Girlfriends contraceptive issues

prinz

Terodil wrote: »

On a slightly different (and admittedly non-PI) note, I wonder why the pill is such a big deal in Ireland. By contrast, in Germany, 54% of all couples use the pill, only 19% condoms...

While I bow to your superior knowledge of all things German-related, I'd like to say that my gf is German, and has never, neither has she any intention of ever taking the pill. I believe the Germans to be much better informed and have a better understanding of these things than the Irish do in general. That said I read up, talked about it and decided against it, her wish and mine, due to the levels of danger associated with the Pill ( of which my gf had first-hand experience with a friend of hers suffering serious clotting ).After learning what I did I could not recommend the Pill to anyone unless they are 100% knowledgeable about the possible side effects and consequences. Like I said earlier, you are far more likely to suffer a reaction to the pill than to get pregnant without it.

Nevyn

The oral contraceptive pill is simply not suited for ever woman and a woman's choice
when it comes to her body and contraceptive methods have to be respected.

LegacyUser

prinz wrote: »

While I bow to your superior knowledge of all things German-related, I'd like to say that my gf is German, and has never, neither has she any intention of ever taking the pill. I believe the Germans to be much better informed and have a better understanding of these things than the Irish do in general. That said I read up, talked about it and decided against it, her wish and mine, due to the levels of danger associated with the Pill ( of which my gf had first-hand experience with a friend of hers suffering serious clotting ).After learning what I did I could not recommend the Pill to anyone unless they are 100% knowledgeable about the possible side effects and consequences. Like I said earlier, you are far more likely to suffer a reaction to the pill than to get pregnant without it.

Yeah because we sill Irish people haven't a clue, we'd pop any old pill a doctor prescribed to us. The side effects of the pill are few and far between and differ between different brands and types.

It is widely accepted among medical proffessionals as one of the safest, most effective types of contraception among young women.

If you do enough digging, or "informing" yourself on any medication, from calpol to diazapan you will find negative side effects.

OP, you and gf should take a visit to a family planning clinic where you can get educated advice from a professional, who will be happy to talk to you about your options.

prinz

Unregistered wrote: »

Yeah because we sill Irish people haven't a clue, we'd pop any old pill a doctor prescribed to us. The side effects of the pill are few and far between...

Did you read what I said? Or are you just being argumentative? Most Europeans are a lot better informed on all things medical than Irish people in general, verging on hyperchondria, ever seen a European's drug cabinet? It's like a small chemist. Having lived in a number of European countries I have learned these things.Please read what I say and digest it before jumping on a high-horse. I think anyone who has experience of living abroad will agree with me.

Saying the side effects are few and far between proves how little you know. Thanks for proving my point.

prinz

unreg-guy wrote: »

I want my girlfriend to go on a contraceptive, i do not feel condoms alone are safe enough. She doesnt want to,

unreg-guy wrote: »

I know about the other options but the pill is probably the best for us.

Don't you mean best for you?

shellyboo

prinz wrote: »

Don't you mean best for you?

I think he means best for us. He's already wearing condoms, there's nothing more he personally can do to prevent pregnancy. I think he's just being responsible, wanting to minimise the risk as much as possible - the pill is the obvious choice. It's not like he'll be giving up the condoms when she goes on the pill, he wants them to use both... or at least, that's how it reads to me.

OP, if your gf has a valid reason for not wanting to go on the pill, there's not much you can do. Ask her about other barrier methods, as other posters have said. The diaphragm combined with condoms is very effective, so my own doctor tells me.

However, if she's opposed to using any sort of contraception herself, you need to question if you're still going to sleep with her. I wouldn't be with a guy who refused to use condoms, whether I was on the pill or not. I don't see how this is any different.

prinz

shellyboo wrote: »

I think he means best for us. He's already wearing condoms, there's nothing more he personally can do to prevent pregnancy. I think he's just being responsible, wanting to minimise the risk as much as possible - the pill is the obvious choice. It's not like he'll be giving up the condoms when she goes on the pill, he wants them to use both... or at least, that's how it reads to me.

OP, if your gf has a valid reason for not wanting to go on the pill, there's not much you can do. Ask her about other barrier methods, as other posters have said. The diaphragm combined with condoms is very effective, so my own doctor tells me.

