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any decent sick excuses?!!

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    #62
    Sleipnir
    Registered Users Posts: 5,514 ✭✭✭Sleipnir


    nicegirl wrote: »
    Some of us are genuinely unwell from time to time, and trying to come up with a genuine excuse for being not able to attend work actually offends me, and people Im sure who are genuinely unwell from time to time.... im unwell every so often, and people who pretend to be unwell just makes people who are genuinely unwell seem like "Frauds", so i dont really appreciate you post.

    I am a genuinely nice girl but post like this make me angry, i am treated terribly at work, and am about to start legal proceedings because of how I have been treated at work because of a disability I have, because I have a genuine disability, and people who place posts like this do not help or improve the situation at work for people who are genuinely unwell.....

    +1. I mean, a day or two every couple of years but you use up your 20 or so holidays and then decide to take another two weeks!
    OP, I hope you get found out.


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    #63
    ScumLord
    Registered Users Posts: 28,789 ✭✭✭✭ScumLord


    Sleipnir wrote: »
    +1. I mean, a day or two every couple of years but you use up your 20 or so holidays and then decide to take another two weeks!
    OP, I hope you get found out.
    A day or two?? Jesus they really have you by the gonads. **** them, they don't own you. If you want a day to yourself you should be fully entitled to it. Why spend your whole life busting your balls to make some rich **** richer.

    Don't be a slave. Work is a means to and end, not the point of existence.


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    #64
    consultech
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,956 ✭✭✭consultech


    ScumLord wrote: »
    A day or two?? Jesus they really have you by the gonads. **** them, they don't own you. If you want a day to yourself you should be fully entitled to it. Why spend your whole life busting your balls to make some rich **** richer.

    Don't be a slave. Work is a means to and end, not the point of existence.

    I'm sure that maxim works spendidly well for you behind the counter of xtravision/paddy power/other post substitutable by way of monkey - But some people actually have jobs that require them to be there when they're supposed to be, whether it be for upkeep of client relationships, urgent daily business demands etc.

    TBH I partook in the joking about what excuse to give, but I also agree with the poster above regarding the fact that it impacts very negatively on people who are actually sick. OP Why don't you quit your job and let someone more deserving/bothered have it in ths difficult time?

    I don't exactly know what you're expecting to happen when you come back off your 2 weeks mystery illness with a tan?


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    #65
    C0ward
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 75 ✭✭C0ward


    Yeast infection


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    #66
    mikemac
    Closed Accounts Posts: 19,986 ✭✭✭✭mikemac


    OP, you are going to get sacked if you do this, it's pretty certain.

    If you are determined to go on holidays, quit your job now.
    If you are lucky you'll get "gardening leave"

    Well in my job that's how it's done.
    Once you hand in your notice you grab your jacket and are escorted off the premises. I've seen it happen several times. And since it's a months notice you get one month paid to sit at home, score!
    Kinda pointless as if you wanted to steal lists of clients you've have done it weeks before ;)

    So quit your job OP and aim for gardening leave.
    And somebody who actually wants your job can have it.


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    #67
    ninjasurfer1
    Registered Users Posts: 485 ✭✭ninjasurfer1


    nicegirl wrote: »
    Some of us are genuinely unwell from time to time, and trying to come up with a genuine excuse for being not able to attend work actually offends me, and people Im sure who are genuinely unwell from time to time.... im unwell every so often, and people who pretend to be unwell just makes people who are genuinely unwell seem like "Frauds", so i dont really appreciate you post.

    I am a genuinely nice girl but post like this make me angry, i am treated terribly at work, and am about to start legal proceedings because of how I have been treated at work because of a disability I have, because I have a genuine disability, and people who place posts like this do not help or improve the situation at work for people who are genuinely unwell.....

    If you're "genuinely" unwell, surely you can get a "genuine" medical cert without having to make up a "genuine Excuse"??


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    #68
    Sleipnir
    Registered Users Posts: 5,514 ✭✭✭Sleipnir


    ScumLord wrote: »
    A day or two?? Jesus they really have you by the gonads. **** them, they don't own you. If you want a day to yourself you should be fully entitled to it. Why spend your whole life busting your balls to make some rich **** richer.

    Don't be a slave. Work is a means to and end, not the point of existence.


