Would you not date or be Friends with anyone cause of their social background?

arsenallegend · 26-04-2010 11:48am #1

so have you met anyone who's looked down upon you, a friend or A girl/boyfriend because of your accent, background(working class,middle class or upper class) has it effect you in anyway or have you seen it happen.

Sykk · 26-04-2010 11:49am

Yes, I'd never touch a North sider.

FYI, your topic name is a question.. Then your containing question is the opposite. So people's answers will contradict themselves unless they refer to one of the questions when answering.

Wazdakka · 26-04-2010 11:53am

Nope.... It all depends on the person not where they are from.
If the person is a thick as sh1t or a complete bitch it doesn't matter if they're from Donnybrook or Darndale.

Having said that... The AJH* accent can be a bit offputting

* Ah Jasus Howaye

nice1franko · 26-04-2010 11:54am

I've a northside dub accent. It's a huge advantage because it acts as a very effective filter: anyone who "looks down" at me because of it is obviously an idiot and I can save a lot of time and energy by knowing this early on.

Dudess · 26-04-2010 11:57am

Really couldn't give a **** what a person's background is.

hidinginthebush · 26-04-2010 11:59am

Sykk wrote: »

Yes, I'd never touch a North sider.

FYI, your topic name is a question.. Then your containing question is the opposite. So people's answers will contradict themselves unless they refer to one of the questions when answering.

are you trying to be funny, or would you actually not go out with someone purely based on the fact that they live north of the river liffey in dublin? either way, i'd like to say [bannable personal abuse].

PCros · 26-04-2010 12:01pm

Probably southsiders because they think they're from West Hollywood and are brought up with everything in life payed for them.

Pittens · 26-04-2010 12:01pm

I dont suspect we will get too many honest answers here. In general mating in Ireland ( and the West in general) is like this:

1) The broad middle class i.e the university educated or post-schooled (e.g. nurses) marry each other. Thats a large pool ( it includes plenty of people with working class, or country accents).
2) The upper middle classes marry each other.
3) The bottom 10% marry each other.

billymitchell · 26-04-2010 12:01pm

After watching "My big fat gypsy wedding" again last night, my answer would have to be a "I obviously dont give a sh*t"

azezil · 26-04-2010 12:01pm

I'm an equal opportunities sex manchine. Giggidy.

arsenallegend · 26-04-2010 12:01pm

Wazdakka wrote: »

Nope.... It all depends on the person not where they are from.
If the person is a thick as sh1t or a complete bitch it doesn't matter if they're from Donnybrook or Darndale.

Having said that... The AJH* accent can be a bit offputting

* Ah Jasus Howaye

I'm from darndale and once people hear that they expect you to be a drug dealer,junkie or your going to beat the hell out of them. When you start up a interesting conversation they looked amazed:rolleyes:

funk-you · 26-04-2010 12:04pm

Sykk wrote: »

Yes, I'd never touch a North sider.

Doubt many of them would want to touch your Mexican ass with that attitude.

Tbh, it doesn't make much of a difference where someone is from. It's nice to experience something from outside your own little bubble of the world whether it be upper, lower sideways whatever.

-Funk

Rabies · 26-04-2010 12:05pm

yes.

I'm shallow.

It does play a big part

we'llallhavetea_old · 26-04-2010 12:05pm

it wouldn't bother me, as long as they're not assholes i don't mind.

alwaysadub · 26-04-2010 12:05pm

it has happened to me. When we moved house, from a normal estate in one part of Dublin, to a very posh estate in another part, no one would talk to us for ages. Most of the kids went to private or fee paying schools,i went to the community school. Bar a couple of neighbours on either side of us, i still know no one from the estate even though i lived there for 13years.

Pittens · 26-04-2010 12:05pm

yep.

no honest answers.

Michaelrsh · 26-04-2010 12:06pm

Don't really like those blacks or Jews too much.

azezil · 26-04-2010 12:06pm

Rabies wrote: »

yes.

I'm shallow.

It does play a big part

But why? You're a complete nack! :pac:

Marty McFly · 26-04-2010 12:08pm

It makes no differance to me were your from or what your social backround is. If theyve got a good personallity why should it matter.

Although being from clondalkin sometimes you can get a certain look when you tell people followed by "oh i see".

Des Carter · 26-04-2010 12:09pm

Everyone here saying it doesnt matter is full of sh!t. Of course it matters wheather you want to admit it or not. Honestly everyone has their prejudices and thats just the way it is

unless ur just looking for a shag (in which case it doesnt really matter).

Dudess · 26-04-2010 12:10pm

Pittens wrote: »

yep.

no honest answers.

To reiterate so: I really and truly could not give a **** what someone's background is. You're not right just because you assume you are.

Lux23 · 26-04-2010 12:12pm

I once went out with someone who considered himself upper class. He once said to me I like having you around because I have no other other friends who went to an inner city school. Which I found hilarious as I went to school in Swords but he thought that made me a hardcase. I have a very neutral accent too so when I tell people I am from the Northside and grew up in a council house they are always surprised. Well some people, some wouldn't bat an eyelid.

