[Purple Mountain]

Fire him

[Mrs OBumble]

OP why do you think they build two cubicles in there, if only one is expected to be in use at a time?

'Cos like you're lads, and anything you do in a cubicle is gonna smell.

I almost wish you did fire him, just for the LOLz it would like the lads in Workplace Relations. (No, I'm not suggesting that you do - just pointing out how silly you'd look when you had to explain it to them.)

[Franz Von Peppercorn]

I’m eating my breakfast, Flash

[K.Flyer]

It's not like he came into your cubicle and and he asked you to shift over a bit on the jacks so he could let rip in beside your own arse ffs.
Who do you think you are, Kim Jong Un? expecting everyone to hold off using a free cubicle while you sh!t in peace. Priceless

[_Kaiser_]

The funniest thing about this thread is that people are taking the OP seriously. Have ye never "met" him before here?

Well played OP.

[Roger Hassenforder]

Where you're going wrong OP is to not have an acoustically insulated trap reserved for yourself.
Put a sign on it 'Reserved for Senior Management' or something, Access via swipe card or pin.

Have a newspaper rack and maybe a Nespresso machine for lengthy stays. A nice throw on the cistern, deep pile rug.Stock only Hanebisho rolls,
give the peons Aldi paper.

[EmmetSpiceland]

Originally Posted by K.Flyer

It's not like he came into your cubicle and and he asked you to shift over a bit on the jacks so he could let rip in beside your own arse ffs.
Who do you think you are, Kim Jong Un? expecting everyone to hold off using a free cubicle while you sh!t in peace. Priceless

He should have waited. There’s two of you there and one of goes into the toilet, you know there’s only one other stall.

Of course, you can start in once you hear the flush but you still shouldn't unleash that level of brown thunder until you hear the hand dryer blast or the main door close.

[Roger Hassenforder]

Originally Posted by Mrs OBumble

OP why do you think they build two cubicles in there, if only one is expected to be in use at a time?

'Cos like you're lads, and anything you do in a cubicle is gonna smell.

I almost wish you did fire him, just for the LOLz it would like the lads in Workplace Relations. (No, I'm not suggesting that you do - just pointing out how silly you'd look when you had to explain it to them.)

There was a rule in the civil service up until very recently, all grades below Executive officer would have to wait until higher grades (Principal Officers, Dept Secretarys etc.) had completed their business in a bathroom and left until they could enter, in case they overheard anything.

[Alf Veedersane]

The only real issue would be if there were 3 cubicles and he picked the empty middle one rather than leave a buffer.

People who do that are monsters.

[JohnnyFlash]

Originally Posted by Roger Hassenforder

Where you're going wrong OP is to not have an acoustically insulated trap reserved for yourself.
Put a sign on it 'Reserved for Senior Management' or something, Access via swipe card or pin.

Have a newspaper rack and maybe a Nespresso machine for lengthy stays. A nice throw on the cistern, deep pile rug.Stock only Hanebisho rolls,
give the peons Aldi paper.

I like this idea.

However I’ve decided I’m just going to block off one of the cubicles so there’s only one available.

[Roger Hassenforder]

Originally Posted by Alf Veedersane

The only real issue woukd be if there were 3 cubicles and he picked the middle one rather than leave a buffer.

People who do that are monsters.

https://www.urinalman.com
If they cant get it right in urinals, what hope is there. This should be thought along with consent classes.

[givyjoe]

The amount of brain donors here taking the original post and op's follow up seriously. Jesus wept.

[Alf Veedersane]

Originally Posted by JohnnyFlash

I like this idea.

However I’ve decided I’m just going to block off one of the cubicles so there’s only one available.

Maybe have some industrial strength cleaners by the sink

[Roger Hassenforder]

Originally Posted by JohnnyFlash

I like this idea.

However I’ve decided I’m just going to block off one of the cubicles so there’s only one available.

That means your peons will have to share your facilities.
Ugggh

[freshpopcorn]

When you've got to go you've got to go!