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Would you not date or be Friends with anyone cause of their social background?

24

Comments

  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 11,178 ✭✭✭✭NothingMan


    it wouldn't bother me, as long as they're not assholes i don't mind.


    How dare you . :mad:


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 640 ✭✭✭Michaelrsh


    Calvin Harris explains ...



  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,861 ✭✭✭Irishcrx


    I don't think I would have any issue with it, but then again can you all really say that use would be ok with dating a roman gypsy? And alot of upper class people I have met (Not all) have a very low opinion on the some of the poorer areas in Dublin and would have a massive problem with their sons/daughters dating someone from the area disregardless of how much a nice guy/girl they were, vice versa aswell.

    I once had someone call to the door selling something, can't really remember why and when I answerd the door she asks me where I was from (Coolock) , then she asks originally (Coolock) , then asks where I got my accent from maybe expecting the thick Dublin accent and she found it unbelievable that I was actually well spoken??!


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,404 ✭✭✭Pittens


    And so on. Class has nothing to do with anything.

    We should define terms. how many people would marry someone who left school at 16, has a very strong accent, and comes with tattoos and a bulldog.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 37,214 ✭✭✭✭Dudess


    Pittens wrote: »
    I have lived in Cork. There is a Large Red Wall dividing the Northside from the Southside.
    There isn't really - not unless you choose to buy into that sh1t.
    But the line remains.
    Again, only for those who think that way. You're assuming that everyone thinks that way with your rather presumptuous "no honest answers" claim. Just because "that's the way it is" to you, doesn't mean everyone subscribes to it. So you've encountered a lot of people for whom background matters, it still doesn't mean it matters to everyone.
    I can tell the different accents apart. They are, in fact, radically different. Particuarly Knocknaheeny vs Douglas.
    Well duh...


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 11,222 ✭✭✭✭Marty McFly


    Pittens wrote: »
    We should define terms. how many people would marry someone who left school at 16, has a very strong accent, and comes with tattoos and a bulldog.


    Yeh why wouldnt you? If there personallity matches yours and you find them attractive what would be the problem?


  • Moderators, Business & Finance Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 9,760 Mod ✭✭✭✭ToxicPaddy


    Nope, it wouldn't bother me at all where someone is from.

    I've gone out with girls and have friends from all social classes and types of backgrounds.. and I don't hide the fact either. I don't understand people who are ashamed of their backgrounds..

    I'm from a working class background and openly acknowledge it and am proud of it. My parents worked hard to give me a decent upbringing. I have a very neutral accent so you wouldnt know it when you met me and it surprises people a little when they find out..

    Tox


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 71 ✭✭jkrowling


    Personally it doesn't make a difference, once a person isn't a right jacinta then it doens't matter to me where they come from.

    I have a southside friend who refers to me as her ONF - obligatrry, northside friend and loves me bringing her out to pubs in Finglas and teaching her friends the slang words that me and my group of friends would use. Don't think this was degrading I actually think it's quite funny.

    But on the downside, a few years back (actually many, many moons ago!!), I was seeing this guy from Castleknock, still northside of the river but seen as a more upmarket area than Finglas. At the time he was the love of my life and I thought he felt the same way but a few months into the relationship we broke up because he didn't want me going out with his UCD mates or meeting his family because he couldn't bear the thought of telling them I was from finglas. :eek:


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,404 ✭✭✭Pittens


    Just because "that's the way it is" to you, doesn't mean everyone subscribes to it. So you've encountered a lot of people for whom background matters, it still doesn't mean it matters to everyone.

    I call cant. I said I never heard people dating with northside and southside accents in the city you live in. Not that the people I knew had that prejudice, not that I had ( I was a blowin), but it was clear - because accents are markers of social class - that there was no dating across class lines in Cork.

    Not that there was some, or very little. But none. Absolutely none.

    You on the other hand have dated computer scientists, physics majors, the Earl of Stratford, and the Knocknaheeny chap who has been unemplyed for 20 years and sold some dope on the side.

