What's the stupidest thing you've ever done to yourself?

Started smoking.

Walking home from School one day someone called me. I looked a back and kept walking not realising that my friend had put her school bag down. I fell over the school bag and landed smack down on my face two front teeth gone. I still have know recollection of how the hell we got home.

i was laying a carpet in my brothers house while watching the word cup in 2010.when i was cutting a piece of carpet a goal went in and i cut my wrist with the stanley knife. iddddioott ; )

Was an idiot in my youth...

Bored living in the countryside so would come up with various forms of amusement, generally destructive.

Remember a particularly pleasant sunny day where myself and my brother took turns at shooting a high powered air rifle at stones and rocks to get the cowboy movie rickocet whiiiiinnnnnngggg as the pellet buzzed by our heads. Great fun until one didn't miss, still have a scar on my forehead, could have been much worse.

Found an old book of chemical formulas and discovered gun powder. Amazingly was able to buy all the incredients in several chemists (after learning not to ask for them all at the same time!). Had great fun with gunpowder trails and what not. Decided to take it up a notch and see could we get the stuff to explode rather than just fizzle and burn. Our research showed that a suitable vessel was needed in which the pressure would build up. Got a big coffee jar and quarter filled it with home made gunpowder, plan was that my brother would throw in a match and I'd screw the lid on before hurling it away (I know how dumb that sounds....and was as it turns out...) Jar filled, match thrown, gunpowder fizzles, tried to get the lid on and all I got was a stream of red hot gunpowder gases that burned the heel of my hand away. Had to hide that from my parents for a couple of weeks until it healed, still have a scar to this day, probably should have had plastic surgery...

Decided to take up what seemed like a less dangerous hobby and bought a radio controlled model airplane kit. Didn't have a lot of cash so bought a wooden kit that you had to assemble yourself. Was using an actual medical scapel to trim some parts, was trimming some hardwood with a brand new scapel and putting a lot of pressure on the blade when it suddenly slipped and embedded itself in my thumb. Had to wiggle it to remove as it had stuck in the bone...Didn't hurt till later but bled a whole heap. Took ages to heal as it was such a straight cut, have a nice scar.

Once I finished the plane I bought a second hand engine for it. Was near the end of it's life and not easy to start. Spent ages flicking over the propellor by hand until finally it spluttered into life. With these engines you had to get them running at full speed and then adjust a small knob about half an inch from the back of the propellor in order to tune it. You're supposed to do this from the back. After taking so long to get the thing started it then began to sputter and die, instead of going around behind the thing I tried to reach the needle from the front before the engine died. Unfortunately I miss judged the diameter of the propellor and had the tip of it, which apparently was travelling close to the speed of sound, slice though my middle finger from the the tip, up the nail and to the first joint. Looked like one of those cartoon accidents where a airplane fillets something. Spent the afternoon in hospital having the lose bits of shredded nail pulled out before it could be bandaged up. Hurt rather a lot, still have a wonky nail and scarred finger as a memory...

Motivator wrote: »

I joined a gym when I was about 21. Had never been inside one before & hadn't a clue how to use any machines or how to use the weights area. The first day I was there was a Saturday morning & the place was packed. I was on the threadmill & everything was going grand until in the mirror I noticed a gorgeous girl behind me. I lost concentration for a split second & missed a step on the threadmill which was moving at a fair speed. I lost all balance & fell but managed to regain composure fairly quickly & balance myself but made a massive noise when I fell so when I got back up & running half the gym was laughing at me.

Anyway, feeling a bit hot under the collar I decided to release some tension by using the weight bench. I was wrecked tired from the threadmill, add in the shock & embarrassment of falling & the heat in the gym it was a poor move out of me. I sat down on the bench to compose myself & spotted the lovely girl again. Determined to make up for the embarrassment of the threadmill incident I decided to throw caution to the wind & bench press 50kg. I may not sound a lot but bear in mind I had never touched a weight before & this mixed in with the other factors in hindsight it was a miracle I wasn't killed. Having heard about a "spotter" I didn't know what it was...I wish I had.

With the lovely girl peddling away on her bike I was right in her eyeline. I lay back on the bench & lifted the barbell. Not even halfway up on the first rep my arms buckled & the barbell came straight down on my chest. Broke my breastplate & did huge damage to my ribs. I spent 4 weeks in hospital & another 3 months in rehab being given the confidence to move around. It affected me very badly psychologically as i came very close to dropping the barbell right down on my throat which would have probably chopped my head off.

Hands down the stupidest thing I've ever done to myself & hopefully it will never be topped.

Is your first name Mr?

Not as bad as some of the previous stories, but I regularly drop my phone on my face in bed, punch myself in the face trying to pull up the blankets or else elbow myself in the boob trying to get a jumper/t-shirt off

Wurly wrote: »

A number of years ago, my parents were on holidays and I was the resident house-sitter. One morning I woke up late for work and was rushing like a mad yoke to get out the door. I forgot everything. I closed the front door behind me and just as I heard it close, I realised that both my keys and my phone were still inside. So I had no key to open the porch door. So there I was, for 8 hours, trapped in between the two doors. The postman came and I felt like an awful eejit just sitting in the porch. My rescue came when my next door neighbour finally came home and opened the door with her spare key. I had to shout at her through the letterbox.:pac: I had survived on half a small bottle of water than happened to be in my bag. It was a ROASTING day too.

Gobsh1te!

Winner!