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Ruining a wedding

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    #332
    KevRossi
    Registered Users Posts: 4,381 ✭✭✭KevRossi


    Wedding in Germany. She was German, he UK. She pulled up outside the church, asked me to call him outside, he did and she said she couldn't go through with it. As I was a groomsman and deemed to be the one who spoke the best English and German, I was told to go up to the front of the chapel and tell them in English, then in German that it was all off, but we could walk over to the reception and get some food. All the UK crowd promptly stood up and went straight away which I thought was funny.

    Was at one in Ireland where he called it off the night before, no mobile phones, so we all showed up at the church the next day and he was waiting there to tell us it was off. About 30 people showed up who had no idea it was off, most having driven a fair distance, all in their finery. We had lunch in the hotel and headed home. Felt sorry for him as people kept arriving in dribs and drabs and he had to tell each group as they arrived and go through some awkward questions.

    Was at one in Durham where the groom got a gift from his mates of a Newcastle United shirt, signed and framed. Later on that night a totally drunk guest got his hands on it, smashed it, ripped the shirt out, pulled his trousers down and started to wipe his arse and crotch with it. He got a hiding and was driven to hospital by the hotel manager. A lot of us stayed there for the night, we had flown over from Germany and there was a big Scottish contingent there. As the night wore on there were several scuffles. Most of the English crowd started to leave from 10 pm onwards and got a string of verbal abuse from the Scots when they were going. The Germans hadn't a bulls notion what was going on, they never knew of the animosity between the Scots and English.

    Was at one in Croatia in 1994 where you could hear sporadic gunfire from the war about 10 km away. Every so often a MIL Mi-28 helicopter gunship would fly overhead to a nearby airfield for refuelling. Not ruined, normality for them, surreal for me.


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    #333
    KevRossi
    Registered Users Posts: 4,381 ✭✭✭KevRossi


    Irish wedding in late 2006. Celtic Tiger job, 240 people at it. I was my then GF's +1. Brides family had a lot of land near a major midlands town that they sold off to developers and made a few million on it. Never had a bean before that. So they decided to go totally overboard with the wedding.

    Speeches start. Groom's Dad keeps it short, less than 10 mins. Brides Dad pulls out a sheaf of cards and starts a 35 minute speech, never mentions the groom once. Then walks to another table and hands the mic to a local councillor, he speaks for about 20 mins, then hands it to 2 other councillors and a TD, they all spoke for 20 mins each. Barely mentioned the couple, most of it was gearing up for the 2007 election. Crazy stuff. Eventually the bride's Dad gets the mic back and is nearly in tears saying how much the family owes the politicians etc etc. and how the groom should count himself lucky (groom was fairly loaded himself, worked in medical equipment). Starts to say how grooms family never amounted to anything and were a known disgrace (grooms parents split up in the late 80's which was a big thing at the time). Eventually shut up after over 2 hours. We had the luck of being in one side of the 'L' shaped function hall so we could nip out to the jacks and for pints, others were not so lucky.

    As the evening wore on the politicians got worse and drunker, one of them consistently went up to the band and told them what to play instead of the list the couple gave them. People trying to outdo each other in buying bottles of champagne. Bar manager was cute enough to keep saying 'I think we've only a couple left' so people kept rushing to the bar to get more. Bride and groom were largely forgotten in the dick measuring contest that it became. Very uncomfortable wedding, we were stuck there as we had a room booked in the hotel.


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    #334
    Beechwoodspark
    Registered Users Posts: 15,281 ✭✭✭✭Beechwoodspark


    JohnMcm1 wrote: »
    Heard of a wedding where the best man and groom had to be put to bed before the meal.

    I was at a wedding where the groom fell asleep from drink straight after the main course. Literally asleep head down on the table.

    Lot of activity up at the top table, people fanning him down etc etc. Jugs of water being rushed up there. Hysterics from the bride.

    He was Absolutely wrote off drunk.

    He was always what I call a stupid drinker ie he used to drink stupid drinks like treble vodkas in a pint glass and got plastered drunk.

    He was brought up to a bedroom slept it off and then around half 10 or so came back down to the wedding. He went around mingling with ppl and tried to laugh it off but there was this real awkward atmosphere.

    His bride and the mother in law were like bulldogs chewing thistles over it


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    #335
    ontour2
    Registered Users Posts: 133 ✭✭ontour2


    from behind the bar....

    All went well up to 11pm, which in hindsight was a miracle.

