How often do you fart?

Archeron

I know its an after hours question, but seriously, how often do you fart?

Not counting ones I do in my sleep (obviously) I would probably fart about 4 / 5 times a day. Usually quite quiet, but itif feels like there is power there, I'd retire to a private place so as not to annoy anyone. (unless I'm at mass)

Another guy I know farts roughly about every six minutes, guaranteed. These are serious air pockets, and they are consistent and plenty in number. I find it rather odd that someone can expel that much gas. Where does it come from?

So, what is normal, how often do you fart?

Banrion

LOL.
Sorry I cant help. Im a girl.

Abi

In this current economic climate, I fill celebration balloons in Hallmark. I used to manage a bank.

Snowie

do you smell your own farts ?

if your in bed, would you lift up the cover's and have a deep smell of your fart?

HarryPalmer

Depends on the booze and food intake, obviously. But I would average as often and as loudly as possible.

ladyella

Banrion wrote: »

LOL.
Sorry I cant help. Im a girl.

And obviously, girls dont fart

Berty

The smell of a womans fart is quite possibly the most offensive smell in the world.

Saibh

Banrion wrote: »

LOL.
Sorry I cant help. Im a girl.

You should have said I'm a lady, so I don't fart

Snowie

womens farts are the worst!!!

Kazu

the silent ones are deadly :D


pull my finger :D

galwayrush

I am getting better at it with age. Once managed to fart the length of my driveway ( 150 ft) while walking.Should have timed it. Most impressive and satisfying it was too.:cool:

Ginny

Ladies wind explosions smell of roses and lavander...

stepbar

I blew up a house in Blackrock today with my farts.

HarryPalmer

Berty wrote: »

The smell of a womans fart is quite possibly the most offensive smell in the world.

Indeed, which is why it is so much fun to introudce them to a dutch oven.

Banrion

Berty wrote: »

The smell of a womans fart is quite possibly the most offensive smell in the world.

Thats not very nice Berty.
I dont even like the word tbh.
I hope I win The late late show money......:eek:

Gummy Panda

Snow-Monkey wrote: »

womens farts are the worst!!!

I agree!

The truth behind women's farts

seanybiker

I have farted twice typing this sentence.

Saibh

Banrion wrote: »

Thats not very nice Berty.
I dont even like the word tbh.
I hope I win The late late show money......:eek:

If you don't like that word, wait till you read through some of the threads in AH...

HarryPalmer

seanybiker wrote: »

I have farted twice typing this sentence.

I almost shat myself reading your post. Smells good around here.

Captain Slow IRL

Depends on diet - can be only 1 or 2 or if I'm really lucky, it'll be consistently loud and full bodied all day.

Women's farts make baby Jesus cry:(

Serafina27

Berty wrote: »

The smell of a womans fart is quite possibly the most offensive smell in the world.

Scariest thing to have to happen in a packed pub: walk past the big guy with the guinness. No woman can produce that smell...........

6th

Banrion wrote: »

LOL.
Sorry I cant help. Im a girl.

Don't be silly. There a re no girls on the internet.

Anyway I'd say I throw out a good dozen during a waking day.

Abi

I have never, nor will I ever, fart around any man or woman.

Farts are preludes to no.2's. If you feel bubbly, make your way to the powder room.

Theres nothing sexy about a woman that lifts her leg and lets go- and if its a smelly one, get yo nasty self to a zoo.

HarryPalmer

Abigayle wrote: »

...make your way to the powder room.

WTF is a powder room? Are you American, or do you mean the crapper?

Banrion

The only time I ever smell other peoples (who are not members of my immediate family) is when Im in a pub.
I hate walking past a group of people and getting a bad smell and they all skulking guiltily behind their pints.

Captain Slow IRL

Abigayle wrote: »

Theres nothing sexy about a woman that lifts her leg and lets go

It's not supposed to be sexy - but it is funny:D

Archeron

galwayrush wrote: »

I am getting better at it with age. Once managed to fart the length of my driveway ( 150 ft) while walking.Should have timed it. Most impressive and satisfying it was too.:cool:

LOL, I had one of them recently, and I did time it. 78 seconds of solid parp!!

Snowie

no women can fart when they want to

SoupyNorman

Abigayle wrote: »

I have never, nor will I ever, fart around any man or woman.

Farts are preludes to no.2's. If you feel bubbly, make your way to the powder room.

Man translation....

"Get out of the way, I've a hefty sod of turf ready to let fly"



I fart alot, and whats more I do it with pride and relief.

Banrion

Snow-Monkey wrote: »

no women can fart when they want to

Why? Can you?

Snowie

Captain Slow IRL wrote: »

It's not supposed to be sexy - but it is funny:D

not as funny as a front bottem fart :D:D:D