What's the worst thing you've done in a taxi?

pappyodaniel

What's the worst thing you've done in a taxi?

I've heard the usual pissing,****ting,puking,fare dodging stories. Any stories of sexy shenanigans or crazy behavior by the customer or the driver for that matter?

Dancor

Licked me burd out

d1975

I remember traveling in a taxi and he was going a little fast at and went over a bump at the triangle in Ranelagh, I threw up (I was sitting at the back seat) and as soon as I knew what I done I told the taxi driver stop here and paid the guy and walked fast lol

markok84

pappyodaniel wrote: »

What's the worst thing you've done in a taxi?

Paid the extortionate bastards.

Maddison

dancor wrote: »

Licked me burd out

Please tell me you didnt.....:eek:

Gran Hermano

I once made the unfortunate mistake of engaging the driver in conversation.

After 10 miles and his constant drone about "bleedin' forreners", deregulation and such like I wish I had just told him to shut up and
drive from the start.

Senna

Was in the back of a taxi with two girls, was going with one of them but as we were kissing i started to feel up the other girl thinking it was the girl i was kissing. The other girl said nothing but the girl i was kissing copped on, started screaming and kicked me out of the taxi.

Sofiztikated

Waved one down, was feeling a bit giggly.

Hopped in one door, scooted over to the other door, hopped out, and asked him how much.

He didn't see the funny side, and drove off in a bit of a huff.

I was amused for weeks though.

The Walsho

Senna wrote: »

Was in the back of a taxi with two girls, was going with one of them but as we were kissing i started to feel up the other girl thinking it was the girl i was kissing. The other girl said nothing but the girl i was kissing copped on, started screaming and kicked me out of the taxi.

This part is a lie isn't it?

Aidric

A fat bird.

Abi

dancor wrote: »

Licked me burd out

Stay classy

Maddison

Abigayle wrote: »

Stay classy

My thoughts exactly;)

Dancor

Maddison wrote: »

My thoughts exactly;)

Get off your high horses, It was a joke :rolleyes:

Senna

The Walsho wrote: »

This part is a lie isn't it?

No didn't know who i "at", drink was my excuse and the other girl was a bit of a migger so that was her excuse.:D

Abi

dancor wrote: »

Get off your high horses, It was bravado :rolleyes:

Ok. Only momentarily though, that post needed fixing.

Maddison

If you had've said I gave my girlfriend oral sex It prob wouldnt have sounded as bad.....burd & lick out made it sound a bit knack:D

briantwin

As the taxi was pulling up outside the house we were going to a session in it was still moving when i got the first wretch of what i knew was going to be reemergence of my curry dinner. So i opened the door and tried to duck and roll onto the grass beside the car. instead i flopped out tumbled while throwing up all over myself. Head to toe in my own puke. The taxi driver looked positively shocked.

4zn76tysfajdxp

Maddison wrote: »

If you had've said I gave my girlfriend oral sex It prob wouldnt have sounded as bad....

Or if it was in a limo.

RVN10

Asked was he busy ??? But it prob sounded something along the lines of hahjsdskldnsklhcskoj you get the jist ha

Hamiltonion

Argued with a friends directions back to hers while calling left at every corner and then upon protest 'shut up i know my way round the *waits for road sign* .....N11!!! ':D

Mimikyu

This post has been deleted.

Degsy

I was in the back drinking abottle of wine when the driver jammed on..nearly sent the bottle through the b ack of my neck.

Abi

Degsy wrote: »

I was in the back drinking abottle of wine when the driver jammed on..nearly sent the bottle through the b ack of my neck.

Did you like it?

sub-x

dancor wrote: »

Licked me burd out

Licked out Dancors bird

Dancor

Maddison wrote: »

If you had've said I gave my girlfriend oral sex It prob wouldnt have sounded as bad.....burd & lick out made it sound a bit knack:D

That was the point :P

BTW the real worst thing I did in a taxi was eat birthday cake while drunk, He gave me a bolloking for it.

phasers

I don't do bad things is taxis, the only time was when I fell asleep and the bastard just kept driving around in circles for an hour with the meter running!

