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Man... bike... WTF?! [Merged]

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13

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    #62
    star-pants
    Closed Accounts Posts: 13,429 ✭✭✭✭star-pants


    :confused:

    that seems the most unobvious thing to simulate sex with... how would that even work??
    Not sure I want to know. And how is it an offence?

    oddness...


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    #63
    tallaght01
    Closed Accounts Posts: 5,778 ✭✭✭tallaght01


    hahahah it's true HillBilly.

    The todger is slowly improving.

    BUT, it's only day 8 today. Another 3 weeks MINIMUM before I can think about crackin one off.

    Painful days, bro, painful days :-P


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    #64
    jester77
    Registered Users Posts: 11,262 ✭✭✭✭jester77


    tallaght01 wrote: »
    hahahah it's true HillBilly.

    The todger is slowly improving.

    BUT, it's only day 8 today. Another 3 weeks MINIMUM before I can think about crackin one off.

    Painful days, bro, painful days :-P

    aha, and the truth finally comes out tallaght01 :p


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    #65
    xzanti
    Moderators, Entertainment Moderators Posts: 10,437 Mod ✭✭✭✭xzanti


    Hill Billy wrote: »
    The guy was having a w@nk in the privacy of his bedroom. No harm done.


    My thoughts exactly.. What goes on in a mans bedroom is his own business.. I just hope used protection..

    helmetws8.jpg :D


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    #66
    Lump
    Registered Users Posts: 10,984 ✭✭✭✭Lump


    I thought this was gonna be a thread about a local slapper ;)


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    #67
    Senna
    Registered Users Posts: 8,800 ✭✭✭Senna


    tallaght01 wrote: »
    Both cleaners, who were "extremely shocked", told the hostel manager who called police.
    .

    So let me get this right, they walked into a room, hired and paid for by the occupant, he was alone and having an unusual w**k.
    They tell the manager and instead of the manager bursting his ass laughting, he calls the police.
    Anyone else thinking the hostel manager, must have been a woman?
    Or this was a prick of a guest and they just wanted rid of him.
    One of the two i'd say.


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    #68
    Pompey Magnus
    Registered Users Posts: 5,406 ✭✭✭Pompey Magnus


    Stewart had denied the offence, claiming it was caused by a misunderstanding after he had too much to drink.

    What kind of a misunderstanding could that be? I mean how many pints would you need to drink before the beer googles kick in for a bike?


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    #69
    2 stroke
    Registered Users Posts: 2,921 ✭✭✭2 stroke


    Nice looking bike. I could go for a bit of that myself.


    Seriously though, if one can be prosecuted for having sex with a bicycle, surely you could be prosecuted for using a vibrator. I'm unlikely to be the only guy to see a girlfriend taking a gearstick, surely she should be locked up. (I sold the car but still have that gearnob over my bed)


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    #70
    star-pants
    Closed Accounts Posts: 13,429 ✭✭✭✭star-pants


    2 stroke wrote: »
    Seriously though, if one can be prosecuted for having sex with a bicycle, surely you could be prosecuted for using a vibrator.

    that's a valid point -- if they walked in on a girl ..doing..that... would the same rule be applied?


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    #71
    ScumLord
    Registered Users Posts: 28,789 ✭✭✭✭ScumLord


    This makes absolutely no sense what soever. Tis wrong! :confused:


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    #72
    kevmy
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,178 ✭✭✭kevmy


    ScumLord wrote: »
    This makes absolutely no sense what soever. Tis wrong! :confused:

    Even if it is wrong is it illegal. Yeah if he was doing it in the middle of the street but he was doing it in his room. Now he's on the sex offenders list. Imagine trying to get a job when your on the sex offenders list when all your a danger to is solitary bikes in private settings


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    #73
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 0 ✭ [Deleted User]


    He was probably only testing out the suspension.


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    #74
    2 stroke
    Registered Users Posts: 2,921 ✭✭✭2 stroke


    Do we call persons caught riding bicycles cyclepaths or pedalophiles?


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    #75
    Overheal
    Registered Users Posts: 81,917 ✭✭✭✭Overheal


    weird... i read this story weeks ago! why is BBC news only reporting it now?

    EDIT: yeah here http://www.anorak.co.uk/strange-but-true/177208.html

    October 27th, 2007

    how is BBC so stupid? This isnt the first case ive heard of them reporting stale news.


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    #76
    ScumLord
    Registered Users Posts: 28,789 ✭✭✭✭ScumLord


    kevmy wrote: »
    Even if it is wrong is it illegal. Yeah if he was doing it in the middle of the street but he was doing it in his room. Now he's on the sex offenders list. Imagine trying to get a job when your on the sex offenders list when all your a danger to is solitary bikes in private settings
    No it's not illegal in any way, You have people publicly marrying dogs (it happens in Europe too) they are more than likely having sex with the dog/small horse/donkey/cat/chicken, people laugh at the marriage but everyone knows whats going on behind the scenes.

