Project:help friend get laid

LegacyUser

Before any idiot asks this thread is not about me but about a friend. (He is on boards, so I need to keep this anon). Basically friend is fat, ugly but charming and has no talent with girls. He needs help but tbh i'm not great myself (but alot better than him). Does anyone know somewhere I can bring him where there are available girls. Sorta like bars and stuff? He's 18 so too old for the Wezz. Any thoughts.

BoozyBabe

Good Friend wrote:

Basically friend is fat, ugly but charming and has no talent with girls.

:eek: With friends like you, who needs enemies!!!

amazingemmet

Methinks a trip to amsterdam is in order

Matches

Ya bang out of order talking about your mate like that, why dont you shag him at least you will both get your oats then!

dar83

There is a place.....it be called Slapper Faced Jacks..... oh sorry, Copper Face Jacks.

May not be the nicest when talking about your mate, but at least you have ummmm his best interest at heart.

Oh, I just hope his standards aren't too high, otherwise he could be disappointed.

Repli

What do you mean 'get laid' lol.. if he's just looking to kiss a load of girls in 1 night and get numbers - bring him to the usuals - redz, qbar, twentyone, boomerangs, coppers, etc.. wouldn't expect to 'get laid' the same night tho tbh with ya!

Rockstar*

Not only is coppers the biggest kip(newsflash) but I dont see where everyone gets this "slapper face jacks" from...ive been there Id say only 5/6 times but its NEVER stood out to me that people were scoring all over the place ...In my opinion its just bull****,be honest lads if it really was as easy to score there as everyone says it is you'd be there every night

chump

Coppers doesn't compare on the kip scale to Boomerangs ...

My advice would be to bring him to Amsterdam
Or a cheapo holiday to the canaries or something similar
Or else coppers, but I reckon he's too young
Apparently on Monday nites, that place with the low ceiling, Redz, is a drunken youth haven, so it might be a good place to start.

Repli

Oh yeah didn't read the bit about him being 18.. Coppers whenever I have been there was full of 25/26 year olds +

Hmm 18.. Redz/Q/Twentyone(used to be Coyote) are probably the best..

omb0wyn5ehpij9

Rockstar* wrote:

Not only is coppers the biggest kip(newsflash) but I dont see where everyone gets this "slapper face jacks" from...ive been there Id say only 5/6 times but its NEVER stood out to me that people were scoring all over the place ...In my opinion its just bull****,be honest lads if it really was as easy to score there as everyone says it is you'd be there every night

Agreed!

Hal1

All your mate needs to do is have a look at a certain known website and grab a few numbers from it and the rest is up to him

Victor

I don't think this is a PI. Moved to AH.

Nightwish

Go to the Dam if you're that desperate.

Tar.Aldarion

Nightwish wrote:

Go to the Dam if you're that desperate.

Because it is legal there or because you find the girls to have more talent?

Nightwish

cos its legal there or if the guy aint picky there are loadsa girls in Tamangos mid-week or SlapperFace Jacks who'd love a go.

Tar.Aldarion

Nightwish wrote:

cos its legal there

Was hoping for the other answer, but well, beggars can't be choosers.

Heyes

I actually cant believe that this has been posted. I think you have been so shallow as to describe your friend like this. I have no doubt in my mind that he will be well capable of finding a girl that will like him for him, and hopefully not judge him on the awfull company he keeps. :mad:

dar83

Heyes wrote:

I actually cant believe that this has been posted. I think you have been so shallow as to describe your friend like this. I have no doubt in my mind that he will be well capable of finding a girl that will like him for him, and hopefully not judge him on the awfull company he keeps. :mad:

Ah now, we dont know just how fat and ugly the poor chap is exactly. Dont be making rash comments like that without at least first witnessing the Shrek like qualities we are led to believe this chap has.

Sangre

How is it shallow to call your friend fat and ugly?
Its actually the EXACT opposite because despite these qualties he is friends with him AND wants to help him out.

Tar.Aldarion

Sangre wrote:

How is it shallow to call your friend fat and ugly?
Its actually the EXACT opposite because despite these qualties he is friends with him AND wants to help him out.

