Lets all be anxious/depressed together.

nesf

Rawrrrrrrrrrrr wrote: »

I am going to my doctor. I just want to know is it a bad idea to say that or just to say that Im depressed. I have a 2 year old so I cant leave him.

They take these things into account. It's a good idea to say you're depressed, these things shouldn't be left untreated! No one but a doctor could tell you whether or not you should go into hospital at the moment, you won't be able to get an answer on here.

degausserxo

Rawrrrrrrrrrrr wrote: »

If you were to go to your GP and say you're so depressed that you felt like killing yourself last week what would they do? Can they send you to hospital if you don't want to go? Even if the danger has passed?

From my experience, since the immediate danger had passed I was asked to come up to the psych outpatient clinic I attend during the week, and a nurse came over on the Saturday and Sunday while the clinic was closed. Was told to go to the hospital if it got bad again though.

loveisdivine

Sometimes I get so worried about stupid first world problems, that my heart feels like its literally going to burst out of my chest.

It's like I can feel it heaving, I feel a pressure on my chest.

Gillo

Rawrrrrrrrrrrr wrote: »

I am going to my doctor. I just want to know is it a bad idea to say that or just to say that Im depressed. I have a 2 year old so I cant leave him.

You are much better off being honest with the doctor, so they realise how serious the depression is affecting you. Can anyone mind your child if indeed you did have to go in. From experience my counsellor only realised how bad I was when I told her about being suicidal.

As for the question about food, I find in I don't eat I get both tired and moody, to the point where I've actually told someone in work if he notices I am getting grumpy to tell me to go out and get a chocolate bar or something. The poor guy about a week later, did what I asked, I replied "f&€k off", but yeah enough food can make a difference, also vitamin d, is meant to help lift your mood, best source for it is sunlight appearently.

Mood isn't great today, been fairly low. I finally got a date to see the company doctor so can put that to bed after next week.

cloud493

I do writing when I'm feeling pretty bad, I did a new poem yesterday, but I can't seem to muster one up tonight

nesf

Today has been my worst day in two weeks or more.

Kaching

nesf wrote: »

Today has been my worst day in two weeks or more.

My worst day in months

nesf

Kaching wrote: »

My worst day in months

Yeah, no suicidal thinking is the only reason it's not the same for me.

Rosiestar

Yesterday was a real battle for me, really bad, thought I was losing my mind again. Today is not much better, but not as bad as yesterday so that is a slight plus. Got to take what I can get.

Same old bleak feeling envelops me. A feeling that has become so familiar to me over the last 21 years. Will this ever leave for good?

nesf

Rosiestar wrote: »

Same old bleak feeling envelops me. A feeling that has become so familiar to me over the last 21 years. Will this ever leave for good?

My mother "grew out of it." Battles with depression and anxiety in her 20s and 30s, by her 50s she was symptom free pretty much. It might come back for her yet but for the past 20 years she's been doing pretty well.


I'm having another bad day. Low, ruminating and miserable. Constantly being assailed by plans for self-harm.

Aoifums

Best day in a week. That's not saying much as I'm still horribly anxious, exhausted and freezing but my mood is nowhere near as low as it has been lately. Delighted

I love Cake

Hey Guys,
I spent many an evening perusing this forum, searching for solace in the words of others. I never posted before because I was often unable to even form words, never mind sentences! Your collective posts often gave me the strength to keep going and whenever I feel down I come on here, just to not feel alone. Thanks for your insight!!! I recently wrote an article I think might interest some of ye:
http://galway.studenty.me/2012/02/08/campaign-to-end-the-the-stigma-of-mental-illness/

Princess Peach

I love Cake wrote: »

Hey Guys,
I spent many an evening perusing this forum, searching for solace in the words of others. I never posted before because I was often unable to even form words, never mind sentences! Your collective posts often gave me the strength to keep going and whenever I feel down I come on here, just to not feel alone. Thanks for your insight!!! I recently wrote an article I think might interest some of ye:
http://galway.studenty.me/2012/02/08/campaign-to-end-the-the-stigma-of-mental-illness/

You've got a really nice way with words in the article there, must have taken a lot of time and effort. Be proud of yourself for being brave and focused. Seems like you have a family that care too. I know myself sometimes this "ceaseless assistance" as you say can seem overwhelming and pointless and for me, often really annoying! But I just had to keep in mind it was their way of trying to help and they had the best intentions. I wish the best for you in your battles

I got this off Facebook. I really liked the wording at the start, and it was posted by my boyfriend and I knew he meant for it to make me feel better. Great to know someone is thinking of me.