    Unless there's something not being said in the report. Like he was living in a hostel maybe if it was a dorm and he started doing it in front of everybody but it's certainly not worth a 2 year sentence.


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    #77
    Overheal
    Registered Users Posts: 81,917 ✭✭✭✭Overheal


    Hey - give them credit: at least theyre pre-marital about their beastiality.


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    #78
    2 stroke
    Registered Users Posts: 2,921 ✭✭✭2 stroke


    I'm so curious, I'm going to have to try it. Pass the 3 in 1.


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    #79
    Terry
    Registered Users Posts: 26,061 ✭✭✭✭Terry


    Overheal wrote: »
    weird... i read this story weeks ago! why is BBC news only reporting it now?

    EDIT: yeah here http://www.anorak.co.uk/strange-but-true/177208.html

    October 27th, 2007

    how is BBC so stupid? This isnt the first case ive heard of them reporting stale news.
    You also informed us of it: http://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=2055172830


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    #80
    Dave!
    Closed Accounts Posts: 27,857 ✭✭✭✭Dave!


    Not sure what part of the bike he would be penetrating...

    Either way, ridiculous if he was charged over it.


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    #81
    2 stroke
    Registered Users Posts: 2,921 ✭✭✭2 stroke


    I often wondered why some landladies banned bicycles in the house.


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    #82
    2 stroke
    Registered Users Posts: 2,921 ✭✭✭2 stroke


    Riding a bike while drunk isn't easy. Brewers droop I think, or maybe I just havent met the right bike.


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    #83
    A Dub in Glasgo
    Registered Users Posts: 17,026 ✭✭✭✭A Dub in Glasgo


    Overheal wrote: »
    weird... i read this story weeks ago! why is BBC news only reporting it now?

    EDIT: yeah here http://www.anorak.co.uk/strange-but-true/177208.html

    October 27th, 2007

    how is BBC so stupid? This isnt the first case ive heard of them reporting stale news.

    Eh? The BBC are reporting the sentence arising from the charge. Your link and previous thread are reporting that the guy has been charged


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    #84
    Terry
    Registered Users Posts: 26,061 ✭✭✭✭Terry


    Makes a mockery of the sex offenders list.


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    #85
    whiskeyman
    Registered Users Posts: 12,564 ✭✭✭✭whiskeyman


    Jeez AH?!? What's wrong with you today?
    I can't believe no-one posted the most obvious answer to this..



    He wasn't straight





    He wasn't gay





    He was clearly bike-sexual...





    That is all :D


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    #86
    source
    Registered Users Posts: 5,270 ✭✭✭source


    The last time i checked a breach of the peace was a public order offence, and this was done in the privacy of his own room which he paid for!!!! If anything the cleaners should be arrested for invasion of privacy and adding him to the sex offenders list is ridiculous that's just after screwing up his life for using an unusual sex aid while having a ****, Abso-friggin-loutly ridiculous.I could understand it if he was doing it in the hall of the hostel but in his room????!!!!!????!!!!


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    #87
    Rhyme
    Moderators, Education Moderators Posts: 8,561 Mod ✭✭✭✭Rhyme


    whiskeyman wrote: »
    He was clearly bike-sexual...

    Wow. Just... wow.


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    #88
    YeatsCounty
    Registered Users Posts: 1,474 ✭✭✭YeatsCounty


    foinse wrote: »
    The last time i checked a breach of the peace was a public order offence, and this was done in the privacy of his own room which he paid for!!!! If anything the cleaners should be arrested for invasion of privacy and adding him to the sex offenders list is ridiculous that's just after screwing up his life for using an unusual sex aid while having a ****, Abso-friggin-loutly ridiculous.I could understand it if he was doing it in the hall of the hostel but in his room????!!!!!????!!!!
    Completely agreed. Even the report says that the cleaners entered after they assumed that there was no-one there. He was in the privacy of his own place, having sex with an inanimate object. The only reason I can see for him being charged is if he saw them enter the room but he kept pumping away at the bike regardless (see what I did there?).


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    #89
    Hester
    Closed Accounts Posts: 172 ✭✭Hester


    YeatsCounty wrote: »
    The only reason I can see for him being charged is if he saw them enter the room but he kept pumping away at the bike regardless (see what I did there?).
    From what I can remember of reading about this a few weeks ago, that's exactly what happened.:(:o


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    #90
    RoyalMarine
    Closed Accounts Posts: 5,824 ✭✭✭RoyalMarine


    wrote:
    Karl Watkins, an electrician, was jailed for having sex with pavements in Redditch, Worcs, in 1993.

    did anyone else notice this on the bottom of the add? :D:D


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    #91
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 0 ✭ [Deleted User]


    RoyalMarineComm wrote: »
    did anyone else notice this on the bottom of the add? :D:D
    Yes! he was ordered to "kerb" his activities.


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