Lets all be anxious/depressed together.

stupidusername

i don't get it as bad as you so. but no i don't think the anxiety would pass

jammstarr

I don't get the physical symptoms as much any more, it makes being anxious somewhat easier to handle.

Princess Peach

I don't get panic attacks too often anymore, but whenever I do they can last up to a half hour. Its horrible!

I can't explain how I deal with it now. If I start to feel anxious over anything I'll get a fear of a bad panic attack, and that fear kinda stops me. I'm pretty good at relaxation techniques too. I mean the severity of them makes me work really hard to prevent them.

howsyourtusk

Everyone is different I suppose. I don't get panic attacks, I just spill it all out and that helps. But it's in situations like stupidusername described, telling a partner or whatever and doesn't end well.

jammstarr

My mother recently broached the subject of weaning myself off my medication eventually. While I don't get the extremes of mood and anxiety anymore I am still very much affected by both. I'm stuck in a rut and the meds are the only things making day to day life more bearable. In the long term, would there be any harm staying on medication? At the moment I'd gladly keep taking them forever as they helping me somewhat.

Princess Peach

With past boyfriends I used to get very anxious when having to talk about serious things or my feelings. They weren't great boyfriends though.

I dunno if its me or him but everything is just so easy with my current man. He is very understanding and wants to hear about my issues, which the others didn't really. Makes things a lot easier! I was in a pretty bad state of mind when we first met but he really helped me through that, even just as a friend at first.

Sul

I used to suffer from panic attacks which as a result made me socially anxious and then I started blushing for no reason all the time. Which made it worse it was a vicious cycle. I got a grip on the panic attacks fairly quickly and can generally stop one before it gets bad but I still blush all the time. I went to cognitive behavioural therapy which helped me loads. I still blush but it thought me not to dwell on it or get so wound up about it. I just let it happen. I dunno if ill ever stop blushing but the therapy helped me to get out of my head and stopped me from always worrying about leaving the house. Just wanted to pass on my info for anyone who may not have tried CBT.

stupidusername

howsyourtusk wrote: »

Everyone is different I suppose. I don't get panic attacks, I just spill it all out and that helps. But it's in situations like stupidusername described, telling a partner or whatever and doesn't end well.

in fairness to him he deals with it quite well. it's more about my fear that i'll push him away. but he doesn't seem to be going anywhere

Gremlinertia

Been a bit quiet the last while, needed to do some stuff in real world. Funny enough my life couldn't be considered that 'bad' at the moment, although the physical pain is ever present, but still there are moments when a wave of something like despair catches me and momentarily i can't breath, the mind is a strange land and i definitely have no map.

Captain Graphite

Princess Peach wrote: »

When I was really down a few years ago I drank all the time. It was a strange thing. At the time my headspace was that I just really wanted to go out and socialise and get out of the house and make friends and have a good time, that it was good for me. And that part of it was. But I also used to drink to the point of a blackout once/twice a week. I always said it was accident, or it was cause of my medication but looking back on it now I couldn't have accidentally gotten that drunk every single time.

It wasn't really a depressant for me though, I did always have a great time and wanted to go out again straight away. Really can't remember a time that alcohol was the reason for me getting down. But def the drinking myself into oblivion was something serious, could never really pinpoint why I did it.

Much better now, have seriously cut back. Mostly because it wasn't healthy and I was so sick of being known as the drunk mess of my town! I still drink once/twice a week with friends but a smart amount, cause I'm old and wise now.

Looking back on your point now Captain Graphite maybe one of the reasons I drank so much and went out so much was because there was nothing else to do. That was what my friends were doing at the time so I followed along. You're good to throw the vodka away, I could never do that in the past! One thing that has really helped me lately is I have switched to drinking beer. I do really like beer but I would drink it slower than vodka, and cause it fills me I don't drink too much of it.

Thankfully I've never got to the stage where I'm blacking out or anything. And I only tend to drink on weekends.

But I can definitely relate to the whole "drinking 'cause there's nothing else to do" thing. I don't think alcohol is even the problem, really; moreso it's loneliness. I drink because I'm bored and then I start feeling lonely and that's hat makes me depressed. If I wasn't drinking, I'd still feel lonely and down. The drink is just an attempt to make me feel less bad about it. Sometimes it works, other times (like last night) it doesn't.