    I wasn't actually looking for a life-coach but thanks


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    #69
    seclachi
    Closed Accounts Posts: 510 ✭✭✭seclachi


    ScumLord wrote: »
    A day or two?? Jesus they really have you by the gonads. **** them, they don't own you. If you want a day to yourself you should be fully entitled to it. Why spend your whole life busting your balls to make some rich **** richer.

    Don't be a slave. Work is a means to and end, not the point of existence.

    Yeah, lets stick it to those capitalist pigs !

    Running a business is alot different to being a worker, you arent afforded anything like the same protection that an employee is given. At the end of the day they provide jobs, and if what comes in doesnt match what comes out they go under, taking more work with them.

    The point of this being, somebody who just disappears from the job every so often is a liabilty and can loose a company alot of money, so I wouldnt expect to get any significant work with an attitude like this, who wants to give an important task to somebody who may just have a pillow day ?


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    #70
    MarkR
    Moderators, Regional Midwest Moderators Posts: 11,054 Mod ✭✭✭✭MarkR


    Tell them you had to get your male sex organs removed. As it was only a teenchy one, two weeks should suffice.


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    #71
    pacman.podge
    Closed Accounts Posts: 130 ✭✭pacman.podge


    phone in dead


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    #72
    GG66
    Registered Users Posts: 712 ✭✭✭GG66


    My Granny Died ...
    Actually it was my other granny ...
    erm .. my girlfriend had a miscarriage ....

    Seriously with people losing jobs on a daily basis you deserve to be sacked simply for having your attitude ...

    But on the other hand if you are sacked someone who deserves a job may get it so:

    catch a viral infection ..
    puking and diahorea for weeks on end .
    bedridden

    or mental illness such as Depression ...

    No one wants to talk about either...

    Shame on you


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    #73
    Paddo81
    Closed Accounts Posts: 132 ✭✭Paddo81


    Depression is a good one. I know a guy who went to the Doc and told him his job was depressing him so much he was having "dark thoughts" He then got a sick cert for 6 or 8 weeks and prompty f@cked off on a round the world trip or something with afew friends. Apparently he came back and all was well in his job.

    Its completely dependant on the job you do, are you dowithoutable etc etc. If your in a half decent job that pays ok, I wouldnt risk it over a holiday. Holidays are temporary, the recession is forever!


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    #74
    dotsman
    Registered Users Posts: 3,635 ✭✭✭dotsman


    Paddo81 wrote: »
    Holidays are temporary, the recession is forever!

    Nonsense. I'm predicting another boom in 2023:)


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    #75
    sub-x
    Closed Accounts Posts: 199 ✭✭sub-x


    BVB wrote: »
    I know a guy that used depression to as an excuse to get off work for 3 weeks.

    Look up what it consists of then go to the doctor and he will give you a Sick cert


    :D In some cases this is true,when you say that the job is the cause of your depression or one of the main causes coupled with a troubled home life for example but one of the things that helps people with depression is to work,routine etc. etc.


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    #76
    T-K-O
    Registered Users Posts: 6,309 ✭✭✭T-K-O


    moretothegirl wrote: »
    ok so long story short: not allowed take hols from work but i booked one anyway for 2 weeks which means im likely to be fired!! any excuses you can come up with to call in sick that might be believable???!!!

    I was typing an excuse but then I thought - you're ****ed nobody is sick for two weeks.


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    #77
    Mr. Presentable
    Closed Accounts Posts: 9,496 ✭✭✭Mr. Presentable


    F off on your holidays. Let someone who gives a sh7t have your job.

    Stand outside the dole office with a sign saying what you posted originally.


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    #78
    itsallaboutheL
    Closed Accounts Posts: 11,333 ✭✭✭✭itsallaboutheL


    Sorry for missing two weeks of work
    I was riding a cat.............



    Thats a pretty sick excuse


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    #79
    waraf
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,326 ✭✭✭waraf


    Paddo81 wrote: »
    Its completely dependant on the job you do, are you dowithoutable etc etc. If your in a half decent job that pays ok, I wouldnt risk it over a holiday. Holidays are temporary, the recession is forever!

    Everybody can be replaced. These days there is a queue of more qualified, more experienced and cheaper people willing to take many of jobs. A couple of weeks holidays is not worth the possibility of being unemployed for an indefinite amount of time.