    Step-father of bride pitches up at the reception desk to pay the bill. While the bill is being collated and the step-father counts out piles of cash, word gets back to the bride's father, who was also at the wedding, that the step-father was paying the bill. An argument ensues as the father demands that he is paying for his own daughter's wedding. To which the step-father replies that she is not really the 'fathers' child anyway, he was only the person picked to take the bullet 28 years prior. Still not sure whether the step-father was claiming her or just pointing out the loose moral compass of his current wife.

    At this stage the argument was loud and there was a bit of shoving but no more. As we tried to calm the situation the son of the step father and one of the sons of the father arrived on the scene. The two lads in their twenties initially tried to separate their Dads but somehow ended up fighting with each-other.

    Now neither of the lads were aware of this impending fight and had no training done. They were also both about 7 hours in to a drinking session. So after about 5 minutes they were wrecked and easy to separate. One was immediately put outside the front door and the door was locked. The second was so tired that we were having trouble getting him to his feet. Eventually got him to his feet, at which point we heard a massive crash. The bloke that had been put out the front door had punched through reinforced glass and put his hand in through the broken door pane to open the latch. He stepped inside looking like Arnie 80 minutes in to any film, blood pumping from his hand and dripping on the carpet. We are still propping up the other bloke, at which point he roars down at us "Will ya be careful, Davey has Asthma". Turns out the two lads were actually good mates.

    Queue the perfectly timed arrival of the guards and our absolute delight to hand over the situation as we had absolutely no idea what our next move was. The guy who punched the window, to ensure we took appropriate care of the guy he was fighting with, had to have multiple operations to repair his hand.


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    #336
    glenfieldman
    Registered Users Posts: 1,884 ✭✭✭glenfieldman


    KevRossi wrote: »
    Irish wedding in late 2006. Celtic Tiger job, 240 people at it. I was my then GF's +1. Brides family had a lot of land near a major midlands town that they sold off to developers and made a few million on it. Never had a bean before that. So they decided to go totally overboard with the wedding.

    Speeches start. Groom's Dad keeps it short, less than 10 mins. Brides Dad pulls out a sheaf of cards and starts a 35 minute speech, never mentions the groom once. Then walks to another table and hands the mic to a local councillor, he speaks for about 20 mins, then hands it to 2 other councillors and a TD, they all spoke for 20 mins each. Barely mentioned the couple, most of it was gearing up for the 2007 election. Crazy stuff. Eventually the bride's Dad gets the mic back and is nearly in tears saying how much the family owes the politicians etc etc. and how the groom should count himself lucky (groom was fairly loaded himself, worked in medical equipment). Starts to say how grooms family never amounted to anything and were a known disgrace (grooms parents split up in the late 80's which was a big thing at the time). Eventually shut up after over 2 hours. We had the luck of being in one side of the 'L' shaped function hall so we could nip out to the jacks and for pints, others were not so lucky.

    As the evening wore on the politicians got worse and drunker, one of them consistently went up to the band and told them what to play instead of the list the couple gave them. People trying to outdo each other in buying bottles of champagne. Bar manager was cute enough to keep saying 'I think we've only a couple left' so people kept rushing to the bar to get more. Bride and groom were largely forgotten in the dick measuring contest that it became. Very uncomfortable wedding, we were stuck there as we had a room booked in the hotel.

    Give a clue to the politicians involved


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    #337
    DJIMI TRARORE
    Registered Users Posts: 3,558 ✭✭✭DJIMI TRARORE


    Anybody remember a story from a few years ago, a county "gaa star" getting married, holds up 2 honeymoon envelopes and hands them to his new wife and tells her they are for herself and best man who had been shagging for ages, I know the name of player but don't know if true


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    #338
    B!gD0g543
    Registered Users Posts: 20 ✭B!gD0g543


    cena wrote: »
    Has anyone here ruined a wedding or been to a wedding that was ruined? Let us say, someone has stood up during the mass service and said that this person should not marry him or she.

    I did. I went uninvited to the wedding. I drank a lot. I puked on the dance floor!


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    #339
    B!gD0g543
    Registered Users Posts: 20 ✭B!gD0g543


    Ubbquittious wrote: »
    Kind of. Twas me that did the ruining. Won't go into any more detail than that. Great satisfaction from it though

    I think I know what you mean my friend LOL Hope you had a great time at least!


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    #340
    Atlantic Dawn
    Registered Users Posts: 81,154 ✭✭✭✭Atlantic Dawn
    M


    Conall Cernach wrote: »
    At a wedding that I was at the groom had a son from a previous relationship and a couple of children with the bride. When getting the photos taken the bride insisted on getting one of "just the family" and deliberately excluded the son. The groom's mother was livid and still doesn't talk to her now daughter in law. In fairness the groom must be some gob****e to allow that.