I actually ended up drinking alone again tonight, using the excuse "ah shur it's Easter". :rolleyes: And I was feeling fine until I realised I'd been refreshing my emails and FB pages costantly, hoping someone would leave me a message about something. But nada. Zilch. Also I ended up FB-stalking someone I don't like and got really annoyed about how good looking they are and how many photos with lots of happy looking friends they have. Raaargh. :mad:

Still, rum isn't as harsh as vodka.

howsyourtusk wrote: »

Everyone is different I suppose. I don't get panic attacks, I just spill it all out and that helps. But it's in situations like stupidusername described, telling a partner or whatever and doesn't end well.

When it comes to relationships, I've got to the point where I'm simultaneously desperate to go out with someone and utterly terrified of the prospect. I suppose my current situation means I'm not gonna be seeing anyone for at least another couple of months, so it's irrelevant. Can't help the mind wandering though.

I was completely honest and open with my two exes. More so than I've ever been with anyone else in my life. Both reassured me that they were ok with my personal problems and that they'd support me and help me when I needed it. But both eventually proved themselves incapable of keeping those promises. For two years in a row I ended up getting dumped, out of the blue, right before my birthday. Mightn't sound like the end of the world but it's like I have two massive emotional scars permanently on me the whole time.

First ex had his own problems, and I always tried my hardest to support him. Throughout our relationship he was the one who struggled more, and I always did as much as I could for him. As soon as the tables turned, and I became the one who started to struggle, he decided we were "too emotionally dependent" and ran.

The second ex always told me he didn't care about my problems and that he understood. Throughout our relationship there was very little drama and I was doing really well. Then, after one solitary minor incident, he decided I was "too negative" and he couldn't be with me anymore. And he knew how big a deal it was for me having been dumped right before my birthday but that didn't stop him doing the exact same thing.

I know I've typed out this story before, and people I know (both in real life and in an online capacity) are surely fed up of me saying it over and over again at this stage. But I just can't put those demons to rest. I'm now pretty much scared to trust anyone ever again because they always end up running.

If I could move on from those two relationships and gain confidence to find and trust someone else again, I reckon a lot of my other issues would be helped as a result. Sadly, I can't imagine that happening any time soon....

Princess Peach wrote: »

With past boyfriends I used to get very anxious when having to talk about serious things or my feelings. They weren't great boyfriends though.

I dunno if its me or him but everything is just so easy with my current man. He is very understanding and wants to hear about my issues, which the others didn't really. Makes things a lot easier! I was in a pretty bad state of mind when we first met but he really helped me through that, even just as a friend at first.

stupidusername wrote: »

in fairness to him he deals with it quite well. it's more about my fear that i'll push him away. but he doesn't seem to be going anywhere

Well it's nice to see some relationships go ok even when the black dog is lurking. I hope it works out ok for you both, and they don't end up running from your problems. It'd be nice to have someone like that in my life who actually cared enough to stick around.

cloud493

Hope everyones had a nice easter

nesf

cloud493 wrote: »

Hope everyones had a nice easter

So.. much... chocolate...

cloud493

nesf wrote: »

So.. much... chocolate...

Tis the best part of it!

Kaching

Lucky I didnt get none

cloud493

I wuv chocolate

jammstarr

jammstarr wrote: »

My mother recently broached the subject of weaning myself off my medication eventually. While I don't get the extremes of mood and anxiety anymore I am still very much affected by both. I'm stuck in a rut and the meds are the only things making day to day life more bearable. In the long term, would there be any harm staying on medication? At the moment I'd gladly keep taking them forever as they helping me somewhat.

Is there any problems with taking meds forever?

Does anyone here plan on getting off of them eventually or has tried to before?

Princess Peach

I tried before and it didn't work. My doctor said not to worry, some people just have a longer recovery time. Was supposed to try again around now but with so many changes in my life I don't know if I want to just yet. Going to see a new doctor tomorrow cause I need my prescriptions renewed.