Indeed, I don't see him ditching his fat ugly (but charming) friend.

Zapp Brannigan

Heh, me and my mates all have a pledge that we'll do everything in our power to prevent our friend from getting laid. Don't ask me why, it was formulated over lunch and seemed like a great idea now we're honour bound to uphold it (til the end of August at least)

Heyes

Tar.Aldarion wrote:

Indeed, I don't see him ditching his fat ugly (but charming) friend.

Are you for real ?!!?!!... jes

Mossy Monk

Slurms wrote:

Heh, me and my mates all have a pledge that we'll do everything in our power to prevent our friend from getting laid

thats what best friends do, help prevent the infection of std's

mawk

uuuummm not to be the one thats looking at this in a wierd way but.....

surely getting him laid by some slapper isnt the best goal..
i mean yeah sex; fun, great, whatever, but is it not a better idea to try and find him an actual girlfriend as opposed to finding him a reason to get an sti check?

i mean someone who actually likes him will make him feel much better than some skank who wont remember his name..

or am i just getting old?

Fast_Mover

mawk wrote:

uuuummm not to be the one thats looking at this in a wierd way but.....

surely getting him laid by some slapper isnt the best goal..
i mean yeah sex; fun, great, whatever, but is it not a better idea to try and find him an actual girlfriend as opposed to finding him a reason to get an sti check?

i mean someone who actually likes him will make him feel much better than some skank who wont remember his name..

or am i just getting old?

ya i agree with mawk!..surely as a friend you'd want that for him!

ps:your not getting old..well unless 19 constitutes getting old these days which i hope not because that means im getting old too!!:(

The_Minister

The OP wants to remain anonymous and he can't do this on this forum so he probably can't answer. It should be moved back.
Maybe his friend is fat and ugly and needs help. It could be that he needs a self-confidence lay.

Chucky the tree

I cant believe my "mate" actually put up this thread aobut me.



and to think i wouldnt even ****ing find out?! :mad:

Fast_Mover

would you think id be right/presumptuous in thinking that his friend is a virgin?..surely he doesnt want to lose his virginity like that?..besides he's only 18..there is plenty of people on boards who lost their virginity when they in their 20's and it not a big deal at all!!
Perhaps ye could help him lose weight and work on his charms with the ladies and find him a girl who likes him for who he is??

perhaps im just getting old..:eek:mawk was right!!...:D

mawk

i remember being a virign and thinking it was the ****tyest thing in the world. as though i was really missing out on something big. then it happened and ten minutes later your like

"oh.... well.... that wasnt worth the hype..."

Fast_Mover

mawk wrote:

i remember being a virign and thinking it was the ****tyest thing in the world. as though i was really missing out on something big. then it happened and ten minutes later your like

"oh.... well.... that wasnt worth the hype..."

perhaps its the people you associate/socialise with and what their thoughts/opinions on 'being a virgin' was made you feel like being a virgin was the shittiest thing in the world..i dont think its a big deal at all and no one should ever feel under pressure to lose it..it should happen for the right reasons and when the person is ready!

mawk

Fast_Mover wrote:

perhaps its the people you associate/socialise with and what their thoughts/opinions on 'being a virgin' was made you feel like being a virgin was the shittiest thing in the world..i dont think its a big deal at all and no one should ever feel under pressure to lose it..it should happen for the right reasons and when the person is ready!

it wasnt their fault it was just how i felt.. and believe me now i can see its not a big deal. in fact i wish i had waited longer. but enough about me

back to slagging off our fine(ish) drinking establishments

The_Minister

Fast_Mover wrote:

perhaps its the people you associate/socialise with and what their thoughts/opinions on 'being a virgin' was made you feel like being a virgin was the shittiest thing in the world..i dont think its a big deal at all and no one should ever feel under pressure to lose it..it should happen for the right reasons and when the person is ready!

You saw the 40 year old virgin didn't you.

Fast_Mover

Firespinner wrote:

You saw the 40 year old virgin didn't you.

believe it or not but i actually havnt..:D
im guessing it contradicted everything i just said in my last post ya..lol..

