What's the worst thing you've done in a taxi?

Abi

Quint wrote: »

At least any taxi drivers that read this thread will be nice

Sure why wouldn't they :pac:

In case you were implying that I wasn't be kind, it wasn't the case. I just found what your friend did was a little dangerous for herself. I probably should have said that to start out with, but I was shocked by her actions. I know everyone is entitled to make a drunken mistake.. but she told the story sober, with pride from what it seems. And if you look at your original post on what she did, you say "Nobody else was in the taxi with her, so I don't know why she told us", I'm not so sure you approved. While defending your friend is admirable, I hope you told her what she did was very dangerous for herself personally. You cannot ignore the fact that this man could have had an STD, and I know I read in recent months about a rapist taxi man. You can never be sure.

/looks around

oh noez I didz a PI in AH :eek:

YULETIRED

I guess the time I was out of my tree and my arab looking driver was arguing about the pros and cons of the war with Isreal, with 4 drunks in his cab, :rolleyes: it got a bit heated when I told him the virgins awaiting the sucide bombers will be disappointed when the guys arrive in paradise, having already blown the bollx out of themselves not my proudest moment , I was punished by allah with a 2 day goldslager hangover.

A thousand apologies

impr0v

Last time in the airport I asked a driver 'How much to town?". "50 euro" He said. "And you think that's reasonable?" I said. "Fookin take it or lee-urv it, pal, bleedin jaysus and shoite, fookin bollix, waaaaa, belch." He then "gozzied" on the ground beside me, seemingly to insult me, or something. "I'll tell you what," I said. "Take your 50 euro, and shove it up your ***". "Fookin cant talk to me loike dat you fookin poshy prick basturd". He then tried to get out of the taxi but tripped and fell in his own gozzy. Then the cops arrested him for being a dublin scumbag with a dublin accent.



(originally and memorably posted by petrochemical)

Volvoboy

Worse things i've seen in my taxi.

Boggers copping of with a Traccceee or shardiiiinnn!!

Fellas doing cocaine 3pm on a sunday!

Fella chasing a call girl i had in the taxi before him??

Wimmen hanging thier head out the car door whilst voming. (while the car is moving)

Girl pissing herself on the backseat and not letting on :mad: only coppped when condensation happend AFTER she left the car!!!!!11!!!

Whole loada MILFY's tried to kidnap me and drag me into O'shays merchant??

Never got the ''Want a blowie for a goey''

Did get a smooch tho!!

Abi

Volvoboy wrote: »

Girl pissing herself on the backseat and not letting on :mad: only coppped when condensation happend AFTER she left the car!!!!!11!!!

That is digusting.. :eek:

Whole loada MILFY's tried to kidnap me and drag me into O'shays merchant??

And you did what about that? :pac:

Never got the ''Want a blowie for a goey''

Male or female, you don't know what your giver / receiver has

chickenhawk

Taxi driver once said the fare and I said here ya go...he puts out his hand for me to put the cash in and I just puke in it. Hop out and walk into the gaf. (didn't pay but met him again and bought him a bottle of whiskey.

Not the worst thing. But when I was a student got a taxi to stop at roadworks and open the boot. I hopped out and loaded as much signs, cones, bricks, fence etc etc into it and then unloaded it at my flat......he was sound!!

Two groups of us were in two taxis and got them to race. It was great but they got done for racing when they arrived at our flat. Unmarked cop car. Poor bastards.

Volvoboy

Abigayle wrote: »

That is digusting.. :eek:

Yep wasnt a loada fun cleanin it up either

Abigayle wrote: »

And you did what about that? :pac:

Polietly turned down thier offer

Abigayle wrote: »

Male or female, you don't know what your giver / receiver has

I'm a dude so there's only 3 holes i'm interested in :pac:

Quality

I have been known to tip the taxi driver.

Usually I am drunk.. Wake up hating myself.

Tipping the moaniest whingiest whiners in Ireland... Oh boo hoo you have to work a 39 hour week like the rest of us to earn your living..

Shut it... ****..

4zn76tysfajdxp

Quality wrote: »

I have been known to tip the taxi driver.

Have you read the whole thread? "Tipping" has a new and completely different meaning in this context.

Quality

Anya Juicy Watchman wrote: »

Have you read the whole thread? "Tipping" has a new and completely different meaning in this context.

Listen I aint no slut.... This lady has a bit of class.


I dont mean tipping the head or tipping the arse, I mean "Keep the change"

Volvoboy

Quality wrote: »

Listen I aint no slut.... This lady has a bit of class.


I dont mean tipping the head or tipping the arse, I mean "Keep the change"

''I know what id like to tip off you love''.

4zn76tysfajdxp

Quality wrote: »

I dont mean tipping the head or tipping the arse, I mean "Keep the change"

(Don't say "Maybe he said the same thing," don't say "Maybe he said the same thing,")

Excellent...maybe he said...thanks?