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    #80
    ScumLord
    Registered Users Posts: 28,789 ✭✭✭✭ScumLord


    consultech wrote: »
    I'm sure that maxim works spendidly well for you behind the counter of xtravision/paddy power/other post substitutable by way of monkey - But some people actually have jobs that require them to be there when they're supposed to be, whether it be for upkeep of client relationships, urgent daily business demands etc.
    Very, very few people have critical jobs. Private sector work is rarely all that important, if your not working a job that peoples lives depend on then I don't see what the big deal is. Corporations these days squeeze their employees and I don't think it's right. It is just the way things are at the moment but it's still not right.


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    #81
    Capt'n Midnight
    Moderators, Recreation & Hobbies Moderators, Science, Health & Environment Moderators, Technology & Internet Moderators Posts: 90,746 Mod ✭✭✭✭Capt'n Midnight


    tell them you are taking a weekend visit to the place you are going on holiday to

    bribe doctor there to give you cert for malaria or something

    expect to get ratted on by anyone jealous of you or looking for a promotion to your job


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    #82
    T-K-O
    Registered Users Posts: 6,309 ✭✭✭T-K-O


    Capt'n Midnight wrote: »
    tell them you are taking a weekend visit to the place you are going on holiday to

    bribe doctor there to give you cert for malaria or something

    expect to get ratted on by anyone jealous of you or looking for a promotion to your job

    That's what i was thinking and it would work perfectly if you wanted an extra weeks holidays - also depends on where the dude is going.


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    #83
    RHunce
    Registered Users Posts: 1,405 ✭✭✭RHunce


    there was a series of unfortunate events in your family, a selected group of your relatives (your choice) have but make sure it happens every four days, and take like a bereavment holiday! happy days


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    #84
    nicegirl
    Registered Users Posts: 560 ✭✭✭nicegirl


    ninjasurfer1 wrote: »
    If you're "genuinely" unwell, surely you can get a "genuine" medical cert without having to make up a "genuine Excuse"??


    Im not sure if that was directed at me in a negitive way...however just to point out I have fully certified medical certs and have brain scans to prove my condition. Trying to come up with an excuse to take time off work is immoral, and it dosn't help people like me who are genuinely unwell.

    OP, for even thinking to do this, you should be ashamed of yourself. At a time of a recession, you obviously don't appreciate your job....


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    #85
    lynsalot
    Closed Accounts Posts: 407 ✭✭lynsalot


    First of all it's awful that ur getting abuse for booking the hol and asking for a liable excuse. It's your job, your life. It's very risky though and you do run the risk of losing your job esp now with the lack of employment going on.

    I've just been out sick for 2 weeks with the mumps. It's no fun staying in. I have severe cabin fever and feel **** coz i can't do anything. U should try hanging around the IFSC for a while and u might catch up.... only problem is u probably won't enjoy the holiday much and u won't be allowed to fly coz it's highly contagious.....


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    #86
    moretothegirl
    Registered Users Posts: 631 ✭✭✭moretothegirl


    wow wow wow wow lol thanks a mil for all the replies (not so much to those who decided to lecture me though haha)

    i probably should have mentioned beforehand that i'm in college and this is just a part time job and when booking the flights i just said f**k them im not going back to college without a holiday!!

    i never asked them for the time off because i know its pretty much an automatic sacking! they have a rule no hols to be taken durin the summer!


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    #87
    Greenmachine
    Registered Users Posts: 5,063 ✭✭✭Greenmachine


    moretothegirl wrote: »
    wow wow wow wow lol thanks a mil for all the replies (not so much to those who decided to lecture me though haha)

    i probably should have mentioned beforehand that i'm in college and this is just a part time job and when booking the flights i just said f**k them im not going back to college without a holiday!!

    i never asked them for the time off because i know its pretty much an automatic sacking! they have a rule no hols to be taken durin the summer!

    Okay them looks like you will have a month Holiday then. Hope it was worth it.


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    #88
    Hagar
    Closed Accounts Posts: 16,793 ✭✭✭✭Hagar


    I know a guy who took time off for his grandmother's funeral. When he came back HR informed him that he had previously buried two grandmothers and would he care to explain himself. Without batting an eyelash he replied "My grandad remarried".

    May be off topic but It's a good story and Sunday nights are a bit slow. :o


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