Whats the biggest con you've pulled?

JohnCleary

exCrumlinBoyo wrote:

When we were teenagers in secondary school we were asked to make a collection for the Irish Wheel Chair Association. The school gave up some buckets and tins and expected a small scale fundraiser. The gave us a letter stating we were collecting on behalf of the school.

So we knew we could make a few quid out of this by going door to door and collecting. We decided we would keep 70% and we would give the school back 30% so they could give to the Irish Wheel Chair Association. So we started on a Friday evening and made a few quid going door to door. It was not as much as we expected. Someone then mentioned why we don’t go to the pubs in Crumlin Villiage. Great idea we thought. Went to each pub, showed the bar manager our letter and made a killing big time. We hit 4 or 5 pubs and make about 600 Irish Pound at the time. We were over the moon. We hit the pubs again on the Saturday night and made another few hundred quid. Someone again mentioned that there was no one scheduled for the church gates on Sunday and if we go and talk with the busy body in the parish hall, show her our letter, it should not be a problem.

So there we were 6:45 am on Sunday morning getting permission to collect, which we did no problem. This time we invested in big buckets and there was 4 of us. We hit all the masses that morning and afternoon and made a killing.

At this stage, not realizing how successful the collection would be at the beginning I was feeling guilty. The guilt really kicked in when this old guy coming out of church, must have been about 85 years old, almost ready for a wheel chair him self, threw in a 20 pound note into my bucket. That was it I said to me self, I was like mister you don’t have to give that much, here have some change, so he was not hearing any of it.

In the end, we make about 1400 Irish pounds that weekend, we gave the school 400 and we kept the 1000 between 4 of us.

We would also rig the spot the ball cards. We would pull out the first few threads and find out where the ball was and sow it back up, and see each panel putting some oul’wans name down the road on it. That was very profitable I tell you.

To this day I still feel guilty about it, but hey I was a young entrepreneur….

You're going straight to hell, soon I hope

exCrumlinBoyo

JohnCleary wrote:

You're going straight to hell, soon I hope

Why would you wish such a thing?

Dooom

So many, can't really list them all. Most were just little things. One of more costly ones being scamming my brother out of €1500 for myself. Worked well at the time, but it's sucking now (see Dylan? I feel bad! Giz a 360 for xmas...).

Black Swan

Acting as if I knew what I was doing in my current work. Shhhhhhhh! Don't tell anyone!

chamlis

Blue_Lagoon wrote:

Acting as if I knew what I was doing in my current work. Shhhhhhhh! Don't tell anyone!

Ai. I hear that....

JohnCleary

Spike wrote:

So many, can't really list them all. Most were just little things. One of more costly ones being scamming my brother out of €1500 for myself. Worked well at the time, but it's sucking now (see Dylan? I feel bad! Giz a 360 for xmas...).

You conned.. your own BROTHER? Holy sh1t man ye are all a crowd of cnuts, this thread has made me feel like a much better person

netwhizkid

In Secondary School I was betted £20 (four fellas lunch money £5 each) I wouldn't have the balls to take on the 5th year big fella who was about 6ft 2". I accepted the challenge being a first year at the time and on my second or third week into the Secondary School.

Anway I called the big brute aside and offered to split the money with him if he'd let me knock him to the ground and win!! He agreed and offered to push me over at lunch to get out spat going naturally he did. I told him we'd sort it out after the bell and I went to take him on with a large group of gawkers and scrap scrap etc. going on! I pretended to not want to take him on saying I'm not going at him even if I was paid.

Then the other fools started flying in with bets. Then I accepted and knocked him to the ground. I got my money about £25 it turned out be and split it evenly with yer man and we became good buddy's for the rest of the school year until he left for college. That was my greatest con I can say really.

shane86

Lump wrote:

My lawer has advised me to remove this incriminating evidence

John

You posted that from work didnt you?

Ya might want to PM the chap a few posts down and tell him to alter his quoted text.....

Heisenberg.

This post has been deleted.

racso1975

Financially it would as another poster said better to not post.....