However, if she's opposed to using any sort of contraception herself, you need to question if you're still going to sleep with her. I wouldn't be with a guy who refused to use condoms, whether I was on the pill or not. I don't see how this is any different.

He is being responsible fair play and all that. But at then end of the day if she doesn't want to she doesn't want to. He can't decide for both of them, other than to put up or leave her. If the sex is that important to him he should leave the girl alone and not try to put pressure on her to do something she's obviously not comfortable doing. I'm sorry I didn't realise we were back in the day when the man made the decisions for his OH I don't see her as being any less responsible. Hey we agree, it was just the way he phrased it that seemed odd.

prinz

shellyboo wrote: »

I think he means best for us. He's already wearing condoms, there's nothing more he personally can do to prevent pregnancy.

I suppose abstinence is out of the question?

LegacyUser

prinz wrote: »

Did you read what I said? Or are you just being argumentative? Most Europeans are a lot better informed on all things medical than Irish people in general, verging on hyperchondria, ever seen a European's drug cabinet? It's like a small chemist. Having lived in a number of European countries I have learned these things.Please read what I say and digest it before jumping on a high-horse. I think anyone who has experience of living abroad will agree with me.

Saying the side effects are few and far between proves how little you know. Thanks for proving my point.

Someone deigning to disagree with you is not being argumentative Prinz. I'd love to know where you have gotten these ideas from about Irish people v European. A large amount of prescription only drugs are sold over the counter in European Countries therefore they would naturally have a lot of them in there medicine cabinet, this does in no way indicate that they are more knowledgable on the subject.

Darling I lived in Amsterdam for 2 years, I've lived in AUstralia for 1 and most recently Barcelona for another 2 years.

I am also a pharmacist just in case you think I am not informed enough on the matter.

Now please stop going off topic and making this about you, the OP has asked for advice and is entitled to receive it from everyone,not just you.

shellyboo

prinz wrote: »

I suppose abstinence is out of the question?

I said that at the end there... if she won't budge, he has to reconsider sleeping with her

prinz wrote: »

I'm sorry I didn't realise we were back in the day when the man made the decisions for his OH I don't see her as being any less responsible. Hey we agree, it was just the way he phrased it that seemed odd.

But she IS less responsible. Let's put it the other way around - I'm on the pill, I don't feel that's safe enough, my bf refuses to wear condoms in order to decrease the risk for whatever reason... to embarrased to buy them, doesn't like wearing them, no sensation, blah.

That wouldn't be ok, would it?! That's the woman making the decision for a man (we have to use condoms), and we're ok with her doing that - why not the other way around?

The OP is just asking for a bit more protection. And while there ARE valid reasons for not wanting to go on the pill, side effects etc, she doesn't seem to be seriously considering them, she's just waving them off. Which is really unfair on the OP.

LegacyUser

unreg-guy wrote: »

I know about the other options but the pill is probably the best for us. I'm not forcing her into anything, but she has said she would go to the doctor and ee what's best for her but she still hasn't bothered to go, just makes up excuses and when I ask she says she will do it soon. I dunno if she is afraid of going or what

Have you asked her that? You should be offering to go with her OP, it takes two to tango...

prinz

Unregistered wrote: »

Someone deigning to disagree with you is not being argumentative Prinz. I'd love to know where you have gotten these ideas from about Irish people v European. A large amount of prescription only drugs are sold over the counter in European Countries therefore they would naturally have a lot of them in there medicine cabinet, this does in no way indicate that they are more knowledgable on the subject.

Darling I lived in Amsterdam for 2 years, I've lived in AUstralia for 1 and most recently Barcelona for another 2 years.

I am also a pharmacist just in case you think I am not informed enough on the matter.

Now please stop going off topic and making this about you, the OP has asked for advice and is entitled to receive it from everyone,not just you.

YOU made it about me. Personal experience poster. And accusing me of a sleight on Irish people because I said in general in my experience.... that's not disagreeing, that's being argumentative. I gave advice. I am not stopping anyone else from giving advice.......

And please don't ever refer to me as "Darling" ever again.

Nevyn

prinz banned for one week for off topic and unhelful posting.