So, what you playing at the mo? Retro Edition

Steve X2 · 19-01-2012 1:35pm

CiDeRmAn wrote: »

Or, controversially, just get it on the DC!
Just thought I'd throw that one out there, revolutionary I know [/sarcasm]

But they always look at me weird when I try to hook up my DC while in the plane

Seriously though I of course have it on the DC and that's the best way to play it. I even have a DC setup in my candy with some hacked pad and that's a thing of beauty.

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The Last Bandit · 19-01-2012 1:51pm

Conkers Bad Fur Day (N64), what's not to like about a foul mouthed squirrel

Pricey though, cart cost about the same as all the others combined..

Retr0gamer · 19-01-2012 2:03pm

The Last Bandit wrote: »

Conkers Bad Fur Day (N64), what's not to like about a foul mouthed squirrel

I don't know? The fact that all the humour is just ripping off scenes from films and the humour never gets above the level of fart jokes and is really poorly written? That and the game is kind of rubbish. One of the most over rated games ever for me.

Andrew76 · 19-01-2012 2:08pm

Steve SI wrote: »

But they always look at me weird when I try to hook up my DC while in the plane

Seriously though I of course have it on the DC and that's the best way to play it. I even have a DC setup in my candy with some hacked pad and that's a thing of beauty.

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Very nice sir.

The Last Bandit · 19-01-2012 2:14pm

Retr0gamer wrote: »

I don't know? The fact that all the humour is just ripping off scenes from films and the humour never gets above the level of fart jokes and is really poorly written? That and the game is kind of rubbish. One of the most over rated games ever for me.

But but but its got toilet humour and a squirrel that swears (I'm easily amused). Ah its a relief from the more mainstream oh-so-serious stuff that's so common place now.

Anyone else to scared to play Dead Space ?

CiDeRmAn · 19-01-2012 6:45pm

Don't mind grumpy old Retr0, Conker is great fun, a real tonic after the mess of Donkey Kong 64. Some fun voice acting as well, at a time when the industry was in its infancy.
The movie piss takes were all fun and it was quite explicit that this was the case. I particularly had fun in the Matrix and the country barn

johnny_ultimate · 19-01-2012 9:14pm

I'm pretty sure the argument of 'Conker's Bad Fur Day = The Scary Movie of gaming' has been had elsewhere on this thread, so I won't repeat it

Retr0gamer · 19-01-2012 9:24pm

The height of Bad Fur Day humour:

Oh look, he farted. Except he's a squirrel!
Oh look it's singing. Except it's a ****!
Oh look it's hungover. Except it's a squirrel!
Oh look Saving Private Ryan. But with Squirrels!
Oh look the Matrix. But with Squirrels!

Even the kind of clever fourth wall breaking moment at the end of the game isn't funny because of such poor delivery and writing.

o1s1n · 19-01-2012 10:16pm

Oh look! It's Retr0 giving out! But with Squirrels!

johnny_ultimate · 19-01-2012 10:23pm

Why you hatin' on squirrels retr0? All those damn hedgehogs hogging the attention.

CiDeRmAn · 19-01-2012 10:44pm

Haters gotta hate....

It's an improvement on the "stick googly eyes" approach to character building Rare usually take.
And it's a lot more fun than Retr0 thinks too.
The Poo song is a work of art, or is that fart?
The business with the horny bee.
The Shaving Ryans Privates pastiche.
The "context sensitive" gag

It takes the likes of Mario 64 and takes the piss, and does it well imho.
I mean, sure, the humour is, at times, literally toilet humour but I liked it.
I have the N64 cart, finished it, and the Xbox revision as well.

I wonder, if most of the people who have played it have actually played it all the way through, or is it just Youtube clips?

Oh, giving the cows the squits is fun too!

Really, it is mostly derivative, in the same way that most 3D platformers since SM64 are derivative.
Go there, flick the switch, make the platform rise, collect this many of that to get the door to unlock etc, no different here but the visuals are very nice and it is done with a nice attention to detail, check out the Dracula level, and gives different gameplay in different levels.

