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How often do you fart?

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  • 14-03-2009 12:10am
    #1
    Archeron
    Registered Users Posts: 6,164 ✭✭✭


    I know its an after hours question, but seriously, how often do you fart?

    Not counting ones I do in my sleep (obviously) I would probably fart about 4 / 5 times a day. Usually quite quiet, but itif feels like there is power there, I'd retire to a private place so as not to annoy anyone. (unless I'm at mass)

    Another guy I know farts roughly about every six minutes, guaranteed. These are serious air pockets, and they are consistent and plenty in number. I find it rather odd that someone can expel that much gas. Where does it come from?

    So, what is normal, how often do you fart?
    Tagged:


«134

Comments

  • Options
    #2
    Banrion
    Closed Accounts Posts: 95 ✭✭Banrion


    LOL.
    Sorry I cant help. Im a girl.


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    #3
    Abi
    Closed Accounts Posts: 22,058 ✭✭✭✭Abi


    In this current economic climate, I fill celebration balloons in Hallmark. I used to manage a bank.


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    #4
    Snowie
    Closed Accounts Posts: 22,048 ✭✭✭✭Snowie


    do you smell your own farts ?

    if your in bed, would you lift up the cover's and have a deep smell of your fart?


  • Options
    #5
    HarryPalmer
    Closed Accounts Posts: 243 ✭✭HarryPalmer


    Depends on the booze and food intake, obviously. But I would average as often and as loudly as possible.


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    #6
    ladyella
    Registered Users Posts: 208 ✭✭ladyella


    Banrion wrote: »
    LOL.
    Sorry I cant help. Im a girl.

    And obviously, girls dont fart :o


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  • Options
    #7
    Berty
    Registered Users Posts: 26,149 ✭✭✭✭Berty


    The smell of a womans fart is quite possibly the most offensive smell in the world.


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    #8
    Saibh
    Closed Accounts Posts: 10,431 ✭✭✭✭Saibh


    Banrion wrote: »
    LOL.
    Sorry I cant help. Im a girl.

    You should have said I'm a lady, so I don't fart ;)


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    #9
    Snowie
    Closed Accounts Posts: 22,048 ✭✭✭✭Snowie


    womens farts are the worst!!!


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    #10
    Kazu
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,309 ✭✭✭Kazu


    the silent ones are deadly :D:D


    pull my finger :D:D


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    #11
    galwayrush
    Registered Users Posts: 12,815 ✭✭✭✭galwayrush


    I am getting better at it with age. Once managed to fart the length of my driveway ( 150 ft) while walking.Should have timed it. Most impressive and satisfying it was too.:cool:


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  • Options
    #12
    Ginny
    Hosted Moderators Posts: 13,425 ✭✭✭✭Ginny


    Ladies wind explosions smell of roses and lavander...


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    #13
    stepbar
    Closed Accounts Posts: 6,123 ✭✭✭stepbar


    I blew up a house in Blackrock today with my farts.


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    #14
    HarryPalmer
    Closed Accounts Posts: 243 ✭✭HarryPalmer


    Berty wrote: »
    The smell of a womans fart is quite possibly the most offensive smell in the world.

    Indeed, which is why it is so much fun to introudce them to a dutch oven.


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    #15
    Banrion
    Closed Accounts Posts: 95 ✭✭Banrion


    Berty wrote: »
    The smell of a womans fart is quite possibly the most offensive smell in the world.

    Thats not very nice Berty.
    I dont even like the word tbh.
    I hope I win The late late show money......:eek:


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    #16
    Gummy Panda
    Closed Accounts Posts: 20,920 ✭✭✭✭Gummy Panda


    Snow-Monkey wrote: »
    womens farts are the worst!!!

    I agree!

    The truth behind women's farts


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    #17
    seanybiker
    Closed Accounts Posts: 10,898 ✭✭✭✭seanybiker


    I have farted twice typing this sentence.


