at Subway cuz they HAVE to make me a sandwich
-Women only have orgasms because it's another chance for them to moan.
-OMG It's the WOMEN'S EDITION OF CoD!!! (CoD = a videogame called Call of Duty, page features a picture of an iron)
-Women cant drive? Its okay, theres no road between the kitchen and bedroom
-My mind was blown when i realised "Women" spelt backwards is "Kitchen"
-Why is Alice in wonderland? She should be in the fu*king kitchen.
-Girls have no reason to moan about COD. Can't even see it from the kitchen.
-Girls only fancy Cook (a character from the TV show 'Skins') because he reminds them of the kitchen.
-Hey baby, here have a turn on COD... LOL jk, go back to the kitchen
-girls think giving birth is hard, try playing COD on a laggy connection.
-Girls should make the first move, and that first move should be a sandwich.

The ones in bold are the ones I'd take most offense to. Whatever about the kitchen references, I have absolutely no time for anyone who jokes about beating women or treating them as if their sole purpose is to provide sex.


I never really experienced a whole lot of discrimination while gaming. Everyone used to assume everyone else was male though, and were all "you're a girl??" if ever I mentioned it. There were actually loads of women playing so I'm not sure how it was always such a shock. I never played CoD though.

liah

WesternNight wrote: »

The ones in bold are the ones I'd take most offense to. Whatever about the kitchen references, I have absolutely no time for anyone who jokes about beating women or treating them as if their sole purpose is to provide sex.


I never really experienced a whole lot of discrimination while gaming. Everyone used to assume everyone else was male though, and were all "you're a girl??" if ever I mentioned it. There were actually loads of women playing so I'm not sure how it was always such a shock. I never played CoD though.

You play MMOs so? WoW, Guild Wars, etc.?

Girls tend to be fairly widely accepted these days in MMOs. I am genuinely curious as to what kind of gaming you're into now, because with competitive FPS, not so much on the acceptance thing, particularly because of stupid organizations who use all-female teams for promotion. These girls can't game, they do absolutely nothing other than sit there and look as sexy as possible. All it does is reinforce the stereotype that girls who game only do it for attention and should only be judged on how they look rather than how well they play.

EDIT: tues1, no. Reporting to Facebook will do nothing. Report racist, homophobic, anti-religious content and it gets removed within the day, or at least within the week. But you can write any kind of crap about genders and nothing will ever be done.

WesternNight

You play MMOs so? WoW, Guild Wars, etc.?

Girls tend to be fairly widely accepted these days in MMOs. I am genuinely curious as to what kind of gaming you're into now, because with competitive FPS, not so much on the acceptance thing, particularly because of stupid organizations who use all-female teams for promotion. These girls can't game, they do absolutely nothing other than sit there and look as sexy as possible. All it does is reinforce the stereotype that girls who game only do it for attention and should only be judged on how they look rather than how well they play.

Used to play WoW. Not anymore though so I'm not sure what it's like now. Played for about 2 years but was never really a "gamer" as such. The other games never appealed to me.

In fairness even in WoW I came across a fair few girls who were there for attention. Used to hate it because it because you just knew that they were the reason women were always underrated in the gaming world.

Nevyn

Please resist the urge to back seat mod and people the topic is dealing with friends who think anti women crap is funny. Yes men get crap said about them as well but that is not what the thread is about.

liah

The boy walks in the door. I said I'm soapboxing on boards. He said "you mean bítch fighting?"

...

:pac:

JimmyCrackCorn

It works both ways

Iv seen sexist behaviour from men and also from women targeted at both sexes.

I guess the difference is men wont protest as much as women do. I don't expect it to go away any time soon either.

I will say though that its the intent behind the joke that's more important. While im all for a little bit of political in-correctnesses in jest it depends on the intent behind it.

PK2008

You've started a big debate OP but to address your actual personal issue with this I suggest you use the report option in Facebook and move on.

Getting upset over the ills of the world is easy and understandable but will serve you little good. People can be sexist, racist, homphobic, some people rob old granny's, the list is endless. Its not right and we shouldnt turn a blind eye to it but getting depressed isnt going to help, try channeling that emotion into something positive.

Accept the things you cant change or try to change the things you cant accept.

santana75

All men hate women, didnt you know that?

Jokes aside, Im starting to think the above statement is true. Im a man and Ive been working on my self-awareness for the past few years. This has thrown up a lot of issues that previously hovered just under the suface with me. And one of those issues has to do with my own attitude towards women. I always thought I liked women, thought I got along fine with them but if Im being honest with increasing self-awareness I was shocked to find that I did harbour ill will, anger and even some hatred towards the fairer sex. I wanted to understand why I felt this way so this led me to read a book by Adam Jukes, "Why men hate women." Its eye opening and shocking stuff. The most shocking aspect of it though is how women can be complicit in the repression, or exploitation of other women(Hunky Dorey billboards come to mind). Its also a very intricate and complex issue.
So I do think theres an edge to the comments the OP referred to on that facebook page. People often say things, behind a veil of humour, that are nasty and designed to cut. And when these comments are challenged the old, I was only joking card is played, or, can you not take a joke.

I know this is a very controversial issue but, having read Adam Jukes' book and from watching male/female interactions closely since reading this book, Id have to reluctantly agree with his theory that buried deep within the psyche of every man is a hatred of women.

WesternNight

santana75 wrote: »

The most shocking aspect of it though is how women can be complicit in the repression, or exploitation of other women

I don't think many women would disagree with that. It's a massive problem. But it's not the issue of this particular thread.

Have you given any thought to why you feel this way towards women? Is it in certain situations or right across the board? I'm genuinely interested because not many men would admit to actually hating women.