    As a guest at such a wedding I'd have left right there and then if I was a guest of the bride or groom as that's a bloody disgrace. The groom staying with such a bitch would deserve excuminaction from his friends.


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    #341
    ziedth
    Moderators, Entertainment Moderators, Regional South East Moderators Posts: 9,081 Mod ✭✭✭✭ziedth


    Its amusing as cliché that it is in movies I have never heard of someone running in with a "i love you don't marry him" type thing..... I luckily have never seen anything near as bad as some of these stories. The worst was probably my own wedding (although thankfully it didn't ruin the day) but we brought up our wedding a year after we came into a bit of money so it was all very slap dash.

    The band weren't in our top 5 picks for the day but would have been well known on the wedding circuit and we liked them live. Anyway, less than a week before the wedding I get an email saying "despite what you might have heard we are still together and will be at you wedding" i don't say anything to the wife as it was too late to do anything and they had confirmed. Anyway, long story short I ask around and I find out the 4 lads had an eastenders level row the previous week and had a full on fight in the pub and this was their last time playing together. They literally stood at 4 corners of the stage, didn't talk or acknowledge each other for the whole night. Maybe people were bing nice but nobody I talked to afterwards said they even noticed but I couldn't take my eyes off them for the whole night expecting either a fight or the wife to catch on and get upset over it. Luckily got away with it and I laugh about it now but it was a worry on the night.


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    #342
    deandean
    Registered Users Posts: 2,218 ✭✭✭deandean


    I was at a wedding in Cork 18mths ago.
    The band looked like they had never met each other before tonight.
    None of them spoke English.
    They had tablets set up on the microphone stands with the the lyrics and chords of the songs, and they did their best to perform.
    I won't say the band ruined the wedding, but Jeez they were breww-tal!


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    #343
    Recliner
    Registered Users Posts: 879 ✭✭✭Recliner


    Worst one I was at, the father of groom during his speech veered of into the whole "800 years of oppression" rant against the English. 20 minutes of absolute bile, no one had a clue what was going on.
    It was mortifying.


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    #344
    volono
    Registered Users Posts: 217 ✭✭volono


    Wanderer78 wrote: »
    would you not see it as how messed up society has gotten in regards these events, that couples are nearly financially broken, before they even crack on with a mortgage and kids?

    No one asked them, to have the wedding they did!!!. If they wanted a day that big, my god!!!, they should have been able to afford it.
    If not, leave it off for a year or two, save up and do it then. Christ!!!!


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    #345
    Toots
    Administrators, Business & Finance Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 16,905 Admin ✭✭✭✭✭Toots


    I actually asked our priest if he'd ever had anyone object when they do the "speak now or forever hold your peace" bit and he said he never had, nor had he ever heard of it happening with any other priests he knew.

    The night before my cousin's wedding her ex showed up at her family home in an attempt to win her back (they'd been broken up a few years at that stage). My cousin wasn't there - she was out doing some last minute bits, but my uncle ran him. Unbeknownst to my cousin, my uncle put the bridesmaids and groomsmen on the alert to keep an eye out in case the guy decided to do something mad like show up at the church, but it was all grand and no sign of him.

    Weirdest part was he was the one who has broken up with her, and she had never seen or heard from him again after so it was completely bizarre that he rocked up at the house.


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    #346
    jmayo
    Registered Users Posts: 13,083 ✭✭✭✭jmayo


    Wedding related I suppose ...
    The in-laws were invited to wedding in Dublin so up from the country for the day.
    Days before satnavs so they had trouble finding church and were late at this stage.
    Spotted church with loads of cars outside so quickly parked up and rushed in.
    Of course they went far up the church and pushed in.
    Herself was all done up with big hat and flowery dress.

    Then it suddenly dawns on them that there is a coffin at the top.

    They then had to get up and sheepishly walk back down the church out of some poor devils funeral.

    Was at black tie wedding in one of those stately castle type places.
    All very nice, but fecking hell you didn't get fed until near 10 o'clock.

    The worst part was yer man went to one of those Dublin private rugby playing schools and the best's man speech was like something written by Ross O'Carroll Kelly.
    And then the plebs amongst us thought after that hogwash we would get relief with the groom's builder/developer father's speech, but it was even worse.