Had my worst panic attack the other day but looking back on it a few hours later, I opened my law book and studied and did ok in the test I think. I've missed a few exams in the past because of my illness, but I was really proud of myself to pull my strength back like that. And I didn't even realise what I had done till yesterday evening. I just realised that if that had happened a couple of years ago I would have stayed in bed for a week.

girlonfire

This up and down cycle seems like it will never go away. It certainly feels that way at the moment. I'm going through a really rough patch and old issues are re-surfacing.
I've really hurt someone I care dearly about and it's just adding to the stress. I hate that I let my issues get the better of what I have/had with this person. College isn't going very well either. I'll keep trying, but jesus it's getting tiring:(

stupidusername

I had my first CBT meeting last night. though with absolutely no CBT. It was really just an introduction between the two of us. I'm hoping next time I'll actually be doing something. though my next appointment isn't for a few weeks. which is fairly annoying, but i have no choice.

Aoifums

I spoke way to soon earlier. I'm just whining now but I feel ****e. My parents are downstairs and I have to go talk to them at some point. I'm "studying" in my room now so I've had peace and quiet all evening. Not in the mood for food but I haven't eaten much all day so I'm fairly sure they're going to try get me to eat something. I just want to get today over and done with but I will wake up in a few hours time if I go to bed now

Quester

Ok, so i'm typing here as i'm having an anxiety attack, and actually typing something that people will see has sometimes stopped me from doing irrational things, like pounding my fist on the desk or shouting out a word. not sure why i do these things but it happens when i'm in a state and in a room on my own.

now i have this deep deep feeling that i've done something horrible, but i KNOW i haven't. Its sad, no matter that i'm 100% sure i have had a good day, but last night i had similar feelings and couldn't sleep. ended up cleaning my kitchen at 7 this morning. Not exactly an odd hour but with no sleep it felt like 4 am.

Then i get really sleepy, but no power to get to bed, then seconds later, my hearts racing and my eyes are tearing up. Have had depression for years, probably longer but then we all put it down to being a teenager and being quiet. I know later, and tomorrow i might just sleep right through, as is my normal recovery from this, but its the mind racing, the constant questioning of my actions... thats going to keep me up for a while yet.

Ok, i'm done for the moment.

midlandsmissus

I would love to know if anyone has the same feelings as me.

I have days when I can function and days when I'm severely depressed.

The days when I'm severely depressed I'm in absolute mental anguish, I am absolutely tortured.

I'm trying to analyse what actually happens to me in my depressed moments to make me feel tortured, and it is this.

I have non-stop unrelenting thoughts that I am a hateful person, that I am horrificly bad. I think I am crazy, I am a psycho, not normal enough to be around other normal people. People will find out how bad I am, and hate me.

It's sad reading the above , but that's what non-stop goes through my mind, and the mental whirl is exhausting, I can't escape from myself - the horrific person I see myself as - until thoughts of suicide come in as a possible means of escape.

Note- Not to worry anyone, I am not suicidal, I have suicidal thoughts at these times, but there is a big difference between having thoughts of I wish the pain would stop, and having a serious plan to do it. And I am not planning to do it. I suppose my thoughts are more: I would give anything to escape this pain, this mental torture, this reality. Not 'I actually want to kill myself'.

I'm just exhausted. I am on antidepressants and still feel like this. I would mainly describe myself as tired. I am tired. It's exhausting living with yourself when you hate yourself.

Quester

same thoughts here midlandsmissus, your not on your own at all there

Gillo

girlonfire wrote: »

This up and down cycle seems like it will never go away. It certainly feels that way at the moment. I'm going through a really rough patch and old issues are re-surfacing.

I thought I was doing okish the last few weeks, but old things started coming back this week, it's crap isn't it. Now my moods getting dragged back down.

midlandsmissus

Quester wrote: »

same thoughts here midlandsmissus, your not on your own at all there

That's reassuring, though at the same time I'm sorry to hear that.