He brought me home and I paid him a tenner, which is what it should have been, and told him if he didn't like it he could take it up with my twelve rottweilers

tony 2 tone

Sobered up, realised I didn't have a clue who the young one I was with was. Hopped out when the taxi stopped at lights and legged it down the road.

Lenny

A good while back I egged the gf on to give me head in the taxi before we got on,
anyway so we jumped in the cab, just a standard one. I sat behind the taxi driver and then she takes out my willy an starts sucking away.
To be quite honest it was quite uncomfortable, the driver knew exzactly what was going on and kept looking me in the eye through his rear view mirror and that was such a put off hah, and it just wasn't right looking out the window... needless to say it was hard enough to sustain an erection and there wasn't a hope of coming.
but it was a nice novelty..

Seth Brundle

Maddison wrote: »

If you had've said I gave my girlfriend oral sex It prob wouldnt have sounded as bad.....burd & lick out made it sound a bit knack:D

...and giving your girlfriend oral sex in the back of a taxi is classy?

sub-x wrote: »

Licked out Dancors bird

So what - loads of people have!

Vinta81

I had no money left after a night out once! I thought I hada €10 note left in my purse, I didn't...so had to explain that once we stopped and I fumbled around my bag for ages "pretending it was there". My driver was so nice, actually left me off and I actually popped into the cab office the next day to pay up lol, they were quite shocked. Couldn't of just skived off that though!

Aidric

Lenny wrote: »

A good while back I egged the gf on to give me head in the taxi before we got on,
anyway so we jumped in the cab, just a standard one. I sat behind the taxi driver and then she takes out my willy an starts sucking away.
To be quite honest it was quite uncomfortable, the driver knew exzactly what was going on and kept looking me in the eye through his rear view mirror and that was such a put off hah, and it just wasn't right looking out the window... needless to say it was hard enough to sustain an erection and there wasn't a hope of coming.
but it was a nice novelty..

Ya, had the same experience but it was in one of those people carriers rather than a standard car, bit of scope and all that. Anyways the prick of the taxi driver talked the whole ten minutes of the trip so concentration was affected. I didn't manage to cum but got out of the taxi with a massive stalk and paid the driver his 10 quid, quickly went inside and smashed her on the stairs.

RHunce

i was in NYC roared at the top of my irish voice for a taxi, got several looks and at last a taxi, when i went to the drivers window i said thanks i've always wanted to do that

the curses that came out of his mouth, while in pakistani, one must realise a bullet is a bullet in any language

Overflow

Got a taxi with my mate from the taxi rank at bray dart station, he started driving and i promptly told him to stop 20 meters away at the henry and rose chipper, he was nay impressed, we got out, went into the chipper and i ordered a rasher, the lady in the chipper asked, a rasher with what, i said just a rasher love, she was nay impressed either, but i got my rasher in a bag to the befuddlement (yes its a real word) of the lady behind the counter.

Loopy

I puked in my handbag, was not pleasant the next day when I forgot about it and starting brushing my hair with my hairbrush that was covered in vomit

Quint

My mate was drunk and decided to give a taxi driver a blowjob outside her house. After she paid the full fare. She was on her own, no idea why she decided to tell us all the next day

Gummy Panda

Loopy wrote: »

I puked in my handbag, was not pleasant the next day when I forgot about it and starting brushing my hair with my hairbrush that was covered in vomit

That explains a lot..


/opens window

Armin_Tamzarian

Not the worst thing I've done in a taxi but definitely the weirdest experience in a taxi.

Was with a few mates one Christmas, there was snow all over the ground.
We'd been trying for ages to flag down a taxi when eventually some bloke in an Almera pulled up and said, "lookin for a taxi bud?".
Great we thought, a hackney will do rightly and we'll save a few quid too.

Now I remember thinking that the bloke looked barely old enough to drive but in my drunken, frozen state I wasn't overly concerned.

About halfway through the trip he missed our left turn off the dual-carriageway.
I had just began to point this out to him as we approached the next set of lights.
"No worries bud", says yer man as he lifts the handbrake at the lights and performed a rather impressive 180-degree drift manouvere in the snow.
Successfully getting us going back down the dual-carriageway to our turn off.
It was around then that I noticed that the ignition wires were all hanging down beneath the steering wheel.
I was quite shocked, this guy obviously wasn't afraid of losing his taxi licence.
You can't be driving a taxi round in a state like that, not to mention the fact that the small window at the back was broken.