Retr0gamer · 19-01-2012 11:12pm

Ugh, the context sensitive gag that they dragged out for what felt like 10 minutes long after it had stopped being unfunny and got annoying because all you wanted to do was play the fupping game and not listen to terrible jokes. CBFD has no right to have a lame go at Ocarina of Time because it's crap. It's as bad as the DNF taking the piss out of Dead Space and Halo.

Retr0gamer · 19-01-2012 11:14pm

Videogame writing and pacing at it's ****tiest:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ylFTrZrwMs4

eddhorse · 20-01-2012 12:18am

Anyone else to scared to play Dead Space ?

So I'm not the only one ! Ed turns on all the lights...

Retr0gamer · 20-01-2012 1:00am

Filled with confidence after absolutely thrashing Contra I decided to see what other NES games weren't as hard as they are let on to be. So I started Ninja Gaiden. It really is a walk in the park, you've plenty of energy, the bosses are easy.... Nah I'm lying. Fuck Ninja Gaiden. I'm currently tearing my hair out at stage 5-3.

Retr0gamer · 20-01-2012 1:58am

Well there it ****ing is. On the last stage composed of 4 of the hardest stages ever devised Ninja Gaiden, a game filled with more dick moves than any other videogame ever, pulls videogamings biggest dick moves. When you die on the last boss instead of restarting at the beginning of the last stage you are kicked back to 6-1. I feel like crying.

Retr0gamer · 20-01-2012 3:51am

Finally beat. The last boss is just unreal. The first form isn't too tough. However it's the second form that's the problem. Not only does he have one of the most horrible and hard to avoid attack patterns in any game ever there's also a bug in the game that completely dicks you over. When you get to this guy no matter how many lives you have, if you die you are sent right back to 6-1, even if you have lives yet. So it means ever 30 minutes or so you get one shot at this guy and it will take you a good 10-15 goes to figure out a pattern and then a good 10-15 more to actually take him down. There's another boss afterwards but he is a pushover.

So how did I manage to beat it so quickly? I used save states for the last boss after repeating 6-1, 6-2 and 6-3 too many times. **** it, that's just too much bull**** to take.

As for the difficulty, screw contra, this is the real deal. However Contra is fair in its difficulty, Ninja Gaiden is a whore. It actually uses its bad programming in the level design to dick you over. If an enemy spawn location is right at the edge of the screen it will constantly spawn in every time you will kill it. So the asshole level designer made some jumps later on that use this for some of the most horrible obstacles you'll ever see in gaming. Play it and once you hit 5-X, 6-X you'll understand.

I enjoyed it but I never want to play it again.

Myrddin · 20-01-2012 10:07am

Retr0gamer wrote: »

Finally beat. The last boss is just unreal. The first form isn't too tough. However it's the second form that's the problem. Not only does he have one of the most horrible and hard to avoid attack patterns in any game ever there's also a bug in the game that completely dicks you over. When you get to this guy no matter how many lives you have, if you die you are sent right back to 6-1, even if you have lives yet. So it means ever 30 minutes or so you get one shot at this guy and it will take you a good 10-15 goes to figure out a pattern and then a good 10-15 more to actually take him down. There's another boss afterwards but he is a pushover.

So how did I manage to beat it so quickly? I used save states for the last boss after repeating 6-1, 6-2 and 6-3 too many times. **** it, that's just too much bull**** to take.

As for the difficulty, screw contra, this is the real deal. However Contra is fair in its difficulty, Ninja Gaiden is a whore. It actually uses its bad programming in the level design to dick you over. If an enemy spawn location is right at the edge of the screen it will constantly spawn in every time you will kill it. So the asshole level designer made some jumps later on that use this for some of the most horrible obstacles you'll ever see in gaming. Play it and once you hit 5-X, 6-X you'll understand.

I enjoyed it but I never want to play it again.

I salute you. That is one tramp of a game. I got to 5x before & had enough, must go back and attempt the unattemptable

CiDeRmAn · 20-01-2012 10:24am

Retr0gamer wrote: »

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ylFTrZrwMs4

And I really enjoyed that stuff!
If you simply don't like the writing or the pacing then fine but I thought it was just fine, the cut scenes were part of a very much story driven game.

Also, might I add, that thing is rendered on the N64, not the later Xbox version, and looks mighty fine too.
Again, it's easily on par with the Banjo games, but with more variety, and it's streets ahead of DK64.