The_Minister

Actually it backs you up. Lets face it though, noone wants to be 30 and unplucked.

Fast_Mover

Firespinner wrote:

Lets face it though, noone wants to be 30 and unplucked.

ya sure-but the guys only 18!!..he still has another 12 years to be getting worried:D

So Glad

Lets get one thing straight. I'm not fat and definetly not ugly!

But seriously. Enough of the hilarious banter. It's not just easy to bring him to any pub and expect him to get laid because he is there. He'll have to learn the moves. Squats I think are the best ones.

Fast_Mover

So Glad wrote:

Lets get one thing straight. I'm not fat and definetly not ugly!

Ah let us be the judges of that:D

So Glad wrote:

But seriously. It's not just easy to bring him to any pub and expect him to get laid because he is there.

ya i think they're expecting the first girl that they see will put out with him..

Pigman II

BoozyBabe wrote:

:eek: With friends like you, who needs enemies!!!

Cmon he did say he was charming. Plus he's trying to get him laid!

OP, take your aesthetically challenged chum to the most darkly lit pub in your area and seat him next to the ugliest woman you can find in said pub. Add copious amounts of alcohol and then let nature take its course.

Sharza-

How about you help your friend get laid, by helping him be good with women.

Us Men are lucky that our ability to pull women has very little (if at all with some women) to do with how we look, but guys dont get this, because we are guys and so we think like guys. We think, ohh that women is hot and I want to jump on her, so that must mean that women think the same way, and look around for guys who are hot and want to jump them. It doesnt work that way!

Your friend loosing weight would definetly help him with women, as it would probably increase his confidence. Other than that, in terms of appearence, all he has to do is keep himself "well groomed", in other words, have a shower everyday, keep your hair tidy (not mad styled, can be ott for alot of girls).

Everything else to do with picking up women is to do with attitude, body language and personality.

If you want more info, pm me. Just for once lads, take this advice. Mens looks have SOOO little to do with pulling women, infact sometimes if a guy is very good looking, it can make his "game" even harder, because any cocky joke makes him look like he's full of himself, which wouldnt happen to a guy who wasnt good looking.

elivsvonchiaing

Fast_Mover wrote:

ya sure-but the guys only 18!!..he still has another 12 years to be getting worried:D

True but the first year is the worst! I know this so out of compassion I have registered: www.getchuckylayed.com

Vendetta

I know a couple of places, all really similar. Music isnt great but defo try it out. A gym! theyre all over the place

Fast_Mover

elivsvonchiaing wrote:

True but the first year is the worst! I know this so out of compassion I have registered: www.getchuckylayed.com

suppose i better register aswell..out compassion too obviously!!:D

Terry

every once in a while i'll read a post and think 'wow. that person is a complete idiot/wanker. then i remember that i'm reading this on the internet and all is well again for a few hours.

OP, getting laid isn't the be all and end all of life. your friend will find love in due time , without your interference.

Fast_Mover

julep wrote:

every once in a while i'll read a post and think 'wow. that person is a complete idiot/wanker. then i remember that i'm reading this on the internet and all is well again for a few hours.

your not reading your own posts by any chance:p,lol..

The_Minister

Vendetta wrote:

I know a couple of places, all really similar. Music isnt great but defo try it out. A gym! theyre all over the place

Maybe you should say the places?
He can't do a gym the OP said he was fat. Girls donn't like a guy who gets fits of the jiggles.

Kiera

There’s a girl on here who’d be up for it. Infact I hear she’s up for anything with a pulse. You’ll find her name in The Thunderdome.

Scraggs

ooh burn.. lol kiera

TerrorFirmer

Kiera wrote:

There’s a girl on here who’d be up for it. Infact I hear she’s up for anything with a pulse. You’ll find her name in The Thunderdome.

Taking Pigheads tactic of the third person I see....lol

Kiera

HavoK wrote:

Taking Pigheads tactic of the third person I see....lol

Now now HavoK, you know i'm a good girl!

Bosco84

Find yourself a brothel, they can be found in Dublin!

scojones

If all else fails, ask yore ma or your sister. It's how the knackers get laid.