In fairness though he got us to our destination and it only cost us a tenner.
It was no wonder he undercharged us though, the clown didn't even have a meter in the car.

ChocolateSauce

I'm fairly tame compared to some of those stories. The oddest must have been this time I was really, really, really high on LSD, got a taxi, and engaged the man in conversation. I don't have a clue what I said, or even why I was in the taxi.

sub-x

kbannon wrote: »

...and giving your girlfriend oral sex in the back of a taxi is classy?

So what - loads of people have!

I wasn't boasting, was just making it official;)

Overflow

ChocolateSauce wrote: »

I'm fairly tame compared to some of those stories. The oddest must have been this time I was really, really, really high on LSD, got a taxi, and engaged the man in conversation. I don't have a clue what I said, or even why I was in the taxi.

I don't think taking LSD is tame by any standards , i cant imagine doing it in a taxi, it would probably feel like something out of fear and loathing in las vegas i'm guessing!

ajax147

asked what the fare was

ajax147

he asked the worst thing not the best woman smasher

F1ngers

Quint wrote: »

My mate was drunk and decided to give a taxi driver a blowjob outside her house. After she paid the full fare. She was on her own, no idea why she decided to tell us all the next day

Your mate...;)

charmer

Not exactly in the taxi but...

Woke up after a hard night's drinking with a note in the door from the taxi man, apparently I owed him 40 quid even though the fare from the club would have been a tenner.

So I rang him to come collect it. It was when I opened the door the flashbacks arrived...yup, I kissed a taxi man.

Minutes later I realised I had also puked in my wallet.

BlueButterBean

Was coming home from a night out with me friend once and we where both very "drunk"..finally get into our estate and next minute me friends whips out a bottle of ms.massage body oil stuff and starts massaging the taxi driver!!!..and yes one thing led to another right infront of me!!

FunkSoulSista

I flagged one down in America on a dare and asked the taxi man "Do you know the way to San Jose" in full song....lets just say he didn't....

mardybumbum

I was getting a taxi home from templebar one night.
Taxi driver seemed normal enough at the start. Just made some terrible jokes and thought he was being funny. Then he started making some really scary laughing sound and kept repeating the phrase " heeeeeres johhny ".
Then when he got to harcourt he pulled out a ****in harmonica and started jamming along to whatever ****e was on the radio with one hand on the steering wheel.
Then just as I passed Rody Bolands he asked me did I want to see his chest hair. I didnt want to offend the man as I was afraid of him, so I said ok.
He unbuttoned his shirt and showed me his chest hair which he had shaved the shape of the cross into.
The girlfriend was mortified with him.

Ill never forget that guy. Absolutely crazy.

Supermanscat

Got a taxi in Galway, the driver was African, very very dark skin colour.

He asked me was i going out to GMIT because if i was he wouldn't bring me.

Completely forgetting his skin colour and with a few pints on me i replied 'Im no fcukin monkey'

Cue awkwardness!

rainbow kirby

Opened the door to puke while stopped at traffic lights. I really shouldn't ever be let near rum...

dylano_k

Hopped into a taxi at the rank on the quays after waitin 15mins and said to my mate..you payin for this..he said ha no, so we asked the 2 girls..are you's payin for this...they also said no. So he brought us around to pearse st station and told us to get out haha dont think he had a sense of humor !!!

Also a mate of mine after a party got a taxi with a foreign driver and told him "i hope this cars NCT'd those tires dont feel right, the driver txt him the next morning sayin he got the car checked and its fine good. He must have scared the guy to make him do that haha He cant remember any of this his gf had to tell him...least thats one more taxi on the road thats safe !!!:D

Slunk

Walking home one night me and the gf met a few random people and were having a chat walking along the street. Next thing I know she was afetr pulling a taxi. We get in and she says, have ye got a light, ive no lighter and i presume you have some sort or thing to light my smoke in your car. He gave us a light and we got out and continued talking to the randoms we just met. Taxi man driving slowly beside us asking if we are serious. We said yeah and he laughed and drove off.