    Its just everybody else.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 37,214 ✭✭✭✭Dudess


    Pittens wrote: »
    We should define terms. how many people would marry someone who left school at 16, has a very strong accent, and comes with tattoos and a bulldog.
    Not that I honestly consider anything wrong with any of the above - and I really don't before you make assumptions - I thought we were focusing just on where a person comes from?


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,669 ✭✭✭Riddle101


    I don't mind their backround as long as they're not w*nkers or cnuts. I could care less what their social backround is.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 37,214 ✭✭✭✭Dudess


    Pittens wrote: »
    I call cant. I said I never heard people dating with northside and southside accents in the city you live in. Not that the people I knew had that prejudice, not that I had ( I was a blowin), but it was clear - because accents are markers of social class - that there was no dating across class lines in Cork.

    Not that there was some, or very little. But none. Absolutely none.

    You on the other hand have dated computer scientists, physics majors, the Earl of Stratford, and the Knocknaheeny chap who has been unemplyed for 20 years and sold some dope on the side.

    Its just everybody else.
    Lol - I do believe you're TELLING me what my views are. Bye bye...

    Oh just one last thing: what about a guy from Knocknaheeny who HASN'T been unemployed/dealing for the last 20 years? Because THAT, I believe, is what we're focusing on: purely where a person's from/their accent.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 11,996 ✭✭✭✭billymitchell


    jkrowling wrote: »
    Personally it doesn't make a difference, once a person isn't a right jacinta then it doens't matter to me where they come from.

    I have a southside friend who refers to me as her ONF - obligatrry, northside friend and loves me bringing her out to pubs in Finglas and teaching her friends the slang words that me and my group of friends would use. Don't think this was degrading I actually think it's quite funny.

    But on the downside, a few years back (actually many, many moons ago!!), I was seeing this guy from Castleknock, still northside of the river but seen as a more upmarket area than Finglas. At the time he was the love of my life and I thought he felt the same way but a few months into the relationship we broke up because he didn't want me going out with his UCD mates or meeting his family because he couldn't bear the thought of telling them I was from finglas. :eek:

    Looks like you were better off without tbh! ;)

    I dont see what where somebody is from has to do with who they are! Some people are products of their environments, but that doesnt mean that underneath they will automatically be sound/nice or a scumbag/knob end. That's more to do with the person and how they we brought up by their family imho


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,772 ✭✭✭toomevara


    No members of the BNP...


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 21,731 ✭✭✭✭entropi


    ToxicPaddy wrote: »
    Nope, it wouldn't bother me at all where someone is from.

    I'm from a working class background and openly acknowledge it and am proud of it. My parents worked hard to give me a decent upbringing. I have a very neutral accent so you wouldnt know it when you met me and it surprises people a little when they find out..
    Pretty much the same situation with me too. I'm from south inner city council housing, grew up living amonsgt drug dealers and bank robbers yet that never changed who I am today. Speaking to me you would never think I had that as my background, my accent is pretty neutral for a Dub, and many many people have even thought I was from outside Dublin.

    I've got friends who have plenty of cash in their family, and friends who have little, yet I treat them all the same. As for dating, same situation...they get treated no differently as to how I'd treat anyone else.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 37,214 ✭✭✭✭Dudess


    For those who wouldn't date northsiders, it must be quite the dilemma if you meet someone hot from Clontarf (OBVIOUSLY just the part furthest from Fairview :eek:), the posh part of Glasnevin, Malahide, Howth... what the hell do you do to resolve this muddle?


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 712 ✭✭✭arsenallegend


    So is anyone dating or married to anyone from a higher or lower bacKground?


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,675 ✭✭✭hidinginthebush


    Sykk wrote: »
    Hardly.. A question was asked - I answered it. Hate the game, not the player!

    i'll hate the player in this case if it's all the same.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 37,214 ✭✭✭✭Dudess


    So is anyone dating or married to anyone from a higher or lower bacKground?
    Record companies sure as hell hope so:





  • Moderators, Category Moderators, Music Moderators, Politics Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 22,424 CMod ✭✭✭✭Dravokivich


    One should not mix with the help!


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,345 ✭✭✭landsleaving


    I'm dating someone from the northside of Dublin, and I'm from the southside, and one of the wealthier parts of it too. Her family are probably better off than mine though, so go figure. Assuming that which side of a river you live on affects your social class is a bit ridiculous.