Not sure if I will cut back this year at all, but definitely next year I will try again.

gordon_gekko

does anyone here find it very disheartining that its unlikely you will ever get back to where you were prior to when the depression set in , i have depression since 1998 and before it hit me , i was a confident ( albeit insecure due to upbringing ) twenty year old with a sizeable ego , i dont think its remotley possible i could ever return to where i was as i dont have the ego ( which was borne out of having to have built up confidence entirely by myself ) now to think i deserve to be back where i was , depression makes you too humble , i know being humble is usually regarded as being a good thing but most people cannot live like the dali lama and need a reasonable amount of ego and perhaps arrogance to forge ahead in this cut throat world , looking back i loved it when i had a big ego but when i think about it now , i dont think i could ever be that single minded or self assured again , being forced to settle for second best is tough but i really dont think you have any choice once depression becomes a part of your life , you simply cannot push yourself too hard , your not invincible like you once were or at least thought you were

i know the above is a bit all over the place , sorry

jammstarr

Princess Peach wrote: »

I tried before and it didn't work. My doctor said not to worry, some people just have a longer recovery time. Was supposed to try again around now but with so many changes in my life I don't know if I want to just yet. Going to see a new doctor tomorrow cause I need my prescriptions renewed.

Not sure if I will cut back this year at all, but definitely next year I will try again.

At the moment I'm more than happy to keep swallowing them hand over fist.

gordon_gekko wrote: »

does anyone here find it very disheartining that its unlikely you will ever get back to where you were prior to when the depression set in , i have depression since 1998 and before it hit me , i was a confident ( albeit insecure due to upbringing ) twenty year old with a sizeable ego , i dont think its remotley possible i could ever return to where i was as i dont have the ego ( which was borne out of having to have built up confidence entirely by myself ) now to think i deserve to be back where i was , depression makes you too humble , i know being humble is usually regarded as being a good thing but most people cannot live like the dali lama and need a reasonable amount of ego and perhaps arrogance to forge ahead in this cut throat world , looking back i loved it when i had a big ego but when i think about it now , i dont think i could ever be that single minded or self assured again , being forced to settle for second best is tough but i really dont think you have any choice once depression becomes a part of your life , you simply cannot push yourself too hard , your not invincible like you once were or at least thought you were

i know the above is a bit all over the place , sorry

I get ya man. It's hard to accept at times and it doesn't seem to get any easier

thrilledskinny

gordon_gekko wrote: »

does anyone here find it very disheartining that its unlikely you will ever get back to where you were prior to when the depression set in , i have depression since 1998 and before it hit me , i was a confident ( albeit insecure due to upbringing ) twenty year old with a sizeable ego , i dont think its remotley possible i could ever return to where i was as i dont have the ego ( which was borne out of having to have built up confidence entirely by myself ) now to think i deserve to be back where i was , depression makes you too humble , i know being humble is usually regarded as being a good thing but most people cannot live like the dali lama and need a reasonable amount of ego and perhaps arrogance to forge ahead in this cut throat world , looking back i loved it when i had a big ego but when i think about it now , i dont think i could ever be that single minded or self assured again , being forced to settle for second best is tough but i really dont think you have any choice once depression becomes a part of your life , you simply cannot push yourself too hard , your not invincible like you once were or at least thought you were

i know the above is a bit all over the place , sorry

Yep, find it very disheartening at times, and totally understand what your saying....
Its the confidence thing I think, your confidence is knocked. You think you will never have the same energy and enthusiam to do all the things you used to do...
Its difficult alright....

thrilledskinny

jammstarr wrote: »

Is there any problems with taking meds forever?

Does anyone here plan on getting off of them eventually or has tried to before?

My psyh would say if you had heart problems you woouldnt hesitate taking meds forever.

I must admit i go through phases where I wouldnt dare come off them, and gladly swallow them.
At other times i'd like to see that I can do this on my own. I'd like to be myself unmedicated. I'd like to see what I'm like with out them.

Had been considering coming off them this summer, but for some reason have had a really bad few days of it, and now am wondering should i just stay on them...been feeling so crap was even thinking should i up them.

Its a vicious cycle, that is very disheartening...