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    #18
    Saibh
    Closed Accounts Posts: 10,431 ✭✭✭✭Saibh


    Banrion wrote: »
    Thats not very nice Berty.
    I dont even like the word tbh.
    I hope I win The late late show money......:eek:

    If you don't like that word, wait till you read through some of the threads in AH...


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    #19
    HarryPalmer
    Closed Accounts Posts: 243 ✭✭HarryPalmer


    seanybiker wrote: »
    I have farted twice typing this sentence.

    I almost shat myself reading your post. Smells good around here.


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    #20
    Captain Slow IRL
    Registered Users Posts: 3,651 ✭✭✭Captain Slow IRL


    Depends on diet - can be only 1 or 2 or if I'm really lucky, it'll be consistently loud and full bodied all day.

    Women's farts make baby Jesus cry:(


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    #21
    Serafina27
    Closed Accounts Posts: 36 ✭Serafina27


    Berty wrote: »
    The smell of a womans fart is quite possibly the most offensive smell in the world.
    Scariest thing to have to happen in a packed pub: walk past the big guy with the guinness. No woman can produce that smell...........


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    #22
    6th
    Registered Users Posts: 17,247 ✭✭✭✭6th


    Banrion wrote: »
    LOL.
    Sorry I cant help. Im a girl.

    Don't be silly. There a re no girls on the internet.

    Anyway I'd say I throw out a good dozen during a waking day.


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    #23
    Abi
    Closed Accounts Posts: 22,058 ✭✭✭✭Abi


    I have never, nor will I ever, fart around any man or woman.

    Farts are preludes to no.2's. If you feel bubbly, make your way to the powder room.

    Theres nothing sexy about a woman that lifts her leg and lets go- and if its a smelly one, get yo nasty self to a zoo.


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    #24
    HarryPalmer
    Closed Accounts Posts: 243 ✭✭HarryPalmer


    Abigayle wrote: »
    ...make your way to the powder room.

    WTF is a powder room? Are you American, or do you mean the crapper? :)


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    #25
    Banrion
    Closed Accounts Posts: 95 ✭✭Banrion


    The only time I ever smell other peoples (who are not members of my immediate family) is when Im in a pub.
    I hate walking past a group of people and getting a bad smell and they all skulking guiltily behind their pints.


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    #26
    Captain Slow IRL
    Registered Users Posts: 3,651 ✭✭✭Captain Slow IRL


    Abigayle wrote: »
    Theres nothing sexy about a woman that lifts her leg and lets go

    It's not supposed to be sexy - but it is funny:D


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    #27
    Archeron
    Registered Users Posts: 6,164 ✭✭✭Archeron


    galwayrush wrote: »
    I am getting better at it with age. Once managed to fart the length of my driveway ( 150 ft) while walking.Should have timed it. Most impressive and satisfying it was too.:cool:

    LOL, I had one of them recently, and I did time it. 78 seconds of solid parp!!


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    #28
    Snowie
    Closed Accounts Posts: 22,048 ✭✭✭✭Snowie


    no women can fart when they want to


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    #29
    SoupyNorman
    Registered Users Posts: 4,257 ✭✭✭SoupyNorman


    Abigayle wrote: »
    I have never, nor will I ever, fart around any man or woman.

    Farts are preludes to no.2's. If you feel bubbly, make your way to the powder room.


    Man translation....

    "Get out of the way, I've a hefty sod of turf ready to let fly"



    I fart alot, and whats more I do it with pride and relief.


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    #30
    Banrion
    Closed Accounts Posts: 95 ✭✭Banrion


    Snow-Monkey wrote: »
    no women can fart when they want to

    Why? Can you?


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    #31
    Snowie
    Closed Accounts Posts: 22,048 ✭✭✭✭Snowie


    Captain Slow IRL wrote: »
    It's not supposed to be sexy - but it is funny:D


    not as funny as a front bottem fart :D:D:D:D


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