I say reassuring, because I think one of the worst aspects of depression is thinking you're completely alone in what you're feeling, in that you're different to everyone else.

Would you mind sharing with me what you think at your worst times?

degausserxo

Must go back to the doctor next week. Last thing I remember last night I took the prescribed amount of the sleeping tablet I'm on, and don't remember anything else. Took tablets at tenish, woke up at two so I missed everything I was supposed to go, and I don't remember anything in between, but now I just came across the box of tablets, completely empty. How or when I took the other 26 is absolutely beyond me.

Kaching

Aoifums wrote: »

I spoke way to soon earlier. I'm just whining now but I feel ****e. My parents are downstairs and I have to go talk to them at some point. I'm "studying" in my room now so I've had peace and quiet all evening. Not in the mood for food but I haven't eaten much all day so I'm fairly sure they're going to try get me to eat something. I just want to get today over and done with but I will wake up in a few hours time if I go to bed now

If I could wrap my arms around you and tell you it will all be better without seeming like a hypocrite then I would
but right now I cant tell myself that hun , but I do hope it improves for you

talullah

aaaaarrrrrrrrrgggghhhhhhhh......having such a s**t time, the last couple days especially. I cant even describe how i feel right now, i just want to curl up and disappear. Didnt help myself when i went to the shop i work in today for milk, walked through the section i pack and someone else had been packing it, things in the wrong place, squashed in all messy, it was awful i stood fixing it for a few minutes until i nearly broke down and i had to leave it got too much. Feel like such a freak, i just want it all to stop.

midlandsmissus

degausserxo wrote: »

Must go back to the doctor next week. Last thing I remember last night I took the prescribed amount of the sleeping tablet I'm on, and don't remember anything else. Took tablets at tenish, woke up at two so I missed everything I was supposed to go, and I don't remember anything in between, but now I just came across the box of tablets, completely empty. How or when I took the other 26 is absolutely beyond me.

Dude are you ok? Are you saying you took 27 tablets?

degausserxo

midlandsmissus wrote: »

degausserxo wrote: »

Must go back to the doctor next week. Last thing I remember last night I took the prescribed amount of the sleeping tablet I'm on, and don't remember anything else. Took tablets at tenish, woke up at two so I missed everything I was supposed to go, and I don't remember anything in between, but now I just came across the box of tablets, completely empty. How or when I took the other 26 is absolutely beyond me.

Dude are you ok? Are you saying you took 27 tablets?

Yeah I'm fine thanks. 28- the whole prescription that I only just got. Thankfully they were only 5mg and I've a really high threshold for tablets. Can't bear to think what would've happened if the pharmacy hadn't have been out of 10mgs. So lucky.

I've been taking these on and off for five years though, and nothing like this has ever happened before. Apparently people do very strange things on them, because taking them all was definitely not intentional. I'll be giving them to my mam to mind from now on.

LegacyUser

Every day gets longer
I don't want to get out of bed
thoughts that are so scary
running through my head

get up and go I tell myself
stop feeling so so bad
but thoughts keep on appearing
they just make me feel so sad

fintonagirl

been awake since about 5. was sure I was woken up by my door bell.. but now I think about it I don't think I have a door bell! I thought I could hear an intruder in the house and sat for good while with heart in mouth, next to front window so could shout for help. eventually checked it out and there is noone here but feel too anxious still to sleep... I had mad dreams last night as well. Feeling in a real quandry, have to decide today whether am able to go back to work tomorrow and feel sick at thought of it but still with more time off I reckon its only going to get harder..

hope everyone else managed a good night sleep

Rosiestar

Have noticed a pattern of early morning wakening, around about 5am or so and can't get back to sleep. Never a good sign. I'm up since and it's now 8.26am, feel so tired, but doubt I will sleep even if I do go back to bed.

Another long day of nothingness ahead, its only when I get this bad that I realise that I did actually have 'good' days. I wish I had appreciated them more now.

girlonfire

Gillo wrote: »

I thought I was doing okish the last few weeks, but old things started coming back this week, it's crap isn't it. Now my moods getting dragged back down.

Sorry to hear that Gillo. It really is crap. Things feel okay (which is starting to feel more like a state of suspension - waiting for the fall). That feeling of being dragged back down is horrible. Jesus, I wish I had a magic wand at the moment.