No harm trying jammstarr, if thats how you feel, and if your doc agrees eh...

shopaholic01

howsyourtusk wrote: »

Everyone is different I suppose. I don't get panic attacks, I just spill it all out and that helps. But it's in situations like stupidusername described, telling a partner or whatever and doesn't end well.

Are you ok?

jammstarr

thrilledskinny wrote: »

My psyh would say if you had heart problems you woouldnt hesitate taking meds forever.

I must admit i go through phases where I wouldnt dare come off them, and gladly swallow them.
At other times i'd like to see that I can do this on my own. I'd like to be myself unmedicated. I'd like to see what I'm like with out them.

Had been considering coming off them this summer, but for some reason have had a really bad few days of it, and now am wondering should i just stay on them...been feeling so crap was even thinking should i up them.

Its a vicious cycle, that is very disheartening...

No harm trying jammstarr, if thats how you feel, and if your doc agrees eh...

No I don't want to wean off them at all. Was just something my mother said to me that got me wondering about it is all.

gordon_gekko

thrilledskinny wrote: »

Yep, find it very disheartening at times, and totally understand what your saying....
Its the confidence thing I think, your confidence is knocked. You think you will never have the same energy and enthusiam to do all the things you used to do...
Its difficult alright....

being confident doesnt come naturally to you anymore so you have to work ten times as hard to feel good about yourself , youthfull arrogance is a wonderfull thing but once lost cannot be gotten back , depression is a form of death , the old you is gone and you find yourself often mourning for the loss of the old self , i remember a therapist going on about inner child some years ago , i think when depression enters your life , your inner child dies , innocence is lost in a way

Gillo

jammstarr wrote: »

No I don't want to wean off them at all. Was just something my mother said to me that got me wondering about it is all.

Wait until you feel ready and then discuss it with your doctor, it's hard enough coming off so you'll have to gradually phase it.

I'd like to come off at some stage but can see myself staying on for quite a while anyway. If I had to stay in indefinitely or for life it wouldn't bother me apart from one scenario.

jammstarr

Gillo wrote: »

If I had to stay in indefinitely or for life it wouldn't bother me apart from one scenario.

Could I ask what scenario would that be? Sorry for being nosy, am just keen to get all views on this.

Princess Peach

Sometimes I'd love a sponsor, like in AA, to stop me doing stupid things. Or a life coach if I were rich!

Snoopy1

Wow only just found this thread.
Im on anti depressants since January, this has resulted from me being so injured and being a night shift worker, so basically im getting no sleep. Im constantly fed up, have no energy or interest in things
Well there's a bit more to it than that, but that's the short version.
My Mum keeps trying to push me off the tablets. Says "cheer up" and "I dont need to be on them" and "there's worse people out there than me"
I know she means well, but its just really frustrating when people say things like that to me.

Gillo

jammstarr wrote: »

Could I ask what scenario would that be? Sorry for being nosy, am just keen to get all views on this.

Bare in mind that SSRI's affect different people in different ways so what's happening for one person may not be the same for someone else.
Basically, SSRI's are known to change libido, let's just say I can run the race no problem but no matter how far I run I never reach the finish line. At the moment that's actually kinda cool but assuming I settle down and try for kids it's obviously going to be a problem. Also since I'm single it's really no issue for me at the moment.

(mods, hope this point isn't crossing the line if so edit/ delete it- and yes pun intended).

neemish

I'm relieved to hear other people saying what i feel about meds. I feel like they're both my friend and foe.
I recently came off my meds cold turkey, against medical advice. It was NOT a pretty sight. Within a fortnight I was a complete mess. The worst part were the Jekyll and Hyde like mood swings. I never knew how I was going to be.
What was nice though was feeling more like "me" at times. My sense of taste was normal, I could actually taste my food. Plus I never knew that most people want to have sex! I wasn't more awake, I was more aware of everything. My senses were heightened.

That said, this was my moment of madness. I wanted to see what I'd be like. I was curious. My consultant was not a happy camper when he found out. In fact, I had to go into hospital the mood swings were so bad. The moral of the story: don't go cold turkey. Ever. Talk to your doctor about your concerns.

And yes, I'm back on the dreaded meds.