    Most people don't advertise their social background, most posters here from so called 'bad' areas say they don't have much of accent, they probably don't wear certain clothes or hairstyles which many in certain areas do (whether upper, middle or lower class) Plenty of people on the northside dress like the southside stereotype and vice versa. I just flatly dislike anyone who defines themselves in this way, rich or poor. If I see uggs, abercrombie and bleached blonde hair or floral print leggings, giant hoop earrings and shortish red or platinum blonde dyed hair, I assume you don't have enough of a personality to seperate yourself from your surroundings.

    Where you come from is irrelevant, it's all about you personally.


  • Posts: 19,205 ✭✭✭✭ [Deleted User]


    So is anyone dating or married to anyone from a higher or lower bacKground?

    This is a very good question - the answer to this effectively answers the question as to whether social background matters or not in terms of being friends or having relationships.
    I think that the answer would prove that it does matter. Society in Ireland, for better or worse is based on prejudices and stereotypes in relation to class and background and that is not going to change anytime soon.
    It's a very complex equation and there will of course be exceptions due to certain factors (money is one).
    + For example - do you think that Robbie Keane from Tallaght would be married to Claudine posh girl from Castleknock if he wasn't a famous and minted soccer player - I doubt it.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 11,178 ✭✭✭✭NothingMan


    I'm from Tallaght. Grew up in a council house with my 6 sisters and brother. Dad was out of work after a broken back. We used butter vouchers and lived off benifits for a number of years. Have socialised with and distanced myself from utter scum. People have been shot, killed, robbed and terrorised on my road.

    My girlfriend lived in Terenure in a huge big house, spent a number of years of her childhood in Belgium, has 1 sis and 1 bro, parents have always worked good jobs. Her bro plays rugby, her sis is an accountant and she is a financier of some description (I really should learn what she actually does, probably involves a WENIS).

    2 very different social backgrounds, 2 very different people, 2 very different childhoods, 1 very happy couple.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 37,214 ✭✭✭✭Dudess


    glasso wrote: »
    For example - do you think that Robbie Keane from Tallaght would be married to Claudine posh girl from Castleknock if he wasn't a famous and minted soccer player - I doubt it.
    Not all posh people from Castleknock are snobs who think Tallaght people are beneath them though.


  • Posts: 19,205 ✭✭✭✭ [Deleted User]


    Dudess wrote: »
    Not all posh people from Castleknock are snobs who think Tallaght people are beneath them though.

    I agree - that's not the point I was making.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 3,327 ✭✭✭Sykk


    i'll hate the player in this case if it's all the same.
    Really?


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 712 ✭✭✭arsenallegend


    Dudess wrote: »
    Not all posh people from Castleknock are snobs who think Tallaght people are beneath them though.

    i suppose you have to ask them Dudess
    i'm a bit iffy but i agree she wouldn't have touched Robbie if he wasn't earning big bucks.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,345 ✭✭✭landsleaving


    i suppose you have to ask them Dudess
    i'm a bit iffy but i agree she wouldn't have touched Robbie if he wasn't earning big bucks.

    He's still a good looking, fit young man. He seems decent enough as well, doesn't have a really thick accent, and doesn't act like a thug, as some footballers do. I'd say he'd have plenty of opportunity with women from Castleknock if he wasn't famous.

    The one he is going out with however, is probably after the money. :p


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 37,214 ✭✭✭✭Dudess


    glasso wrote: »
    I agree - that's not the point I was making.
    Well what I'm saying is, maybe Claudine would go out with Robbie if he wasn't a rich footballer? I know it doesn't seem likely to you and others but nothing's set in stone.


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  • Posts: 19,205 ✭✭✭✭ [Deleted User]


    Dudess wrote: »
    Well what I'm saying is, maybe Claudine would go out with Robbie if he wasn't a rich footballer? I know it doesn't seem likely to you and others but nothing's set in stone.

    yes - this is possible, but unlikely. I was trying to illustrate the fact that norms usually (but not always) predominate and when they don't there's usually (again - not always) an explainable reason.

    Read the first part of my post before the example of the robster - that's my main point.


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