People wise telling women i have worked with when i was younger that i love them just so i get to sleep with them and u would be amazed how often it worked

And if mrs racso reads this please note WHEN "I WAS YOUNGER" ergo you cannot hold this against me till the day i die. ask anybody. IPSO FACTO*



*I'm sure it is used out of context but do not correct me

bluto63

JohnCleary wrote:

You conned.. your own BROTHER? Holy sh1t man ye are all a crowd of cnuts, this thread has made me feel like a much better person

Same. Some of you seem like horrible people. Clever, but horrible...

Dooom

JohnCleary wrote:

You conned.. your own BROTHER? Holy sh1t man ye are all a crowd of cnuts, this thread has made me feel like a much better person

Ah well it wasn't conning as such, more of a "I swear to god I'll pay you back in a month" type thing that just dragged on for a while. Well that's the way I see it, and I'm sticking to it.

faceman

Jaysus some of you are looney! Im surprised no one claims to be married to 2 people at the same time!!

coffee_cake

faceman wrote:

Jaysus some of you are looney! Im surprised no one claims to be married to 2 people at the same time!!

this is only page 3, give it time >.<

Sofaspud

faceman wrote:

Jaysus some of you are looney! Im surprised no one claims to be married to 2 people at the same time!!

Well now that you mention it . . .

Car Mad

faceman wrote:

Jaysus some of you are looney! Im surprised no one claims to be married to 2 people at the same time!!

all 3 of em asked me ok:D i cant help it:p i also pretend i know what im doing at work (dont say anything);)

Muzzy

Worked in bars for nearly six years and loved it but I always hated working for private parties, people would think that because they rented a room that they could act however well they pleased.

So, if a party consisted of muppets I would be working behind the bar and would take a Euro out of everyone's change from their round. Do it all night, it would build up into a couple hundred quid a night on top of my wages.

I'm not ashamed of it, only did it to ignorant muppets with no manners, I know that still doesn't make me right.

andrew

anto-t wrote:

i con ed a huge sporting event into thinking that i wrote for a newspaper.... even tho i was 17 and dyslectic and could brealy write.... got loads of free stuff witch involved them putting me up in a hotel for 3 nights, media passes to all areas... a sticker for my car so i could park everywhere, meals.. and the rormal like pens paper maps etc etc and a few funny looks going into the media room after everyday.... going to do the same thing in the new year to get a full year media pass... witch works for most events....

How'd you do that!? Tell us (or at least me) please!!!!

Capt'n Midnight

rb_ie wrote:

The greatest con I ever pulled was convincing the world I don't exist

But you don't exist

coffee_cake

Capt'n Midnight wrote:

But you don't exist

or were you just wishing? lol

bug

netwhizkid wrote:

In Secondary School I was betted £20 (four fellas lunch money £5 each) I wouldn't have the balls to take on the 5th year big fella who was about 6ft 2". I accepted the challenge being a first year at the time and on my second or third week into the Secondary School.

Anway I called the big brute aside and offered to split the money with him if he'd let me knock him to the ground and win!! He agreed and offered to push me over at lunch to get out spat going naturally he did. I told him we'd sort it out after the bell and I went to take him on with a large group of gawkers and scrap scrap etc. going on! I pretended to not want to take him on saying I'm not going at him even if I was paid.

Then the other fools started flying in with bets. Then I accepted and knocked him to the ground. I got my money about £25 it turned out be and split it evenly with yer man and we became good buddy's for the rest of the school year until he left for college. That was my greatest con I can say really.

thats a really cool story.

Royale with Cheese

About a month back after a night out I walked into burger fairly hammered. Big crowd there as would be expected. Walked up to order only for the staff to start shouting out something, looking for somebody who's order was ready. Without even thinking I said yeah, that's me. Took it and just walked out. Got to the bus stop to discover it was a XL bacon double cheese meal. Best night ever.

admiralofthefleet

not really a con but i was standing outside the breffni in blackrock one night having a smoke and i stopped 3 girls for id who were going in only for fags, the looks on their faces when they saw me follow them in and sit down and start drinking again. i was half tempted to say '€10 in tonight ladies' while at the door as well

DublinEvents

I suppose it would be a bit out of place to talk about ethics in this thread, eh? Tut tut. Be nice people. Don't be conning anyone, ok? Good

wyndham

..

wyndham

exCrumlinBoyo wrote:

When we were teenagers in secondary school we were asked to make a collection for the Irish Wheel Chair Association...................

Not really a con. Just theft. From a charity.

Harpoon

rb_ie wrote:

The greatest con I ever pulled was convincing the world I don't exist

oh you bast*ard thats what I was going to say.

Paddy_Irishman

I pulled a con with my 3 bro's before. We were all going to get a nice present for our dad's 50th birthday but we wanted it to be a memoriable gift, something our dad would look at and remember the story of how he got it and laugh.

Just to state, we didnt actually steal anything. We just used abit of 'social engineering' to get people to do what we wanted .

So we were all in town and the lame idea's were coming out about what to get for our dad. Power tool's. Some PC equipment. A Digital camera. A new TV. A collection of DVD's music. A nice collection of cloths, suit, swanky trench coat, gloves, hat etc. We didnt think much of any of the idea's really until we all got to thinking about our dad's nick name, Delboy. Now ye of course this is already a famous name from the show but that's the whole reason we called him it, cus he was a bit of a wheeler, dealer and geezer .

So now we had our plan, we would have to do something Delboy would do to get a present. Got us thinking. In Only fools and horses the Delboy hit it big when an old pocket watch was discovered which they thought was worth nothing turned out to be some ultra rare watch worth millions and they had it for years and never knew. Now we had what to get him. It wasnt about the cost. Lets face it, a pocket watch isnt very expensive.

At this point we had our plan and are target. Now we needed a mark. We did a little window shopping around town and found our two marks.

The first mark was a shop in town I wont name for obvious reasons. It had a great selection of Gold chains, fairly pricey as well. So anyway I went in a did a quick scan of the chains and picked the one we wanted first. Now we had to come up with a plan. My older brother is abit of a flash harry. he is usually in a suit, or at least a smart jacket and pants all the time etc. He was quite well dressed that morning and so to me and my brother in our jeans and t-shirts looked like a business man really. We had our lead Confidence player, now we needed a Shill*.

A Shill is somebody who try to encourage the mark by pretending to believe the trickster. This Shill wouldnt have a clue he was actually being a Shill as it turned out. We were looking for a Japanese guy, about 40ish, with a proud look, dressed fairly smart. What we found was a Japanese guy, about 30, with loads of spots and goin bald, dressed in what we could only describe as the worst golfing outfit every and the biggest digital camera you could possibly buy. Anyway, my Flashy older brother actually knew very very basic Japanese, he took it up to be flash and ended up not going to more than 10 classes basically but he's a smart fella so he remembered quite abit it turned out.

The Plan was to ask this poor Japanese tourist to come into the shop we wanted to get this cool gold chain from. He would go in with my Older brother dressed in the nice business suit and my brother would show him around. This was an irish tradition and my brother just happened to be fascinated with the gold chains they had in the shop. My brother would then bring in this Japanese guy, walk over to the counter and make it seem that this japanese guy was a big shot japanese top executive, on a holiday in ireland but still had an interest in doing business. My brother would be his personal assistant. Spewing out basic badly pronounced Japanese to this guy and pretend to be translating what the Very important japanse company president was saying. We were counting on nobody knowing japanese and the shop to over look the fact this guy was so badly dressed it would make santa go red on christmas day. What my brother would be 'translating' is that the Company Director like these chains and thinks he could sell them back in japan but would of course, need a sample before he could 'sell' them. Our hope to get them to voluntarily give us the chain as a gift .

The next part of the plan was to make this japanese Director look like, although he dressed like crap, he still spent big. No problem there. We were in town near a top hotel. We rang up a limo service and put a fake order in for somebody staying at the hotel, easily done, and then had them pull up outside this shop. As soon as the limo appeared, my brother and the Japanese guy would appear from behind it and walk into the shop, instant presence. Obviously with 3 of us, we could time this quite well. We then all went to the bank and took out 500 euro in 20's each. This money was going to be blatantly stuffed into the Jap guys bag by my brother just before they got into the shop, he told him it was an Irish good look tradition, a mini-pot of gold haha. And that he could not give it back until my brother said lephrachan, which funnily the jap guy knew in english...

So the limo pulled up and my brother had just conviced the Jap guy to go into this shop. Like 'clock' work they appeared from behind the Limo and walked into the shop. Everybody in the shop was looking at my bro and the Jap guy while thinking " Who the hell is this guy and that irish lad?" My brother ushered the Jap straight over to the gold chain counter. While walking towards it, the Jap guy was so over the moon to go on an adventure he was snapping pictures every 2 or 3 seconds with his HUGE camera. Me and my other brother outside were thinking, oh man there never gonna believe this.

Anyway, my brother eventually makes it over to the counter with this Jap guy and as soon as he gets to the desk, what we could only describe as the manager, pushed the sales assistant out of the way and stood in her place smilin really widely at my brother and the jap guy. We couldnt believe it, they were only in the door and the suckers were falling for it but we didnt count our chickens of course.

My brother got the counter, with his hands together in front of him, bowed his head and introduced this guy as.... You'll have to ask him, he still changes the name he says everytime we tell the story and each time it gets funnier I swear . The Manager gives this lame, ass sucked bow and says how he is delighted that such an important man has come into his store and is there anything he can help him with. The Japanese guy is standing at the counter with my brother and snaps a pic right in this managers face. We were in stiches outside, dunno how anybody kept a straight face. So my brother goes on to give this bull**** story about how He is a very important director taking his 3 days holiday a year to see ireland haha, probably takes 3 days to go from japan to Ireland and back again !

The manager is lapping this up because he must smell money. Why you ask? Because while my brother was telling the manager about the Director's trip, he mentioned jokinly that he wants to see a 'lephrachan' of course . So the Jap guy as quick as a flash, takes out this wad of 20's and slams it on the counter while saying take it to my brother in Japanese. My brother turns to the manager and then proceed's to tell him that The most estimeed and honourable director has seen this Gold necklace < pointing at it> and thinks he can sell 1,000's upon 1,000's of them in Japan. That the Director wants to buy one right now and that he is willing to buy 100,000 of them every year as it's a geninue irish necklace and that would sell in Japan.

The Manager is so excited that he thinks he has found his own little pot of gold. he had the biggest smile on his face and started actually bowing. he hadnt even spoke. He then says " Oh it would be our "Shops" greatest pleasure to supply your great company but I wonder would the Director please accept this Chain as a gift from our most humble shop to your most excellent Company. He can use it to show to the Board of Directors when he returns to Japan and use it to show our appreciation for the business." I dont know how my brother didnt laugh in his face. My brother nodded and then turned to the Jap guy and said in Japanese " This man says you are very handsome and seem to have a large penis". The Jap guy started roaring out laughing, probably at the pronounciation, if thats what he even said I dont know. The Jap guy is laughing his heart out and grabs the hand of the manager behind the counter while shaking. My brother solemly says " He accepts." My brother picked up the money off the table and the gold chain was put into his hand as a gift. They both then bowed and walked out of the shop. All 3 of us brought the Jap guy for a guiness in an early house and got him a nice slap up lunch as well, he laughed alot, was damn funny he didnt have a word of english .

That was part 1 of our Con. We had the Chain. Now we needed the watch.

admiralofthefleet

Royale with Cheese wrote:

About a month back after a night out I walked into burger fairly hammered. Big crowd there as would be expected. Walked up to order only for the staff to start shouting out something, looking for somebody who's order was ready. Without even thinking I said yeah, that's me. Took it and just walked out. Got to the bus stop to discover it was a XL bacon double cheese meal. Best night ever.

thats a good one, you put that idea into my head now

DublinEvents

Paddy_Irishman, woah!!!!! That was bloody good! Can't wait to read how you got the watch