Leaving 9 yr old in car?

jobeenfitz · 01-07-2019 5:46pm #1

My daughter was just telling me a story about being at shop today. Her nine year old daughter didn't want to go into shop so my daughter told me she locked her in the car.

I was surprised and thought this was unsafe and let my daughter know but she just got annoyed.

I'm not sure if car can be opened from inside once locked but I will be checking.

Am I being unreasonable?

jobeenfitz · 01-07-2019 5:46pm

Just for clarity, my daughter was in shop for less than ten mins.

SoupyNorman · 01-07-2019 5:47pm

jobeenfitz wrote: »

...my daughter told me she licked her in the car...

I hope she washed her first.

Ballso · 01-07-2019 5:48pm

Is the kid disabled or something?

jobeenfitz · 01-07-2019 5:51pm

Not disabled

Ballso · 01-07-2019 5:52pm

Then you are being unreasonable yeah

Del2005 · 01-07-2019 5:57pm

jobeenfitz wrote: »

My daughter was just telling me a story about being at shop today. Her nine year old daughter didn't want to go into shop so my daughter told me she locked her in the car.

I was surprised and thought this was unsafe and let my daughter know but she just got annoyed.

I'm not sure if car can be opened from inside once locked but I will be checking.

Am I being unreasonable?

Depends on how you lock the car. On most cars if you hit the lock button once it'll lock the door, but you can open from inside, if you hit lock again it'll dead bolt the car and can't be opened from inside.

Regardless a child should not be left in a vehicle. What if they let off the handbrake of just get out and walk off, not to mention the risk of overheating.

Ballso · 01-07-2019 6:01pm

She's nine, not three. Are nine year olds not allowed to be unsupervised now?

Ballso · 01-07-2019 6:05pm

She's nine, not three. Are nine year olds not allowed to be unsupervised now?

Atlantic Dawn · 01-07-2019 7:00pm

The risk of the car going on fire would be the biggest danger.

Dial Hard · 01-07-2019 7:38pm

Atlantic Dawn wrote:

The risk of the car going on fire would be the biggest danger.

People always bring this up as if vast swathes of cars spontaneously combust every day of the week. Driving your children around in the car is far, far, far more dangerous than leaving them sitting in it alone for any length of time, but no-one ever suggests people should stop driving, because the risk, on a real level, is still tiny.

If you tried to legislate for every potential danger that *might* happen you'd never leave the house. Assess the risks on a realistic basis and make the choice you're happy with. Would I leave a sensible 9-year-old alone in the car for a few minutes while I ran a quick errand? Absolutely.

mvl · 01-07-2019 8:05pm

First, how was the daughter, was she ok with it ?
- I would not be comfortable letting my pre-teen daughter alone in the car, if she is upset: I would rather drop her home if she is, or even postpone my shopping - this is just me.

- its not a fire I'd be fearing (cause this is Ireland, far from being too hot), but how another driver can crash into my car, or something might happen to me - and I wouldn't want to have any passenger locked waiting for me to return if that happens;

Also, note that my daughter would have no phone to ask for help...

So OP I think your reaction was not an exaggeration - but of course you are not the parent in charge on this one ... maybe be mindful that things can be communicated in various ways so that your daughter doesn't feel criticized ...

khaldrogo · 01-07-2019 8:19pm

Ballso wrote:

She's nine, not three. Are nine year olds not allowed to be unsupervised now?

It's all part of the SJW, God bothering nanny state we live in nowadays.....we were left in the car for 10s of minutes many times in the 80s.....I burnt my finger on the cigar lighter once....I'm still alive and learnt a valuable lesson.

harr · 01-07-2019 8:26pm

I think a nine year old should be well capable of staying in car for a couple of minutes and should have the sense to keep car locked and to open car and get out if a problem comes up before parents return.
Good to give the kid some responsibility and to show you trust them to behave a lot of kids are wrapped in cotton wool these days.

mvl · 01-07-2019 8:37pm

but what is the minimum age children can be left alone in the home in Ireland ?
cause I would think leaving them alone in a car would follow same guideline ?
- some states in America 9 yos cannot be left home alone // link

lazygal · 02-07-2019 6:09pm

mvl wrote: »

but what is the minimum age children can be left alone in the home in Ireland ?
cause I would think leaving them alone in a car would follow same guideline ?
- some states in America 9 yos cannot be left home alone // link

There's no prescriptive legislation on leaving a child alone in Ireland, just child neglect offences. I doubt leaving a capable 9 year old for a few minutes comes under that law. At 10 I was allowed to walk home from school and let myself in one afternoon a week because my mum had to bring my siblings to an appointment every week. I was fine.

