Thanks, but no thanks

St Bill

Ok, I was out last Saturday having a great night, chatting to anyone passing. Unfortunately, two guys (was talking to them at different times) thought I was into them because I was talking to them, and eventually got pi*sed off because I wouldn't give them my phone number. Cue a deathstare from one, and insults from the other which, needless to say, put a bit of a dampener on the night
I don't want to be rude (as I don't want to add fuel to the 'Irish women are b*tches' inferno!). So what do you do when the whole 'Can I have your number?' bit comes up? Any nice one-liners to deflect bad feeling?

Clare Bear

Oh sorry I have a boyfriend but thanks anyway.

Only thing that works for me.

LadyJ

I just broke up with someone and I'm not really ready to start seeing anyone.

I have to pee (then leave the club).

I'm gonna get sick (then vomit on him).

I'm not into you at all really, I just like to flirt with men when I go out. Get over it.

Lands Leaving

St Bill wrote: »

Ok, I was out last Saturday having a great night, chatting to anyone passing. Unfortunately, two guys (was talking to them at different times) thought I was into them because I was talking to them, and eventually got pi*sed off because I wouldn't give them my phone number. Cue a deathstare from one, and insults from the other which, needless to say, put a bit of a dampener on the night
I don't want to be rude (as I don't want to add fuel to the 'Irish women are b*tches' inferno!). So what do you do when the whole 'Can I have your number?' bit comes up? Any nice one-liners to deflect bad feeling?

If I can have your babies.

If I can have your bank account details

If you wear this *present hot pink thong*

If you kiss my friend here *point to closest large angry male*

*shrug* If you like trans-sexuals.

Or just go with 'I have a boyfriend', simple but effective.

Kimbot

Or the best one would be........

Your face offends my mirror!! ala Kevin and Perry

Rogueish

There's no way to soften the blow to a guy whose ego is so overinflated that they cannot accept that you do not want their number.

Just be quietly insistent that you do not give your number out to strangers. If they still insist, tell them thank you for the compliment but that by pushing the issue they are not making a good impression. If they don't get the message move away.

Just remember that you cannot be responsible for another's ego and don't let it ruin your night just take it as a compliment.

St Bill

Thanks for your replies, they've cheered me right up!

And on a side note, I knew that pink thong would come in handy

LadyJ

Actually the easiest way is to say "Oh sure, it's 08(insert fake no. here).

Lands Leaving

LadyJ wrote: »

Actually the easiest way is to say "Oh sure, it's 08(insert fake no. here).

Do women actually do that? I've never come across it, although I know how to take no for an answer

echosound

LOL @ Lands Leaving!
yeah - "I have a boyfriend" usually works just fine. If they're overly intimidating, casually mention your over-protective husband will be calling to pick you up on the way home from a night's deerhunting or something.

However if they're being rude to you, I wouldn't hesitate to be rude right back and tell them to eff off.

LadyJ

Lands Leaving wrote: »

Do women actually do that? I've never come across it, although I know how to take no for an answer

I did it once a few years ago because the guy was
being so annoying and he was a real asshole so I thought it'd be the easiest way.

Worked anyway.

tallaght01

definitely just say you have a boyfriend.

All guys know it's not neccesarily true....but we know what it means

Lands Leaving

LadyJ wrote: »

I did it once a few years ago because the guy was
being so annoying and he was a real asshole so I thought it'd be the easiest way.

Worked anyway.

What if he says ring me so I have your number? Girls have said it to me, so it could happen. Unless its just a girl thing to say it. Men don't think that far ahead!

LadyJ

Lands Leaving wrote: »

What if he says ring me so I have your number? Girls have said it to me, so it could happen. Unless its just a girl thing to say it. Men don't think that far ahead!

He didn't, that's all that matters!

Lands Leaving

Haha, good point! lucky escape!

Latchy

Shyness stops a lot of guys asking girls for their number and vice versa ,fear of rejection lol

Lockstep

Lands Leaving wrote: »

If you wear this *present hot pink thong*

THAT ACTUALLY HAPPENED TO ME!

Kinda, she gave me a thong as a birhtday present. I was so freaked out and refused to go near it and threw it away. Then she later told me it was a joke and I relaxed.

MagicMarker

If you're not into them at all then mention a boyfriend (even if fictional) during the conversation itself. This way they shouldn't ask in the first place. I wouldn't ask a girl for her number if she spoke about a boyfriend. Then again some men like a challenge.