White_Feather

I have a gay friend and he somehow manages to turn taxi drivers! He has given head about 8 times at this stage to different drivers who drop him home... a way to get out of paying the fare i suppose! :eek:

Oh and he has one ''regular'' guy who makes frequent visits and he is married!!! :eek:

4zn76tysfajdxp

White_Feather wrote: »

I have a gay friend and he somehow manages to turn taxi drivers!

Nope, it's only gay if their balls touch.

chupacabra

fúcked a cat up the arse and then shat in the drivers ear

eoghan104

Abigayle wrote: »

Male or female, you don't know what your giver / receiver has

You seem very over the top scared of STI's. Would you really not give a bloke head without a condom? That wouldn't be great!

I dont have any mad taxi stories but one night my mate and four of the lads found a taxi outside the Burlo with the keys in it and jumped in and drove it to shankill locked singing the "stolen taxi" song he made up. He was sober enough to drop it around the corner from the session they went to and to lock the doors though!

pappyodaniel

chupacabra wrote: »

fúcked a cat up the arse and then shat in the drivers ear

Super Furries fan?

brandon_flowers

OK I didnt do it but..

Driver asked for a deposit before he would take 6 of us to a hostel in Cork at 4 in the morning. Me and another fella gave the c*** a tenner each so he would drive on. When we got to the hostel one of the lads in the very back (8 seater) says "there's another deposit in the back seat for you" The dirty f***er left a dump on the back seat. Hilarious at the time though.

Novella

eoghan104 wrote: »

You seem very over the top scared of STI's. Would you really not give a bloke head without a condom? That wouldn't be great!

How is she over the top?!! Ya never know what anyone has and all she's sayin is she wouldn't give head to a taxi driver!



*I'm sure no offence is meant to taxi drivers, I bet you're all lovely

soundsham

1 jumped out not paying

2 left a mate in town with no money by jumping into it as he was chatting to someone and as he came out told the driver to drive off he was a nutter causing hassle everywhere........central locking was pressed ......i still laugh thinking of him running down pana shouting and roaring

3 went home to my mates gf housewith her for some fondies

WeeBushy

Taximan told me how he shot someone in the stomach during the troubles in the north. What was even scarier than the demented look on his face was that it was outside my house when he told that story. He knows where I live!

Bob Z

Left a tip

blubloblu

3 pages and no yore ma?
I'm shocked.

Mardy Bum

Was heading home after a nite in town. The driver semed fairly sound. Usual conversation weather recession bla bla. Driver starts slaggin off foreign taxi drivers, nothing too racist just the usual, they are taking my money. However it got much worse! Told us a story about boxing a foreign taxi driver in the face for
no particular reason from what I can make out. Then we came to lights and a coloured driver was across from us and the driver started doing monkey actions.:eek: We were getting suitably worried at this point about the mans sanity as the stories got worse. The he told us him and his friends burn foreign taxi drivers cars if they are at their rank...:eek: Needless to say we were glad to get out.


Another time was goin home from a night out in Minneapolis. Had been at a club but left fairly early. Cops were EVERYWHERE I thought because the streets were literally like ice rinks. Before getting into the taxi me friend nearly got knocked down by a massive jeep. Taxi driver tells us to get in quickly we jump in. He tells us that the fella who owned the jeep was the cities crime lord and best to keep out of his way and thats why the cops were everywhere. He then turns up his radio and blares his tunes gangster rap and flies out of the city centre at about 60 or 70 miles in a race with another taxi driver whod pick up a few other friends. Was proper cool more like LA than Minneapolis! We won!

JCDUB

When we were in Melbourne about 8 years ago we were coming home from work in a boozer about 4/5am in a taxi, few pints after work on us, nothin major though.

We were chattin to the taxi driver, in his late 50's, Lebanese or maybe Israeli immigrant so spoke with a funny accent, and he was great craic.We said we were only finished work an hour or so and were gonna have a few smokes and couple of beers for an hour or two when we got home.So in he comes and gets high as a kite, ripping cones and drinking VB's with us until about 7/8am, and off with him then in his taxi, stoned and a few beers in him.

Ah, good times..

Have also puked out the window of a Joer and ran off, this is obligatory when growning up, all taxi drivers know it!

davestar

masturbated, sniffing the drivers hair every 15 seconds

beertons

I fingered a minger. It's the taxi man's fault, he shouldn't have let her in the car!

pappyodaniel

Lenny wrote: »

A good while back I egged the gf on to give me head in the taxi before we got on,
anyway so we jumped in the cab, just a standard one. I sat behind the taxi driver and then she takes out my willy an starts sucking away.
... needless to say it was hard enough to sustain an erection and there wasn't a hope of coming.
but it was a nice novelty..

That's exactly the kind of story i'm lookin for, good boy

RandolphEsq

Got a taxi and on the way home stopped off at a shop for alcohol but it was after the time that alcohol could be sold. However, this was before the time of sealing off the alcohol after the then closing times of 11:30. I hid the booze in my jacket, walked out and got back into the car. As we drove away I told him what had happened

galwayrush

I probably just talked a lot of drunken ****e to the driver.:rolleyes: