Q&A with the Gnome

Doomspell

Why does Fear_the_Spoon never come onto Boards?? I swear shes only been on about twice:eek:

The Gnome

Doomspell wrote:

Why am I upsessed with Captain Jack Sparrow (Johnny Depp)?

Upsessed? While I am quite interested in all the facets of linguistics this particular word has stumped me in its meaning. Perhaps you meant obsessed? Perhaps we'll never know.

spacecoyote wrote:

Do gnomes marry & if they do can they have numerous wives?

Indeed we do, my dear spacecoyote, on both accounts. As most Gnomes are quite long lived it is only logical that we have more than one partner. However there are the odd few who limit their physical interactions to one of their wives. Indeed, it also works in reverse, many Gnomettes take several Gnomes for husbands. In summary we have a whole lot of love to go around.

boneless wrote:

Why do Gnomes keep breaking into my kitchen to do unsanitary things in my chip pan?

Facinating question, I can only put this bizarre occurence down to the Dark Gnomes. Our evil kin who have turned to the way of the Starling.

jules80 wrote:

dear wise and wonderful gnome, firsty let me apologise for the idle banter, but we were all waiting around eager for your return....

just a very simple question, what annoys you the most about people?

Your appy poly logie is accepted, think no more of it. The most annoying attribute of 'people' in general would have to be the disregard for their enviroment. This includes nature and others around them, such things infuriate me.

Doomspell wrote:

Why does Fear_the_Spoon never come onto Boards?? I swear shes only been on about twice

It would seem that 'Charlotte' is only a recent addition to our community. She has most likely not become used to our ways, maybe she's confused or wary. In time she will integrate herself or forget about us altogether. Time is the only factor.

boneless

I knew it was the Dark Gnomes all along but I needed confirmation oh Wise one... I will have to employ the secret weapon...

Jules

are the gnomes directly related to the Tuatha De Danann?

The Gnome

boneless wrote:

I knew it was the Dark Gnomes all along but I needed confirmation oh Wise one... I will have to employ the secret weapon...

Indeed you were quite right to seek it, they can be quite devious. Take care in your struggle.

jules80 wrote:

are the gnomes directly related to the Tuatha De Danann?

Irish Gnomes are yes, however other Gnomes are more directly related to the forefathers of the Tuatha De Dannan as Gnomes are present across the face of the planet whereas the Tuatha are strictly centred around the Celtic Isles therefore only Irish Gnomes are their decendants.

Jules

thank you for clearing that up!!! good night wise gnome

spacecoyote

When a gnome dies what happens in their afterlife?

Have their ever been any epic gnome-wars?

Jules

where are the roots of the gnome people, how did it all start, where they created as we were, or do they have a different story!!!

Lust4Life

Posted by The Wise Gnome:

Quote:
Originally Posted by spacecoyote
Do gnomes marry & if they do can they have numerous wives?

Indeed we do, my dear spacecoyote, on both accounts. As most Gnomes are quite long lived it is only logical that we have more than one partner. However there are the odd few who limit their physical interactions to one of their wives. Indeed, it also works in reverse, many Gnomettes take several Gnomes for husbands. In summary we have a whole lot of love to go around.

I am afraid if I were to try to become a Gnome for this reason and do it in the manner of cutting off my legs and reattaching my feet that I would then have to change my name to Consuelo.
Do you feel it would be worth all the trouble? Or should I just turn Mormon?

Hugs,

L4L

Jules

why do i have strange dreams which i am afraid to discuss here!

boneless

Why do I have a longing to run naked through convents?

Doomspell

Why can't I stop drinking tea?? *sips tea*

Jules

boneless wrote:

Why do I have a longing to run naked through convents?

why dont i live in a convent?

Lust4Life

Why does that remind me of a joke I heard recently?

Edit: Sorry blue, too long to type! But will at Gnome's request!

Black Swan

L4L Must tell us the joke...We need a laugh

Dirk Gently

why didnt I go to bed 6 hours ago?

Capt'n Midnight

IIRC in ye olde english the 'K' in Knight was pronounced cf. melvyn bragg & co.
So why is the 'g' silent in gnome and when did this happen and who happened and should we be worried about this conspiracy of silent letters sneaking up on us ?

Jules

i think we have been abandoned!!!!

boneless

I think the other little buggers are back w*nkin' in me chip pan!!!

Jules

maybe thats where gnome is... na he is too mature for that stuff!!!!

Jules

oh my god we have been abandoned.... what are we going to do how am i ment to know what im gonna do with my life!!!!

boneless

Captain Stethoscope might come to the rescue...

Jules

someone anyone help!!!!

takola

I can't believe ye've done it again. He's going to lose the plot over ye're idle chattering even after he's said it's not permitted!

The Gnome : If Limerick is referred to as Stab City, Why do most of its occupants prefer drive-by shootings?

Jules

its not idle chatter more like idol chatter, its all about him!!!!!

The Gnome

takola wrote:

I can't believe ye've done it again...

Indeed, things without all remedy should be without regard: what's done is done. I am hereby retiring from the game of sagely advice. Perhaps I will return someday, perhaps not.

Farewell to one and all.

takola

See ya round Gnome!

boneless

But I need more advice on the unsanitary ones....

Dg101

Just when I thought I was acquiring gnomish wisdom....

*cries*

*looks down at his foot-knees*

What was it all for!?

Hail 2 Da Chimp

TCN has truly decended in to chaos without my wisdome... tut tut even poor gnome has retired. Farewell my little friend.