Dating a relation

theHOFFman

Hi guys i met this girl in college and weve been chatting and flirting for ages, we were really getting into each other and finally hooked up last week for a date, everything went really well and we started to text

between the jigs and the reels we realised that my grandmother and her granddad were brother and sister, what relation does this make us to each other? Are we second or third cousins?

Is there anything wrong with what we are doing? We kinda at first took a step back and said okay this is a little wierd and went our seperate ways but then this week i couldnt stop thinking about her and last night she texted me wanting to know if i still have feelings for her or not because she thinks shes in love with me!

What do i do??????

casanova_kid

You're related and that is weird, i think that makes you second cousins but it all depends on what you're into.

Pighead

Buy a couple of banjos and give the Leitrim music scene the kick up the arse its needed for a long long time. You and your girlfriend/cousin are gonna be huge.

dundalk cailin

i think its quite far out the relation, eg my mams cousin is my 2nd cousin, after that im not sure..u could be 3rd cousins.
i wouldnt worry bout it too much

Repli

You are 2nd cousins - you have the same great-grandparents.. Just throwing in a little nugget of info there..

R-KEANE

i think you'll have a hard time discussing thing with your parents. I'd feel very very very strange in this situation. Actually, started typing this thinking I could offer some advice but I'm lost for words. Its your cousin. Are your grandparents still alive? What would they think? They'd probably freak. Make sure to do a thorough check on whether you are related or not.

zuma

As far as I know...there are no laws against...having relations....with even your 1st cousins in Ireland!!!

I think its a throwback from the days when we were part of the UK and "our Monarch's" partner was a first cousin or something.

I think your third cousins......thats pretty distant in my book!

theHOFFman

guys its great the advice, honest, i was really worried people in general would be freaked out by it, it can honestly happen to anyone,

its mad cause iv never had many girlfriends, iv never been very popular and when what seems to be a perfect girl who looks great, is intelligent and likes me to turns out to be my second or third cousin im all messed up about it, its like someone with divine powers has it in for me.

My nan is still alive and id rather say nothing to her, but i will most likely introduce her to the gfriend if things keep going the way they are as either my friend and explain the connection or my gfriend and not mention anything about being related. Her Grandad passed away a few years ago. I think my parents and hers might be okay with it but ill do anything to avoid telling them, i already half told my mum so it wont be to bad if i have to tell her, broke the ice so to speak.

blu_sonic

you should ask a doc if you had kids how would they work out?

I knew someone once who was going out with his first cousin.

Tbh, the only problem with it would be breeding which obviously isn't an issue here, and you're not first cousins, so I personally wouldn't care.
Your family might, but I don't think it's *that* big a deal.

daiixi

anyone who is freaked out by your relationship isn't worth the time of day.

theHOFFman

um yeah i tink its way way to early to be talking about kids so it should be okay on that line of things, im a little less un easy about it now. But i just never tuaght id get bitten by the bug or end up meeting a cousin, lol. I just keep trying to tell myself we are distant relations and thats all.

ballooba

Look at the guys nickname for god's sake. Pinch of salt.

R0ot

Thats pretty weird so it is, your chances of having a defect in any children you may have has increased by 50%. Nevermind move to sligo they'll never notice

R-KEANE

theHOFFman wrote:

um yeah i tink its way way to early to be talking about kids so it should be okay on that line of things, im a little less un easy about it now. But i just never tuaght id get bitten by the bug or end up meeting a cousin, lol. I just keep trying to tell myself we are distant relations and thats all.

well, how easy is it to tell yourself that? if its really difficult then you might have a problem. if you can easily brush it off, then you're fine.

R-KEANE

ballooba wrote:

Look at the guys nickname for god's sake. Pinch of salt.

why has knightrider done that sort of thing?

theHOFFman

mmm, i dunno seen as i havent seen her since but we are texting right now, i dont tink id have a problem and i doubt she would either, feck it lads ill give it a shot and let ye know how i get on.

scojones

Pighead wrote:

Buy a couple of banjos and give the Leitrim music scene the kick up the arse its needed for a long long time. You and your girlfriend/cousin are gonna be huge.

Oh man, post of the month for sure.

You're grand, go for it.

simu

Too close for comfort imho.

Adeptus Titanicus

Handy chart here. I've never been able to figure out this second cousin twice removed stuff till I saw this

http://www.comanchelodge.com/relationch.html

Anyhoo, as others have said, as your common ancestor is your great gandfather/mother, you are indeed second cousins.

If she's nice, what the hell! Go for it

theHOFFman

well looks run in the family anyways :-) cheers guys, ill be back with an update next week :-)

Sparky

Ah, one way or another we are all related to each other.

As far as I know its okay to have relations with your 3rd cousin. Its why I don't try to get a girl anywhere near my hometown 'cause morethanlikely they're all related to me.

riptide

theHOFFman wrote:

well looks run in the family anyways :-) cheers guys, ill be back with an update next week :-)

Hoff... you may want to check out whether there may be an increase in chance of genetic disorders if you 2 decide to have kids if a realtionship goes way down the line!

Rovi

To go slightly off topic, but still related (:rolleyes:), how about this one?-

My grandfather, his brother (my granduncle), and his sister (my grandaunt) were married to my grandmother (his wife), her sister (my granduncle's wife), and her brother (my grandaunt's husband).
Two brothers and a sister in one family married two sisters and a brother in another.

Anyone want to figure out the relationships between their great-grandchildren?


.

Binomate

Your kids are going to be classed as inbred by all of the other kids for their whole lives.

aidan_walsh

blu_sonic wrote:

you should ask a doc if you had kids how would they work out?

After one date, discussing kids is a pretty good way of ensuring that you'll never have to face the problem.

ferdi

OP, if you have to ask, you already know the answer.

Esel

Rovi wrote:

To go slightly off topic, but still related (:rolleyes:), how about this one?-

My grandfather, his brother (my granduncle), and his sister (my grandaunt) were married to my grandmother (his wife), her sister (my granduncle's wife), and her brother (my grandaunt's husband).
Two brothers and a sister in one family married two sisters and a brother in another.

Anyone want to figure out the relationships between their great-grandchildren?


.

Same as a 'simple' situation - you just go back to the common ancestor and count from there?

latenia

Afaik, 2nd cousins are in fact the most 'dangerous' in terms of the risk of any offspring being born with birth defects, even more so than 1st cousins.

latenia

Btw, there are over 3 billion women in the world.