Retr0gamer · 20-01-2012 11:34am

EnterNow wrote: »

I salute you. That is one tramp of a game. I got to 5x before & had enough, must go back and attempt the unattemptable

5-x is when the game starts to get absolutely hair pullingly hard. I think I'll play the japanese version of ninja gaiden 2. 5 credits to beat the US version? **** right off.

CiDeRmAn wrote: »

Also, might I add, that thing is rendered on the N64, not the later Xbox version, and looks mighty fine too.
Again, it's easily on par with the Banjo games, but with more variety, and it's streets ahead of DK64.

That is one thing I'll give it credit for, it's technically impressive and despite not using the ram expansion it looks like it really should be using it.

o1s1n · 20-01-2012 1:02pm

Retr0gamer wrote: »

So how did I manage to beat it so quickly? I used save states for the last boss after repeating 6-1, 6-2 and 6-3 too many times. **** it, that's just too much bull**** to take..

Boo! That doesn't count

Fair play to you man, it's a bitch of a game alright. A mate of mine (with a really short temper) had it when we were kids. In the end he got so angry that one day he threw his NES down the staircase.

I don't know how, but the console still worked fine afterwards.

Retr0gamer · 20-01-2012 1:03pm

Word of warning to people trying Ninja Gaiden. If you want to take the last boss on and some of the trickier sections of the last stage you are going to need a very good d-pad. I was playing on the Wii with the pro controller but the d-pad wasn't up to it but switching to th Wiimote on its side was much better. The last few stages require some awkward wall climbing that just isn't possible with a **** controller.

Myrddin · 24-01-2012 6:20pm

The controls in Blazing Angels are absolutely horrific. Coming from Battlestations Midway & then IL2, these new controls are unplayable I'm finding. Such a shame, they've made the game worse than it could have been.

There's no rudder control, only a roll direction :mad:

pdbhp · 24-01-2012 6:58pm

EnterNow wrote: »

The controls in Blazing Angels are absolutely horrific. Coming from Battlestations Midway & then IL2, these new controls are unplayable I'm finding. Such a shame, they've made the game worse than it could have been.

There's no rudder control, only a roll direction :mad:

You should try play it on the Wii, christ the controls blow big time on Wii

Steve X2 · 25-01-2012 2:55pm

Playing a bit of Disposable Hero on the CD32 today. I was trying out a new CD32 I got last week and decided to play 5 mins of this, 2 hours later still at it.
If the pixels/screen look a bit weird/different its because I was playing on a trusty Commodore monitor from 1982(I just love how the pixels look on this thing). Still works perfectly after all these years and the picture quality is just mental for such an old screen. Pics don't do it justice.

Click the pic for the monster full size image(retro pixels, Mmmmm):

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Andrew76 · 25-01-2012 2:59pm

That looks delicious esp the bigger image. Thank god retro monitors and CRTs have solid build quality to last this long.

Steve X2 · 25-01-2012 3:02pm

Andrew76 wrote: »

That looks delicious esp the bigger image. Thank god retro monitors and CRTs have solid build quality to last this long.

Yeah, they're tough as nails. I picked this up a few years ago from a guy on adverts or buy and sell(cant really remember).
He'd spray painted it black. But I've learned to live with it and at least it hasn't yellowed

Edit:

More retro pixel goodness(click the pic for the full size version).

The pixels do look very weird up close, but I like the effect.

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Mr.Saturn · 04-02-2012 1:35am

I'm whizzing through Sonic CD and Sonic Generations concurrently. I'm finding Generations to be a bit more engaging, not to say I'm not digging CD, but am left with the slight impression that a lot of its luster can be attributed to the fact it was a standout title on a relative flop of a platform.

CiDeRmAn · 04-02-2012 8:46am

Loved the review of Sonic Generations on Zero Punctuation, very funny...

Myrddin · 05-02-2012 8:53pm

Played a bit of Mr. Gimmick today via the wonders of emulation. Retr0 is right about it, it's 'bastard hard'. But I can see its a rewarding game if you put the effort into it, graphics & soundtrack are as amazing as they are made out to be.

Also tried Dirt 3 on the pc today. It's actually pretty damned good.

So, what you playing at the mo? Retro Edition

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