Approaching girl in pub/club

quickquestion

Hi,

Can anyone give me a few pointers on what to say?

I'm not one for cheesy chat-up lines but don't have a clue what to say other than very simple small-talk. And it's very hard to crack a joke with someone you don't even know.

What do most people do? Genuine pointers would be appreciated! Thanks!

Poccington

This isn't gonna end well...

Captain-America

This guy is going to get slaughtered.

cson

Mystery-icise her

AlmightyCushion

Does this smell like chloroform to you?

poisonated

ah come on give him a break.Its probably in the wrong forum though

Good God look at that over there! (puts rohypnol into drink)

scudster

Make eye contact, smile and have a little staring competition. That will let ya know if he/she has some interest without the risk of getting your self blown out of the water. If he/she is interested he/she might even approach you!

Try "I committed a sexual assault tonight, will you be my alibi? "

galwayrush

Not falling on them or puking all over them is a good start.;)

Captain-America

"You were much hotter when I was over there."

N_Raid

"Did it hurt when you fell from heaven?
Cos it looks like you landed on your face!"

Girls love a sense of humour

galwayrush

I got the all clear, i am now disease free.

Mark200

Is that a mirror in your pocket? Because I can see myself in your pants.

Captain-America

Look, I completely forgot my wallet there, will you buy me a pint? You can come back to my place later and I'll pay you back.

speedboatchase

Read The Game by Neill Strauss. Seriously


Also tell her she looks good at sex

kiffer

Oy. You'll do.

galwayrush

I think the OP has left.:D

quickquestion

No I haven't left. Maybe it's in the wrong forum though. No worries

Professey Chin

Say nothing. Make eye contact a couple of times and smile. If she smiles back then calmly approach her. Then once youre in range to greet her and begin a conversation, whack the bitch with a stick

galwayrush

quickquestion wrote: »

No I haven't left. Maybe it's in the wrong forum though. No worries

Don't take AH replies seriously.;)

Professey Chin

galwayrush wrote: »

Don't take AH replies seriously.;)

Shut uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuup

hunter164

"Jzuz I've a hard on jsut looking at ya, ja wna suck me dick?"

Mr Maroon

Just say "you'll do"

AckwelFoley

Ah the million dollar question...

Best approach is to be original if possible to try to woo her affections - if that fails at least try to be original in offending her.

Try something like -

"oh hi! hello hows things?"

Fine thanks

"Ive a problem, ive got a pet im trying to find a home for and you look like a person that it would suit"

Eh? What sort of animal??!

"An Elephant"
**Pull down your zipper pull out your cock and empty your trouser pockets inside out**

speedboatchase

OP, buy that book in Easons tomorrow and you'll see the difference, trust me

tony1kenobi

"Will you hold my pint while I go for a sh1t?"

It nearly always works.

Linku

That dress is very becoming on you. Of course, if I were on you, I'd be coming too.

speedboatchase

snyper wrote: »

Ah the million dollar question...

Best approach is to be original if possible to try to woo her affections - if that fails at least try to be original in offending her.

Try something like -

"oh hi! hello hows things?"

Fine thanks

"Ive a problem, ive got a pet im trying to find a home for and you look like a person that it would suit"

Eh? What sort of animal??!

"An Elephant"
**Pull down your zipper pull out your cock and empty your trouser pockets inside out**

Just broke my balls laughing to that

Local-womanizer

"Geez,fair play,ya dont sweat much for a fat doll"

All them fatties are desperate so they will love this.

AckwelFoley

do you like to dance?

yeah why?

Great! - ok well go over there and dance so i can talk to your friend

missingtime

Just heard on good one on the new episode of Fringe
Spoilered for the fans

And I thought I was the best looking person in here

Whosbetter?

Make eye contact with her, approach, & say in a calm & authorative voice.
'Get your coat on, you've pulled';)

Tinchy

eye contact but dont stare! you'll know by the way she reacts if shes interested or not.

Local-womanizer

"Get your coat,I have a knife"

Zigmund

"Hi, my name's Rape. Remember it now, you'll be screaming it later."

tony1kenobi

Whosbetter? wrote: »

Make eye contact with her, approach, & say in a calm & authorative voice.
'Get your coat on, you've pulled';)

Or....."give me your clothes,your boots and your motorcycle"

Whosbetter?

'How would ye like to buried with my people' is a good 'un too!:D:D:D

AckwelFoley

Whosbetter? wrote: »

'How would ye like to buried with my people' is a good 'un too!:D:D:D

That probably depends on if you'r giving her the vibes that it will happen within the next 12 - 18 hours or in 50 years time.

I find if you do it with a smile - the latter is the impression she will get

Whosbetter?

"Are ya dancin'? I've Wheels!!!!":D

Said to Mrs Whosbetter? many moons ago.

Fizman

If I flip a coin, what are the chances of me getting head?

/followed by a loud "giggidy giggidy goo".

OpenYourEyes

Fizman wrote: »

If I flip a coin, what are the chances of me getting head?

/followed by a loud "giggidy giggidy goo".

Ive heard pretty much everything here before, but this one made me laugh out loud!

yerayeah

Just go up to her go "sooooo, your place or mine?"

Smellyirishman

Stop stealing jokes for thanks!

That is all.

chosen1

ask her if she would like to dance.
If the answer is no or she starts getting ratty with you tell her she didnt hear you correctly. It was meant to be
"you look fat in those pants!"

Abi

Say "I love dancing. wanna dance with me?" <insert cheesey smile>



I loves tah dance. would work for me anywho .>.>

TheZohanS

Ok for once in my life I'm gonna be serious...

"Hi there, you're looking well", "I noticed you checking me out"-SMILE

"I'm out with friends tonight and have to get back to them, but how about we swap numbers and I'll give you a shout for a coffee or a drink?"


Take her number and walk away.:)

Ring her the next day or so and ask her out.

WIN.

naasface

Dont mind the other replies other person. None were funny. Just nerds trying to be witty. Eh fail..


Anyway if you're inside the club i'd give a bit of eye contact in her direction. Once, to her eyes. Anymore its creepy (well imo). Approach her and ask her does she want a drink. Then just start askin her bout herself. 'So are u from Dublin/Laois/Donegal(your current location) yourself?'...thats a good starter. Ask her if she's in college or working or somethin..go into spiel how college was great craic for you or you could never hack it. Insert funny story. Just go with the flow really!!!
If you're in the smoking area. Ask does she have a light..start convo as above
Just be relaxed dont make it obvious you're trying to get in her pants. At end of night if you're getting on be like hey, you're cool can i have your number. Play it cool is the key.
From a girl

AckwelFoley

TheZohan wrote: »

Ok for once in my life I'm gonna be serious...

"Hi there, you're looking well", "I noticed you checking me out"-SMILE

"I'm out with friends tonight and have to get back to them, but how about we swap numbers and I'll give you a shout for a coffee or a drink?"


Take her number and walk away.:)

Ring her the next day or so and ask her out.

WIN.

Ask her out there and then and save yourself the price of the call.

Aodan83

naasface wrote: »

From a girl

Im callin shenanigans. There are no girls on the internet.

Shacklebolt

snyper wrote: »

Ask her out there and then and save yourself the price of the call.

Cheap-skate. I suppose this is what she'll get come Valentines day...

http://www.guy-sports.com/fun_pictures/tesco_valentines_card_sm.jpg