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    #347
    poisonated
    Registered Users Posts: 2,277 ✭✭✭poisonated


    I know someone who was getting married and the groom was in the British army and was shot at by an Ira guy known as “the fox”. I’m sure that ruined the wedding.


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    #348
    Sebastian Dangerfield
    Registered Users Posts: 1,793 ✭✭✭Sebastian Dangerfield


    I was at a wedding abroad whereby all travelling Irish guests were told the venue was a central venue with lots to do, and we should stay there. It turned out to be a ****heap in the middle of a forest, €70 in a taxi from where we thought it was. I genuinely think they got a discount for filling it, and there were blatant attempts to fleece us while there that I think they were complicit in.

    There was nothing to do, and the ceremony wasn't til 5, so every Irish man and half the women ended up having breakfast and going to the bar. This is day 3 for most people. There was a barman with very little English who noticed they were tipping freely, so starts giving out a one shot bottle of Jager with every pint. I got there at 2 and everyone was ruined. 10 to 5, the bar is still full and half the place are still in jeans, and the bridesmaids are going crazy trying to round people up so the bride can do her dream walk down the hotel stairs with people in awe gasping at her beauty either side. She can wait no longer, so ends up walking down the stairs in tears while half the men push past her up the stairs to get ready, now the bar has been closed.

    Church is no better - an Indian man with little English saying mass, so people start chatting among themselves, bar one gee eyed uncle, who gets down on his knees, arms outstretched like he's seen the blessed virgin, while they're saying their vows. It didn't get much better as the night wore on.

    The next day we all broke free and got taxis to the city, which caused ructions as there was a dinner planned that we all thought was laid on by them, but they were actually expecting us to pay for as a contribution to their wedding "package" (in addition to gifts). Lots of people fell out in the months to come.


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    #349
    Odyssey 2005
    Registered Users Posts: 21,065 ✭✭✭✭Odyssey 2005


    Sebastian Dangerfield wrote: »
    I was at a wedding abroad whereby all travelling Irish guests were told the venue was a central venue with lots to do, and we should stay there. It turned out to be a ****heap in the middle of a forest, €70 in a taxi from where we thought it was. I genuinely think they got a discount for filling it, and there were blatant attempts to fleece us while there that I think they were complicit in.

    There was nothing to do, and the ceremony wasn't til 5, so every Irish man and half the women ended up having breakfast and going to the bar. This is day 3 for most people. There was a barman with very little English who noticed they were tipping freely, so starts giving out a one shot bottle of Jager with every pint. I got there at 2 and everyone was ruined. 10 to 5, the bar is still full and half the place are still in jeans, and the bridesmaids are going crazy trying to round people up so the bride can do her dream walk down the hotel stairs with people in awe gasping at her beauty either side. She can wait no longer, so ends up walking down the stairs in tears while half the men push past her up the stairs to get ready, now the bar has been closed.

    Church is no better - an Indian man with little English saying mass, so people start chatting among themselves, bar one gee eyed uncle, who gets down on his knees, arms outstretched like he's seen the blessed virgin, while they're saying their vows. It didn't get much better as the night wore on.

    The next day we all broke free and got taxis to the city, which caused ructions as there was a dinner planned that we all thought was laid on by them, but they were actually expecting us to pay for as a contribution to their wedding "package" (in addition to gifts). Lots of people fell out in the months to come.

    There's a film in that !


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    #350
    Sebastian Dangerfield
    Registered Users Posts: 1,793 ✭✭✭Sebastian Dangerfield


    Odyssey 2005 wrote: »
    There's a film in that !

    I have left out a lot of detail due to an irrational fear that someone in attendance will read it, and easily identify it. It was pretty unique!


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    #351
    shtpEdthePlum
    Closed Accounts Posts: 556 ✭✭✭shtpEdthePlum


    Red Silurian wrote: »
    I heard from the priest that did my wedding, he was conducting a ceremony a few weeks earlier and the groom had a bit too much whiskey that morning, legally speaking the priest couldn't marry them because it's the signing of a legal contract and you can't be under the influence
    That's bollocks, if the wedding was planned for a year beforehand that is a tacit agreement that the contract was going to be signed. It would be next to nigh on impossible to prove he was drunk when it was signed. He was just looking for another fee the prick.


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    #352
    shesty
    Moderators, Recreation & Hobbies Moderators, Social & Fun Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 6,893 Mod ✭✭✭✭shesty


    I wouldn't say ruined, but I did attend a wedding where the groom's father gave a speech that was bordering on extremely insulting to the bride.Worse, once he had finished that bit, he launched into a 30 minute bewildering ramble where he basically explored various branches of his family tree, making out that his family were far better than hers (she is absolutely classy, the groom got very lucky).There was also a priest in attendance who was a family friend and he made a short speech that also left me shocked, it was really belittling of her.