Dudess · 26-04-2010 12:12pm

Des Carter wrote: »

Everyone here saying it doesnt matter is full of sh!t. Of course it matters wheather you want to admit it or not.

Really, really doesn't to me - just because it matters to you doesn't mean everyone else is the same as you.

Sykk · 26-04-2010 12:12pm

hidinginthebush wrote: »

[bannable personal abuse].

Hardly.. A question was asked - I answered it. Hate the game, not the player!

dlofnep · 26-04-2010 12:15pm

No, never. My life would be dull if I had to listen to the same viewpoints, or accents or people everyday. We need variety, and anyone who looks down on someone because of their class - has no class.

In saying that - I do like my friends to have a bit of self-respect for themselves. It doesn't matter where they are from - so long as they don't act the muppet.

dlofnep · 26-04-2010 12:16pm

Des Carter wrote: »

Everyone here saying it doesnt matter is full of sh!t. Of course it matters wheather you want to admit it or not. Honestly everyone has their prejudices and thats just the way it is

Don't use your life experiences as the basis for everyone else's. It doesn't matter to me.

arsenallegend · 26-04-2010 12:19pm

I always felt my background went agaisn't me with a lot of women and i was once told that "i don't date northsiders" by some posh girl:eek:. least she was honest i suppose

Rabies · 26-04-2010 12:20pm

azezil wrote: »

But why? You're a complete nack! :pac:

thats why me and you can't work Az

you social background is too upper class..

Pittens · 26-04-2010 12:20pm

I really and truly could not give a **** what someone's background is. You're not right just because you assume you are.

I have lived in Cork. There is a Large Red Wall dividing the Northside from the Southside.
I worked in the Northside. Lived in Bishopstown. The bpoad "middle classes" ( i.e. office workers etc) dated. But the line remains.

I can tell the different accents apart. They are, in fact, radically different. Particuarly Knocknaheeny vs Douglas. As in Dublin.

As in Dublin I have never heard, nor do I ever expect to hear, two people holding hands with those divergent accents. It would be like FoxRock and Inner City.

Anybody can say anything. I dont have to believe it.

ChocolateSauce · 26-04-2010 12:20pm

It's not that I wouldn't, it's that I couldn't.

For example, I couldn't date a person who was religious, because an essential trait that date-able persons must have is a critical mind, something all religious people lack. It isn't a decision I have made, it's a fact about who I am.

And so on. Class has nothing to do with anything.

Des Carter · 26-04-2010 12:21pm

Dudess wrote: »

Really, really doesn't to me - just because it matters to you doesn't mean everyone else is the same as you.

Im not saying it matters to me Im saying everyone has some kind of prejudice towards some race, social background etc and to say that you see everyone in the exact same light is simply untrue - wheather its a traveller, a muslim on a plain or neo-nazis everyone looks down on other people to some extent even if they dont admit it or even mean to

NothingMan · 26-04-2010 12:22pm

we'llallhavetea wrote: »

it wouldn't bother me, as long as they're not assholes i don't mind.

How dare you . :mad:

Michaelrsh · 26-04-2010 12:22pm

Calvin Harris explains ...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O46nvb5ywgA

Irishcrx · 26-04-2010 12:23pm

I don't think I would have any issue with it, but then again can you all really say that use would be ok with dating a roman gypsy? And alot of upper class people I have met (Not all) have a very low opinion on the some of the poorer areas in Dublin and would have a massive problem with their sons/daughters dating someone from the area disregardless of how much a nice guy/girl they were, vice versa aswell.

I once had someone call to the door selling something, can't really remember why and when I answerd the door she asks me where I was from (Coolock) , then she asks originally (Coolock) , then asks where I got my accent from maybe expecting the thick Dublin accent and she found it unbelievable that I was actually well spoken??!

Pittens · 26-04-2010 12:25pm

And so on. Class has nothing to do with anything.

We should define terms. how many people would marry someone who left school at 16, has a very strong accent, and comes with tattoos and a bulldog.

Dudess · 26-04-2010 12:28pm

Pittens wrote: »

I have lived in Cork. There is a Large Red Wall dividing the Northside from the Southside.

There isn't really - not unless you choose to buy into that sh1t.

But the line remains.

Again, only for those who think that way. You're assuming that everyone thinks that way with your rather presumptuous "no honest answers" claim. Just because "that's the way it is" to you, doesn't mean everyone subscribes to it. So you've encountered a lot of people for whom background matters, it still doesn't mean it matters to everyone.

I can tell the different accents apart. They are, in fact, radically different. Particuarly Knocknaheeny vs Douglas.

Well duh...

Marty McFly · 26-04-2010 12:28pm

Pittens wrote: »

We should define terms. how many people would marry someone who left school at 16, has a very strong accent, and comes with tattoos and a bulldog.

Yeh why wouldnt you? If there personallity matches yours and you find them attractive what would be the problem?

ToxicPaddy · 26-04-2010 12:30pm

Nope, it wouldn't bother me at all where someone is from.

I've gone out with girls and have friends from all social classes and types of backgrounds.. and I don't hide the fact either. I don't understand people who are ashamed of their backgrounds..