Star Lord

Lands Leaving wrote: »

What if he says ring me so I have your number? Girls have said it to me, so it could happen. Unless its just a girl thing to say it. Men don't think that far ahead!

I do think that far ahead... when I get a girl number I say I'll ring you so you have mine too...

If you gave a fake number and wanna avoid that tell them your phone is dead, and they should just text you tomorrow and give their name...

smaoifs

Worked in a call centre before and we had a team mobile in case lines ever went down or whatever. Mondays used be such a laugh going through all the messages on it from Friday and Saturday nights. Everyone used give that number out as their own.

Black Swan

When with friends in pubs, clubs, or bars and don't want to be bothered, I wear my Mum's engagement ring. Flash that, and they go away. Problem solved.

tallaght01

Blue_Lagoon wrote: »

When with friends in pubs, clubs, or bars and don't want to be bothered, I wear my Mum's engagement ring. Flash that, and they go away. Problem solved.

so does that mean ur mum gets hit on every weekend coz she has no ring??

Latchy

tallaght01 wrote: »

so does that mean ur mum gets hit on every weekend coz she has no ring??

And by the same logic the guy who get the thumbs down this week is 'Hot 'Hot 'Hot the following week , such is wimmins , very strange creatures indeed .

Lemming

Why? Why play games with people's heads? Why not just be honest and say 'sorry but I'm not interested.' or some such? It's a sh*tty thing to have done for no other reason that the other person is being a coward and doesn't want to ruin their own moment of self-indulging egotism.

I mean, if you are that afraid of the other person's reaction so constantly that you have to lie ... should you not be questioning the situations you are allowing yourself be placed in?

easyontheeye

whats wrong with aul faithful " sorry i have a boyfriend/girlfriend" they dont know that!

b3t4

I used to use the "I'm not interested" line for a while but some guys can be a little too pushy and rather than have to deal with that I've found the "I've a boyfriend" works 99% of the time. There is that 1% that will still chance their luck though.

A.

Cathmandooo

'you'll have to speak up I'm wearing a towel' and walk off, it'll stun them into silence.

St Bill

Cathooo wrote: »

'you'll have to speak up I'm wearing a towel' and walk off, it'll stun them into silence.

Or 'Sorry I'm going through a tunnel, you're breaking up'.

St Bill

Lemming wrote: »

I mean, if you are that afraid of the other person's reaction so constantly that you have to lie ... should you not be questioning the situations you are allowing yourself be placed in?

You're right, I won't venture out again in future. I'll just live the rest of my days out in my bedroom, talking to my hand.

WindSock

Just start scratching yourself between your legs. although, it may not work for some guys.

Malteaser!

'I already have a boyfriend'

Though some of them don't seem to care about that, or else they get p!ssed coz you been 'leading them on' by even talking to them in the first place!!

MagicMarker

Malteaser! wrote: »

'I already have a boyfriend'

Though some of them don't seem to care about that, or else they get p!ssed coz you been 'leading them on' by even talking to them in the first place!!

Yeah!! Damn wimmins leading us on! Don't talk to us if you're not interested in a shag!! Common sense people!!

pretty*monster

MagicMarker wrote: »

If you're not into them at all then mention a boyfriend (even if fictional) during the conversation itself.

What if it turned out they had an attractive friend? Chances ruined.

Honestly if you're paying attention to signals and so forth it should be obvious well in advance that a bloke is going to ask for your number and you can manouvre yourself out of the conversation. If it's not obvious in advance then you shouldn't mind being rude since yre man clearly didn't put the effort in.

witchywoman

just rattle off a fake number or your own number with a digit or 2 wrong, saves embarrasment. and if your unlucky enough to bump into them again and find you want to give your number, youll only be slightly different number wise. and therefore wont be found out

DJ_Spider

You could say you are in a lesbian relationship, but some men find that a challenge/turn on! Fake phone numbers are good or why not set up a spam email. I have several email addys, some I give to everyone, some to friends, some for work and some only for 'special people' (I have special needs!) Then you can get to know them better through email and decide if they are worty of your attention/real phone number etc.

DJ Spider

Solarball10

Saying you have a boyfriend doesn't work unless he's actually there with ya....the other guy wil go "oh, so where is he tonight?" or "if i was your b/f,I wouldn't let you out of my sight" and continue flirting!

LouOB

MagicMarker wrote: »

Yeah!! Damn wimmins leading us on! Don't talk to us if you're not interested in a shag!! Common sense people!!

and if we dont talk to you we are b*tches

if we act off as we are not interested (or have OH) then we are seen as fridgid or at b*tch - ohHH but if we are polite and nice we are leading the guy on....
There is no middle ground

tribulus

What type of guys have you all been talking to?