Chocolate fiend · 04-07-2019 5:12am

I really would not see an issue with it. I'd rather leave them in the car than dragging a grumpy 9 year old around the shop with me.

Neyite · 08-07-2019 10:17am

I leave my 7yo in the car if I'm going into the shop for a few minutes. I lock it so that nobody can open the door from the outside but he can open it at the inside if there's any sort of emergency.

He's had a lot of car safety instructions so is fairly cautious and I know he's content to sit and wait, and won't touch the car controls. Another kid might not, so it depends on the child.

And it also depends on where I'm popping in to. Usually if the car is within sight then I'm ok with that, but if it's not or if I don't know how long I might be, he comes with me.

Hoboo · 08-07-2019 10:23am

I wouldn't leave a bag with a million euro in the car unattended. Nor a 9 year old. But each to their own.

If be more concerned about allowing a 9 year old dictate to an adult.

OP id probably let your daughter be the parent here, or try to be.

idayang · 08-07-2019 12:09pm

my daughter is 8 yrs old.

i did try to leave her alone in the car but both of us felt bad so now i won't do it unless i stop for the butcher for 2 minutes and the car is just 2 meters away from the door.

if she wish to leave the kid in the car, at least she should open the window even in cold days.i am not sure whether she'd lock the car. If she locks it , which can block the girl's way out in emergent situation. if she doesnt lock the door i'm afraid if someone else will enter the car.....

spurious · 08-07-2019 12:15pm

I really don't know how I survived childhood.

pwurple · 08-07-2019 3:38pm

Dial Hard wrote: »

People always bring this up as if vast swathes of cars spontaneously combust every day of the week. Driving your children around in the car is far, far, far more dangerous than leaving them sitting in it alone for any length of time, but no-one ever suggests people should stop driving, because the risk, on a real level, is still tiny.

If you tried to legislate for every potential danger that *might* happen you'd never leave the house. Assess the risks on a realistic basis and make the choice you're happy with. Would I leave a sensible 9-year-old alone in the car for a few minutes while I ran a quick errand? Absolutely.

I know I've only been driving 20 odd years, but in those years, two of my cars have gone on fire. One was a battery fault, it went up in flames while switched off and parked. The other was after an impact... the fuel line was hit. It's still a box sitting on a tank of flammable liquid, and they go up fairly quickly... I wouldn't assume a child could get out in those circumstances. Why lock it?

To be honest, I'd be happier leaving a child at home, or UNLOCKED, than locked in a car, but it really depends on the circumstances. Is it busy there, could the car be side-swiped by a passing bus, or reversed into by some muppet in a carpark... etc

Dravokivich · 12-07-2019 5:29am

I wouldn't do it at all. If I'm going to the shops, the kid is coming in with me. If they want to throw a strop, they can do it wherever as far as I'm concerned.

https://youtu.be/dwEg1RoULBw

If I'm waiting on someone when I'm parked up in the car, I always have the windows down because it gets quite hot. Just sitting there. Electric windows which would be on most cars now, need the key in the ignition.

gctest50 · 12-07-2019 6:29am

Dial Hard wrote: »

People always bring this up as if vast swathes of cars spontaneously combust every day of the week.....

It doesn't take vast swathes to do it, it just takes your car to do it

.

radiata · 12-07-2019 6:32am

I was smoking when I was 9.
You'd swear it was a 9 month old

whelan2 · 12-07-2019 6:36am

radiata wrote: »

I was smoking when I was 9.
You'd swear it was a 9 month old

I saw a toddler left in a car last week. It didn't rest easy with me. A 9 year old would be fine imo.

gctest50 · 12-07-2019 6:37am

whelan2 wrote: »

I saw a toddler left in a car last week. It didn't rest easy with me. A 9 year old would be fine imo.

If it's an electrical fault the 9 year old may not be able to open the door

The toddler will just get roasted to death

Interior fire :

whelan2 · 12-07-2019 6:49am

How often do cars go on fire realistically ?

facehugger99 · 12-07-2019 7:04am

gctest50 wrote: »

It doesn't take vast swathes to do it, it just takes your car to do it

This is the kind of attitude that encourages millions to buy lottery tickets.

Dravokivich · 12-07-2019 8:20am

whelan2 wrote: »

How often do cars go on fire realistically ?

Every day.

facehugger99 · 12-07-2019 8:23am

whelan2 wrote: »

How often do cars go on fire realistically ?

How many don't go on fire?

Leaving 9 yr old in car?

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