I'm from a working class background and openly acknowledge it and am proud of it. My parents worked hard to give me a decent upbringing. I have a very neutral accent so you wouldnt know it when you met me and it surprises people a little when they find out..

Tox

jkrowling · 26-04-2010 12:30pm

Personally it doesn't make a difference, once a person isn't a right jacinta then it doens't matter to me where they come from.

I have a southside friend who refers to me as her ONF - obligatrry, northside friend and loves me bringing her out to pubs in Finglas and teaching her friends the slang words that me and my group of friends would use. Don't think this was degrading I actually think it's quite funny.

But on the downside, a few years back (actually many, many moons ago!!), I was seeing this guy from Castleknock, still northside of the river but seen as a more upmarket area than Finglas. At the time he was the love of my life and I thought he felt the same way but a few months into the relationship we broke up because he didn't want me going out with his UCD mates or meeting his family because he couldn't bear the thought of telling them I was from finglas. :eek:

Pittens · 26-04-2010 12:33pm

Just because "that's the way it is" to you, doesn't mean everyone subscribes to it. So you've encountered a lot of people for whom background matters, it still doesn't mean it matters to everyone.

I call cant. I said I never heard people dating with northside and southside accents in the city you live in. Not that the people I knew had that prejudice, not that I had ( I was a blowin), but it was clear - because accents are markers of social class - that there was no dating across class lines in Cork.

Not that there was some, or very little. But none. Absolutely none.

You on the other hand have dated computer scientists, physics majors, the Earl of Stratford, and the Knocknaheeny chap who has been unemplyed for 20 years and sold some dope on the side.

Its just everybody else.

Dudess · 26-04-2010 12:34pm

Pittens wrote: »

We should define terms. how many people would marry someone who left school at 16, has a very strong accent, and comes with tattoos and a bulldog.

Not that I honestly consider anything wrong with any of the above - and I really don't before you make assumptions - I thought we were focusing just on where a person comes from?

Riddle101 · 26-04-2010 12:35pm

I don't mind their backround as long as they're not w*nkers or cnuts. I could care less what their social backround is.

Dudess · 26-04-2010 12:37pm

Pittens wrote: »

I call cant. I said I never heard people dating with northside and southside accents in the city you live in. Not that the people I knew had that prejudice, not that I had ( I was a blowin), but it was clear - because accents are markers of social class - that there was no dating across class lines in Cork.

Not that there was some, or very little. But none. Absolutely none.

You on the other hand have dated computer scientists, physics majors, the Earl of Stratford, and the Knocknaheeny chap who has been unemplyed for 20 years and sold some dope on the side.

Its just everybody else.

Lol - I do believe you're TELLING me what my views are. Bye bye...

Oh just one last thing: what about a guy from Knocknaheeny who HASN'T been unemployed/dealing for the last 20 years? Because THAT, I believe, is what we're focusing on: purely where a person's from/their accent.

billymitchell · 26-04-2010 12:37pm

jkrowling wrote: »

Personally it doesn't make a difference, once a person isn't a right jacinta then it doens't matter to me where they come from.

I have a southside friend who refers to me as her ONF - obligatrry, northside friend and loves me bringing her out to pubs in Finglas and teaching her friends the slang words that me and my group of friends would use. Don't think this was degrading I actually think it's quite funny.

But on the downside, a few years back (actually many, many moons ago!!), I was seeing this guy from Castleknock, still northside of the river but seen as a more upmarket area than Finglas. At the time he was the love of my life and I thought he felt the same way but a few months into the relationship we broke up because he didn't want me going out with his UCD mates or meeting his family because he couldn't bear the thought of telling them I was from finglas. :eek:

Looks like you were better off without tbh!

I dont see what where somebody is from has to do with who they are! Some people are products of their environments, but that doesnt mean that underneath they will automatically be sound/nice or a scumbag/knob end. That's more to do with the person and how they we brought up by their family imho

toomevara · 26-04-2010 12:49pm

No members of the BNP...

entropi · 26-04-2010 12:49pm

ToxicPaddy wrote: »

Nope, it wouldn't bother me at all where someone is from.

I'm from a working class background and openly acknowledge it and am proud of it. My parents worked hard to give me a decent upbringing. I have a very neutral accent so you wouldnt know it when you met me and it surprises people a little when they find out..

Pretty much the same situation with me too. I'm from south inner city council housing, grew up living amonsgt drug dealers and bank robbers yet that never changed who I am today. Speaking to me you would never think I had that as my background, my accent is pretty neutral for a Dub, and many many people have even thought I was from outside Dublin.

I've got friends who have plenty of cash in their family, and friends who have little, yet I treat them all the same. As for dating, same situation...they get treated no differently as to how I'd treat anyone else.

Dudess · 26-04-2010 12:53pm

For those who wouldn't date northsiders, it must be quite the dilemma if you meet someone hot from Clontarf (OBVIOUSLY just the part furthest from Fairview :eek:), the posh part of Glasnevin, Malahide, Howth... what the hell do you do to resolve this muddle?