RxQueen

i got this on saturday, i said that i didnt know my number as it was new, blah blah he gave me his instead.

EamonnKeane

DJ_Spider wrote: »

...Then you can get to know them better through email and decide if they are worty of your attention/real phone number etc.

Wasn't someone going on about men's egos earlier?

Crumble Froo

Lands Leaving wrote: »

Do women actually do that? I've never come across it, although I know how to take no for an answer

yep, most definitely. a friend of mine used to go out, find a guy to kiss on the dancefloor, tehn come home (with me, not the guy), but would often give him her number, due to general drunkeness, then end up texting him out of general boredom (when he texted her first), usually ending in some drama/saga/whatever... so we made a rule that if she had to give out a number, give him mine, and i would happily tell him to go **** himself and stop contacting me.

very efficient work there.

*Lees*

tribulus wrote: »

What type of guys have you all been talking to?

+ 1

When I tell them I have a boyfriend that's always the end of it!!!

Kazobel

Lands Leaving wrote: »

*shrug* If you like trans-sexuals.

Never, ever say that one not even as a joke, Drunk guys can get really offended if they think you're serious and will usually just punch you assuming you to be male.

The boyfriend one is the best or just make up a number.

Malteaser!

ozzyoh wrote: »

Saying you have a boyfriend doesn't work unless he's actually there with ya....the other guy wil go "oh, so where is he tonight?" or "if i was your b/f,I wouldn't let you out of my sight" and continue flirting!

I actally get that too, it's so annoying!!

At that stage I"d say something 'oh, I have to run to the bathroom, I promsie I'll be back in two minutes' then just not come back!!

Stabshauptmann

Its really simple.

Lads will only be annoyed at not getting your number if (they think) you have been leading them on.

There is friendly, jokingly flirty and being a cock teasing bitch. If you are the latter, and someone tells you you are the latter, dont go boo hooing that someone got annoyed with you.

Some people will ofcourse think that just because you say hello to them that you want to go home with them. I was traveling with a guy like that for a few months and it was so damn annoying. The way to deal with them is also very simple. Say you dont give out your number to strangers and if they say why were you flirting with me etc just say simple that you werent.

Ofcourse problem is some women (claim they) dont even realise some of the signals they are sending out.

Stabshauptmann

Malteaser! wrote: »

I actally get that too, it's so annoying!!

At that stage I"d say something 'oh, I have to run to the bathroom, I promsie I'll be back in two minutes' then just not come back!!

So you first lie then avoid then bitch about them anonymously. Do women not deal with problems at all?

spinandscribble

its annoying how you cant even talk to ppl without them assuming you're coming on to them. its because of this i dont even talk to guys unless i already know them (or even through a friend) or my bfs there as it causes problems and i dont want to lead anyone on.
i wish ppl wore signs in bars/clubs "single but not looking for anything but fun", in a relationship, just here for the craic", "single and desparate".... *sigh* if only life was so simple...:)

milli

spinandscribble wrote: »

its annoying how you cant even talk to ppl without them assuming you're coming on to them. its because of this i dont even talk to guys unless i already know them (or even through a friend) or my bfs there as it causes problems and i dont want to lead anyone on.
i wish ppl wore signs in bars/clubs "single but not looking for anything but fun", in a relationship, just here for the craic", "single and desparate".... *sigh* if only life was so simple...:)

Aah reminds me of the traffic light discos in college..

Gauge

LadyJ wrote: »

Actually the easiest way is to say "Oh sure, it's 08(insert fake no. here).

I tried that when I was tipsy last year and a guy wouldn't leave me alone. Gave him a fake number and it backfired when he said 'Now I'll give you a missed call and you'll have mine! '

Someone picked up, he got confused, and I legged it. Next time I'm sticking to the 'I have a boyfriend' line

SarahSassy

The best thing is to say 'Ill take your number'. Then you have the choice whether or not to call them

Rattlehead_ie

tallaght01 wrote: »

definitely just say you have a boyfriend.

All guys know it's not neccesarily true....but we know what it means

I'll agree with Tallaght on this one, even I know what that means

The best thing is to say 'Ill take your number'. Then you have the choice whether or not to call them

I think thats a fair point............although I think that could fuel the "Irish Women are Biatchs" Thread. Imagine the guy sitting at home the next night thinking what an bitch she didnt text or ring like she said she would