    She didn't notice on the day, but a few months later I was talking to her about the day in general and the realisation had sunk in that neither speech had been appropriate at all.


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    #353
    tea and coffee
    Registered Users Posts: 1,823 ✭✭✭tea and coffee


    I dimly recall a thread on here from an artist who was invited to a wedding and as a gift was asked to/ going to paint a picture of the cpuple. The bride and her mother also tried to strong arm her into buying an expensive blender (or similar) as the painting wasn't deemed a "real present "
    Think the day was shambolic enough as well where is dawned on people that the menu in the venue had prices and they were being asked to pay for their meal.

    Must have a look for it


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    #354
    Sebastian Dangerfield
    Registered Users Posts: 1,793 ✭✭✭Sebastian Dangerfield


    tea and coffee wrote: »
    I dimly recall a thread on here from an artist who was invited to a wedding and as a gift was asked to/ going to paint a picture of the cpuple. The bride and her mother also tried to strong arm her into buying an expensive blender (or similar) as the painting wasn't deemed a "real present "
    Think the day was shambolic enough as well where is dawned on people that the menu in the venue had prices and they were being asked to pay for their meal.

    Must have a look for it

    The stand mixer story! Remember it well


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    #355
    screamer
    Registered Users Posts: 6,131 ✭✭✭screamer


    Sebastian Dangerfield wrote: »
    I have left out a lot of detail due to an irrational fear that someone in attendance will read it, and easily identify it. It was pretty unique!

    Fawlty Towers the Wedding
    Complete with Manuel the barman


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    #356
    nibtrix
    Registered Users Posts: 1,305 ✭✭✭nibtrix


    tea and coffee wrote: »
    I dimly recall a thread on here from an artist who was invited to a wedding and as a gift was asked to/ going to paint a picture of the cpuple. The bride and her mother also tried to strong arm her into buying an expensive blender (or similar) as the painting wasn't deemed a "real present "
    Think the day was shambolic enough as well where is dawned on people that the menu in the venue had prices and they were being asked to pay for their meal.

    Must have a look for it

    Enjoy!
    https://touch.boards.ie/thread/2057355848/1


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    #357
    tea and coffee
    Registered Users Posts: 1,823 ✭✭✭tea and coffee


    Sebastian Dangerfield wrote: »
    The stand mixer story! Remember it well

    https://touch.boards.ie/thread/2057355848/1

    Its a great read.

    I got confused: the paying for your own meal was a separate wedding https://touch.boards.ie/thread/2057262110


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    #358
    Jimmy Bottlehead
    Registered Users Posts: 10,118 ✭✭✭✭Jimmy Bottlehead


    PGE1970 wrote: »
    One of my pals was Best Man for a pal of ours. Rural wedding down the country.

    He proceeded to entertain the congregation with tales of the groom including those of his "lively" past life.

    Including this belter of a line which stunned the room apart from our table who were crying with laughter.....

    "He never went to bed with a dog. But he certainly woke up with a few!"

    Which part of the country was this in?


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    #359
    NewbridgeIR
    Registered Users Posts: 3,713 ✭✭✭NewbridgeIR


    SCOOP 64 wrote: »
    Going by the last 2 post all weddings in the Uk must be the same then.

    I've been to weddings in England and Wales and yes, both quite dry and sedate compared to Irish shindigs. The Welsh one was over by 11.00pm and no-one seemed to be bothered. It was held in a marquee in the middle of nowhere so couldn't go onto any other pub.

    Their funerals are similarly bad. Shockingly impersonal and cold. Held ages after the death, very few people there etc.


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    #360
    Elliejo
    Registered Users Posts: 153 ✭✭Elliejo


    poisonated wrote: »
    I know someone who was getting married and the groom was in the British army and was shot at by an Ira guy known as “the fox”. I’m sure that ruined

    I know the one you mean.ðŸ™


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    #361
    Sebastian Dangerfield
    Registered Users Posts: 1,793 ✭✭✭Sebastian Dangerfield


    NewbridgeIR wrote: »
    Their funerals are similarly bad. Shockingly impersonal and cold. Held ages after the death, very few people there etc.

    Off topic but I think I prefer their attitude to funerals to be honest. The use of death as a social activity in this country really gets on my t1ts.


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